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LOng term relationship without sex! possible? Watch

    • #5
    #5

    I think some people are a being a little harsh here. It's fine not to have sex and it's good that you've made your position clear to him. I think if this is the first relationship you've been in you may change your mind - sex might seem like something totally scary now but if you're with someone you really like and are attracted to them it is going to be very difficult. I definitely don't think it's impossible because relationships are about so much more than sex. I have a fantastic relationship which has lasted 2 and a half years long distance and (because of a condition that makes sex painful for me) we don't do it that often. However, in the beginning of a relationship you will want to be physical a lot of the time- it's just how it is and that is what is going to be difficult. It will be tough on both of you but if he says he doesn't mind you may as well give it a go - you can't not get into relationships because of this or you'll never be with anyone to know that you want to marry them. Hope this helps =)
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    In response to your question, yes it is possible to have a long term relationship without sex. Mine was 2 years 7 months.
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    Yes, of course it's possible to have a long term relationship without sex - but only as long as both are totally agreed on the situation for moral reasons or otherwise.
    Personally, it wouldn't work for me - sex is an important part of relationships for me and if someone told me what you told him I wouldn't even consider a relationship with them. But if he does then congratulations you've found someone who has compatible beliefs towards sex and it'll hopefully work out.
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    (Original post by Aidin)
    Another fine example of a sensible debater....attack the poster and not the post.

    No it is not prudent to a relationship. And in terms of a biological level...you just need to be able to produce the necessary components to procreate and it's rare for someone to not be able to.
    Please explain your statement that it is not prudent to a relationship to ensure you have similar sexual needs (that you can therefore mutually satisfy). How is this anything different from assuring intellectual compatability?

    "Sexual compatibility." You are right about this indeed. BUT TELL ME, how many people do it for the hell of it/the fun of it rather than the whole evolutionary reason for doing it.
    Evolution doesn't have 'reasons', its not a targetted process. There is nothing less 'correct' about having sex for fun than there is about having sex for procreation.
    You take what I said and twisted it. I never said anything about compatibility and most of you take compatibility as if to mean enjoying it rather than compatibility in terms of procreation and the reason for life.
    Yes, by compatability I mean satisfying each others needs. In the bizarre context and meaning you are claiming is correct ("compatibility in terms of procreation and the reason for life"), a rapist is perfectly sexually compatable with every fertile woman - they can get pregnant after all.
    Too many people have relationships just for the sex...I'm sorry but that's not what is meant by sexual compatibility.
    Not "just for sex" but there is nothing wrong with sex being a key element in a relationship. For one thing, you miss out on a certain bond that, biologically, is caused by the release of seratonin and oxytocin following orgasm.
    Sexual compatibility in terms of our evolution has always been about picking a suitable mate. This always meant (subconsciously and sometimes consciously) that it would be a female suitable to carry a healthy child and a male who is strong and take care of the needs of the family and stand up to others. This is the evolution you speak of. Not silly casual sex that goes around in this modern world.
    This is hilarious. You remind me of those people who go on and on about how homosexuality is "against nature". Take your petty prejudices and fornicate elsewhere to be honest (or dont, as is very clearly your preference).

    Classic natural = moral fallacy.

    People who choose to do it after marriage have nothing wrong with them and if that can't be respected then what's the point? It most likely shows the other person just wants to have fun having sex. It's not because of the evolution argument that you used....
    You keep superimposing the word "just" in there, like there are two options, either you are a DEFENDER OF TRUTH, JUSTICE AND EVOLUTION by denying your biological urges until an arbitrary social milestone, or else you are a SEX CRAZED FIEND who is only interested in getting your filthy rocks off with the first person to come along.

    This is clearly bull**** of the worst kind. Sexual compatability (in the mutual satisfaction of needs sense that I use it) is one of several key elements of a healthy relationship (along with such things as intellectual, social and emotional compatability).

    Your puritanical views (sex should only be a mechanical act used for procreation!) are hilarious.
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    I wouldn't have a relationship with someone who wanted to wait until marriage to have sex.
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    (Original post by HistoryRepeating)
    Please explain your statement that it is not prudent to a relationship to ensure you have similar sexual needs (that you can therefore mutually satisfy). How is this anything different from assuring intellectual compatability?


    Evolution doesn't have 'reasons', its not a targetted process. There is nothing less 'correct' about having sex for fun than there is about having sex for procreation.

    Yes, by compatability I mean satisfying each others needs. In the bizarre context and meaning you are claiming is correct ("compatibility in terms of procreation and the reason for life"), a rapist is perfectly sexually compatable with every fertile woman - they can get pregnant after all.

    Not "just for sex" but there is nothing wrong with sex being a key element in a relationship. For one thing, you miss out on a certain bond that, biologically, is caused by the release of seratonin and oxytocin following orgasm.

    This is hilarious. You remind me of those people who go on and on about how homosexuality is "against nature". Take your petty prejudices and fornicate elsewhere to be honest (or dont, as is very clearly your preference).

    Classic natural = moral fallacy.


    You keep superimposing the word "just" in there, like there are two options, either you are a DEFENDER OF TRUTH, JUSTICE AND EVOLUTION by denying your biological urges until an arbitrary social milestone, or else you are a SEX CRAZED FIEND who is only interested in getting your filthy rocks off with the first person to come along.

    This is clearly bull**** of the worst kind. Sexual compatability (in the mutual satisfaction of needs sense that I use it) is one of several key elements of a healthy relationship (along with such things as intellectual, social and emotional compatability).

    Your puritanical views (sex should only be a mechanical act used for procreation!) are hilarious.
    Well played! Good to see someone who doesn’t live in the 18th century and feel the need to overpopulate the earth.

    Few today place such an extreme value on the reproductive potential of their mate. It appears that some would still divorce their mate if they were found to be sterile. You have to feel sorry for all the women of past ages that were married solely because of their perceived value as having the capability of reproduce.

    I would much rather be with a woman that I can connect with emotionally, sexually and intellectually that is sterile than be with a woman who is very fertile and a hobosexual.
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    this ain't frickin' cinderella.. give up love
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    (Original post by ily_em)
    Will you do other sexual stuff? :erm:

    If I was with somebody and they didn't want to do anything then I don't think I would want to continue with the relationship. On the other hand, if they did 'everything' apart from sex I'd also find it hard to understand why, as there isn't any less trust involved in that than with sex (arguably, oral has more trust involved than sex). I mean... 2 years?? It's a very long time!
    Respect God and yourself lol
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    (Original post by 122025278)
    Respect God and yourself lol
    I don't believe in god, but what in my post makes you believe I don't respect myself? :erm:
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    Obviously it's possible. It seems that sex is outweighing your wanting to be with her. If I had a gf and she didn't want sex it wouldn't be bothered. Seriously. So yeah it's possible. Baka.
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    Sex is important to me, but it doesn't even have to be penetrative sex to turn on a girl (and myself) if you push the right buttons. One of the best sexual experiences I had was one that involved me, my girlfriend, a lot of foreplay and a lot of melted chocolate
 
 
 
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