Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Guys, Would You Date a Single Mum? Watch

    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    nope; I have my whole life ahead of me and I can't afford to pay for a child
    also, I hate babies so that just rubs salts into the wound
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Nope
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Juichiro)
    That makes no sense. When you were FRIENDS, you asked him "if I had a child when we met and he said he still would be with me and if anything would probably strive harder to provide a stable household sooner". See the bolded bits, either you asked him the questions when you in a relationship "he still would be with me" (implied you asked him the question when he was with you).

    And even if he wasn't your partner when you asked him the question, he could still lie to you just not to lose the chance to date you.
    No I asked him years ago 'would he date a single mum' so it wasn't even to do with me. I asked him today the very same question. Same answer. I wasn't clear earlier as that was typed after I just woke up.

    And again as I said, he's brutally honest. Even if he wanted to be with me he would still say what he really thinks. Same now, he's been honest with more important issues (i don't deem this important since it's not applicable to me) even if that meant a screaming match so I know he wouldn't lie about a hypothetical scenario asked in passing.



    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Nope, unless she was something really special.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    No. Maybe if I was in my late 20s but even then, somebody else's child would really put me off.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I wouldn't, unless she was something special, I felt mature and old enough to settle down with children, and the father had disappeared completely (in which case I could take over the father role completely).

    I struggle to find females in general who I feel compelled enough to date let alone females with children.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    100% no.
    Online

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Eva.Gregoria)
    I don't understand what the issue is with bringing up another man's child? It's just a child for goodness sake! Hardly some fragile alien that needs 24/7 care, just screams of a lack of fatherly traits imo.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Lol, that's a pretty stupid post.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    OP at your age it will be more difficult because most (not all) guys who are 20-25 aren't interested in having children yet.

    When you're a bit older you'll probably find more guys are open to the idea. It's still gonna limit you a bit but it's not like you're never gonna be able to be in a relationship again.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    You could turn lesbian and get one of those "empowered" feminist wannabe men to look after your child.
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    No.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Never.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    My best friend is 20 and he's in a relationship with a girl with a 4 year old son. Doesn't bother him at all. He is not part of the childs life and she hasn't introduced them to each other yet. Some guys will date somebody with a child
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    This is no criticism of the lady and i guess anything is possible but generally id steer clear of single mums.

    Reasons why..

    1) Im not bringing up some other guys child
    2) Alpha lays, Beta pays...
    3)Danger of some ungrateful brat reminding me that im not its father..blah blah blah..
    4) Useless father in the back ground coming to visit
    5) Being a potential meal ticket


    I think a good option for some single mums is to seek out a single dad ?
    Offline

    7
    ReputationRep:
    Not at this stage of my life no. I feel I'm too young to be able to cope with the pressures of being so closely involved in a child's life. It wouldn't be fair to parent or the child, so I wouldn't at this stage, but that's not to say I never would, circumstances change and you can't help who you fall in love with, I'd just prefer not to right now.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    If we had a connection I would date you short term but nothing long term
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    No.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Eva.Gregoria)
    I don't understand what the issue is with bringing up another man's child? It's just a child for goodness sake! Hardly some fragile alien that needs 24/7 care, just screams of a lack of fatherly traits imo.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    I completely agree. My boyfriend has a 14 year old daughter and whilst I probably wouldn't have entered into a relationship with him when I was still an undergraduate or if his child was younger (say under 10), I'm now mature enough to be comfortable with the situation. Contrary to popular belief, I've never felt like I'm "raising another women's child" because she already has a mum and doesn't need another one. She is a teenager and therefore doesn't need babying, I'm a role model and someone she feels comfortable speaking to about any problems - there are a lot of things teenage girls don't want to speak to their dad's about.

    Honestly, if you really, really like someone and just the fact that they already have a child is the sole reason you'd stop dating them, you might want to try being a bit more open minded.

    I'm also interested in what the general response would be if the genders were reversed...
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Maybe, depends how she got the child, (like if it was a one night stand or just things didn't work out with the father) how often the child saw the father, if the girl had her own place and if she had a job or if she was a stay at home parent would all impact this, probably no, but if we both got on really well then possibly....
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Maybe, depends how she got the child, (like if it was a one night stand or just things didn't work out with the father) how often the child saw the father, if the girl had her own place and if she had a job or if she was a stay at home parent would all impact this, probably no, but if we both got on really well then possibly....
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: February 21, 2017
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    What newspaper do you read/prefer?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.