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    (Original post by Delain)
    Cheers, I'll have to have some tea. Coffee doesn't agree with me.
    hope it helped!

    ----

    just had my CMHT appointment, which was okay but they asked me what "do I enjoy doing", which I kinda panicked at as I don't really do much then I ended up thinking about school and how most people do things there but I didn't, I just hid away from people in the library on my own now all the memories of that are coming back and I feel so pathetic and sad, urgh.
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    hope it helped!

    ----

    just had my CMHT appointment, which was okay but they asked me what "do I enjoy doing", which I kinda panicked at as I don't really do much then I ended up thinking about school and how most people do things there but I didn't, I just hid away from people in the library on my own now all the memories of that are coming back and I feel so pathetic and sad, urgh.
    Somewhat I guess. Usually I can stay up for ages but soon as I need to do something then I just want to sleep. It sucks.

    I know how you feel with respect to that, people are always asking me "what have you been up to" or if I have plans or that sort of thing and I really feel ****ty because I can't really answer that. The CMHT won't judge you, they will understand.
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    hope it helped!

    ----

    just had my CMHT appointment, which was okay but they asked me what "do I enjoy doing", which I kinda panicked at as I don't really do much then I ended up thinking about school and how most people do things there but I didn't, I just hid away from people in the library on my own now all the memories of that are coming back and I feel so pathetic and sad, urgh.
    I don't like that, I was asked that the other day and panicked also. I had a terrible time at school and was on my own all the time, I was bullied severely so I get what you're on about
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    So the paperwork is all organised for tomorrow.. Everything's been signed and cleared off by the senior consultants.. I cannae wait! :yep: hoping its a sunny day... May go shopping or down to the beach for the day (if its nice weather!) with my family and just chill! Hopefully I get to come home for a few hours so I can use a proper laptop to reply back to people properly!





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    (Original post by Delain)
    Somewhat I guess. Usually I can stay up for ages but soon as I need to do something then I just want to sleep. It sucks.

    I know how you feel with respect to that, people are always asking me "what have you been up to" or if I have plans or that sort of thing and I really feel ****ty because I can't really answer that. The CMHT won't judge you, they will understand.
    ah okay, that sounds annoying! hopefully the tea does the trick though!

    yeah, the question just took me off guard a bit, I didn't really have an answer so I guess I just looked to why I didn't, they were nice about it and stuff, I just feel pretty **** that something simple that most people can answer without thinking, takes me ages to reply to and even then it just brings back memories that make me want to cry :cry2: I almost cried in the appointment when I was talking about it, just makes me feel so pathetic
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    ah okay, that sounds annoying! hopefully the tea does the trick though!

    yeah, the question just took me off guard a bit, I didn't really have an answer so I guess I just looked to why I didn't, they were nice about it and stuff, I just feel pretty **** that something simple that most people can answer without thinking, takes me ages to reply to and even then it just brings back memories that make me want to cry :cry2: I almost cried in the appointment when I was talking about it, just makes me feel so pathetic
    You're not pathetic at all. I can understand you feel **** about it, it will take time but one day you will get to a point where you can answer it. :hugs:
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    I don't like that, I was asked that the other day and panicked also. I had a terrible time at school and was on my own all the time, I was bullied severely so I get what you're on about
    it's awful everytime people talk about school and I just know they will ask me, I have to just sit there and say "yeah no I didn't have any friends", "no I didn't do anything", "no I wasn't in any clubs", "no I didn't do anything like that"
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    it's awful everytime people talk about school and I just know they will ask me, I have to just sit there and say "yeah no I didn't have any friends", "no I didn't do anything", "no I wasn't in any clubs", "no I didn't do anything like that"
    Exactly. I find it awkward when new friends say things like "oh bring your old friends along!" I'm just there thinking what friends? I had one friend in school and even he ****ed me over in the end. Schools are bad places aren't they :cry2:
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    Clubs and things aren't for everyone. I've never really been in any either. People seem to ask constantly about clubs and jobs and plans and all of that crap because they have this overwhelming need to categorise others and fit them into pigeon holes. It really pisses me off.
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    (Original post by Delain)
    You're not pathetic at all. I can understand you feel **** about it, it will take time but one day you will get to a point where you can answer it. :hugs:
    I don't know if I will though, im 24 now and I still don't "do" anything, I live, that's about it, im still pretty lonely, the only person I see really is my girlfriend, who is amazing, but it feels kinda awkward still that I don't have anyone else im about to have to quit Uni for a 2nd time with no idea what to do next and it all just feels so much, I really dont know how to cope or survive as a person at all really, in many ways I think im still just that lost 13 year old kid hiding in the back of the library hoping break never ends or that I can go home early just to avoid the cruel rechidness of life.
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    I don't know if I will though, im 24 now and I still don't "do" anything, I live, that's about it, im still pretty lonely, the only person I see really is my girlfriend, who is amazing, but it feels kinda awkward still that I don't have anyone else im about to have to quit Uni for a 2nd time with no idea what to do next and it all just feels so much, I really dont know how to cope or survive as a person at all really, in many ways I think im still just that lost 13 year old kid hiding in the back of the library hoping break never ends or that I can go home early just to avoid the cruel rechidness of life.
    I completely get what you mean. I could pretty much write that post myself - I only spend time with my fiancé, I don't have a job right now, I've dropped out of Uni three times and feel like a total **** up. All we can do is try and think okay, this is what has happened but it doesn't define my whole life. The future hasn't happened yet and there is the potential that things will change. You're getting help and you have all of us to support you so you have more people than just your girlfriend.
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Exactly. I find it awkward when new friends say things like "oh bring your old friends along!" I'm just there thinking what friends? I had one friend in school and even he ****ed me over in the end. Schools are bad places aren't they :cry2:
    people always ask me about friends and stuff, I just talk about my friend who I made outside of school a bit, not really anything else I can talk about, when people ask about school I find it hard not to cry just thinking about it, people can probably tell cause I just kind of mumble about not having had friends and stuff and look sad, I just wish the whole thing never happened tbh.

