Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
x Turn on thread page Beta

Leaving Islam/ telling my family I'm athiest? watch

Announcements
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Rat_Bag)
    A great many Muslims find a great many things offensive (from teddy bears and Bibles, to uncovered female heads and drawings of people). Therefore the only solution is just to ignore them when "I'm offended" bleating starts.
    Are you speaking english?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Plantagenet Crown)
    Why not? If that's the decision she's come to then she's perfectly entitled to do that. And she's already said she's atheist, so trying to convert her back is probably in vain.



    Most people don't actively choose their religion, they're brought up believing it. It's no accident that the overwhelming majority of religious people share the same religion as their parents. And how do you know the OP hasn't done this already and still come to the conclusion that Islam is false?



    Indeed it is and she has already specified that she doesn't believe in Islam.



    You've just accused the majority of the world's religious population of being non-religious!



    No, you don't. There's something called atheism buddy, which means you lack a belief in any kind of deity or supernatural creator.



    No it isn't. If someone sees no evidence for God and decides to become an atheist then that is perfectly rational and not lazy or ridiculous in the slightest.



    This is clearly a load of made up nonsense. People don't become atheist for the reasons you've listed, you're just inventing garbage to try and make her feel bad about leaving Islam. Well it's probably not going to work



    Here we go with the "atheists are evil, selfish creatures with no moral code" argument. Boring.



    Completely and utterly untrue. You can create your own purpose in life, atheists don't need a celestial bully to make one up for them, just like children make their own way in the world and don't need their parents to define their life path for them.

    If anything an atheist is likely to make the most of life because they feel it's the only one they'll ever get and can't afford to take it somewhat for granted expecting that they'll continue to exist after death.

    Tbh, believing that the purpose of life is set by God and that you have no choice but to follow it is what's depressing in my opinion.



    No divine purpose, no. But as mentioned, you can create your own.



    What a disingenuous poster you are. First off, atheists are just as capable as being good and making other people happy. And being religious doesn't guarantee you'll be a good person. In case you hadn't noticed, people who believe in God still murder and rape and commit crimes. In fact, considering most people in the world are religious, most "evil" actions are committed by them.



    You don't need religion to do this and this has absolutely no bearing on whether or not God exists.



    No you're not, this is just Pascal's Wager which is immensely flawed. There have been hundreds of gods in history so even if you're a muslim and the real god is Odin then you're also going to hell. Believing in God makes you no more likely to be right.



    I guess that means she shouldn't listen to a single word you've said then, as you're a "random stranger"



    Nice. Because telling someone you don't give a **** about them is really going to make them more likely to take your advice! :top:

