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    (Original post by asdfgah)
    Feels so unsafe to have a guy I really don't know in the house. Plus I've had to move out my bedroom so am on the sofa and downstairs and people keep walking past. Have work in the morning but have no idea how I'm meant to feel safe to sleep. Stupid things are getting more tempting the more tired I get. Not sure what to do other than sit with my back to the door so nobody can get in. :bawling:
    It's ok. :hugs: All guys are not inherently evil. n You're not alone in the house with him either - like you've just said, there are plenty of people walking past. You're safe there, and nothing bad's going to happen.

    (Original post by PonchoKid)
    It's all my fault, but my feelings aren't aloud to come into the situation only she's aloud to be upset. Not me, because it's me that caused everything. It's all my fault


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    Come on, you know that's *******s. :hugs: Your feelings are just as valid as hers, and if she doesn't accept that then that's her problem not yours.
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    (Original post by PonchoKid)
    It's all my fault, but my feelings aren't aloud to come into the situation only she's aloud to be upset. Not me, because it's me that caused everything. It's all my fault


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    Hey, you blame yourself too much. I don't think it is all your fault, and let's be honest, when is something the fault of only a single person? It takes two to tango, you know, in the same way it takes two to have an argument.

    I would think that your friend is just really upset that you guys aren't best friends any more and this is her way of coping, making out as if it isn't her fault at all.
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    (Original post by asdfgah)
    Feels so unsafe to have a guy I really don't know in the house. Plus I've had to move out my bedroom so am on the sofa and downstairs and people keep walking past. Have work in the morning but have no idea how I'm meant to feel safe to sleep. Stupid things are getting more tempting the more tired I get. Not sure what to do other than sit with my back to the door so nobody can get in. :bawling:
    So, how did it end, were you able to sleep fine and get to work this morning?
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    (Original post by superwolf)
    It's ok. :hugs: All guys are not inherently evil. n You're not alone in the house with him either - like you've just said, there are plenty of people walking past. You're safe there, and nothing bad's going to happen.
    Thanks, yeah, I know they're not. Makes me feel so guilty that I'm a ridiculous sexist just because I'm scared. Other people being there makes me feel sort of safer but also not really because people are **** protection against stuff when they're asleep and on a different floor of the house and I just... I dunno. I don't think I'm ever not going to be scared and hate myself and generally make everything so much harder than it needs to be.

    (Original post by danny111)
    So, how did it end, were you able to sleep fine and get to work this morning?
    Mm I did get some sleep but not a lot. At work atm. They were up early and after I heard them I couldn't sleep again. Just got one more night on the sofa and then I get my room back. Just 7.5 hours more of work and I can go home. Counting down everything feels like I'm just wishing away my life. Wish I wasn't like this.
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    (Original post by superwolf)
    Come on, you know that's *******s. :hugs: Your feelings are just as valid as hers, and if she doesn't accept that then that's her problem not yours.
    Well the entire text was all about how it was my fault, and how she was so upset about it all, and basically if I wasn't an idiot then she'd still miss me...

    (Original post by danny111)
    Hey, you blame yourself too much. I don't think it is all your fault, and let's be honest, when is something the fault of only a single person? It takes two to tango, you know, in the same way it takes two to have an argument.

    I would think that your friend is just really upset that you guys aren't best friends any more and this is her way of coping, making out as if it isn't her fault at all.
    Because everything's my fault, it really is, trust me, I mess everything up. No because I didn't talk to her, I hid in my room, I got a boyfriend, I was skins so didn't put enough money or effort into her birthday present, I didn't do this, I didn't do that...
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    My parents keep mentioning my weight every time they see me. Today they were calling me fat and how all my clothes looked disgusting on me, but at least 'when you lose the weight your arms will be thinner'. Like they're just EXPECTING me to lose weight, when tbh I have lost the discipline or will to commit myself right now. My self esteem is pretty much rock bottom as it is, without my own parents calling me fat and making me feel uncomfortable about my weight. I see them looking me up and down and I hate it. I know I've put on a lot of weight recently and am at my heaviest at the moment, I know I'm big. But I don't need them to tell me.
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    Really struggling today feeling really low, and sticking to my boyfriend like glue. Also jumping at every creak I hear

