Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Trapz99)
    Love for one's parents is unconditional- no matter what your parents have done, you should love them and aim to resolve your differences in opinion. Disliking your own mother is completely and utterly wrong in every way.
    To be honest, that's not fair. What something should be and what it is in reality is different. A lot of kids do not connect with their parents and there's usually a reason; not all mothers and fathers do well by their kids.

    What you say is an ideal and would be nice, but it isn't quite realistic.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Pal, come on. There is no way you can gage that from what the user said; you sound, really, as though you cannot accept that life isn't an ideal. Not all parents do well by their kids. There are a lot of parents out there who should never have had children.

    You should probably try and respect the differences and just be thankful that you haven't had the same experience and approach!
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Listers)
    Exactly.


    Some people are just ungrateful and disrespectful.
    Just be grateful you have a mother you can love.

    (Original post by Trapz99)
    Love for one's parents is unconditional- no matter what your parents have done, you should love them and aim to resolve your differences in opinion. Disliking your own mother is completely and utterly wrong in every way.
    Yes, even if they abuse and attack you in every way possible. You should love them even while they kill you little by little, while they contribute to your depression and anxiety. Yes, even those child sex abusers deserve our love. Even those mothers that abandon us and say they want nothing to do with us. They can literally sell us to pimps for 50 pounds and a mars bar but according to this genius, we should still love them unconditionally.

    PS. There are parents like this out there. Count your lucky stars you never encountered one.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    A general rule of thumb is that it's a good idea to try and cut out all the people in your life who are toxic and have a negative effect on you. That goes for family too. I mean, they might have raised you, but it doesn't mean you have to love and put up with their *****y/abusive personalities. Even then you can still take care of them, just minus the love.
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Eva.Gregoria)
    Just be grateful you have a mother you can love.



    Yes, even if they abuse and attack you in every way possible. You should love them even while they kill you little by little, while they contribute to your depression and anxiety. Yes, even those child sex abusers deserve our love. Even those mothers that abandon us and say they want nothing to do with us. They can literally sell us to pimps for 50 pounds and a mars bar but according to this genius, we should still love them unconditionally.

    PS. There are parents like this out there. Count your lucky stars you never encountered one.
    They still deserve a chance of receiving forgiveness and they should make amends. If they are mentally unstable, then the child should realise that it's not necessarily the parent's fault and should continue to love them while staying away from them.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ivybridge)
    My mum and my dad have hurt me a lot in many ways but they've also broke their backs and gone without to provide me and my brother with a pretty privileged lifestyle and my parents have done everything they can to protect and help me, even when they have misinterpreted what was best.

    Even though I'm quite sure they won't want to know me when I choose to get married or have a relationship, I'm still grateful for everything they have done and at the end of the day, they brought me into this world and cared for me through the years. There's no two people who deserve my respect and love more, regardless of anything else.
    There's a lot more to being a parent than just providing food and shelter you know. Emotional abuse affects children throughout their life, and never goes away. I'd rather have a deep and meaningful relationship with my parents than have a privileged lifestyle btw.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Eva.Gregoria)
    There's a lot more to being a parent than just providing food and shelter you know. Emotional abuse affects children throughout their life, and never goes away. I'd rather have a deep and meaningful relationship with my parents than have a privileged lifestyle btw.
    Yes but this was my experience and my response to it... without being rude, have you not read the posts I just made in your defence?
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    My family arent very pda but we still love eachother
    I can't imagine my life without my mum in it
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Trapz99)
    They still deserve a chance of receiving forgiveness and they should make amends. If they are mentally unstable, then the child should realise that it's not necessarily the parent's fault and should continue to love them while staying away from them.
    Yeah I can't take you seriously anymore, this comment is absolutely ridiculous.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Trapz99)
    They still deserve a chance of receiving forgiveness and they should make amends. If they are mentally unstable, then the child should realise that it's not necessarily the parent's fault and should continue to love them while staying away from them.
    Nah, sorry mate - not in the cases the user gave. Stop thinking the Ten Commandments speak all and should be unconditionally followed, lololol.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Eva.Gregoria)
    Yeah I can't take you seriously anymore, this comment is absolutely ridiculous.
    100% agree.
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Ok I'm done. I just feel that a child's love for parents and family members should be unconditional- I accept that my views have been influenced by my religion, but that's my take. I'll respect your opinion while disagreeing entirely with it.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ivybridge)
    Yes but this was my experience and my response to it... without being rude, have you not read the posts I just made in your defence?
    This isn't a court of law, I wasn't attacking you with my comment just giving you my opinion on what you said.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Your mother sounds like one of those vicious wicked drug filled crazy mothers whose just looking to reach out to their kids but don't know the right way to do it, and explode into a rage of emotions at the slightest chance.
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    TSR Support Team
    I used to feel nothing but disappointment and anger towards my mum. I wouldn't go as far to say I absolutely hated her but I had no respect for her and was disappointed in her. While I was growing up, she left me with my grandparents to go out with men and even told them she didn't have a kid and I was her sister and generally do everything but be a mum to me. When we were together we would argue, physically fight, she would say I was the reason she didn't have friends or a man and all that crap. This went on since I was a child right until I moved out when I was 18. I didn't call her mum, I called her by her first name up until we made up fully when I was 21/22.

    She also tried to split me and my partner up. She told my college at the time I was on drugs and I was getting abused which was absolute nonsense and we didn't talk for 2 years after that.

    We made up 3 years ago and ever since its been brilliant. I didn't believe people could change but she did. She isn't perfect but now I am her number one priority, she texts me every minute of the day nearly, her and my bf get on really well now and we see each other most days and we haven't argued since we made up.

    My mum had some mental problems when she was my age and she was abused by my dad and she didn't realise she took it out on me and that led to us not having a relationship while I was growing up but she has seen what she has done and sought help and forever regrets the way things went but is glad we managed to fix things before it was too late.

    Thinking back on the old her, I still feel resentment in the pit of my stomach because at times she was evil and I partly blame her for some of the problems I have but she's changed and I focus on that instead and she can't do enough for me now and each day we learn more and more about each other
    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ivybridge)
    Nah, sorry mate - not in the cases the user gave. Stop thinking the Ten Commandments speak all and should be unconditionally followed, lololol.
    You will find that in 99.9% of comments like these, the user is usually a Christian/Muslim/other religion. Just learn to think for yourselves people!

    (Don't ask me where I got my stats from, I completely made it up)
    • #3
    #3

    Anyhow if you don't really connect with your parents that means you're one step closer to being Batman
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    I kind of understand in a way but I kind of dunno if I don't love her. I am not close to her and we don't ever have conversations she has always acted like I am annoying to her like she dislikes me but I try not to think about it.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I don't like my mum, she's overprotective, does not let me do anything, and gives me no space whatsoever, and she treats me badly when my brothers are around, and treats me horribly when they aren't.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Eva.Gregoria)
    This isn't a court of law, I wasn't attacking you with my comment just giving you my opinion on what you said.
    You're being a bit rude... I know you were but I clearly know there's more to it than supporting financially and providing - that was largely my argument in the posts I made defending your position.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: June 6, 2016
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Would you like to hibernate through the winter months?
    Useful resources
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.