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Boyfriend won't go down on me... Watch

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    (Original post by macromicro)
    Cunnilingus is an exquisite and esoteric art so I beg to differ, Frankie.
    I bow down to your eloquent superiority, sir

    Don't forget to lick the alphabet. The Chinese alphabet on special occasions.
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    (Original post by macromicro)
    Yet not in this thread it seems
    See above re: literal basis for his mistake. I freely admit that my interpretation did not tally with his intended meaning but that was patently his bad, not mine; to attempt to argue to the contrary is utterly ridiculous, this is a matter of pretty elemental English + a modicum of common sense :rolleyes:

    maintain this relative consistency that you boast
    Rarely do I boast

    in this case, it was intended yet you interpreted it literally and incorrectly, which would have been easily forgivable
    Supposing you genuinely do not get it (anything’s possible), allow me to draw you an analogy:

    When sitting an exam, let’s say in Economics, if you conflate e.g. growth with inflation in an answer and get marked down because of it, do you then go to the examiner and tell him it’s his mistake but that it’s easily forgivable? No, you do not, if you have a shred of sense (never mind decency)

    out of stubborn pride
    My only agenda is truth/justice; I’m not overly keen on looking proud/pedantic but alas y’all rather forced my hand

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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Ironically however (for a narcissist), I have tended not to share results/achievements with anyone unless they've asked - even then I tend not to tell them too much; this is partly because I think pride is a vice, and find boastful people intolerable
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    See above re: literal basis for his mistake. I freely admit that my interpretation did not tally with his intended meaning but that was patently his bad, not mine; to attempt to argue to the contrary is utterly ridiculous, this is a matter of pretty elemental English + a modicum of common sense :roll eyes:
    Yet my interpretation did indeed tally with his intended meaning, which puts your opinion of his mistake in something of a predicament. That is, I don't believe using somewhat ambiguous language (the infamous "tell" which is both the cause and sustainment of this petty exchange) is wrong if the implication/intention is clear enough, which it was for me. To find that "utterly ridiculous" is therefore highly questionable, not to mention melodramatic.

    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Rarely do I boast
    I don't doubt it; though in that moment you did.

    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Supposing you genuinely do not get it (anything’s possible), allow me to draw you an analogy:

    When sitting an exam, let’s say in Economics, if you conflate e.g. growth with inflation in an answer and get marked down because of it, do you then go to the examiner and tell him it’s his mistake but that it’s easily forgivable? No, you do not, if you have a shred of sense (never mind decency)
    Only on TSR do we see an ostensibly serious analogy between off-hand remarks and academia! We do not live by a mark scheme; our free interactions and communication may very well be subtle and nuanced and subjective and therefore dependent on interpretation, but by no means analogous to an exam.

    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    My only agenda is truth/justice; I’m not overly keen on looking proud/pedantic but alas y’all rather forced my hand
    And that is an agenda we share, though it is one thing to talk of virtues and vices and another thing altogether to display and avoid them.
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    (Original post by macromicro)
    Yet my interpretation did indeed tally with his intended meaning, which puts your opinion of his mistake in something of a predicament. That is, I don't believe using somewhat ambiguous language (the infamous "tell" which is both the cause and sustainment of this petty exchange) is wrong if the implication/intention is clear enough, which it was for me. To find that "utterly ridiculous" is therefore highly questionable, not to mention melodramatic
    Know when you're beaten amigo, it's getting embarrassing now:mute:

    I don't doubt it; though in that moment you did.
    Nope, just setting the record straight

    Only on TSR do we see an ostensibly serious analogy between off-hand remarks and academia! We do not live by a mark scheme; our free interactions and communication may very well be subtle and nuanced and subjective and therefore dependent on interpretation, but by no means analogous to an exam
    Tautological comments about subjectivity earn you nil points :pierre: (see 'common sense' above)
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Know when you're beaten amigo, it's getting embarrassing now:mute:
    Irony tastes delicious. Is it getting dark down there?

    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Tautological comments about subjectivity earn you nil points :pierre: (see 'common sense' above)
    In which case we ought to deduct points from your pointing to interpretation, though why this ruling is in place god only knows; subjectivity is the core of every human interaction.
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    (Original post by macromicro)
    subjectivity is the core of every human interaction
    Hence tautology :congrats:
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Hence tautology :congrats:
    It's not tautological. What it is, is an explanation of your mistake in this thread, i.e. your misinterpretation of the post compared to my correct interpretation (see 'subjectivity' above), after which you took out your trusty spade until you were neck deep in soil.

