Officer, I can explain! Watch

Pastaferian
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#41
Report 5 years ago
#41
(Original post by the bear)
New Items:
i) A half size Dalek
ii) A cricket box~ extra large size
iii) A hardback copy of Anne of Green Gables
Honestly, it's not what it looks like, Officer...
i) The Dalek is an Xmas present for my younger brother
ii) I'm on my way to the cricket nets (the need for 'extra large' should be obvious)
iii) A book by my favourite author? - hardly illegal

New items:
- annotated maps showing where members of the Cabinet live
- two dozen doses of GHB
- a catapult
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the bear
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#42
Report 5 years ago
#42
(Original post by Pastaferian)

New items:
- annotated maps showing where members of the Cabinet live
- two dozen doses of GHB
- a catapult

- annotated maps showing where members of the Cabinet live:

i want to deliver my Christmas cards early to beat the rush

- two dozen doses of GHB:

to help me through the next series of Downton Abbey

- a catapult:

i am a keen fisherman and use it to fling maggots to the fish


new items:

i) A woolly jumper with "Proud to be a Moderator" embroidered in large green letters on the back

ii) A book of logarithms

iii) A pair of rice-flails
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DannyYYYY
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#43
Report Thread starter 5 years ago
#43
(Original post by the bear)
- annotated maps showing where members of the Cabinet live:

i want to deliver my Christmas cards early to beat the rush

- two dozen doses of GHB:

to help me through the next series of Downton Abbey

- a catapult:

i am a keen fisherman and use it to fling maggots to the fish


new items:

i) A woolly jumper with "Proud to be a Moderator" embroidered in large green letters on the back

ii) A book of logarithms

iii) A pair of rice-flails
Officer, I'm on my war to a maths convention. You know how events have ushers? Well, at our convention they're called moderators and I'm one.. and I love it! The other things? It's a hobby of mine.

1) A rifle
2) The ID of someone who has been missing for weeks
3) A map of the local area

You are pulled over outside your own house.
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the bear
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#44
Report 5 years ago
#44
(Original post by DannyYYYY)
Officer, I'm on my war to a maths convention. You know how events have ushers? Well, at our convention they're called moderators and I'm one.. and I love it! The other things? It's a hobby of mine.

1) A rifle
2) The ID of someone who has been missing for weeks
3) A map of the local area

You are pulled over outside your own house.
A rifle:

I am stuck on a ballistics problem in M1 involving a bullet penetrating 12cm into a block of wood. I thought that recreating the problem in real life would get me more marks.

The ID:

I am going to ask around the people in my cellar if it belongs to any of them

The map:

It is great for finding new places to hide things.


New Items:

A scrabble set with all the vowels removed

A kipper

An extra large Onesie with Miley Cyrus theme
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McRite
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#45
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#45
I am organizing a pre-Christmas party with a game night that involves a hard scrabble game. Since I'm broke from buying my grandpa an Onesie for his weird fetish, I could only afford one Kipper for the whole family

New items:

1. An old Nokia 3310 with one contact number
2. A red stain on the carpet
3. An A-Level Further Maths Texbook
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the bear
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#46
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#46
(Original post by McRite)
I am organizing a pre-Christmas party with a game night that involves a hard scrabble game. Since I'm broke from buying my grandpa an Onesie for his weird fetish, I could only afford one Kipper for the whole family

New items:

1. An old Nokia 3310 with one contact number
2. A red stain on the carpet
3. An A-Level Further Maths Texbook
i)... i want to be able to ring Childline at any time

ii) i told my girlfriend to keep Spartacus the hamster's cage shut

iii) i need help getting to sleep

******************************** ******

New items:

i) 12 rolls of industrial strength duct tape

ii) The latest issue of Air Hostess Weekly ( incorporating Baggage Handler's News )

iii) A jumbo pack of Maltesers
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