    Don't understand any of my thought processes so confused. Even panicked earlier because we'd been locked in the house


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    Can just feel that I'm going to flashback at some point. There is no ok time anywhere in the near future ever. Have a hospital appointment tomorrow and I don't have a clue what they would do. I don't know if I'm going to be able to go because I'm scared they wouldn't know how to deal with it and would just freak them out. Urghurghurgh. Feel sick.
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    So I'm definitely getting a new, female psychiatrist :awesome: :yay: :woo: She just hasn't written to me yet

    Venlafaxine has been increased again :banana:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    So I'm definitely getting a new, female psychiatrist :awesome: :yay: :woo: She just hasn't written to me yet

    Venlafaxine has been increased again :banana:
    That's awesome!

    Out of curiosity, why did you want a female?
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    (Original post by Noodlzzz)
    That's awesome!

    Out of curiosity, why did you want a female?
    I have a natural, deeply ingrained distrust/slight fear of men :o: So even though my psychiatrist was very nice and listened to me, etc. I never trusted him. To the point where, when psychotic, I'd have to take someone into appointments with me coz I felt scared :facepalm:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    I have a natural, deeply ingrained distrust/slight fear of men :o: So even though my psychiatrist was very nice and listened to me, etc. I never trusted him. To the point where, when psychotic, I'd have to take someone into appointments with me coz I felt scared :facepalm:
    That makes sense
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    (Original post by Noodlzzz)
    That makes sense
    Thing is, I don't know why I have such a problem with men. I mean sure, the men I came across in uni scarred me quite badly but before that the only guy in my life was my dad. And whilst he comes with problems, I'd never been consciously scared of him or anything.

    I blame my mother and her general hysteria :p:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    Thing is, I don't know why I have such a problem with men. I mean sure, the men I came across in uni scarred me quite badly but before that the only guy in my life was my dad. And whilst he comes with problems, I'd never been consciously scared of him or anything.

    I blame my mother and her general hysteria :p:
    There may not be a clear trigger and even if there isn't one there's nothing wrong with having a preference to who you see.
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    (Original post by Noodlzzz)
    There may not be a clear trigger and even if there isn't one there's nothing wrong with having a preference to who you see.
    Wise words, young Noodlzzz! :hugs:

    Totally not getting this new psych coz I threw a hissy fit or anything. Just saying :flute:

    :ninja:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    Wise words, young Noodlzzz! :hugs:

    Totally not getting this new psych coz I threw a hissy fit or anything. Just saying :flute:

    :ninja:
    ha, what happened?
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    (Original post by Noodlzzz)
    ha, what happened?
    Well my now ex-psychiatrist was like "Oh, you can just go back to your GP" and I was like :lolwut: :confused: :nope: and then talked him into giving me this new psychiatrist. He was all like "but you're fine without help!" and I was like "that's what YOU think" :nothing:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    Well my now ex-psychiatrist was like "Oh, you can just go back to your GP" and I was like :lolwut: :confused: :nope: and then talked him into giving me this new psychiatrist. He was all like "but you're fine without help!" and I was like "that's what YOU think" :nothing:
    Ah I see. From what you wrote a couple of weeks ago things seemed to be slipping? Why did he think you'd be ok without help? Hmm.
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    Gahhhh d day tomorrow. Scared isn't even the word anymore. Filled in the questionnaires when I was at a low point last night, which probably wasn't my best plan, but then again it's probably more accurat :dontknow:


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    (Original post by Noodlzzz)
    Ah I see. From what you wrote a couple of weeks ago things seemed to be slipping? Why did he think you'd be ok without help? Hmm.
    Yeah. He's nice but um, a bit of a dipstick. "a bit" being the diplomatic way of putting it He used to be really on the ball. Then he just decided that everything was my personality or low self-esteem. I found it quite frustrating. The fact I have low self-esteem voices doesn't negate the fact I hear psychotic voices. Silly man :huff:
 
 
 
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