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Girlfirend wants me to work out and get abs?

    #3

    (Original post by squish562)
    I would say go for it. Whatever makes her happy
    (Original post by Applepiex3)
    Do it do it do it It will make you happy and your girlfriend happy! Also, you will feel more healthy. As long as you dont feel pressurized! Working out gets fun after a while esp with music
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Do it. It's a great way to show that you care
    (Original post by Marzy-Sama)
    Go For It
    Im guessing you would all do it if your partner suggested that you should lose weight?
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    It's really not a whole lot of work, to be honest. It's completely overhyped the amount of effort you need to put in.
    Go for it and see if you enjoy it but don't do it for anyone else.
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    I say go for it but tell her that you like to see a nice athletic toned body on women too
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    Tell her to **** off. It's different if you put on a lot of weight and she got concerned about your health, so she told you to workout, but that's not the case. I mean if you want, great, do it for yourself. You shouldn't feel pressured to look a certain way for your gf. If my bf told me to lose weight (despite the fact I'm healthy and light anyway), I'd tell him to **** off.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Im guessing you would all do it if your partner suggested that you should lose weight?
    Yes, I would if my partner told me.

    Apart from being respectful to one another, if one suggests to their partner how to improve themselves then it means that they both are very open to one another.

    You want a partner who is able to tell you what to improve about yourself and for you to do the same towards your partner. Rather than have a suffering relationship where both of you can't express how you truly feel about one another.
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    If you know how to **** a girl right this never comes up (speaking as someone incapable of becoming a beefcake)

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    should I do it?
    Do whatever you think is healthy, and compromise insofar as you think it is reasonable to do so, for your partner. Simples
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Im guessing you would all do it if your partner suggested that you should lose weight?
    I would do it if I wanted to, not because my boyfriend told me to
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    Completely agree with akemikat


    Firstly, why does she think you want to sit and listen to her talk about who she thinks have good bodies? Her sitting there and appreciating the abs on those guys is one thing, turning to her boyfriend and saying "hey look how amazing their bodies are" is another. I'm not saying she's trying to make you feel jealous or upset, that would definitely not be okay, but it's a pretty insensitive thing to do. If you started talking about female bodies on the tv she'd likely snap at you and feel hurt over it. Out of interest, do you feel hurt over it? Sorry if you've already answered this and I haven't seen. If it bothers you that she does this, you should definitely mention it.

    The thing is, it's the fact she's trying to use some kind of model to set the standard. It's one thing to suggest to your partner that they could maybe lose some weight, but to compare to other people and set a standard that, frankly, isn't always easily attainable is not fair. Not to mention that actors will likely beef up for their roles and it's included in their job roles and how they make a living. A lot of people don't have that kind of motivation or time in order to reach that level of fitness. It might not always be attained in the healthiest of ways either.

    The only time that change is ever really successful is if it's something that YOU want. Are you happy with your body? If so, don't let what anyone else says sway you.

    In my opinion, most people would be outraged at men who sit and comment on women on the tv and make their girlfriend's feel like they need to work out. I'm feeling the same kind of outrage at what you've said, but most people seem to think it's fine to say "yeah beef up because your girlfriend wants it". We all change in little ways in the hopes of piquing the interest of our partners but committing to a lifestyle change is a bit bigger than that.

    Ultimately you should do whatever you want to and if that isn't going to the gym, then I would say if your girlfriend loves you so much, she'll just accept it. Being healthy and fit is very important, and nobody should discourage exercise or healthy habits...but unless you're actually unhealthy in some way, nobody needs to be trying to make you do stuff you don't want to do.
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    Celebrity bodies are not real. All of them are heavily photoshopped with special lighting (even in motion pictures), and in fact some of them got their abs drawn physically and/or digitally.

    People in real life who are very masculine have to go through a very strict diet with a heavy makeup schedule. Naturally, many could only keep that up for a short period of time - the rest take drugs to enhance the effects.

    It's anything but healthy.
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    She's with you, ain't she? If she wanted some muscular guy she'd be with a muscular guy, I would have thought.

