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how to tell my parents im pregnant

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Yup, go with *Katie*!!!! That's far more sensible than I could have managed.
Reply 41
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
we have only been together for around 4months which isnt long at all, and i feel as though this has happend extremely quickly.
we both have jobs, im part time where as he's full time, and he has also said he will stand by me no matter what happens, we may also end up moving in with each other if my parents dont accept it.
I've been in this situation quite recently, but decided to have an abortion. Even so, the scariest thing I had to do in the whole process was tell my mother. I nearly didn't.

They're your parents, they love you nomatter what, and even if they are angry at first, or more likely shocked and upset that they couldn't protect you from this, they will support you and help you. Speak slowly and clearly, and say it simply - there is no way to break this news gently. Explain what has happened, explain your reasons for doing what you're doing, and ask for their help.

I'm reserving judgement on your decision to keep the baby - I hope things work out with you and your boyfriend. I know this is not an easy thing, but there's no way round it. Your parents would probably be mortified to think you didn't feel you could tell them. So tell THEM, not a tutor or a friend. It might be scary, but it feels better when you've done it. Good luck.
Reply 43
Avatar for Elleee
Elleee
katiex
She won't be just judged by me though, everyone is judgmental you should know, some people are just more reserved and won't say anything, i'm just saying most likely what the general public would be thinking if they say her pushing her pram in the street. .


not all of the general public will judge her on this, a lot realise this is the 21st century, most teenagers have sex and accidents can happen.

my sisters 18 and has just got pregnant, she told my dad just straight forward, and he was a bit shocked at first and seemed dissapointed, but he went with her to her first scan and came out really amazed talking about how you could see the heartbeat
yours will probably be similar, they might be in shock and seem dissapointed at first, but they'll accept it

good luck with everything that happens!
Reply 44
Avatar for Dionysus
Dionysus
15
Firstly, I think you've made the right decision. Whilst I'm not fundamentally anti-abortion, I feel it shouldn't be used just to make life more convenient. You're obviously capable of looking after your baby. Secondly, congratulations! It's not something to be ashamed of - it's a good thing, even if it's happened a bit earlier than you intended. Tell your parents sooner rather than later - they'll obviously be shocked but I'm sure they'll come to accept it. It's their grandchild after all!
Reply 45
Avatar for Tufts
Tufts
17
Anonymous
he has also said he will stand by me no matter what happens


Chick, a lot of men say that...until the screaming baby comes along and takes away his freedom. A lot of men are genuine. A lot arn't. After 4 months, how can you tell that his statement was trustworthy?
Reply 46
Avatar for Tufts
Tufts
17
Cage
You're obviously capable of looking after your baby.


And you've measured that how?
Reply 47
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Tufts
Chick, a lot of men say that...until the screaming baby comes along and takes away his freedom. A lot of men are genuine. A lot arn't. After 4 months, how can you tell that his statement was trustworthy?


he has a 4 year old son from his 1st marriage and still stands by him, and always has donem so i know i can trust him to be there for the kid
You are going to have to tell your parents definitely. Maybe sit your mammy down on her own to allow her to adjust to the shock first so it can be a little more neutral when you have to tell your dad? After all they don't even know you have a boyfriend.

But I'd be slightly wary especially with the age gap. Are you sure he's going to commit to you pre and post baby? There's a few questions you are going to have to ask yourself first. Are you actually ready to be a mother? Can you provide for a baby at this time? Will your family help out? etc

There's a lot more to having a baby than meets the eye. Some parents can be great about it others can't. You have to realistic and very mature throughout this whole process and don't shun away into a little fantasy land where it's your baby and 'I can do what I want' :rolleyes:
Reply 49
Avatar for Tufts
Tufts
17
Anonymous
he has a 4 year old son from his 1st marriage and still stands by him


Ouch. You're just one of a collection babe.

