High-earning parents are leaving me on my own Watch

TolerantBeing
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#41
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#41
(Original post by MJ1012)
Average UK salary £26,500. Both parents being average= £53,000. £66,000 is nothing special.

Averages mean nothing. My family's joint income was probs £30k at peak times.
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Chlorophile
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#42
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#42
(Original post by TolerantBeing)
What area do you live in?


Oh, I'm sorry, the government should increase loans to those with high incomes who live in a posh area. :rolleyes:
The fact that I live in an area with not-so-cheap house prices doesn't change the fact that my parents don't have a lot more disposable income to spend on my tuition fees than someone with a lower income. I'm not complaining about how poor my family is because we aren't, I'm saying that the idea that your parents must be able to fund your university fees because your household income is £60k is absurd. A £60k income doesn't make you rich and in many places in London, that would be very low.
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MJ1012
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#43
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#43
(Original post by TolerantBeing)
Averages mean nothing. My family's joint income was probs £30k at peak times.
That's below average though...
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TolerantBeing
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#44
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(Original post by Cold Phoenix)
that's pre tax and it's not that much post tax u idiot
If my family earned that much when we were younger, we would have lived comfortable, stress free lives. It's all about how you spend, and save. My family earned £30k and we were alright. Of course I'm not factoring in a decent car, posh area, and nice holiday into essentials like you probs are. Try telling a working class family that 66k isn't that much and they'll laugh in your face.


It's not #firstworldoroblems, it's #middleclassproblems.
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slg60
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#45
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#45
(Original post by rana96)
Is this sarcasm ( I'm genuinely looking for advice, sorry if it comes across as a *****fest!!
what no I was saying its sad that this isnt a *****fest normally when i see a title like this one on this site its some public school boy complaining that mummy and daddy arent buying him the Aston Martin he expected for uni.

Whereas here you actually have a problem so thats why i said sorry, you get me?
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scrotgrot
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#46
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#46
(Original post by Chlorophile)
I'm pretty sure my parents are more than 10 years away from paying off their mortgage and I don't know how much our house has risen in value but it's irrelevant since they're not selling it. It's absolutely absurd to even come up with the idea of my parents selling their house and losing their jobs just so that I don't need to have any debt...
I understand that the situation is not so rosy as the £66,000 and London house may imply. But you must also recognise that a couple of generations ago when families were more "us against the world", in the same situation your parents would certainly have released capital from the house to help you go to university. They will earn the requisite supplementary amount to fund you for the entire course in just one year of London house price appreciation, if not earlier.
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Anusol User
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#47
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#47
Try and make friends with your parents again. I live on the streets right now and it's not fun.
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Chlorophile
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#48
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(Original post by scrotgrot)
I understand that the situation is not so rosy as the £66,000 and London house may imply. But you must also recognise that a couple of generations ago when families were more "us against the world", in the same situation your parents would certainly have released capital from the house to help you go to university. They will earn the requisite supplementary amount to fund you for the entire course in just one year of London house price appreciation, if not earlier.
Okay but in case you haven't realised, this is the 21st Century, not the 19th Century.
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rana96
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#49
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#49
(Original post by nulli tertius)
Do you have any uncles or aunts you could raise this subject with?

They seems to be a number of different issues here and it isn't clear you have them all straight.

Kicking out a child to be independent is culturally unusual. One would expect a family wanting their child to stand on their own two feet to demand that their child pays board.

Do they understand that the student finding doesn't add up?

Do they not want you to do any course at university, or just not to do this course?

Can they actually not afford this; if so why are they not willing to say so?

Do they expect you to earn money for a few years and save up yourself to go to university?

Unless there has been a major falling up, most parents do not say "you are on your own". Even if they want you to get a job rather than go to university or whatever, they normally have a vision for your future. You don't have to share that vision. However most parents don't simply stop caring at all what you do.
All my family live in another country and have their own families to worry about. Culturally it's really wrong for me to go to them for help anyways and they'd definitely contact my parents to tell them off, lmao.

