Only attracted to older men Watch

queen-bee
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#41
Report 4 years ago
#41
[QUOTE=civilstudent;52094899]
(Original post by queen-bee)

I agree, a 57 year old who I've known for years asked me on dates etc even asked me to sleep with him to the point that it felt creepy. I told him that I like spending time with him (I like him and am a little attracted but don't want sex) but that I don't want to go to his house and have sex. He Said it's fine and is still willing to spend time with me, I'm surprised I thought he just wanted sex!. we go out a lot to cafe's for drinks several times a week together. So although he tried it on with me and I refused it seems that he really does enjoy spending time with me. Although I'm not sure how long this will last lol, although the seems to enjoy our outings (he doesn't drive I'm the driver) only time will tell I suppose.
I see nothing wrong with it, maybe if the age gap is alittle wider then yes but if he's like 10-20 years older then I don't mind. Spending quality time doesn't mean it's l about sex sex sex,some people just like good company
1
reply
Dr who11
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#42
Report 4 years ago
#42
(Original post by Anonymous)
Anon or delete please.

Basically, I'm 21. I've never had a proper relationship and for that reason I'm not entirely sure. But I feel that I've never been properly attracted to a guy my age. Up until quite recently I've just thought to myself I couldn't really be bothered with it all.

But one thing I've felt since around 16 is that I've been attracted to older men. Like 30s-40s. I thought when I was younger it was just a silly teenage thing, a lot of teen girls are attracted to authority figures. So I've almost been waiting to grow out of, but I haven't. And it's becoming an issue now because I really would like to be in a relationship but I know a relationship with an older man is not in any way feasible...

Firstly, I am young for my age. So the difference in maturity would be ridiculous. Secondly, I know my attraction is not logical. I have met older men in bars and have flirted and chatted with them, and while I find them attractive my mind is questioning why they find someone so much younger than them attractive.

Has anybody else experienced this? I need advice!

I think what I find attractive is that they seem to have this power to them, like they know exactly who they are and what they expect of the world. This sort of self assertiveness that younger guys don't have.
hashtag: wierd
0
reply
inachigeek21
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#43
Report 4 years ago
#43
It's cool OP.
Been there, done that.
0
reply
the_vorlon
Badges: 3
Rep:
?
#44
Report 4 years ago
#44
(Original post by Le Nombre)
Ok, but presumably then you're still ln the same goal you were at 20 odd, building a successful relationship, in which case you aren't very good at meeting goals.

But you said having the same goals, which you've then admitted you don't. Your OH is looking to become something very senior whilst you're just starting out. Supporting other people in their goals is not the same as having the same goals. I supported my parents in their career goals when I was fifteen, didn't mean I was looking to achieve the same.
The presuming is what I take objection to..In the case of my OH he wasn't interested in building a relationship in his 20's or even really his 30's. He was working 6 days a week, starting his own business and part raising his younger brother. Therefore a relationship wasn't a priority. I'm not trying to justify why he hasn't settled down earlier, I'm simply making a point that not everyone's sole goal in life is to build a relationship, get married and have kids and they need to do it before they hit a certain age.

I admitted my OH weren't at the same stage in our careers, therefore perhaps careers are an area we differ, I personally don't see that as an issue. We have similar goals in other areas for example we both want to buy a house, get married, go on nice holidays etc.
1
reply
Anonymous post
Badges: 2
Rep:
?
#45
Report 3 years ago
#45
Ok well here's me ever so weird input:

Im an 18 year old male, I've had a great upbringing from both parents (who are still together) and I'm well educated. I've been told I'm very down to earth and I'd say I'm just very normal, aside from this one weird thing:

I was always a bit behind in the relationship side of things - I think the issue was I never really found myself attracted to anyone, in hindsight. Anyway I slowly grasped the idea I was only, for some reason, attracted to older - wait for it - men. Yes. Double whammy. I'm super weird. Not only gay but I still couldn't even consider someone my age attractive.

Anyway, I let this sink in for a few years, hoping I'd grow out of it the whole time. But no - it's still here. I wouldn't dare tell anyone this but seeing as though it's anonymous I'm hoping it might help some people. I resent myself for it sometimes, but I've now been seeing an older guy (he's 54 - I know it's weird ok) for over a year and it rarely crosses my mind when we're together.

There's no real conclusion to my input. I'm almost just letting everyone know there's someone with a worse situation here. But regardless, I'm making it work. It is possible. So my advice is just do what you're comfortable with and either don't tell people or just accept that some people aren't ok with it.
1
reply
Sweet n Sour
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#46
Report 3 years ago
#46
I've never been averse to some greys, a bad cough, and a dad bod either, hun.
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you registered to vote?

Yes! (269)
38.32%
No - but I will (49)
6.98%
No - I don't want to (51)
7.26%
No - I can't vote (<18, not in UK, etc) (333)
47.44%

Watched Threads

View All