If you dont mind my asking, how did he seperate with the first mother of his child?
picking the best moment is key
good luck
Reply 51
Avatar for Cowz
Cowz
Anonymous
ive just come here to ask for advice on the best way to tell them, its not as if this was planned, we used a condon which unfortunetly split and i was unable to take the morning after pill due to not being able to swallow pills.
all im asking for is some helpful advice, not someone to have a go at me saying that im bitching or whatever


First of all condoms don't just split-a lad should know. Second of all, our bringing a life into this world on the premise that you couldn't swallow a pill-so basically you've admitted you don't really want the baby but haven't got a clue what your doing. Are you sure your ready for parenthood?

I mean I could forgive you, but your boyfriend is 27 for dogs sake, he should know what he is doing. Infact, I think he does and he is unfairly tricking you into motherhood.

Anonymous
we have only been together for around 4months which isnt long at all, and i feel as though this has happend extremely quickly.
we both have jobs, im part time where as he's full time, and he has also said he will stand by me no matter what happens, we may also end up moving in with each other if my parents dont accept it.


Well this just confirms my fears. So it 'happened extremely quickly' and yet you are now six weeks pregnant. What made you decide to keep the baby? You can forget working when its born-and standing by the girl who he got pregnant (and I believe intentionally) is hardly a courageous move by your boyfriend. This whole thing stinks. Seriously, I wouldn't trust your boyfriend if I was you. It seems obvious that you don't want the baby and yet even though your boyfriend is 27 he has hardly 'stood by you' and explained that you don't have to take a flipping pill to avoid getting pregnant. JEESH!

Go tell your parents, and listen to them! It is totally unfair for your boyfriend to have forced such a life changing event as this on you.

EDIT:To actually tell them, call them up and say your coming over to tell them (they'll probably guess what from the tone of your voice etc.). Then sit them down in the front room and start by saying something like "it happened so fast that I didn't know what to do, but now I'm pregnant and scared" -pretty much what my sister said.
Reply 52
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
she started causing loads of rows between them, moaning at him 24/7 about working to much, but he was the only one with a job between them so was paying for everything so had 2 work as much as he could, to pay everything off, she was also his 1st ever girlfriend.
i do have some experience in looking after young children as i was often left looking after my younger sister from when she was around 10 months old as both my parents worked full time, i then moved on to do voluntary work in a primary school working with various ages.
Reply 53
Avatar for vialli25
vialli25
Forgive me for not being as optimistic as other people in this thread but it seriously sounds like you're throwing your life away.

I realise I don't exactly know the whole situation etc but I would seriously consider having an abortion.

You've been with your boyfriend for four months, he's 27 and your 18 and you want to have a baby together?

How do you know next week he won't get fed up with you or vice versa, or even one year down the line.

He's 27, he's experienced a lot more of what life has to offer for young adults, you're just getting started!!!

Think about what it means to be a mother, you can't just dump your baby on your parents when you feel like going clubbing or to a party as that's not fair to them or the baby. Being a mother is a full time job - the novelty will soon wear off.

What about the financial side of things? Sure your boyfriend will support you but it will still be tough. Especially as you only have a part time job. You'll have to pay for food, toys, a cot, clothes, nappies and loads more!

I'm only trying to make you realise the harsh reality - wouldn't you prefer to find someone that really means something to you and settle down properly, after you've experienced all the things life has to offer?

At the end of the day, just my opinion, you know your situation a lot better than a stranger like me and you need to make your own decision. Just don't be naive.

Good luck telling your parents. x
Reply 54
Avatar for Elleee
Elleee
Cowz

Go tell your parents, and listen to them! It is totally unfair for your boyfriend to have forced such a life changing event as this on you.


they both consented to having sex, so he hardly 'forced' it on her, its not just upto a man to take precautions
Reply 55
Avatar for Tufts
Tufts
17
Cowz
First of all condoms don't just split-a lad should know.


Least we forget that he aleready got someone pregnant before her :eek:
Tufts
Least we forget that he aleready got someone pregnant before her :eek:



Nor let us forget there is another way of emergency contraception other than the morning after....
Reply 57
Avatar for Tufts
Tufts
17
vialli25


What about the financial side of things? Sure your boyfriend will support you


And the other kid he has :eek:
Reply 58
Avatar for vialli25
vialli25
Lol yea missed that detail!
Reply 59
Avatar for Sithius
Sithius
16
Why was my post deleted? It's clearly a troll. Look at the attitude.

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