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how to get someone you meet up with just for casual sex? watch

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    (Original post by Sithius)
    Nihilism more your thing then?
    My main purpose is to maintain my happiness and the happiness of those I care for and basically enjoying life. So no.
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    rohypnol
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    I won't have some fundamentalists controll my mindset either.
    What I've been wondering about, is it really that easy? Asking, given you're on friendly terms? And if you are, how do you know you're on fancying terms? ...there's something I'm missing out on... (I'm single, btw, so if you think "immoral", then eff off)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How did so many of you get people who you meet up with for casual sex? are they just exes?
    there was a thread where about 50% had them.
    If you're a boy, is there any way you can actively seek one?

    Also, I'd like to ask girls here, what's the objection, provided the boy hasn't got a repulsive body and/or face? I saw another thread where loads of you admitted to having vibrators, so why not the real thing more instead? Isn't the real thing more of a life experience than your imagination?
    Do you just not trust boys who aren't actually boyfriends well enough not to hurt you in some way? Or is it STDs? reputation? seriously though, when i look at the amount of effort you all put into appearance, and the amount of action you have to show for it, the effort just seems wasted.
    I would much rather be in a relationship with someone I loved (or thought I did at the time, if you get what I mean). I find that much more comfortable than the prospect of sleeping with someone I simply got on with. Tbh, I can't actually imagine myself ever taking part in casual sex or a one night stand. It's not that I wouldn't trust him not to hurt me, I'm sure he'd be very good at what he was doing if he did this regularly. Besides, who wants the STD's?
    Not many girls you meet are actually making themselves up just to get sex, it's more to do with that it boosts their confidence when they get comments/looks from guys and makes them feel good about themselves. A wasted effort? I think not
    • #4
    #4

    Im a girl who at uni will probs want to have casual sex rather than a relationship due to me being in long term relationships for several years with different lads. I want to enjoy uni but have sex and still be single... basically to have my cake and eat it. If your sensible then you wont have STIs or get pregnant. If i develop feelings then you just get out before you get hurt. Basically im sick of being guys
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    (Original post by karim1604)
    I won't have some fundamentalists controll my mindset either.
    What I've been wondering about, is it really that easy? Asking, given you're on friendly terms? And if you are, how do you know you're on fancying terms? ...there's something I'm missing out on... (I'm single, btw, so if you think "immoral", then eff off)
    It really is that easy.

    I knew a friend of mine fancied me, I stayed back at his after a party, we got talking, he kissed me, then we talked for about three hours discussing how exactly a casual relationship would work between us. Discussion and absolutely honesty is the key. If you can't be completely honest, and if you can't do the right thing for you, then casual sex is probably a really bad idea. For me, I know it's the right thing, and I know that if I ever develop romantic feelings for the person I'm sleeping with things have to change, immediately. I doubt I will, to be honest- we're both very much in love with our exes, neither of us are really in a position to trust anyone, and we both enjoy sex. A lot.

    I am a great advocate of sex for pleasure.
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    (Original post by Davezk)
    You hype up sex too much. Why does anyone have to be married to stick one part of their body in someone else. Is there some kind of holy spiritual significance that i am missing out on? Seriously though who are you to condemn people and force your opinions on us? I'm not a religious person, I'm not held back by old fashioned morals so quite frankly I can do what I want. Why do you care what others do? Focus on your own life rather than look down on others.
    It's much more complicated than that. When the drunk illicit couples are unable to put their contraception because they couldn't think properly (or any other reason for contraception not functioning or not being put) and then the woman get's pregnant, and they agree that they should resort to abortion just because they were "fooling around", is it then just "stick one part of the body in someone else"?
    This all stems from seeing no purpose in anything in life. No understanding of why could it really be that this "sticking of one organ into another" causes so much enjoyment. I ask you: If there was no fun in sex, would you have even existed? Would your ancestors have even bothered to get married and "stick an organ in another" to face years of enormous financial, mental, and physical burden and responsibility that come with raising up children and building a family? The pain that the mother goes through is alone enough to discourage such a thing. Why do you think there's this urge and sexual desire that builds up in you? Is it just an accident of nature? You should look for the correct place to satisfy this sexual urge. You don't just pee on the ground in front of everyone when there you feel urgent? You resist and be patient until you find a washroom. Peeing on the ground in front of everyone creates a mess and odor and really bothers people around you, so you resist it. It is just ignorance that blinds you from knowing the harm of having sex wherever and whenever you want, and it is passive acceptance from surrounding society that does not discourage you to do such a thing.

