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26 year old guy dating an 18 year old girl? Would that be wrong? Watch

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    I dont think its wierd at all if and its a big IF shes out of school. I really think its very odd a adult 26 year old man dating a school girl I just find it a bit creepy. My boyfriends only 4 years older but I met him at 18 I was on a gap year but he even said if I was still at school he wouldnt have dated me which I understand. Also you have to think at 26 what happens if at 30 you want to settle down and get married ? she will only be 22. Me and my boyfriend had the discussion that if we end up getting married illbe slightly younger than i wanted to be when i got married and he'll be slightly older than he wanted to be
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    Perhaps slightly unusual (not in a bad way- just different to the majority) but at the end of the day your both consenting adults so who cares what anyone else thinks
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    I'm 19, and my ex is 27. Neither of us noticed the age difference at all for the majority of the time.
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    Like someone else pointed out, so many girls claim to be mature. The thing is, the term 'mature' carries the implication that whatever is deemed to be so is more advanced than the majority. So if many girls claim to be mature, surely that resets the benchmark of behaviour and attitudes associated with a given age, thus rendering these 'mature' girls simply normal or only a little advanced for their age? Girls are often so obsessed with looking and acting older and I think it's sad. Immaturity is generally viewed as a bad thing and I question that. As long as a person is moral and considerate of others, there is nothing really wrong with certain types of immaturity.

    Whilst someone might be mature in one sense, they may be completely lacking in maturity in others. There are experiences that an 18 year old just won't have had. I think a lot of young women are also very good at putting on a mature act for men, but after a few weeks or months their immaturity will start to show. As for older men dating younger women, I have to say that I always wonder if the man is a bit lacking. The 18 year old female in this scenario probably isn't the best judge of a 26 year old's maturity because she is no where near that age and won't really know what sort of behaviour to expect from someone that age. He might seem older, but she won't realise how much older a 26 year old should seem to an 18 year old.
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    no, it ins't wrong. If you love her and if she loves you it doesn't matter what others think. The only thing that matters is that the both of you give yourselves a chance and stop caring of others opinions. The relationship is between you and her, not the world. if it works ,it works. If it doesn't then it doesn't. If their is a connection, go for it.
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    (Original post by WhiteWalker)
    I am just curious about your thoughts on this.

    As an extreme example, I have a cousin who is 22 and she's dating a guy who is 46 years old. They have their own place, get on great, and they've been together about 2 years.

    What do you think about 26 year old guy dating an 18 year old girl though? Would it be strange or not?
    I am SO opposed to this due to my own experience. I was 18 when I dated a 27yo guy. I was immature and just playing about, not looking for a serious relationship, but he became really serious really quickly. I think if a man is that willing to become involved with a teenager then there is something wrong with him. He can't get someone his own age or he is not mature enough to be with a woman his age. He's desperate or lonely and is taking advantage of the girl's naivety. I was obviously a little immature but when I tried to break up with him, he made me feel guilty and feel sorry for him so I gave it another chance. Then he tried to stop me from going overseas for more than a couple of months. I wanted to go for 6 months anyway and he planned to visit me twice while i was away. I tried to break up with him twice more and the last time he flipped out so much i was afraid he would harm himself if i left. I felt to pressured to stay with him to the point where he was using his relationship with my parents and our involvement in eachothers' lives as a way to guilt me into staying with him. In the end i had to break up with him via e-mail from overseas because i finally had enough distance to see clearly that i was being guilted and brainwashed.

    I think men should be able to appreciate a woman of the same maturity level. If he can't then he is with a girl for the wrong reasons.
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    Personal experience: Last year at 18, I was sort of seeing a 28 year old who was at the same uni. At the time I thought he cared about me (how naive) but it turned out that all he wanted was sex and ****ed off when he didn't get it. I guess it depends on the intentions of both people and whether the younger person is naive or not. I have friends however that are 21 with 35 year olds, 19 with 32 etc. which have worked out mainly down to the individuals involved.


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    (Original post by Ingrid<3)
    I am SO opposed to this due to my own experience. I was 18 when I dated a 27yo guy. I was immature and just playing about, not looking for a serious relationship, but he became really serious really quickly. I think if a man is that willing to become involved with a teenager then there is something wrong with him. He can't get someone his own age or he is not mature enough to be with a woman his age. He's desperate or lonely and is taking advantage of the girl's naivety. I was obviously a little immature but when I tried to break up with him, he made me feel guilty and feel sorry for him so I gave it another chance. Then he tried to stop me from going overseas for more than a couple of months. I wanted to go for 6 months anyway and he planned to visit me twice while i was away. I tried to break up with him twice more and the last time he flipped out so much i was afraid he would harm himself if i left. I felt to pressured to stay with him to the point where he was using his relationship with my parents and our involvement in eachothers' lives as a way to guilt me into staying with him. In the end i had to break up with him via e-mail from overseas because i finally had enough distance to see clearly that i was being guilted and brainwashed.