    Go to the gym if YOU want to.
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    Liar, liar, pants are on fire.
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    If you know how to **** a girl right this never comes up (speaking as someone incapable of becoming a beefcake)

    Do whatever you think is healthy, and compromise insofar as you think it is reasonable to do so, for your partner. Simples
    Good point. If it's not simply a shallow comment then perhaps her deeper meaning is that she wants OP to be more dominant (since that's associated with physicality).
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    (Original post by Rakas21)
    perhaps her deeper meaning is that she wants OP to be more dominant (since that's associated with physicality)
    Indubitably. Female attraction is primarily a function of how a guy makes a girl feel (security value, a partial function of aesthetics), whereas male attraction is premised more directly/heavily on aesthetics (replication value). Related thread
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    (Original post by Greg Jackson)
    45 minutes to an hour three times a week is all you need, simple full body beginner's routine plus the appropriate diet will get you to where you want to go, go to the fitness section and read the FAQ's.
    Mike Chang hates him
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    (Original post by AlexFam)
    It's really not a whole lot of work, to be honest. It's completely overhyped the amount of effort you need to put in.
    Go for it and see if you enjoy it but don't do it for anyone else.

    everybody has abs.
    It's just that most people have too much bodyfat so they are not visible.

    if OP was skinny and went to the gym and ate right ...a few months down the line and abs might start to show.

    If OP is normal weight [and doesn't wish to be skinny] then it will take considerably longer to get visible abs as he will have to loose bodyfat and gain muscle before his abs will show ...whereas the skinny guy just has to gain muscle.
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    (Original post by ANM775)
    everybody has abs.
    It's just that most people have too much bodyfat so they are not visible.

    if OP was skinny and went to the gym and ate right ...a few months down the line and abs might start to show.

    If OP is normal weight [and doesn't wish to be skinny] then it will take considerably longer to get visible abs as he will have to loose bodyfat and gain muscle before his abs will show ...whereas the skinny guy just has to gain muscle.
    I've been working out for a few years I think I know all of this.

    Not true. If he ate in a 250-500 calorie/day deficit he would still mostly likely gain muscle and lose 0.5-1lb of fat per week provided he went to the gym. For someone new to the gym, this is easy.
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    (Original post by AlexFam)
    I've been working out for a few years I think I know all of this.

    Not true. If he ate in a 250-500 calorie/day deficit he would still mostly likely gain muscle and lose 0.5-1lb of fat per week provided he went to the gym. For someone new to the gym, this is easy.
    there's a lot of debate surrounding the subject of if it's possible to loose fat and gain muscle at the same time.

    personally speaking, when i was a newbie and bulked to 13 stone, after i had cut to 12 i was actually stronger.

    so maybe there is some truth in it. what I do know though is that cutting and building muscle is not the optimal way to build muscle
    #4

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically, me and my girlfriend have been going out for nearly a year and we started living together. I'm not a fat guy by any means- I'm of average build but I'm not that muscular. My girlfriend isn't muscular either but she is lean and has a good body (not biased)

    The thing is that when we watch movies and tv and there is some Channing Tatum/Brad Pitt/Ryan Gosling kind of guy with a great body and abs, she always points it out and says what a great body they have. She's never told me to work out and get ripped but it's kinda clear that she would probably prefer me to be more built in terms of my upper body.

    My question is: should I do it? Do girls actually find it a big turn on? Or is it just a small difference in terms of attraction? I am a tally considering going to the gym and putting some effort in to look better and get visible abs but it's a lot of work so I wanna know whether it's actually worth it? We're pretty serious now in terms of the relationship.
    Hello mate, here's the deal, it makes no difference. none. I am a competitive weightlifter with a great body but I suffer because I'm short and ugly. Trust me, your face, heights and personality matter so much more. Keep being you, don't be what you don't want to be.
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    (Original post by ANM775)
    there's a lot of debate surrounding the subject of if it's possible to loose fat and gain muscle at the same time.

    personally speaking, when i was a newbie and bulked to 13 stone, after i had cut to 12 i was actually stronger.

    so maybe there is some truth in it. what I do know though is that cutting and building muscle is not the optimal way to build muscle
    It's actually not hotly debated. If you maintain a positive nitrogen balance while cutting, you will gain muscle.
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    (Original post by ANM775)
    everybody has abs.
    It's just that most people have too much bodyfat so they are not visible.

    if OP was skinny and went to the gym and ate right ...a few months down the line and abs might start to show.

    If OP is normal weight [and doesn't wish to be skinny] then it will take considerably longer to get visible abs as he will have to loose bodyfat and gain muscle before his abs will show ...whereas the skinny guy just has to gain muscle.
    I have never been skinny, but with starting gym and altering my diet I attained visible abs in six weeks.*
 
 
 
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