    You see, I would completely agree with everyone's unconditional individual liberties if each of us lives in his own little box isolated from and has no effect on the surrounding society, but the reality is far from this.
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    (Original post by ~ABR~)
    It's much more complicated than that. When the drunk illicit couples are unable to put their contraception because they couldn't think properly (or any other reason for contraception not functioning or not being put) and then the woman get's pregnant, and they agree that they should resort to abortion just because they were "fooling around", is it then just "stick one part of the body in someone else"?
    This all stems from seeing no purpose in anything in life. No understanding of why could it really be that this "sticking of one organ into another" causes so much enjoyment. I ask you: If there was no fun in sex, would you have even existed? Would your ancestors have even bothered to get married and "stick an organ in another" to face years of enormous financial, mental, and physical burden and responsibility that come with raising up children and building a family? The pain that the mother goes through is alone enough to discourage such a thing. Why do you think there's this urge and sexual desire that builds up in you? Is it just an accident of nature? You should look for the correct place to satisfy this sexual urge. You don't just pee on the ground in front of everyone when there you feel urgent? You resist and be patient until you find a washroom. Peeing on the ground in front of everyone creates a mess and odor and really bothers people around you, so you resist it. It is just ignorance that blinds you from knowing the harm of having sex wherever and whenever you want, and it is passive acceptance from surrounding society that does not discourage you to do such a thing.

    You see, I would completely agree with everyone's unconditional individual liberties if each of us lives in his own little box isolated from and has no effect on the surrounding society, but the reality is far from this.

    I don't really understand your argument... how does having casual sex actually harm anyone else? There's no utilitarian reason to decline from having consensual, no strings sex with someone. Your views seem to be based on the assumption that being celibate is moral, without you actually explaining why this is.
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    (Original post by ~ABR~)
    It's much more complicated than that. When the drunk illicit couples are unable to put their contraception because they couldn't think properly (or any other reason for contraception not functioning or not being put) and then the woman get's pregnant, and they agree that they should resort to abortion just because they were "fooling around", is it then just "stick one part of the body in someone else"?
    This all stems from seeing no purpose in anything in life. No understanding of why could it really be that this "sticking of one organ into another" causes so much enjoyment. I ask you: If there was no fun in sex, would you have even existed? Would your ancestors have even bothered to get married and "stick an organ in another" to face years of enormous financial, mental, and physical burden and responsibility that come with raising up children and building a family? The pain that the mother goes through is alone enough to discourage such a thing. Why do you think there's this urge and sexual desire that builds up in you? Is it just an accident of nature? You should look for the correct place to satisfy this sexual urge. You don't just pee on the ground in front of everyone when there you feel urgent? You resist and be patient until you find a washroom. Peeing on the ground in front of everyone creates a mess and odor and really bothers people around you, so you resist it. It is just ignorance that blinds you from knowing the harm of having sex wherever and whenever you want, and it is passive acceptance from surrounding society that does not discourage you to do such a thing.

    You see, I would completely agree with everyone's unconditional individual liberties if each of us lives in his own little box isolated from and has no effect on the surrounding society, but the reality is far from this.
    How does this apply to me, for example? I never indulge in drunken casual sex. Ever. It's just not something that appeals to me. Neither do I think of sex as 'sticking one organ into another'. It means a lot to me, and I have a great deal of respect for the action of sex and the consequences that might arise from it. I completely understand the possible consequences of sex, and am prepared to raise a child; for the past few years, I've been a surrogate mother to a child whose own mother is unable to care for him. I always use contraception (a decision that has sometimes lead to having to refuse to have sex with someone because they prefer not to use contraception- strange, strange people).

    The thought of my ancestors getting married amuses me. Nobody in my family has indulged in marriage for at least three generations.

    Explain to me who I am hurting through my actions. As the person above said- explain how abstaining from casual sex is inherently moral. I'm intruiged by your viewpoint- I'm assuming you're unmarried, and have therefore never experienced sex yourself? In which case, while I'm sure you've felt the urge, you must be unable to understand just how incredible sex is. I am constantly amazed and awed at what my body is capable of. I have loved and will only ever love one person, but I don't see why I should have to deny myself sexual pleasure for the next few years while we mature individually.
    • #5
    #5

    Girl really fancied me, I made it clear I didnt feel the same way back, She comprimised and so we became **** buddies.

    Win
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    (Original post by cazamatazz)
    How does this apply to me, for example? I never indulge in drunken casual sex. Ever. It's just not something that appeals to me. Neither do I think of sex as 'sticking one organ into another'. It means a lot to me, and I have a great deal of respect for the action of sex and the consequences that might arise from it. I completely understand the possible consequences of sex, and am prepared to raise a child; for the past few years, I've been a surrogate mother to a child whose own mother is unable to care for him. I always use contraception (a decision that has sometimes lead to having to refuse to have sex with someone because they prefer not to use contraception- strange, strange people).

