Relationship with teacher. Watch

mitsabeeba
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#41
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#41
(Original post by hannah_dru)
Why is it sick?
because its unhelpful.
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hannah_dru
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#42
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#42
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
because its unhelpful.
unhelpful for what?
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Anonymous #1
#43
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#43
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
why?
would it actually discourage you from the situation?

No, I just want to understand other people's views on this.

In response to Segat1, my parents are fine with it - they take the view that I'm an adult, and that he seems a nice guy.
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Segat1
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#44
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#44
Well then, it sounds to me like your friends are getting a bit het up over it. They'll come round.
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Charlski
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#45
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#45
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
because its unhelpful.

What's unhelpful? I don't think your comment was very helpful, actually.
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Cate15
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#46
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#46
dont let them effect your relationship
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Tootles
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#47
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#47
You're both adults, you finished before it started, so there shouldn't be any problem. Just be careful, though.
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mitsabeeba
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#48
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#48
(Original post by Charlski)
What's unhelpful? I don't think your comment was very helpful, actually.

why, because i offered an opinion instead of a fake nicey-nice, step-by-step guide to "make your relationship work and shut your friends up" ?
please.
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hannah_dru
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#49
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#49
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
why, because i offered an opinion instead of a fake nicey-nice, step-by-step guide to "make your relationship work and shut your friends up" ?
please.
You're not making any sense. All you said was "It's sick" and then "cos it's unhelpful." What does that mean? In no way justified.
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mitsabeeba
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#50
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#50
(Original post by hannah_dru)
You're not making any sense. All you said was "It's sick" and then "cos it's unhelpful." What does that mean? In no way justified.
are you the op?
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hannah_dru
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#51
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#51
No. If I was it'd say "thread starter" underneath my name.
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Anonymous #1
#52
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#52
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
are you the op?

No, she isn't. And frankly, your opinion wasn't very helpful. A helpful one would tell me WHY you think it's sick.
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Charlski
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#53
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#53
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
why, because i offered an opinion instead of a fake nicey-nice, step-by-step guide to "make your relationship work and shut your friends up" ?
please.

Actually, some of us see nothing wrong in someone having a relationship with their ex-teacher. We're not 'fakey nicey-nice' at all.

Anyway, the OP didn't ask to be told that her relationship was wrong, she asked for advice on how to sort the situation which has arisen between her and her friends out. I imagine she is perfectly capable of deciding whether it's 'sick' or not.
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Meep!
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#54
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#54
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
why, because i offered an opinion instead of a fake nicey-nice, step-by-step guide to "make your relationship work and shut your friends up" ?
please.

And just what about everyone elses posts do you think is 'fake nicey-nice'? Just why is this relationship sick?

Having an opinion is fine, but it's not very helpful when you don't bother justifying your opinion.
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Charlski
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#55
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#55
(Original post by mitsabeeba)
why, because i offered an opinion instead of a fake nicey-nice, step-by-step guide to "make your relationship work and shut your friends up" ?
please.
So, are you going to bother offering an explanation?
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Charlski
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#56
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#56
Well, mitsabeeba, instead of negging, why don't you offer an explanation? Surely isn't that hard?
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hannah_dru
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#57
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#57
She negged you? This thread is getting silly now.
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Charlski
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#58
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#58
(Original post by hannah_dru)
She negged you? This thread is getting silly now.

Yeah, it is.

OP, you're just going to have to tell your friends that you're happy, and just to let you live your life the way you want to. If you're happy, that's what matters.
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RangerX
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#59
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#59
I think it's is wrong for your teacher a 36yrs old man to be having a sexual relationship with a 18yrs old girl. you as you are still quite very and much younger can be vulnerable or easily manipulated by elderly and as a teacher I think this sounds worse cos you might not be the only student he had had sexual relationship with. I hope you're not doing something you would regret in future. What happens if you get pregnant? I'm really concerned and I understand why people would think this is sick. If I am your friend I wouldn't want you to be having a sexual relationship with a 36yrs old man and especially as he is a teacher which makes it all unprofessional. You have your future ahead of you and you need to be careful and you shouldn't let anything like this ruin it. I really think you should stop and think of what you re doing and getting yourself involved in. Imagine you re a parent and you have a daughter aged 18 in this situation... It can be quite disturbing but maybe that is just the way I feel about it
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Anonymous #1
#60
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#60
(Original post by RangerX)
I think it's is wrong for your teacher a 36yrs old man to be having a sexual relationship with a 18yrs old girl. you as you are still quite very and much younger can be vulnerable or easily manipulated by elderly and as a teacher I think this sounds worse cos you might not be the only student he had had sexual relationship with.
Thanks for posting this. It's nice to have the view of someone who doesn't really agree with it.

So far as I know (because I've asked, and I believe his answer), he's never been in a relationship with a student before. I really don't think he's the standard 'Ooh, vulnerable young girl - I must take advantage' type, as otherwise, I'm sure he wouldn't have bothered waiting until I finished school. He had plenty of chances to 'get involved' earlier on, but didn't take them.


I hope you're not doing something you would regret in future. What happens if you get pregnant?
What would happen if I got pregnant in any relationship? I'm afraid I don't even think about this, because I could get pregnant by having sex with anyone. Anyway, I'm on the pill, and always very careful about taking it at the right time. It's never yet failed me.

I'm really concerned and I understand why people would think this is sick. If I am your friend I wouldn't want you to be having a sexual relationship with a 36yrs old man and especially as he is a teacher which makes it all unprofessional.
I don't really know about the unprofessional bit - I'm no longer his pupil, so it's not going against any code of conduct.

You have your future ahead of you and you need to be careful and you shouldn't let anything like this ruin it. I really think you should stop and think of what you re doing and getting yourself involved in.
Yes, I understand the risks involved in this, and how sometimes these relationships do just end up with the girl being manipulated into doing stupid things, like staying with an abusive/untruthful older bf, but again, this could happen in any relationship. I'm not naive, and I'll be out of it in a flash if things start looking like they've gone that way.

Imagine you re a parent and you have a daughter aged 18 in this situation...
This could be partly where my failure to understand my friends' problems with it lie. If I had a daughter of my age, and she had a 36 year old bf, I would be fine with it if he seemed genuine and nice, and she seemed happy. My parents know full well about the relationship, and are ok with it.
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