    This has been riveting, and while you put in a courageous effort - until the exam analogy of course, though I won't hold your quintessential TSRian nature against you due to the location of this debate - I am as bored of the issue as I am of you and of myself, which is lose-lose-lose, particularly in a thread of this nature. Goodnight my friend, I have some cunnilingus to enjoy, and wish the same for you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    We've only been together officially for a short while, but he's gone down on me only once in that time, even though I often go down on him several times in one night. He's mentioned it when we've sexted in the past but he just never does it. He does use his fingers but it's not the same for me, I find it a lot harder to finish and it's really frustrating. Ive told him before that the most pleasure i get is from oral... I've never had an issue with guys going down on me before, in fact most of the guys I've been with did it very willingly. I don't want to have to outright ask him to do it because I think that's kinda unsexy... What should I do? :/
    Just ask. He may find that sexy. 😏


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    (Original post by macromicro)
    That's not smart, it's immature and petty. I'm not sure why people are trying to over-complicate something so simple: she literally just has to talk to her boyfriend about what makes her climax and ask for him to give oral sex. Any boyfriend would want to please his partner because it's pretty insulting if you cannot satisfy your partner's needs. It also makes you quite selfish and distant not to be proactive and considerate about that sort of thing; it is in part a product of the 'lad culture', i.e. those who attempt to hide their crippling insecurities by deluding themselves that they only have sex for their own benefit and are horribly scared about being labelled "whipped", despite the fact that any self-respecting and secure man would want to please his partner and enjoy this achievement as much as climaxing himself. In other words, OP, if your boyfriend is secure, confident in his abilities, and a reasonable, considerate man, then simply be more open and honest with him. There's nothing worse than playing games, making subtle hints, and beating around the bush (pardon the pun).
    I wonder if you read the original poster thread carefully. The OP stated frankly " . I don't want to have to outright ask him to do it because I think that's kinda unsexy" Not everybody can open up like you. Some find it so difficult to do so. Sometime, indirect MSGs can give a great result without taking the courage to spit it out. Thanks for the comment.
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    (Original post by macromicro)
    He said "tell" which is ambiguous I suppose and seems to fall between your authoritative interpretation of "demand' and my more generous interpretation of "ask" but I think the clear implication, and his subsequent explanation, was indeed "ask". It's really not that complicated to be honest; I think we're all generally on the same page.
    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Intellectual honesty and humility are virtues; methinks y'all would do well to remember that :top2:

    The clear implication from his subsequent rewording is that he meant to say ask,* yes, and we are indeed all on the same page in that respect
    'Ask' is close to the word I meant, but I didn't want to say 'ask' because it has implications of its own. If I'd said, "ask him to go down on you," then I think that's like advising OP to say to her bf, "would you go down on me?", which isn't what I meant. I meant to advise her to say to him, in the context of a sexual interaction, "go down on me," in the way a person would speak to their lover in the bedroom. It's not a demand, it's a request, but it's one that maintains sexual confidence. I assume the OP wouldn't have taken it as a recommendation to demand, so I don't think it's all that ambiguous.

    Needless to say, I didn't expect to have to spell out the semantics of what I wrote, or else maybe I would have been more careful in my terminology, but then again it's TSR, so maybe I should've seen this coming. :top2:
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    when you are making out or having foreplay et cetera then just ask him then and it wont feel weird
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Ah, so you did mean issue an instruction after all! Vindicated twice over, poor macromicro :sad:

    Demand: 'an urgent or peremptory requirement or request'. Let's say no more of spelling out semantics, shall we brother? :top2:
    Thanks for completely derailing the thread.
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    Please can we keep this on topic and sensible, any posts that are sexually explicit or posts that are unhelpful and rude, will be removed, thanks.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks for completely derailing the thread
    If you work your way back to my OP you'll see that I was warning of the potential fallout from following advice that suggested you should (bluntly) 'tell' (instruct) the guy to perform a sex act on you. You yourself said you didn't want to ask him outright as it would be unsexy, well for many men instructing them in the sack is even more unsexy, and may even get you laughed at (which would no doubt potentially make you feel terrible/angry). My intention was only ever to warn of this

    If you are unappreciative of this raised concern, or feel I should allow certain people to make like I'm somehow at fault for interpreting basic language in line with both its intended and literal meaning (rather than embracing the truth in my warning), then that's too bad :dontknow: That it derailed the thread is regrettable, but I will never bend over for such people, sozchops
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