    The thought of my ancestors getting married amuses me. Nobody in my family has indulged in marriage for at least three generations.

    Explain to me who I am hurting through my actions. As the person above said- explain how abstaining from casual sex is inherently moral. I'm intruiged by your viewpoint- I'm assuming you're unmarried, and have therefore never experienced sex yourself? In which case, while I'm sure you've felt the urge, you must be unable to understand just how incredible sex is. I am constantly amazed and awed at what my body is capable of. I have loved and will only ever love one person, but I don't see why I should have to deny myself sexual pleasure for the next few years while we mature individually.
    Well my reply was not to you. I respect your views. I believe you deserve to be protected from a man who might just choose to dump you after he got what he wanted from you. Now I am not saying anything about your partner I'm sure since you have made it this far things should go pretty well and I hope they do, but do understand that this is a slippery slope, and many girls end up with broken hearts because of this. If both sides' family are directly involved from the beginning, only serious, committed individuals will approach you to be a partner in life, and any unfortunate disputes (which are almost always unavoidable) will be more controlled, and a break-up won't be just like an easy way out.
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    (Original post by ~ABR~)
    Well my reply was not to you. I respect your views. I believe you deserve to be protected from a man who might just choose to dump you after he got what he wanted from you. Now I am not saying anything about your partner I'm sure since you have made it this far things should go pretty well and I hope they do, but do understand that this is a slippery slope, and many girls end up with broken hearts because of this. If both sides' family are directly involved from the beginning, only serious, committed individuals will approach you to be a partner in life, and any unfortunate disputes (which are almost always unavoidable) will be more controlled, and a break-up won't be just like an easy way out.
    I'm not really up for being mollycoddled to that degree. I get what you're saying, and at some level it does sound attractive- there's no denying that. I've been dumped by men more times than I care to remember, both before and after sex. That kind of 'wham bam thank-you ma'am' is pretty alien to me, to be honest. If the sex is good, and there's no prospect of a relationship, why leave it at that?

    But getting my family involved? I mean, hell, I don't think any member of my family has ever made a good decision about anything. I certainly wouldn't trust them to find me a partner.

    The person I'm currently sleeping with is in no sense a 'partner', by the way. He is a friend who I happen to have sex with. I wouldn't ever consider him as someone to share anything more significant than a bed with- certainly not my life, certainly not a family.

    You didn't actually answer any of my questions, by the by. To the casual observer it might seem like you avoided the question of morality/immorality by moving onto the subject of poor little girls who shouldn't get their hearts broken. I'd... it might sound strange, but I'd rather have had the experiences I've had than had one person for an entire lifetime. Of course they haven't always been enjoyable, but they've made me into the person I am. I think my life would be so much more the poorer without those experiences. Besides, when I'm older, alone or otherwise, I can look back on a lot of good sex and a lot of good company and feel, well, comforted by it, I guess.
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    People preach that casual sex doesn't hurt anyone but the couple involved, even though this is obviously not true. If a girl engages in casual sex, she is at greater risk of catching STI's, even if she is 'being safe'. She may then meet someone she wants to date exclusively and so he now will be at risk of infection, because of her former promiscuity. HIV could be past on to both her partner and children, ruining their lives, just because she, once upon a time, wanted some 'fun'. Casual sex is a pretty selfish act.
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    Well this is why we invented that thing known as the almighty "durex" and contraceptive pill, so the responsibility of parenthood can be avoided while the pleasure of sex can be enjoyed. Humans and dolphins are the only animals that have sex for pleasure, and not purely for reproduction. If we have the tecchnology to get the benefits without the difficulties, then why on earth not? As long as both parties are consenting. This isn't exactly a new thing either, they've been using contraceptive pills for 50 years now, and condoms even longer than that.
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    (Original post by vortex_199)
    People preach that casual sex doesn't hurt anyone but the couple involved, even though this is obviously not true. If a girl engages in casual sex, she is at greater risk of catching STI's, even if she is 'being safe'. She may then meet someone she wants to date exclusively and so he now will be at risk of infection, because of her former promiscuity. HIV could be past on to both her partner and children, ruining their lives, just because she, once upon a time, wanted some 'fun'. Casual sex is a pretty selfish act.
    Because... everyone has AIDS?
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    (Original post by cazamatazz)
    Because... everyone has AIDS?
    Is this a serious response?
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    (Original post by vortex_199)
    Is this a serious response?
    Was the notion that a promiscuous, condom-usin' lady would pass on HIV to her future partner and children serious?
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    Facebook.

    Easy as.
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    Go on one of those like adult friend finder things aha.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How did so many of you get people who you meet up with for casual sex? are they just exes?

    Don't you know the ABC's of casual sex partners?

    Alcohol, Bludgeoning or Chloroform.
 
 
 
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