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Do not no what to do! cheated on my long term relationship... shall i break up? Watch

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    (Original post by elmosandy)
    lol you cheated though with a married man & make a revenge plan for when your then-after boyfriend cheated on you lol
    How can you drag someone that you don't know like that?


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    (Original post by markova21)
    OK. I think everyone is being a bit harsh on the OP. She's still a teenager, for God's sake. If she can't make mistakes at this point in her life when can she? I get the impression from what she says that the relationship has probably run its course. I think the kindest thing you can do OP is to tell your boyfriend you no longer have feelings for him and want to end it. Yes, he will be upset, but you can't possibly just stay with someone to keep THEM happy. That would be absurd. You would not only end up resenting him, you would end up hating him. Just a word of advice though . Don't try and remain "just good friends" with your boyfriend when or if you do split up. It never works and just messes both side's heads up. Make a clean break .
    It's not just a "mistake" though is it? It's a serious character flaw.
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    (Original post by inhuman)
    1. Little thing? You can forgive a lot but many people draw a line at this.

    2. "Recently, I can't be bothered with him, I can't be bothered kissing him and when we have sex, we just have sex, we don't make love (haha)."
    But you're also forgetting that she is 17 years old.

    If people decide to draw the line in this, then that's their own. But, if they are looking for something worthwhile, they have to be able to solve situations instead of running away from them.


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    (Original post by babyshawte)
    But you're also forgetting that she is 17 years old.

    If people decide to draw the line in this, then that's their own. But, if they are looking for something worthwhile, they have to be able to solve situations instead of running away from them.


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    This is not some silly mistake or misstep. This is a serious break of trust. I, and by the response on here, many people don't want to "solve" anything with a cheater.
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    (Original post by babyshawte)
    This is one of the reasons why a lot of you will struggle to maintain and build stronger relationships, because you don't know how to forgive. You will be the first people to divorce your husband or wife, once something goes wrong.

    Most of you act like people cannot be forgiven for their mistakes and find ways of improving on the situation.

    I'm not saying what the OP has done is acceptable, but sometimes people realise that what they have done was not a good idea after the situation has happened.

    Can't the situation be fixed?

    Why does every little thing have to result into "dump him/her"?

    Come on, y'all need to do better.


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    What are you on about. Forgiveness needs to be deserved. Your don't just forgive. The balance needs to be restored first.
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    (Original post by babyshawte)
    How can you drag someone that you don't know like that?


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    I'm sorry.

    Although I do feel, it's kinda biased coming from her especially her comments on ' Have you ever been cheated on http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show...4233706&page=2 based on that, i'm uncertain if she can make a thoughtful comment on this situation based on her views, sorry.

    (Original post by donutellme)
    What are you on about. Forgiveness needs to be deserved. Your don't just forgive. The balance needs to be restored first.
    ^ this. she needs to come clean and tell him what she did. Just come clean and say sorry and be done with.
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    I think by now you've got the point that cheating was not the best course of action. I'm not going to be harsh on you because I don't like to be, personally, but what you need to realise is that you simply just don't do these kind of things to people you love and leaving him is the very least you can do to do the best for him and make up for what you've done. You might think you're his world, and who knows maybe you are, but you are going to cause him permanent damage by staying with him. You can either tell him the truth and see if he decides to forgive you (but then you would have to ensure you never, ever do anything like this again) or you can tell him the truth a leave him which to me seems honest but may also just cause him more hurt than necessary. The thing is, you clearly are not in love with him so you only real option is for you to leave, because the fact you have already crossed the cheating lines simply means he deserves to find someone who will not cheat on him.

    You're 17 years old, and I know we all make mistakes when we're young, but I think you know well enough what you did is not okay and you need to be responsible and clean up your mess and not drag the poor boy through any more hurt than you may already have to.

    The thing is, it isn't a crime to fall out of love with your partner. You think he's boring, you're tired of being with him and basically he isn't giving you what you need. There's no issue there, it's just that instead of finding someone else (at that moment) you should have addressed these problems or at the very least just decided to leave. Cheating on someone is not good for anyone involved, not even you, because you're just going to feel guilt and regret over this. It always feels better, and cleaner, to dump someone you don't love before you even THINK about seeing someone else. You don't have to stay with someone you're unhappy with just because someone else isn't on the scene either. You don't have to go to this other guy if you break up with your boyfriend.

    TL;TR You have done wrong and you need to fix it by leaving a man you do not love (telling him the truth will be up to you) and allow him to be free from you. I hope one day you realise the hurt caused by cheating and that you won't cheat on future partners. If you only stay in relationships with people you are actually in love with, you hopefully won't feel the desire to do so.
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    Thank you all for your replies... Would just like to let you all know that I have decided to stay with my boyfriend but still also see the other boy, I like them both and they both satisfy my needs at this moment in time
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    (Original post by 253lwpm98)
    Thank you all for your replies... Would just like to let you all know that I have decided to stay with my boyfriend but still also see the other boy, I like them both and they both satisfy my needs at this moment in time
    Haha so you didn't listen to any of the advice here

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    (Original post by 253lwpm98)
    I do not no what to do!
    Improve your spelling.
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    (Original post by 253lwpm98)
    Thank you all for your replies... Would just like to let you all know that I have decided to stay with my boyfriend but still also see the other boy, I like them both and they both satisfy my needs at this moment in time
    Please, please just tell him what you did, it's better to respect him and come out with the truth, I would hate it if someone did this to me, omg why
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    (Original post by babyshawte)
    But you're also forgetting that she is 17 years old.

    If people decide to draw the line in this, then that's their own. But, if they are looking for something worthwhile, they have to be able to solve situations instead of running away from them.


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    Lol honestly she cheated, she needs to just come clean and break ties.
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    (Original post by 253lwpm98)

    But why do I keep wanting to see the other boy?
    Lust. obviously

    Loving someone doesn't stop you from being greedy as you've already proved to us

    I suggest you stop it because if you continue one day your boyfriend will find out and you will lose him. If you don't want that, force yourself to forget about your bit on the side.
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    (Original post by Serine Soul)
    How do people have such complicated love lives when I can't even get a guy to look at me?
    I feel your pain
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    (Original post by markova21)
    Yes . He was 34 and married. I was 22 and not. I wasn't the one who cheated. How could I have cheated when I wasn't in a relationship with someone else? Ditto my boyfriend and his ex. I would never,ever cheat on any partner of mine. What someone I am with does is his business. I'm not responsible for someone else's actions.
    I'm sorry if I came off rude.

    I just think you may not know realise what the girl did is a mistake but but she needs to own up for her actions.
 
 
 
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