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    (Original post by Pathway)
    I do, but I know you're struggling so, I'd feel bad/don't want to trigger you at all. :dontknow: Something keeping you up? :console:
    We can give it a go, since the main thing that seems to persistently haunt you is something that doesn't really trigger me? :dontknow: I wanna help if poss :yes:

    Brain won't shut down :no:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    We can give it a go, since the main thing that seems to persistently haunt you is something that doesn't really trigger me? :dontknow: I wanna help if poss :yes:

    Brain won't shut down :no:
    It's not really that at the moment, but thank you, it means a lot to me. I just. I don't know. It's not really that important I guess, haha? We can still chat if you need/want to though? I want to help you if I can, too.
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    (Original post by Pathway)
    It's not really that at the moment, but thank you, it means a lot to me. I just. I don't know. It's not really that important I guess, haha? We can still chat if you need/want to though? I want to help you if I can, too.
    You can PM me if you think it might help.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    You can PM me if you think it might help.
    thank yiu but i'm scared to PM anybody now. :cry2:
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    (Original post by Pathway)
    thank yiu but i'm scared to PM anybody now. :cry2:
    Ok, the offer is there if you change your mind.

    Could you try taking a bath or maybe watch a favorite tv show on the internet? Sorry if those ideas suck. Maybe just going to bed might be the best option if you can manage to sleep. :hugs:
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Ok, the offer is there if you change your mind.

    Could you try taking a bath or maybe watch a favorite tv show on the internet? Sorry if those ideas suck. Maybe just going to bed might be the best option if you can manage to sleep. :hugs:
    Just worried aobout triggering you (anybody for that matter).

    thank you for the ideas. and i do want to sleep but im scared.
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    (Original post by Pathway)
    Just worried aobout triggering you (anybody for that matter).

    thank you for the ideas. and i do want to sleep but im scared.
    :jumphug: Hope you're ok Sorry I ran away earlier, still haven't slept anyway so should've just stayed talking to you

    Big hugs TLG and anyone else that needs them too :grouphugs:
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    I woke up feeling really crap! :sad: I have this feeling of loneliness again :cry2:
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    (Original post by IDukem)
    I woke up feeling really crap! :sad: I have this feeling of loneliness again :cry2:
    :hugs:
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    (Original post by Pathway)
    :hugs:
    Thank you! :hugs: I feel like something needs to change in my life, I just can't pin-point what yet

    How are you feeling Pathway? :hugs:
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    (Original post by IDukem)
    I woke up feeling really crap! :sad: I have this feeling of loneliness again :cry2:
    :console: I feel like this nearly all the time! Sucks eh :hugs:
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    (Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
    :console: I feel like this nearly all the time! Sucks eh :hugs:
    Awwww CCBB :hugs: I'm sorry to hear that lovely! Unfortunately it does suck, which means facing an uphill battle to rag myself out of this mood...if I can get tout f this mood :hugs:
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    Not been feeling too bad this weekend

    Hopefully this carries through the next 2 weeks so I can finally start to get some revision done.
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    (Original post by Maid Marian)
    :cry:

    I just want to disappear into nothingness. I feel so alone and unloved and forgotten, my heart hurts. I want shop friend to message me back, i need him. Im so alone:cry:
    This is how I feel 90% of the time and it sucks
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    Ugh. Was meant to go to an activity this morning and after not sleeping most of last night I slept in and missed it.

    It is taking me so long to rebuild my confidence after my last big episode. I don't remember it being like this before.

    I thought getting back to work was the answer but I am realising it isn't. I am in a new city and need to go out and make friends but I am struggling to find the drive and confidence.

    I also have totally lost my bottle with women. I don't want to be alone but at the same time I just feel inferior and I also really don't like what I see in the mirror these days. In the lost couple of years, the stress of illness has taken its toll and I have lost my hair, lost muscle tone and my face has aged beyond my years. I was never like a male model but I was reasonably good looking but now I look like a skinny bald skaghead. The wierd thing is that at this stage of life, looks aren't the most important thing to me but I guess it bothers me because I know they are still important to most and it just means I feel deficient in every area.

