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I'm 21 and I have absolutely no friends. watch

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    im exactly the same! 21 with social anxiety and no friends at all
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    I have no friends either i feel like people just dont wanna know me or they think that i dont want people to bother e which is true sometimes but i just want some friends that care about me. Theres no one like me out tere though
    • Welcome Squad
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    Welcome Squad
    Join gaming society of the uni. You will have lots of friends
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    Uni is built for people who need to make friends! There must be a gaming society and if not then start one! They give you a reason to talk to people that isn't just "nice weather we are having"..
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    You dont need friends, all you need is facebook and your sorted for life
    • Welcome Squad
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    Welcome Squad
    (Original post by lucylocket118)
    I have no friends either i feel like people just dont wanna know me or they think that i dont want people to bother e which is true sometimes but i just want some friends that care about me. Theres no one like me out tere though
    not personally addressing to you, but rather what's in the content.

    In general at uni and college, I always went to people making conversations and I was the one making effort, first step.
    Now, I personally wouldn't approach uninviting person who sends vibes "do not bother me". I guess when you get older meaning of friendship changes.

    I know people who I talk once every 2-3 weeks, just generic "hi, how are you doing", we might even go for a coffee once every 4-6 months, but they are not my friends, and I would be disturbed if the assumed I'm their close friends.

    Whereas, I have friend who I would talk few times a week, I see in person almost everyday, and I can talk personal private matters, share past experiences and that person is there for me anytime, same as I'm there for her anytime.

    If you just want to have people around you and talk random things about jobs/education/movies best option is to join societies and clubs at uni.otherwise, I don't think friendship works one way unless the other person is even more desperate to have friends. Still I personally don't see anything long term with that kind of friendships.
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    Hi!

    I just wanted to say I completely relate to your situation - I had exactly the same issues at the first uni I went to, with no friends and so on. I also suffer from very significant social anxiety, and am still trying to work through how to deal with this now.

    As a side note, I have very similar interests to yourself. If you want to PM me, very happy to get chatting.
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    I'll be your friend :console:
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    You got to love your own company, you were born alone, you'll die alone. You need to master the art of being alone.
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    I know how weird this may sound, but I only got friends recently...I'm 15 and home-ed, and found it near-impossible to actually meet anyone. When I went to activities, sports, Warhammer 40,00, that sorta thing, all the school kids just formed their cliquey little groups and wouldn't even look at me. It seems it can be quite hard to integrate yourself with any social group if you're not Like Them, and I'm really not at all Like Them. Thankfully, I got lucky and kind of got "adopted" by the nerdy table of one of the nearby schools, and even though I don't go, we're all great friends. I know how lonely and sad this sounds, but we really bond over CS:GO...Bear in mind that even if you're not directly friends with people, just chat to them. The more you talk to someone, the more they feel they know you and the more likely they are to count you as a friend. I mean, the group of people I know only numbers 4, but I met them all through just one of them. "Focus your efforts" as it were on one person, they might introduce to their social circles so you get to be a cliquey person who doesn't talk to anyone else too . Hope this helps!

    Also, as Multitalented Me said up above, feel free to PM me about anything, I'll always listen!
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    Ouch OP!

    For people to get bored of you so quickly what do you talk about usually? If it's.. Complex topics then try going a little more casual with topics?

    I'd personally recommend seeing if your uni has any societies that coincide with your interests. As for online, why not try checking the gaming forum?

    As many people on here have said, why not try sending them a PM? :gthumb:
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    Well, I'm in the same position as you. I dont have social anxiety but I do have a anxiety disorder so I do understand how you feel. I am 21 female and also have no friends at all... None.. not when I was in College for 4 years!, now I work and am close with my coworker but only at work. I game online but to shy to talk to anyone. Its sucks lol
    • Community Assistant
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    Community Assistant
    Sit next to someone in lectures and tutorials and say "hey, how are you finding the course" "what topics are you interested in".

    I hope this helps:

    1) Relax, imagine you're just observing or there as a traveller. For example, if you are on holiday, you go there to experience and observe the attraction, you're not going to get anxious doing that are you?

    2) Smile, smiling in contagious.

    3) Be confident, respect yourself, accept yourself, work out, wear good clothes, feel good, focus on your passions, know you are a good person who treats people well, think positively, be proud of yourself, do things that make you happy, remember your happy times, what makes you confident? What makes you proud? Do you have a skill you are good at? Do things like cooking, driving, learning that increases your confidence daily.

    4) Dress well, have good grooming, hairstyle, have good posture.

    5) Just say hi or hey to people in your vicinity, who cares if they don't say anything back?

    6) Ask how they are, how's everything, what made them choose this course, their plans for the future, their plans for the rest of the day, weekend, how was their weekend, what they will get up to, what they got up to, ask them about their hobbies, talk about the weather or did you see that sports game? Just mingle with them, compliment them, say "I like your jacket".

    If you know they went on a holiday or somewhere, ask them about it etc.

    7) Be passionate about life.

    8) Lighten up, have a laugh, laugh easily, be friendly, approachable, interested, relaxed.

    9) Look outside!
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    I'm in the exact same position, if you would like to talk (or anyone else on here who feels the same) then feel free to message me on here as we could all help each other
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    18 Here about to go to Uni. I really struggle socially, both with having the confidence to say hi and having anything to add. I'm starting to improve, and just say what's on my mind to people and generally they will be open to talk. Alot of people love Gaming and movies, you can start a conversation on those, or try join in one. I am going to really struggle meeting new people because before I've had a mutual friend that I've been able to join conversations through, but on my own going to be tough. I'm guessing Societies will help
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    hey im nethaniel from sydney hornsby i just lost all my friends because they wherent who i thought they where maybe if ur local go chill after work hit up a coffee
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey guys,

    I'm not really sure how to start this, I'm just sort of wondering if anyone else is in a similar position to me.

    I'm 21 (female) and have no friends (I know how pathetic that sounds). I'm in my second year at uni and it's so miserable having to attend lectures and seminars alone, it feels like it must be really obvious to other people how alone I am and it's embarrassing. I have tried hard to connect with others but I have terrible social anxiety, making it pretty difficult, and the people I have spoken with/met online always seem to get bored with me very quickly. I'm not sure what to do.

    Interests: Gaming, social justice, feminism, movies etc
    "social justice, feminism" no wonder you have no friends
 
 
 
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