    I think men should be able to appreciate a woman of the same maturity level. If he can't then he is with a girl for the wrong reasons.
    Everything else aside I can't disagree with you more on one of your points. A 26 year old doesn't necessarily go for an 18 year old because he can't get women his own age. He may do it because 18 year olds are more attractive to him than 26 year olds (I generally don't find women over the age of about 30-35 attractive, for example, hoping that will chance as I get older though ), or because he isn't looking for women who are mature because, let's face it, mature people aren't as 'fun' as immature people. My point is that it isn't always because he can't get women his own age, but rather he just prefers younger women. I'm 21 and I would have absolutely no interest in dating someone much older than me because I'm just not interested in that level of intensity in a relationship. I wouldn't have a problem dating someone younger than me, say 19. It's completely true, however, that it's a problem when older guys try to go for an intense, mature relationship with someone who isn't old enough to be in one, and you have to question whether they are projecting some kind of issues to do with wanting to relive their youth or something. My thoughts anyway.
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    Prince Charles was 31 when Diana was 18; they got married when she was 20.
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    I don't think it's strange at all. You can all harp on about how "they'll want different things" and "they're at different places in life", but that is true of many couples, irrespective of any age difference (or lack thereof).

    Some 26 year olds act younger. Some 18 year olds are very mature. Whether a relationship might work successfully all depends on the individuals but I don't think their age alone is a factor at all.
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    (Original post by Wahrheit)
    Everything else aside I can't disagree with you more on one of your points. A 26 year old doesn't necessarily go for an 18 year old because he can't get women his own age. He may do it because 18 year olds are more attractive to him than 26 year olds (I generally don't find women over the age of about 30-35 attractive, for example, hoping that will chance as I get older though ), or because he isn't looking for women who are mature because, let's face it, mature people aren't as 'fun' as immature people. My point is that it isn't always because he can't get women his own age, but rather he just prefers younger women. I'm 21 and I would have absolutely no interest in dating someone much older than me because I'm just not interested in that level of intensity in a relationship. I wouldn't have a problem dating someone younger than me, say 19. It's completely true, however, that it's a problem when older guys try to go for an intense, mature relationship with someone who isn't old enough to be in one, and you have to question whether they are projecting some kind of issues to do with wanting to relive their youth or something. My thoughts anyway.
    Understandably, men generally don't want to date older women because that's not really natural. You should want someone young as they're of better child-bearing age, that's just instinct. So maybe a 26yo is attracted to 18yos, but that doesn't mean its a good idea to get into a relationship with one. It seems to me like that is a relationship built on sexual attracton. unless the 18yo is very mature for her age, the man is missing out on a mature relationship with someone at the same stage of life.
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    Personally I like older men, so I'd say bounce on his good-stuff if he's up for it.
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    (Original post by Ingrid<3)
    Understandably, men generally don't want to date older women because that's not really natural. You should want someone young as they're of better child-bearing age, that's just instinct. So maybe a 26yo is attracted to 18yos, but that doesn't mean its a good idea to get into a relationship with one. It seems to me like that is a relationship built on sexual attracton. unless the 18yo is very mature for her age, the man is missing out on a mature relationship with someone at the same stage of life.
    Does depend though. Like for me, I'll hopefully be starting my undergrad in 2015 so when I finish I'll be about 25-6, and I won't be at the same stage of life as other people of my age who will have had jobs for years, will be more independent etc. so it's got to be evaluated on a case by case basis kinda
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    Love how people automatically assume people can't get somebody the same age rather than adopting the approaching of casting a wide net. I'm 25 and for a relationship i'd probably go anything from 18+ but i'd also go as high as 29 or possibly higher (don't really fancy 'damaged goods').

    I also think people put too much emphasis on life stages, so long as your in the same city then i don't see why a girl going to uni with a part time job while i work as a (lets say business consultant) is anything different from the girl working full time as a hairdresser while i work my aforementioned job. Eve in terms of interests there's bound to be plenty of stuff (sports, tv, gossip) that you liked then and now.

    So personally i just think people get judgy and try impose their conformist norms when there's nothing actually morally or legally wrong per say.
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    Hey,

    I don't think it is strange at all! As long as both of you are on the same line of maturity. I personally wouldn't date someone my age, at all because of my maturity state of mind.

    For in the past dating someone my age (I am 19, the guys I dated were round the age of 21) I found them very, very childish and basically not wanting to do anything. Where as now I am going into a relationship with someone who's 28 I found that we balance each other out, and we connect really well. We enjoy each others company, we also discussed what we were looking for in a relationship as well, us both are looking for a same thing. For me and in previous partners we didn't have the same goals, when I and this 28 year old do. Which I think it is now important.

    So, I think its down to maturity, and if you connect really well.
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    Yes she'll likely be more amenable to what you suggest in bed (which us presumably why you're interested). And you can buy her stuff she couldn't afford herself (probably a key factor for her). Quid pro quo.
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    I dont understand why it would be wrong. Why would you ask the question? You're a man, she's a woman, you're both grown up adults.

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    Your point?
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    I don't feel like it's a problem I can understand if you have a little sister who is the same age you would feel a little weird because the perception of the girl your with would be based on how immature or mature your sister is but I feel like if you like someone then age shouldn't matter as long as it's not illegal like 25 dating a 15 year old. If you both like eachother yeah I definitely feel like you should make a go of things if you do have a problem with age then hopefully once you get going you'll forget about that and see her for how much you like/ love her and not a number of she is mature then yeah go for it
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    Age is just a number. For people to have a healthy relationship they need to be at the same level of maturity, especially emotionally. As long as that is in place and they have a healthy relationship then why not.

    The creepiest thing in terms of age was a friend of mine in school that always went after younger guys. I mean she was dating 14 and 15 year olds when she was 18. That to me is just creepy, as the maturity levels that a 14 year old displays is far less than that of most 18 year olds.
 
 
 
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