    I don't have much banter and am just a stuttering prick, slowly turning into a loner and a wierd bachelor boy.
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    (Original post by Jay84)
    Ugh. Was meant to go to an activity this morning and after not sleeping most of last night I slept in and missed it.

    It is taking me so long to rebuild my confidence after my last big episode. I don't remember it being like this before.

    I thought getting back to work was the answer but I am realising it isn't. I am in a new city and need to go out and make friends but I am struggling to find the drive and confidence.

    I also have totally lost my bottle with women. I don't want to be alone but at the same time I just feel inferior and I also really don't like what I see in the mirror these days. In the lost couple of years, the stress of illness has taken its toll and I have lost my hair, lost muscle tone and my face has aged beyond my years. I was never like a male model but I was reasonably good looking but now I look like a skinny bald skaghead. The wierd thing is that at this stage of life, looks aren't the most important thing to me but I guess it bothers me because I know they are still important to most and it just means I feel deficient in every area.

    I don't have much banter and am just a stuttering prick, slowly turning into a loner and a wierd bachelor boy.
    Sorry to hear about your episode. I can understand, After mine I thought I might be alright going back to University, but had to take a year off to recover when it all begin. Luckily they are very understanding, but what about your workplace?

    Must be hard starting all over again. I also have experience (lots of) starting in a new place, and it can be hard to start socialising again when you have to find the right people all over again. My motivation and confidence took a hit when I was first diagnosed with psychosis. I had two episodes close together, and ended up for both times in a ward. This isn't important but I know how hard it is to get back your motivation and confidence, but it is entirely worth it when you do. I couldn't even go outside at one time, but now I am free and happy too so far anyway. Remember this is just a feeling and feelings change, its not forever.

    As for the rest I can't really say much about. I haven't much experience with men, but I do have experience with not liking my image. Everyone feels this one way or another, I hate this feeling. However, things change, and it just adds to your charm. Don't let it get to you, sometimes we tend to overthink what others may perceive about us. Get to know them first, that way you know what they feel about you. Also the people this only counts to are the ones you care about the most, only think about these people. If you need to know how people perceive you, just think about how the people close to you perceive you. Always works with me, because these people are the people that I want to notice me and they do notice me the most. So take their opinions when your own isn't making you feel what you want to feel about yourself.

    I hope this helps. Also, I would prefer small amounts of a good conversation than loads of random thoughtless sentences, don't know about anyone else?
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    (Original post by XDKeriDX)
    Sorry to hear about your episode. I can understand, After mine I thought I might be alright going back to University, but had to take a year off to recover when it all begin. Luckily they are very understanding, but what about your workplace?
    How's it going now? Did you go back after the year out? My work know nothing about my mental illness. I got the job after over a year of unemployment and hospitalizations so I was too afraid to tell anyone when applying. The job centre advised me to try and hide it too.

    Must be hard starting all over again. I also have experience (lots of) starting in a new place, and it can be hard to start socialising again when you have to find the right people all over again.
    Yeah, I have done it a few times before but just never really struggled as much to be honest.

    My motivation and confidence took a hit when I was first diagnosed with psychosis. I had two episodes close together, and ended up for both times in a ward. This isn't important but I know how hard it is to get back your motivation and confidence, but it is entirely worth it when you do. I couldn't even go outside at one time, but now I am free and happy too so far anyway. Remember this is just a feeling and feelings change, its not forever.
    Yeah, I see what you are saying. Its kinda new to me because previously I have bounced back but maybe now I am just tired of myself and am more attracted to stability and feeling like I have a life than being excited about making a new one.

