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Girlfriend doesn't go down on me watch

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    (Original post by xylas)
    No problem it's quite simple. When you wrote "is getting a blowjob really more important than ur love for her?" that is a ridiculous comparison to make.

    By what criteria are you judging one to be more important than the other? They are completely different things so any answers to this question are completely meaningless.
    I get what u are trying to say that they are different things, and that i should not compare them but, i was just trying to say, that it is kind of silly to decide break up with someone over a blow job, like if he really liked her, then he wouldn't decide to break up with her over something like this, as he could always sort it out by discussing with her
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    (Original post by infairverona)
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    I've given justification - I think it's childish to prioritise sex when you are in a relationship with someone you claim to like. If it was just a friend with benefits or something sure, but I would have thought feelings towards someone are more important in a relationship than whether or not they will do every sexual act that you demand of them. With stuff like this there is never a right or wrong answer - what's right for me is obviously not what's right for OP - I am just giving my opinion as I see it differently. If you haven't read what I've posted and can't seem to grasp why I've said what I've said - despite the fact that I've now repeated it a third time for you - then that's your problem
    "I think it's childish" - insult not a reason.

    "every sexual act" - OP is just talking about blowjob here

    "what's right for me is obviously not what's right for OP" - finally you agree with me

    "I've now repeated it a third time for you" - incorrect, but even if you did that is not the same as giving a reason.

    "then that's your problem" - this post shows otherwise
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    (Original post by x-bhakti-patel)
    I get what u are trying to say that they are different things, and that i should not compare them but, i was just trying to say, that it is kind of silly to decide break up with someone over a blow job, like if he really liked her, then he wouldn't decide to break up with her over something like this, as he could always sort it out by discussing with her
    I agree he should discuss with her first. But if nothing changes then it is not "silly" for the reasons I told you.
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    (Original post by xylas)
    I agree he should discuss with her first. But if nothing changes then it is not "silly" for the reasons I told you.
    I get what u mean now
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    (Original post by xylas)
    "I think it's childish" - insult not a reason.

    "every sexual act" - OP is just talking about blowjob here

    "what's right for me is obviously not what's right for OP" - finally you agree with me

    "I've now repeated it a third time for you" - incorrect, but even if you did that is not the same as giving a reason.

    "then that's your problem" - this post shows otherwise
    Your lack of comprehension skills is genuinely painful. Nothing I have said is anything less of a 'reason' than anything you have yourself said in giving your own view. I have never said that my opinion is prescriptive for all people - I have simply put my view across, as has everyone else.
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    (Original post by infairverona)
    Where do you draw the line with that though? What if you have a kink that your partner doesn't share and doesn't like, would you still expect them to just get over it and do it, making them uncomfortable in the meantime, because you like something and expect your partner to please you? Obviously in this context we are talking just about blowjobs but how far would you extend that principle? I would not ever want someone to do something to me/with me that they didn't want to do. Knowing someone doesn't want to do it that much and is ONLY doing it because you've demanded it would not be enjoyable for me
    I respect everyone. I accept that some people might not like things about me, I accept and respect people who might never want to have sex, I accept and respect people who only want to have sex to conceive children, I accept and respect people who might only want to have sex with the lights off, that's totally fine with me and more power to them, but I will not be dating them. If someone doesn't want to do something that I want that's fine, I will find someone else who does. I am not going to resort to begging or worse feeling rejected because I don't need to. I have had my fair share of mediocre sex and that is not something I will ever settle for.
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    (Original post by Alba2013)
    I respect everyone. I accept that some people might not like things about me, I accept and respect people who might never want to have sex, I accept and respect people who only want to have sex to conceive children, I accept and respect people who might only want to have sex with the lights off, that's totally fine with me and more power to them, but I will not be dating them. If someone doesn't want to do something that I want that's fine, I will find someone else who does. I am not going to resort to begging or worse feeling rejected because I don't need to. I have had my fair share of mediocre sex and that is not something I will ever settle for.
    Yeah I get that you respect everyone but what would you do? Do you have certain things you like and you ask guys first if they're ok with it before you date them or what? And if you're in a relationship with someone and it becomes apparent that they have a kink and you don't like it, would you just go along with it anyway to please them? I'm just curious about how logistically that works for you
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    Talk to her about it and if she doesn't respond appropriately break up with her.... Sexual compatibility is so important
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    (Original post by infairverona)
    Yeah I get that you respect everyone but what would you do? Do you have certain things you like and you ask guys first if they're ok with it before you date them or what? And if you're in a relationship with someone and it becomes apparent that they have a kink and you don't like it, would you just go along with it anyway to please them? I'm just curious about how logistically that works for you
    There are many things I like that I can take or leave, then there are deal breakers, and oral is one of them. I can ask what they think about 'x' but the deal breakers are pretty apparent to me when they're not going to happen, and a couple of times of deal breakers being skipped I lose interest. Ain't nobody got time for that!

