Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Sleeping with a guy I don't find attractive Watch

    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)

    He had facial surgery and has early signs of hair loss. I do feel bad for him, but I am not going out with him out of pity.
    cod damn women are so shallow lol. further proof that hair loss is a death sentence, looks like your bf is on his way to the norwood cemetary - RIP in peace
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Greg Jackson)
    cod damn women are so shallow lol. further proof that hair loss is a death sentence, looks like your bf is on his way to the norwood cemetary - RIP in peace
    22 percent bodyfat brah who doesn't have problems with women checking in.

    Can you imagine the uproar if this thread was about a man wanting his girl to loose fat and lift though, people would be calling him shallow, jerk etc but here are people telling her she doesn't respect herself.

    Uwotm8.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been seeing him for nearly two months, and we've just started sleeping together. But he has a bit of a belly, not muscle definition at all and is also quite self conscious. When we were dating, we'd flirt a LOT and he acted so confident. But now in bed, I can tell he is very self conscious. Will only get intimate in the dark etc.

    I enjoy his company but I don't think I'm attracted to him. I always say I think he's hot etc and it makes him happy. But I feel like I'm lying to him.

    I have said things like "We should work out together" "Let's go jogging" etc because I work out everyday at home or in the gym. I'm not fitness model, but I like to take care of my body. He used to workout too, but he let himself go after some personal problems. Don't know how to tackle this problem.

    What shall I do?

    You sure he isn't a she. Because if you aint seen his bits you won't know.
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been seeing him for nearly two months, and we've just started sleeping together. But he has a bit of a belly, not muscle definition at all and is also quite self conscious. When we were dating, we'd flirt a LOT and he acted so confident. But now in bed, I can tell he is very self conscious. Will only get intimate in the dark etc.

    I enjoy his company but I don't think I'm attracted to him. I always say I think he's hot etc and it makes him happy. But I feel like I'm lying to him.

    I have said things like "We should work out together" "Let's go jogging" etc because I work out everyday at home or in the gym. I'm not fitness model, but I like to take care of my body. He used to workout too, but he let himself go after some personal problems. Don't know how to tackle this problem.

    What shall I do?
    So basically he gets laid with an apparently "hot" girl whilst that girl moans about how she's not attracted to him... That guy is a G lmaoooo

    The joke is on you... Whatever you choose to do now, he wins either way :holmes:
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    Who is this guy...

    ...and how can I learn from him?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ParadiseFound)
    22 percent bodyfat brah who doesn't have problems with women checking in.

    Can you imagine the uproar if this thread was about a man wanting his girl to loose fat and lift though, people would be calling him shallow, jerk etc but here are people telling her she doesn't respect herself.

    Uwotm8.
    Reluctantly I agree, there's some gender bias on here, possibly to mitigate the impact of the obvious sexist trolls.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by MinionMogul)
    Have you not realisef TSR is biased against men because of the age group and modding? It takes extreme sexists to get a male perspective noticed.
    dat dere feminist schooling/university institution
    Offline

    15
    (Original post by Rakas21)
    I don't think you need to dump him since you've not cheated and seem to still like everything else about him. I do think you should give him an ultimatum though.. he has 6 months to be the man you know he can be or you will seek a more desirable mate.
    I hope he kicks her to the curb!
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ParadiseFound)
    22 percent bodyfat brah who doesn't have problems with women checking in.

    Can you imagine the uproar if this thread was about a man wanting his girl to loose fat and lift though, people would be calling him shallow, jerk etc but here are people telling her she doesn't respect herself.

    Uwotm8.
    Bang on.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Gambit92)
    Where's your self respect?
    Other way around. I'd ask someone where their self respect was if they stayed in a relationship with someone they didn't even find attractive.
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Tom_Ford)
    Tbh if i was the guy and knew this i'd dump her ass in a second. Hermit myself for as long as it takes to become a sick shredded slaying machine. Then **** hotter girls and rub it in her face.

    All that for one woman? You must really love her.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    *Reads through comments* Ugh... *Leaves TSR*
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Choose the option that will hurt him least. If that means telling him the truth now rather than later, so be it.

    Opinion, also
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by tehFrance)
    I hope he kicks her to the curb!
    WHY? What a nutjob.


    (Original post by Jammie_x)
    When you first start having sex with someone - they are nervous at first but the more times you sleep with someone then the more you grow confident and you do trust that person more so are willing to be yourself more. Tbh, I'm exactly the same lol. It's just cause you don't know each other that well...

    I wouldn't say you wasn't attracted to him because I do actually think you are. You said you love his confidence and arrogance so you are attracted to his personality at least. I would keep trying to suggest to hm about gym etc. but perhaps he feels anxious after the surgery so something like that makes him feel out of place? It's a lot different for a man to go to the gym etc. then a woman. More expectations tbh etc. if it is really bothering you that much after a few weeks or so - then I would end it with him. It's not fair to lead him on and think there is something there when you don't think that.



    Posted from TSR Mobile
    I was nervous too, I've only ever been with one other guy and I was with him since I was 14.

    I'll see how this goes, we'll be hanging out at his place this Friday evening. I do want this to work out because I like him as a person and I don't think I'm shallow enough to dump someone just because they're in a bad place at the moment and have let some things go. We all have rough times and this is one of his. Not sure why some loonies on this thread are making me out to be a cow. :rolleyes:

    (Original post by Greg Jackson)
    cod damn women are so shallow lol. further proof that hair loss is a death sentence, looks like your bf is on his way to the norwood cemetary - RIP in peace
    (Original post by Guy Secretan)
    Does he have a receding hairline. What so you don't think he is good looking either (as well as his body) also good for you regarding the blow. I don't really know what to suggest as I don't understand why you agreed to be with him if you knew you didn't find him attractive.
    He doesn't really, I haven't noticed it that much. But once we were in the shower and he told me he was quite insecure about it and showed part of his hair which has thinned a bit. I found his confidence attractive, and now that he put it on, it does seem a bit misleading. But I also like the fact that he can open up to me and trusts me to tell me how he feels.

    (Original post by thePatron)
    How many inches doh?
    I'm guessing around 8
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Give him a chance to get his confidence up. Sounds like his time out with surgery etc messed with his self esteem, and it can be a bit of a vicious circle. You said you're hot - this'll probably give him motivation to get in better shape. :P
    Offline

    7
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)

    I'm guessing around 8
    Is it really? What is he, black?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thePatron)
    Is it really? What is he, black?
    Asian! I was shocked!
    Offline

    7
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Asian! I was shocked!

    Asian as in Oriental or South East Asian
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thePatron)
    Asian as in Oriental or South East Asian
    South East Asian
    Offline

    7
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    South East Asian

    Well, that narrows it down alot, so basically you dont like him, or feel that you dont like him is because you are a racist!


    There you go, ive help you realise this...

    Throw some currency on the way out.. thank you come again.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: January 28, 2015
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Brexit voters: Do you stand by your vote?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Write a reply...
    Reply
    Hide
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.