I think it's just that my parents simply can't afford to keep me at home or to fund me living away. They have a load of mortgage/car/health expenses to pay for, plus my other two siblings, and they're using this as an excuse to lessen the financial burden on themselves. They just don't want to say so because again, culturally it's pretty wrong. They don't expect me to take a gap year; in fact my mum advised against it.
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scrotgrot
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#50
(Original post by Chlorophile)
Okay but in case you haven't realised, this is the 21st Century, not the 19th Century.
More like the mid-20th century. I am personally rather chauvinistic for the idea that people, if they can manage it, should build granny annexes and so forth and generally face the world as a unitary family.
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Chlorophile
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#51
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(Original post by scrotgrot)
More like the mid-20th century. I am personally rather chauvinistic for the idea that people, if they can manage it, should build granny annexes and so forth and generally face the world as a unitary family.
Okay but I'm of the opinion that that's ridiculous.
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scrotgrot
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#52
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#52
(Original post by rana96)
All my family live in another country and have their own families to worry about. Culturally it's really wrong for me to go to them for help anyways and they'd definitely contact my parents to tell them off, lmao.

I think it's just that my parents simply can't afford to keep me at home or to fund me living away. They have a load of mortgage/car/health expenses to pay for, plus my other two siblings, and they're using this as an excuse to lessen the financial burden on themselves. They just don't want to say so because again, culturally it's pretty wrong. They don't expect me to take a gap year; in fact my mum advised against it.
Then simply tell them you will be taking a gap year despite their wishes so that you will have the cash flow to fund yourself without stressing about money/wasting study time doing a job.
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scrotgrot
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#53
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(Original post by Chlorophile)
Okay but I'm of the opinion that that's ridiculous.
Why is that? I think if it can be done it is preferable to farming old people out to "care" homes to die, or kicking kids out at 18 just because "I'd been down the mines for half my life at your age"
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Like_A_G6
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#54
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Take a gap year, and get a placement in a company like GSK (if they do one). That'll allow you to save up £8k prior to the start of University and will rocket your employment chances with the company. If you perform well, they may even allow you to take summer internships with them - that's around £1500 saved for 10 weeks worth of work after expenditures. Assuming you do a 4 year course, £8k/4 = £2k per year. This means your budget for the year is £5500 for the first year, and potentially £7k for the following three - provided you do summer internships/summer work.

Universities also want students to help out on campus, so working at the union shop/bar/being a tour guide gives you at least £7/hour. If you do 8 hours per week, that's £56 <- Living costs minus rent sorted right there.
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Chlorophile
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(Original post by scrotgrot)
Why is that? I think if it can be done it is preferable to farming old people out to "care" homes to die, or kicking kids out at 18 just because "I'd been down the mines for half my life at your age"
My parents aren't "kicking me out" - I just think it's a teensy weensy bit out of proportion (aka utter lunacy) to expect my parents to sell the house I've lived in all my life so that I don't have any debts. It's not like I'm going into a well paid career anyway, there's no way on earth I could pay it back to them in any way shape or form. I'll probably be poorer than them.
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Le Nombre
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#56
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(Original post by TolerantBeing)
If my family earned that much when we were younger, we would have lived comfortable, stress free lives. It's all about how you spend, and save. My family earned £30k and we were alright. Of course I'm not factoring in a decent car, posh area, and nice holiday into essentials like you probs are. Try telling a working class family that 66k isn't that much and they'll laugh in your face.


It's not #firstworldoroblems, it's #middleclassproblems.

I think in London 30k would be pushing it, accommodation and travel in particular are much more expensive, elsewhere it would be OK, I don't think it would be comfortable in many places.
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liass
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#57
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#57
Have the same problem. My parents earn around £150k and are refusing to support me through uni I want to study medicine in London, which sucks
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balotelli12
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#58
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#58
Thousands of students like you
They get a job
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Planckton
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#59
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#59
(Original post by Le Nombre)
I think in London 30k would be pushing it, accommodation and travel in particular are much more expensive, elsewhere it would be OK, I don't think it would be comfortable in many places.
30k would be a dream for my family hahaha. we're on ~16k with 5 kids in a semi detached in a nice village, it's really not that bad, I'd say we live comfortably.
Just teaches you the value of money, which is a concept missed by most of the spoilt middle classers that I know!
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lovali
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I really don't have any constructive advice, just wanted to offer my sympathies for your situation.

After GCSEs I was kicked out to support myself & as a result didn't do A levels. I am now a 33 year old single mother working to put myself through an access course to try & get in to uni.

As much as your family's culture isn't accepting of certain questions being asked I would try again. Point out that if they make it impossible for you study effectively you could end up liable for the repayment of student loans for a university course that you cannot complete. Will they really want to see you in a dead-end job with no prospects?
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