    Got to be honest, I never tried anything I didn't enjoy and yes, I have tried things that have been suggested by partners to please them and for the sake of trying new things, but had I not enjoyed them and them being one of my partner's 'deal breakers' I would accept we are not compatible and move on. You work out these things pretty early on anyway so not much is lost.

    Besides, this particular thread isn't about anything outrageous or hanging from the ceiling kind of thing, there are tons and tons of girls happy to give bjs specially when the guy is keen to reciprocate (hate that word), it's very intimate and it feels amazing and there is no need to hang on to someone who finds excuse after excuse while at the same time is happy to take it.

    Dump!
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    (Original post by infairverona)
    Your lack of comprehension skills is genuinely painful. Nothing I have said is anything less of a 'reason' than anything you have yourself said in giving your own view. I have never said that my opinion is prescriptive for all people - I have simply put my view across, as has everyone else.
    moot post
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    (Original post by infairverona)
    Of course you can be frustrated and you should talk to her about it more, but breaking up with her over it is weird and extreme if you claim to really like her
    Sexual compatibility is important to me in a relationship
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    Tell her how you feel. Do you value BJs more than her? because that's what it sounds like.
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    #1

    (Original post by Alba2013)
    There are many things I like that I can take or leave, then there are deal breakers, and oral is one of them. I can ask what they think about 'x' but the deal breakers are pretty apparent to me when they're not going to happen, and a couple of times of deal breakers being skipped I lose interest. Ain't nobody got time for that!

    Got to be honest, I never tried anything I didn't enjoy and yes, I have tried things that have been suggested by partners to please them and for the sake of trying new things, but had I not enjoyed them and them being one of my partner's 'deal breakers' I would accept we are not compatible and move on. You work out these things pretty early on anyway so not much is lost.

    Besides, this particular thread isn't about anything outrageous or hanging from the ceiling kind of thing, there are tons and tons of girls happy to give bjs specially when the guy is keen to reciprocate (hate that word), it's very intimate and it feels amazing and there is no need to hang on to someone who finds excuse after excuse while at the same time is happy to take it.

    Dump!
    Thank you. At least someone understands.
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    (Original post by Trill)
    Tell her how you feel. Do you value BJs more than her? because that's what it sounds like.
    Receiving them is something I really enjoy. As said by a previous poster, a girl who gives BJs isn't rare and I don't want to give them up.
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    (Original post by AngryRedhead)
    Tell her you feel unappreciated because you going down on her is not reciprocated. Surely if you do this for her she should do it for you?
    If you regard oral sex as a favour, are perfectly forthcoming to that effect, and can be reasonably confident that your partner's own opposition to 'giving' isn't more rooted in genuine distaste or psychological aversion than yours; sure. Otherwise, this is a false equivalency.
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    That's not a reason to break up, unless sex is all you want in which case why get into a relationship?
    Talk to her about how you feel and why she doesn't like it. It could be a bad experience, how people may feel towards her (rude names and stuff), being shy or insecure about her abilities, anything. Talk about it before you act.
    I like to do it for my boyfriend, not because I find it particularly nice (and I'm hugely insecure about my abilities) but because he likes it, he does it for me and I love his reactions and therefore get more into it and enjoy it. I like to make him happy
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    Sucks to be you! :laugh:

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    doesn't give blowjobs yet loves me going down on her (which I do)
    A moment's silence for our brother in the cuck-zone :sad:

    will one day
    Oh well that's ok then

    I am considering breaking up with her over this
    Third option: ultimatum
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    mental bruvh. she obviously doesnt care about your willy. DUMP
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's not a reason to break up, unless sex is all you want in which case why get into a relationship?
    Talk to her about how you feel and why she doesn't like it. It could be a bad experience, how people may feel towards her (rude names and stuff), being shy or insecure about her abilities, anything. Talk about it before you act.
    I like to do it for my boyfriend, not because I find it particularly nice (and I'm hugely insecure about my abilities) but because he likes it, he does it for me and I love his reactions and therefore get more into it and enjoy it. I like to make him happy
    It isnt but is still an important aspect.
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    #4

    Not all girls like giving oral. I don't, because I have a really strong gagging reflex, which my ex knew but still expressed his disappointment often which made me feel rubbish. It's up to you, I guess it depends on how much you want to be with her compares to how important it is for you to receive oral sex. If the latter is more important I suggest you don't try to pressure her into it and end the relationship instead.
 
 
 
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