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    Leave him alone to find someone who will treat him right. You need to move on, learn from this and not f*** up like this ever again.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    Like I said, I didn't mean what I said in that stupid thread. Please ignore whatever I posted in that thread. I don't know. It was just a mistake. I think I do.
    That thread aside, then the money thing might be neither here nor there. Depends how much money and whether they needed it or you had permission. For instance if you had stolen it or gone against his express wishes then its dump city for you. Iften less about the money, but a breach of trust.


    If you have cheated though most people would send their partner to dumpsville. Its a betrayal and shows you cnat be trusted or dont care about your partner enough.

    Not sure why you think you deserve forgiving? Clearly its up to him.
    Tbh once you have broken trust in a relationship it will never be the same.

    I suppose if you wnated him to forgive you then he would have to believe he could trust you and that you were sincere. he would know better than us. You could start by paying the money back.

    Does he know about the cheating?
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    (Original post by Natalierm2707)
    For me physical intimacy is a big part of a relationship, and by breaching the trust to be monogamous and only with your partner you are emotionally cheating on them, it doesnt matter how you felt or how it happened, i have very little sympathy for cheaters excuses.

    I would NEVER forgive someone if they passionately kissed with intention, did sexual acts or slept with anyone else. Trust me i have friends who have been paralytic drunk and even then they say that it takes thought and intention to choose to go back with someone and sleep with them, they all agree that in no way is that an accident unless they were spiked and passed out. And then it would basically be rape (which is a whole different ball game).

    If you took your pants off and betrayed the monogamy you promised to your partner your a cheater, spontaneous or not you had the opprtunity to stay true to your relationship and walk away, but your just another dirty cheater... Trust me your partner deserves a faithful partner.


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    Well, you have the right to your own opinion.. But I don't fully agree with it.

    (Original post by xobeauty)
    Im not being rude, did you not say you suffer from depression?

    Stop hurting people. Learn how to be ok on your own.
    I guess I'm kind of using the term depression loosely here. I think this is just the way I am, that's my personality I'm not on any meds. How am I supposed to learn something like that?
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    Well, you have the right to your own opinion.. But I don't fully agree with it.


    I guess I'm kind of using the term depression loosely here. I think this is just the way I am, that's my personality I'm not on any meds. How am I supposed to learn something like that?
    No i do agree its my opinion and you really dont have to agree, i just put it forward as you asked if i would forgive in your OP.

    Good luck to you, really hope whatever happens you live a happy life x


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    (Original post by Kekio_)
    Leave him alone to find someone who will treat him right. You need to move on, learn from this and not f*** up like this ever again.
    I don't want to do that.

    (Original post by 999tigger)
    That thread aside, then the money thing might be neither here nor there. Depends how much money and whether they needed it or you had permission. For instance if you had stolen it or gone against his express wishes then its dump city for you. Iften less about the money, but a breach of trust.


    If you have cheated though most people would send their partner to dumpsville. Its a betrayal and shows you cnat be trusted or dont care about your partner enough.

    Not sure why you think you deserve forgiving? Clearly its up to him.
    Tbh once you have broken trust in a relationship it will never be the same.

    I suppose if you wnated him to forgive you then he would have to believe he could trust you and that you were sincere. he would know better than us. You could start by paying the money back.

    Does he know about the cheating?
    It was less than £500. But it wasn't money for rent or anything important like that. He's the one supporting me financially so he doesn't mind me having access to his account. The reason why he's so annoyed is because of what I spent the money on, not even the fact that I took it. I can't really pay it back now... I don't work.
    Of course, I know it's up to him. But I just wanted to know peoples opinions on this. I thought that maybe someone will come up with a creative way to say sorry... but guess not.
    And yeah, he does know about the fact that I cheated on him.
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    (Original post by Hype en Ecosse)
    Yeah, if you were his man, you would be gay.

    Because he's a man.
    Plot twist Im gay. see my other thread
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    (Original post by Natalierm2707)
    No i do agree its my opinion and you really dont have to agree, i just put it forward as you asked if i would forgive in your OP.

    Good luck to you, really hope whatever happens you live a happy life x


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    I know, you are right. I guess it just wasn't what I wanted to hear. But I totally understand it.
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    (Original post by HandsomeStud)
    Plot twist Im gay. see my other thread
    What difference does it make? My sexuality's got nothing to do with this. Cheating is cheating.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    I know, you are right. I guess it just wasn't what I wanted to hear. But I totally understand it.
    If i was in your situation i would want to hear it either, i went through the situation on the other end (fine my bf never slept with someone else, he was just kissed on a night out very very drunk and then a bunch of lies got muddled - basically long story short we both misunderstood eachother and i blew the situation way bigger than it was). And it feels horrible, you feel used and your trust is broken, i did forgive my bf because he didnt cheat, it was a real accident and he changed to avoid getting into similar situations.

    If things dont go your way then learn from it, dont make the same mistakes agian x


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    Have you cheated on him before? Was this one more than once?