    As for the rest I can't really say much about. I haven't much experience with men, but I do have experience with not liking my image. Everyone feels this one way or another, I hate this feeling. However, things change, and it just adds to your charm. Don't let it get to you, sometimes we tend to overthink what others may perceive about us. Get to know them first, that way you know what they feel about you. Also the people this only counts to are the ones you care about the most, only think about these people. If you need to know how people perceive you, just think about how the people close to you perceive you. Always works with me, because these people are the people that I want to notice me and they do notice me the most. So take their opinions when your own isn't making you feel what you want to feel about yourself.
    I havr the perspective and everything and I know I'm not hideous just a bit self conscious of the damage I've done to my body. I suppose I worry that I look ill. Mainly looks don't bother me - I think it is more feeling charmless, mentally tired and all that that bothers me. I feel all I have to offer is baggage and struggle to get the drive to go and make friends and I suppose what makes it harder is that I feel beneath everyone. I am just not with it anymore, I am more like the washed up drifter uncle.

    I hope this helps. Also, I would prefer small amounts of a good conversation than loads of random thoughtless sentences, don't know about anyone else?
    Yeah, thanks, it was sweet of you to reply to my self pitying rant. And I agree, I am not seeking loads of friends or to be in a trendy social group, I just want one or two friends to hang with and talk about things and a girlfriend for companionship. I've never been single for a year for over ten years so I guess I am just used to being with someone and having that partnership.



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    (Original post by Jay84)
    How's it going now? Did you go back after the year out? My work know nothing about my mental illness. I got the job after over a year of unemployment and hospitalizations so I was too afraid to tell anyone when applying. The job centre advised me to try and hide it too.
    I was only supposed to be taking half a year off, but ended up extending it. I am still in this extension, but have to repeat my second year stuff, because it was near the end of the semester when I began to get the symptoms. I thought it was normal at first, which now just seems silly. I actually thought it was compulsory to tell them about mental illness, but I am glad it isn't. I don't like it on my CV because I know that most are going to read and not employ me because of it. I will keep that in mind when I apply for summer work. However, my university on the other hand are very understanding so I am lucky there, but I guess workplaces are a lot different. I hope though everything works out in the end.

    (Original post by Jay84)
    Yeah, I see what you are saying. Its kinda new to me because previously I have bounced back but maybe now I am just tired of myself and am more attracted to stability and feeling like I have a life than being excited about making a new one.
    Although I am great at adapting to my new environment, its always sweeter when everything is in place. I also hope that you find your stability quickly and comfortably.

    (Original post by Jay84)
    I havr the perspective and everything and I know I'm not hideous just a bit self conscious of the damage I've done to my body. I suppose I worry that I look ill. Mainly looks don't bother me - I think it is more feeling charmless, mentally tired and all that that bothers me. I feel all I have to offer is baggage and struggle to get the drive to go and make friends and I suppose what makes it harder is that I feel beneath everyone. I am just not with it anymore, I am more like the washed up drifter uncle.
    When looking ill your family and friends will always tell you, especially when your mentally ill. Actually though, I have found that everyone asks me if I am okay anyway, but they will tell me if its because I look ill or pale and thats why they asked.

    (Original post by Jay84)
    Yeah, thanks, it was sweet of you to reply to my self pitying rant. And I agree, I am not seeking loads of friends or to be in a trendy social group, I just want one or two friends to hang with and talk about things and a girlfriend for companionship. I've never been single for a year for over ten years so I guess I am just used to being with someone and having that partnership.
    Your welcome. Rants are always a good outlet I have found. I have been single for over four years now (24), but I haven't really tried and have gotten used to it. I wish I wasn't now so I'm going to get back into dating. So to both of us, good luck.

    Until then, if you ever need someone to talk too just PM me. Even if its just to pass some time on.
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    feel awful. like someone is kicking me in the stomach again, and again and again just urgh
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    Not sure why im posting tbh but sending hugs to those who need them
 
 
 
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