    (Original post by Delain)
    Clubs and things aren't for everyone. I've never really been in any either. People seem to ask constantly about clubs and jobs and plans and all of that crap because they have this overwhelming need to categorise others and fit them into pigeon holes. It really pisses me off.
    they do yeah, people always ask me about what I did at school just like if I was in clubs or what I did with friends, feels so awkward to have to say I wasn't in any and I didn't have any friends, they just look at me like im weird half the time, I think a lot of people just assume I must be **** or something to have not had friends
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    (Original post by Delain)
    I completely get what you mean. I could pretty much write that post myself - I only spend time with my fiancé, I don't have a job right now, I've dropped out of Uni three times and feel like a total **** up. All we can do is try and think okay, this is what has happened but it doesn't define my whole life. The future hasn't happened yet and there is the potential that things will change. You're getting help and you have all of us to support you so you have more people than just your girlfriend.
    my girlfriends the only person who can make me happy right now, before her I didn't even have that, I just hope she knows how much she means to me, would be utterly lost without her! the future just scares me right now, so much unknown and so many questions I have to answer but can't people in this thread have always been amazing to me, I really appreciate it, I just wish I could be stronger and cope better and stuff so I can actually do things to make people think im worth supporting I guess :/
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    people always ask me about friends and stuff, I just talk about my friend who I made outside of school a bit, not really anything else I can talk about, when people ask about school I find it hard not to cry just thinking about it, people can probably tell cause I just kind of mumble about not having had friends and stuff and look sad, I just wish the whole thing never happened tbh.
    Me too, it was horrible. Wish people wouldn't ask about it. I always try and change the subject but people probably realise. My school was **** though, which didn't help at all.
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    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Me too, it was horrible. Wish people wouldn't ask about it. I always try and change the subject but people probably realise. My school was **** though, which didn't help at all.
    annoyingly it seems to be how a lot of people think is best to get to know you to ask about it, especially at Uni! sorry to hear your school was ****, mine was for me as well but ironically get amazing reviews from ofsted :rolleyes:
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    My school was **** too, hated it. I was so glad when I left. Awful people and the teachers were ***** too.
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    my girlfriends the only person who can make me happy right now, before her I didn't even have that, I just hope she knows how much she means to me, would be utterly lost without her! the future just scares me right now, so much unknown and so many questions I have to answer but can't people in this thread have always been amazing to me, I really appreciate it, I just wish I could be stronger and cope better and stuff so I can actually do things to make people think im worth supporting I guess :/
    Well I think you are worth supporting, if it means anything. I'm glad you've got her to make you feel happy, you're very lucky to have someone who supports you so much. Yeah the future is pretty scary I totally agree with you there.
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    annoyingly it seems to be how a lot of people think is best to get to know you to ask about it, especially at Uni! sorry to hear your school was ****, mine was for me as well but ironically get amazing reviews from ofsted :rolleyes:
    Did you go to my school?! Mine was the same, middle class area full of middle class ***** and glowing ofsted reports. The teachers were vile, if you didn't get them 10000000000% on their results they didn't give a flying crap.

    Yeah I dislike that. I dropped out of uni, going back in september, going to try and make up a backstory.. :ninjagirl:
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    (Original post by Delain)
    My school was **** too, hated it. I was so glad when I left. Awful people and the teachers were ***** too.
    :hugs: a lot of schools seem to be awful for people!

    (Original post by Delain)
    Well I think you are worth supporting, if it means anything. I'm glad you've got her to make you feel happy, you're very lucky to have someone who supports you so much. Yeah the future is pretty scary I totally agree with you there.
    thank you, that's nice of you to say yeah, she's amazing, just hope I make her happy too cause she means the world to me definitely, try not to even think about the future most of the time tbh!

    (Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
    Did you go to my school?! Mine was the same, middle class area full of middle class ***** and glowing ofsted reports. The teachers were vile, if you didn't get them 10000000000% on their results they didn't give a flying crap.

    Yeah I dislike that. I dropped out of uni, going back in september, going to try and make up a backstory.. :ninjagirl:
    doubt it haha, unless you live near Bath anyway plus my school wasn't middle class lol, was just a comprehensive, got a real mix of people I guess, most of them didn't seem to like me much though :/ teachers seem to be like that in a lot of places yeah, at my school they were like that too, or in the case of one teacher they just picked on me

    good luck with going back! I intermitted and transferred last year which hasn't worked out for me so well for a number of reasons, before that I dropped out back in 2007 as well haha, really am not good at the whole Uni thing, don't really know what other options I have though (if any )
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    I feel a bit out of place here saying I really enjoyed my school. It wasn't in the best area but the pastoral side really helped me with all this mental stuff going off in my head, and I didn't come out with too bad grades or friends.
    This makes me feel slightly guilty though, are normal children with boring normal school lives allowed to go off the rails?


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