    Virtually everything you've written is self-righteous, fallacious bollox, and the OP doesn't deserve to be subjected to it.
    OP has just stated that she does not want to leave Islam. Pay attention for God sake 😑
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Synchyst)
    Are you speaking english?
    Yes
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Salx.x)
    I come from a fairly liberal Muslim family in London. I don't wear Hijab and I don't pray. My family aren't bad people, but they really do have high expectations for me. My mum says everyday that she knows I'll be great and that she prays everyday that I'll be successful. My siblings are more the issue though, they also have high expectations and have recently become more practising. I know I should wait till I'm old enough to move out (I'm still in school), but it's been a few weeks since I've come to realise of my atheism and I'm already going crazy. I have studied Islam in depth and there's many things I believe are wrong and disagree with. I'm going to ask you not to post any Qur'an verses, even though I know someone will. What can I do to prepare myself to tell them I'm atheist? And how should I tell them? I can already see what my life is going to be if I don't leave Islam soon. I'll only carry on living my miserable life, doing things I don't believe and passing those beliefs to my children who'll have to live the miserable life I did. I respect Islam and Muslims, but I really do have strong views about things on the dark side of religion that everyone seems to overlook. I got into a really heated argument once with a friend who said that being gay is a choice because it says that nobody is born gay in the Quran. I have my own morals and I don't need religion to keep me in place.
    Has anyone else ever left Islam, and if so how did your family react?
    ------------------------------------------
    40 years ago, I was 12 years old. I decided one summer to study the quran and become religious because, I thought to myself, if it's true, I need to do it properly.
    I spoke Arabic and my language skills in reading and writing were very good even at that early age. Three months into reading the quran showed sides that my monogamist, then secular society didn't approve of; such as the status that God gave to men over women, the legalisation of beating wives/children and the law of inheritance. All these made me question the fairness, and therefore the goodness of God, and I then decided either God was not good or He didn't exist. With a guiltless mind, I told everyone my little discovery and to my parents' relieve never wore the Islamic 'uniform' they dreaded.
    More than 20 years later, I converted to Christianity and got to know God and the spiritual realm better.
    Looking back at my experience of atheism I realised that by walking away from God, I stripped my self of my then only opportunity to grow and mature as a person. I also opened myself wide to the negative forces of the unseen. In the same year and probably even month that I have decided to become an unbeliever, I was plagued with epilepsy for about 10 years. Brain scans cleared me of any known cause and therefore I was unable to take treatment for it and I was left to wrestle with shame, fear and dread of being exposed during the next fit. However I have never thought that godlessness was the cause of my predicament.
    My life went from bad to worst since I rebelled against God. I don't believe God was punishing me, but He certainly wasn't my helper because I rejected His help.
    What I'm saying is; even though you don't like some sides in Islam that may make the religion seem barbaric and even satanic, it is still better to stick to it rather than to become an atheist. Why? Because atheism is dogmatic, full of pride and ignorance. Modern physics shows very well the bankruptcy of this way of thinking and its serious repercussion. You don't have to become O.B.Laden but you can certainly follow the wonderful example of Rabaa Al-Adawia whose faith transcended Islam and the barrier of religion.
    God bless you
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    You are at risk from getting attacked, evidence for leaving Islam has poor results
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Synchyst)
    OP has just stated that she does not want to leave Islam. Pay attention for God sake 😑
    No she didn't, seems like it's you who has to pay more attention to her OP.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Muhammad Shehzar)
    An athiest is the one who does not believe in gods.. u r quite small now for making such a big decision. I would recommend u to understand the verses of Quraan.. & ask for guidance from Aalims(islamic scholars).. Th age at which u r now is the age of getting misleaded or u cant understand what is ri8 and what is wrong.. before doing anything just think of the AZAAB from Allah to the people who didnot follow Allah..
    I absolutely agree with you Mister...She needs to understand what kind of blessing she has (being in an Islamic Family/environment)Insh Allah The Almighty will guide her
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Khalifa001)
    I absolutely agree with you Mister...She needs to understand what kind of blessing she has (being in an Islamic Family/environment)Insh Allah The Almighty will guide her
    To you lot it might be a blessing, not to everyone. I have a couple of apostate family members and friends but many are still Muslims and I want them to stay that way because it makes them happy. Similarly I wish that some Muslims would just accept the choices of ex-Muslims and realise that Islam wasn't for us. I never felt that it was a blessing and it only left me in a state of conflict and unhappiness. If the OP was a non-Muslim, would you say she was too young to make the decision to accept Islam? If not then this is double standards.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Salx.x)
    I come from a fairly liberal Muslim family in London. I don't wear Hijab and I don't pray. My family aren't bad people, but they really do have high expectations for me. My mum says everyday that she knows I'll be great and that she prays everyday that I'll be successful. My siblings are more the issue though, they also have high expectations and have recently become more practising. I know I should wait till I'm old enough to move out (I'm still in school), but it's been a few weeks since I've come to realise of my atheism and I'm already going crazy. I have studied Islam in depth and there's many things I believe are wrong and disagree with. I'm going to ask you not to post any Qur'an verses, even though I know someone will. What can I do to prepare myself to tell them I'm atheist? And how should I tell them? I can already see what my life is going to be if I don't leave Islam soon. I'll only carry on living my miserable life, doing things I don't believe and passing those beliefs to my children who'll have to live the miserable life I did. I respect Islam and Muslims, but I really do have strong views about things on the dark side of religion that everyone seems to overlook. I got into a really heated argument once with a friend who said that being gay is a choice because it says that nobody is born gay in the Quran. I have my own morals and I don't need religion to keep me in place.
    Has anyone else ever left Islam, and if so how did your family react?
    Im from a hindu family and came out as an atheist when I was about 11. You said that there was a few things you disagreed with islam. You got to ask yourself if you are actually or an atheist or looking for a different label. Whether youre an atheist or not has no relevance to how you feel about islam. Aslo you got to work out if coming out to you're parents will impact your relationship. I say its worth while coming out when youre older or your parents will not truly understand what youre going through and how you feel. You might change your mind when your older and your parents are more likely to respect your decision. Good luck!
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Salx.x)
    I come from a fairly liberal Muslim family in London. I don't wear Hijab and I don't pray. My family aren't bad people, but they really do have high expectations for me. My mum says everyday that she knows I'll be great and that she prays everyday that I'll be successful. My siblings are more the issue though, they also have high expectations and have recently become more practising. I know I should wait till I'm old enough to move out (I'm still in school), but it's been a few weeks since I've come to realise of my atheism and I'm already going crazy. I have studied Islam in depth and there's many things I believe are wrong and disagree with. I'm going to ask you not to post any Qur'an verses, even though I know someone will. What can I do to prepare myself to tell them I'm atheist? And how should I tell them? I can already see what my life is going to be if I don't leave Islam soon. I'll only carry on living my miserable life, doing things I don't believe and passing those beliefs to my children who'll have to live the miserable life I did. I respect Islam and Muslims, but I really do have strong views about things on the dark side of religion that everyone seems to overlook. I got into a really heated argument once with a friend who said that being gay is a choice because it says that nobody is born gay in the Quran. I have my own morals and I don't need religion to keep me in place.
    Has anyone else ever left Islam, and if so how did your family react?
    Well, I haven't lived in a Muslim family but I do live in a very strongly christian family. I've been in the same or in a similar situation to you, I'm an atheist in a family of super-religious nutjobs. I guess I've got it double though since I'm asexual. I've had to go through the "mum this is why you're not getting grandkids" conversation and the "mum, I'm atheist stop dragging me to church every Sunday" one.

