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I need to be in a relationship to feel complete. And I'm okay with it. Watch

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    (Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
    This is very interesting to think about. People say countless times that you shouldn't need another half to complete you - but aren't we biologically made to procreate, by nature? Therefore, it shouldn't really be bad to want someone, right?
    People in this thread don't understand the difference between feeling completed and feeling complemented (sp). We need to find someone that complements us, not one that completes us.

    By nature, we are already complete. Nature also states that men should have sex with as many women as possible - look what happened there.

    People here also need to understand the difference between need and want.

    A relationship is not a necessity towards being happy - you're not looking at a relationship for the right reasons in this case.
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    (Original post by TheRustaman)
    The only person you should ever need is yourself. Everything else, relationships included, is just an add-on...
    Exactly. There is no need to pay for Call of Duty map packs, just because everyone else does. Already bought the game ffs.
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    I think that females naturally have more of a need for relationships. Finding a stable partner to look after potential offspring would be the evolutionary reasoning, and girls are typically more emotional as well, wanting an outlet. With males the evolutionary prerogative is to spread the seed and I'd say males are more likely to string it along in the hope of getting laid.

    Personally I'm happy being single. That's not to say I don't want one, but I wouldn't force it for the sake of it if I wasn't really attracted to her. I think it's important, especially in the west where individuality seems highly prized, to develop independence. Consequently, and from having dealt with mental health problems in the past, I think I'm strong minded. If I meet someone all the better but I don't beat myself up over being single.
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    (Original post by tailschao)
    Boom, headshot.

    I'd also like to add that when you start looking for just "a relationship", as opposed to "a person", you'll probably start to try and put up with people to whom you're not really suited, purely out of fear of being alone. Then even if you realise that, you won't break up because you're scared of being alone. So you have to endure months of an unhappy relationship before the other person ends it, and, OMG NO WTF, alone again. Rinse, repeat.

    Sorry, OP, but anyone like you would make me run a mile.
    THIS +rep

    There's a world of difference between wanting a relationship and geniunely wanting to be with someone. Countless times I have seen people I know getting into relationships purely for the sake of having a boyfriend/girlfriend, which is pretty insulting to the person you're with! It's like you only really want someone because of how they make you feel, rather than actually liking them for who they are - doesn't that seem a little bit selfish?

    Personally, I wasn't unhappy alone but obviously I had needs (that's what ONS and **** buddies are for aye?). But I refused to get into a relationship purely so's I could feel "complete" because only I am responsible for my OWN happiness, I can't rely on somebody else. Neither is it fair to.

    A boyfriend/girlfriend won't complete you, and if you think that way then you're in for disappointment. A relationship doesn't solve everything.
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    So everyone's saying you should be happy by yourself. Any suggestions how to do that? In threads like this you always get people stating the end goal with no advice for how to get there.
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    (Original post by Advanced Subsidiary)
    People in this thread don't understand the difference between feeling completed and feeling complemented (sp). We need to find someone that complements us, not one that completes us.

    By nature, we are already complete. Nature also states that men should have sex with as many women as possible - look what happened there.

    People here also need to understand the difference between need and want.

    A relationship is not a necessity towards being happy - you're not looking at a relationship for the right reasons in this case.
    Very true. Good points :yy:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So everyone's saying you should be happy by yourself. Any suggestions how to do that? In threads like this you always get people stating the end goal with no advice for how to get there.
    There's no copy and paste solution. For me, it took years and it was a mix of accepting myself, forgiving past mistakes, finding out what makes me tick through friendship, hobbies, exercise, travel, meditation and a wedge of therapy. I slowly began to enjoy my own company, be proud of my achievements and contribute to the world around me.
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    My aunt always said to me, "You're young and academic and you have your whole life ahead of you. Don't feel that you need to be in a relationship, because you have so much time for that. Have fun and don't take life too seriously: a man on your arm isn't the be all and end all right now".
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    It has much to do with personality types I guess. Some people are introverted to the point that they live alone, others are extroverted that they always feel in need of companionship; whether it is friends or a partner. I don't think there is anything wrong with either choice, but one should also not go to the extremes. No one should live completely alone and actively reject companionship and people, and no one should depend on a relationship/companionship to the point that they cannot function normally without them. We are after all humans; we are individuals, but we also communicate and work well in groups.
 
 
 
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