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How do I get a muslim girl to be my GF(not like other threads) watch

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    (Original post by Abdul-Karim)
    You need the permission of the Wali (her dad)
    I dont think I am 100% ready for marriage.
    This is a huge commitment.
    I have no house, still at uni etc.
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    (Original post by yo radical one)
    You don't understand religion or religious thinking

    I could go on the TSR Islamic society/see the posts of serious Muslims and find so many things which I could provide a strong Islamic argument are technically Haram (I don't actually care enough to do this.)


    Yet these Muslims do not see themselves as committing sin, heck there are schools of Islamic thinking which hold that taking photos of oneself is Haram, yet our good friend Abdul-Karim, despite taking Islam seriously, posts his pics on this website, there are also Imans who disagree and say that photography is Halal. The point I am making is that religion is as much a subjective relationship with yourself as it is with laws, it's not objective.
    I'm not an ideal representation of a 'Good Muslim', nevertheless.
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    (Original post by Up quark)
    Ditch her.

    Do not even go near to zina

    One would rather be hit by an iron rod than touch a non-mahram woman. Do you not see the danger of what you are doing

    Audhubillah. May allah protect us all
    Posted from TSR Mobile
    :puke:
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    (Original post by apple1992)
    I understand, I am sure she felt the same way at first when we met.
    We didnt really talk to look at each other.

    But now things have changed. She said to me she has never really liked any one. (when we first met).
    And I am sure when she came here she did not expect to like someone like me.
    breaking contact will just strengthen the desire.
    As far as im concerned, if you intend to do things the islamic way. You just have to marry her. That doesnt mean the two of you have to move in together or anything it just means you can be around each other, in a halal way. removing this haramness that oozes from this situation >.>

    I see no reason why you can't marry her? If you like her as much as you say you do. Unless your intentions are to just have her companionship for a little bit, then dump her and find yourself someone "better" to marry. Lots of young muslims get married young, have lovely long term relationships and then some get married young and it doesn't work out, either way it's both fine. My brother got married at uni, and yes islamically you should be providing for your wife, but it's not without leeway. If there's a mutual understanding that actually, i want to be with you but i can't provide for you right now, and she's willing to wait to move in together until you actually can provide for her then that is fine. People always are under the impression that men need to be like billionaires or something before they get married, ISLAMICALLY this is NOT the case, CULTURALLY this is the case. Stick to the deen bruh, it's saves a lot of aggro.

    If you don't have long term intentions with this girl, then back off and develop some self control, something that would help this is to stop having study dates with a bunch of girls? and stop the unnecessary chatter with girls?

    But Muslim "Girlfriend" is HUGE oxymoron, because we all know it's haram bruh.
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    (Original post by gen. AIDEED)
    or a muslim ruler
    (Original post by apple1992)
    I dont think I am 100% ready for marriage.
    This is a huge commitment.
    I have no house, still at uni etc.
    Well then, this is exactly why marriage is there. If you're not fully commited to being with her for the rest of your life, it's unfair on her. As above, if you want to be together, her wali must be present for future interactions.
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    (Original post by Abdul-Karim)
    There is.. but with her dad present.
    Really, so If i want to go to dinner, her dad needs to be there.
    that is too awkward.
    I dont mind meeting her parents and family after we have developed a relationship.
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    (Original post by trasitszy)
    This. tbf If you make the choice to be in such a backwards and restrictive religion, then you've gotta stop whining about bits of it you don't like.
    Agreed. People choose to follow Islam and then whine about their restrictions. :lol:
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    (Original post by Abdul-Karim)
    Well then, this is exactly why marriage is there. If you're not fully commited to being with her for the rest of your life, it's unfair on her. As above, if you want to be together, her wali must be present for future interactions.
    I cant commit because I dont have the right stuff for marriage.
    I can offer her love only now.
    But no house, no money to live.
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    (Original post by apple1992)
    Really, so If i want to go to dinner, her dad needs to be there.
    that is too awkward.
    I dont mind meeting her parents and family after we have developed a relationship.
    Your religion is awkward like that.
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    (Original post by Abdul-Karim)
    Well then, this is exactly why marriage is there. If you're not fully commited to being with her for the rest of your life, it's unfair on her. As above, if you want to be together, her wali must be present for future interactions.
    how is that unfair on her, if she knows his situation and still wants to get married, thats her choice
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    (Original post by apple1992)
    I cant commit because I dont have the right stuff for marriage.
    I can offer her love only now.
    But no house, no money to live.
    Find a compromise with her dad. Say your future intentions are xyz.. and see what he says. If you don't try, it's just going to be haram and you'll feel guilty.

    I should probably take my own advice but I'm too much of a whimp.
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    (Original post by Abdul-Karim)
    I'm not an ideal representation of a 'Good Muslim', nevertheless.
    There are no good Muslims right.?

    Certainly it is written that only Allah knows who is destined for paradise and who is not, if this is true, then nobody actually has the right to tell OP what to do, since they (by Islamic teaching) are in no real position to know.


    It was an example, the different Islamic schools (Hanifi, Maliki etc) have different rulings on this matter, so ultimately it boils down to what the individual Muslim can reconcile with his or her own conscience.
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    (Original post by Lulu24)
    As far as im concerned, if you intend to do things the islamic way. You just have to marry her. That doesnt mean the two of you have to move in together or anything it just means you can be around each other, in a halal way. removing this haramness that oozes from this situation >.>

    I see no reason why you can't marry her? If you like her as much as you say you do. Unless your intentions are to just have her companionship for a little bit, then dump her and find yourself someone "better" to marry. Lots of young muslims get married young, have lovely long term relationships and then some get married young and it doesn't work out, either way it's both fine.

    If you don't have long term intentions with this girl, then back off and develop some self control, something that would help this is to stop having study dates with a bunch of girls? and stop the unnecessary chatter with girls?

    But Muslim "Girlfriend" is HUGE oxymoron, because we all know it's haram bruh.
    I do have strong feelings for her.
    I have had lots of girls like me(white british) and ask me out. But I turned them down, becuase I did not like them.

    Marriage at 19, to extreme.
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    (Original post by apple1992)
    I cant commit because I dont have the right stuff for marriage.
    I can offer her love only now.
    But no house, no money to live.
    Not good enough.

    Either accept becoming a moderate Muslim (where you don't follow certain rules because you find it unfitting for modern society) or break off whatever you have with this girl.
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    (Original post by yo radical one)
    There are no good Muslims right.?

    Certainly it is written that only Allah knows who is destined for paradise and who is not, if this is true, then nobody actually has the right to tell OP what to do, since they (by Islamic teaching) are in no real position to know.


    It was an example, the different Islamic schools (Hanifi, Maliki etc) have different rulings on this matter, so ultimately it boils down to what the individual Muslim can reconcile with his or her own conscience.
    What do those schools say about dating,
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    (Original post by apple1992)
    Marriage at 19, to extreme.
    Islam can be extreme like that.
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    (Original post by Groot)
    Not good enough.

    Either accept becoming a moderate Muslim (where you don't follow certain rules because you find it unfitting for modern society) or break off whatever you have with this girl.
    I guess I am gonna have to break up a good relationship we have developed.
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    (Original post by apple1992)
    What do those schools say about dating,
    Why do they have a monopoly on what's right?
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    (Original post by Groot)
    Your religion is awkward like that.
    reported
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    No offense buddy.. halal or haram, make your choice. *JigSaW voice over*
 
 
 
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