    My parents flipped when I told them both of these things. They calmed down eventually, but they're still in denial about my asexuality. I'm well aware that they disapprove of me being an atheist, but that doesn't matter at all. I'm feeling so much better than before because it means I don't have to live a lie. I really recommend that you do the same, not only to your family but also to your friends. I'm not going to lie; it'll drive wedges between you and some of them and it's really hard to do at first, but it's well worth it in the end.

    What the extremists like to forget is that nothing matters more than being happy. Your friends and family should value your happiness far more than whether you're religious or not. If they don't then it only goes to show how shallow they are. While it hurts to be rejected by family and friends, it's also a blessing in disguise as it separates people who really care about you from those who don't. The thing to remember is that if someone is unwilling to accept you for who you are then they are unworthy of even speaking your name.

    That even goes for siblings and parents. If they cast you out, just let them go. If you don't they'll just keep clawing at you to drag you down to their level. Besides, a parent should always prioritize their child's happiness. Any parent who doesn't, doesn't deserve the respect of their children.
    Offline

    2
    If she's an atheist, why should she convert to another religion?
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Muhammad Shehzar)
    I m not judging anyone.. and I agree with ur comment that non-muslims can go to jannah but only if Allah orders.. & about ur second point, I would say that this the sign of qyamat..
    http://www.answering-islam.org/Shamoun/antagonizing.htm
    http://www.thereligionofpeace.com/pa...on-medina.aspx
    http://www.thereligionofpeace.com/pa...hudaibiya.aspx
    http://www.thereligionofpeace.com/pa...peace-war.aspx
    http://www.thereligionofpeace.com/pa...ion-polls.aspx
    https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=...eccans&f=false
    http://legacy.fordham.edu/halsall/med/crone.asp

    Just thought I should put some actual history in here... We don't want apologists spreading more lies. For those of you who are wondering, this is why some people choose to leave Islam.
    Offline

    0
    I'm an atheist as well and have been since I was fifteen after disagreeing with what I was taught in mosque and from my religious family. I'm nineteen now and haven't told them anything about my beliefs and just act along with them. I think the main advice I can give you is not to tell them, only because most religious people, especially when they are members of your own family will not be so understanding of your opinion and will perhaps become hostile and defensive. You and I know your opinions and beliefs won't change to suit your parents, so just wait till you move out and have begun living independently before voicing your opinions. It's just better that way and hassle free.


    Posted from TSR Mobile
 
 
 
Poll
Do you agree with the proposed ban on plastic straws and cotton buds?
Useful resources

Groups associated with this forum:

View associated groups

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.