    He could forgive you becayse he likes you or he believes you? He might feel sorry for you? He might want to use it as leverage in the future.

    There are plenty of ways to say sorry, but it depends on sincerity imo.
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    The question is what do you have to offer him?

    If you're not offering much or your offerings include coitus let him move on; from what you're saying he's not coming back to you so you need to make one hell of a gesture.
    Be empathetic and sincere, but to take into account that it will be very hard for him to believe; plus he occupies the moral high-ground
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    It's fine, it's not your fault. The gender sings are no longer visible, that's why people can't tell. I know I should but I just don't know how to. My life is just so pointless most of the time. I have no motivation to do anything.


    I hope he does.


    He found out. But I wasn't the one who told him. Our 'friend' did........ Which probably makes things even worse. He doesn't want the money back. It's just the fact what I spent it on that annoys him. He's the one supporting me financially anyway, I don't work. He knows I can't pay it back now.
    Just let him smash you in and that will be the end of it
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    (Original post by Natalierm2707)
    If i was in your situation i would want to hear it either, i went through the situation on the other end (fine my bf never slept with someone else, he was just kissed on a night out very very drunk and then a bunch of lies got muddled - basically long story short we both misunderstood eachother and i blew the situation way bigger than it was). And it feels horrible, you feel used and your trust is broken, i did forgive my bf because he didnt cheat, it was a real accident and he changed to avoid getting into similar situations.

    If things dont go your way then learn from it, dont make the same mistakes agian x


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    I see, glad it all worked out in the end.

    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Have you cheated on him before? Was this one more than once?

    He could forgive you becayse he likes you or he believes you? He might feel sorry for you? He might want to use it as leverage in the future.

    There are plenty of ways to say sorry, but it depends on sincerity imo.
    Yes I have. But it was a long time ago. I hope he does but things aren't looking too good at the moment.

    (Original post by xs4)
    The question is what do you have to offer him?

    If you're not offering much or your offerings include coitus let him move on; from what you're saying he's not coming back to you so you need to make one hell of a gesture.
    Be empathetic and sincere, but to take into account that it will be very hard for him to believe; plus he occupies the moral high-ground
    I don't know. Probably not much, apart from sex.
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    This is the first time I've heard that mood swings can cause you to jump in bed with another man. Usually that requires a lot of planning.

    Otherwise, have you tried therapy?
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    Sorry to say this, but don't bother. I don't expect him to take what you have done lightly and frankly unless he still had a little love for you, he may consider working things out.
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    (Original post by Another)
    This is the first time I've heard that mood swings can cause you to jump in bed with another man. Usually that requires a lot of planning.

    Otherwise, have you tried therapy?
    It was a one night stand, not an affair, so it wasn't planned. And I'm not saying that they've directly caused it.. Just that I wouldn't normally do this sort of thing. Therapy isn't for me. This is my personality and I've accepted it. That's all there is to it.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    It was a one night stand, not an affair, so it wasn't planned. And I'm not saying that they've directly caused it.. Just that I wouldn't normally do this sort of thing. Therapy isn't for me. This is my personality and I've accepted it. That's all there is to it.
    So you've accepted the fact that sometimes your personality makes you a hoe, you don't want to change anything about the fact that you can spontaneously change into a hoe at any given time of the year, and you want your boyfriend to forgive you

    Wut
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    (Original post by Another)
    So you've accepted the fact that sometimes your personality makes you a hoe, you don't want to change anything about the fact that you can spontaneously change into a hoe at any given time of the year, and you want your boyfriend to forgive you

    Wut
    You know I wasn't talking about that.... just about the mood shifts. But believe me, I actually tried. I even went to see a psychiatrist once. I have even tried stupid meds. And they just made everything worse. So I will never do it again.
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    (Original post by Ciel.)
    You know I wasn't talking about that.... just about the mood shifts. But believe me, I actually tried. I even went to see a psychiatrist once. I have even tried stupid meds. And they just made everything worse. So I will never do it again.
    I'm confused. Is it the mood swings making you have sex with other people, or would you have done it anyway on a good day?

    I'd advise seeing another therapist, one that doesn't recommend medication probably. Normally if someone cheated on me they'd be out the door the same day, but if they were willing to work through their mental issues with a professional then I would stay and help to support them

    If they aren't willing to change, they're out anyway.
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    (Original post by Another)
    I'm confused. Is it the mood swings making you have sex with other people, or would you have done it anyway on a good day?

    I'd advise seeing another therapist, one that doesn't recommend medication probably. Normally if someone cheated on me they'd be out the door the same day, but if they were willing to work through their mental issues with a professional then I would stay and help to support them

    If they aren't willing to change, they're out anyway.
    I'm not saying that they are directly causing that, they just.. tend to influence my decisions a lot I guess. Make me reckless/impulsive. But no, I normally wouldn't do that.
    I've given up on 'therapists', though. They can't help me.
 
 
 
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