I think the most important thing is for each person in the relationship to be happy alone and happy with themselves. I think each person should 'want' a relationship but not 'need' one.
Sometimes people look for relationships so hard because they are really looking for a 'crutch' in life to make up for something else in their life. For instance they may be insecure, have problems with other relationships in their lives such as a lack of good friends or closeness with family.
When people haven't reached a sense of happiness outside of a relationship they may end up putting too much pressure on the other person... relying on them to make them happy.
I think all this does is make the unhappy party take out everything on the other person. e.g. will look for constant reassurance from the other person, may transfer their trust issues from being hurt in the past to their new partner (making them suffer), they may become too clingy and demanding of the other person.
So these kind of relationships don't work out long term, it's just not how a relationship should be.
They're supposed to be about enjoying and experiencing life with another person with a sense of equality, not about a happy party trying to 'bring up' or 'fix' the unhappy one - it's just not fair....and it's no basis for a long term thing that could potentially lead to a family etc.
What's most important in a relationship? Watch
- 07-04-2013 15:36
- 07-04-2013 15:43
While physical intimacy is very important too, there would be no relationship without friendship. Your partner should be your best friend as well as lover IMO
- 07-04-2013 15:56
To want to make the other person happy, and to make the other person happy.
For this to be reciprocal from both parties.
Achieved through trust, communication and action!
- 07-04-2013 16:41
- 07-04-2013 18:36
A mutual effort from both people.
- 07-04-2013 23:42