GF doesnt wants sex, been together 2 years now Watch

steelmole
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#41
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#41
(Original post by Local_United_Fan)
:rolleyes: "I really want sex but am prepared to wait another a year"

"I don't want to be with anyone else, ever"

You're a b.itch, mate, plain and simple. You don't DESERVE to be using that thing between your legs, and you're gonna end up very hurt looking very stupid at some point in the future. Hopefully this virtual slap-in-the-face will make you see the error of your ways and get you off your arse to do something about the problem.

Don't believe me? Carry on the way you are doing and see.
I see the misogynists are in. There is a kernel of truth in it, but you can't say for certain. I would explain to her how you feel. See what she says and then decide whether to stay or go.
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storminaDcup
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#42
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ok, i really admire you for waiting for 2 years. it's a long time, and i know, i've been there. my bf is a christian and we've been together a year and a half without sex. and i am a virgin aswell. i recognise how you want to experience it and sort of "move" the relationship forward. i think what you really have to do is talk to her, explain how you're feeling and get to the root of what shes really feeling. why doesnt she feel ready? has she had bad experiences with sex in the past? it just strikes me as a bit strange that you havent even done "other" stuff....she might have like a psychological problem, or even healtth problem, llack of sex drive etc...i dont know, if you're in love, there needs to be some kind of physical intimacy because tbh you're only good as best friends in my opinion. if there's no "desire" to be intimate with your other half that would raise alarm bells in my head about what kind of "love" this is.
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billyboymccoy
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#43
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(Original post by MiDGE '08)
haha, what do you think she's using him for if they're not having sex!?!?
Companion ship and romance. and other lame stuff.
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LaurenFah
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#44
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#44
I'm not saying push her into anything, but maybe try and discuss why it is she feels she isn't ready - is she just fearful of it, or is it because she values her virginity?

Either way; sex is an important part of the relationship for some, 2 years is a long time...
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Sanity Panda
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#45
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(Original post by Anonymous)
If you want to be with her for the rest of your life....why don't you consider proposing to her? I know I would feel a lot more assured if I could have lost my virginity to someone who promised never to betray the act that requires a lot of trust.

I know it sounds a little extreme, but it's just a suggestion.
That's like the worst thing you could do to yourself.

As important as sex may be to somebody. It shouldn't be about being with someone forever, instead being with someone you trust. Marriage itself shouldn't add any element of truth to the relationship in reality... it should be there already.
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Sanity Panda
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#46
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#46
(Original post by billyboymccoy)
Companion ship and romance. and other lame stuff.
Erm. That's what makes up the majority of a relationship?

Or... Sex is the the relationship xD
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mr-breaker
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#47
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I've got two questions:

1) On the day that you first met your girlfriend, if you could see into the future and it said in two years time you would still be a virgin, without an idea when you would have sex with her, would you still have made her your woman?

2) When you got with your girlfriend, if a woman came along 6 months along the line that was almost EXACTLY like your girlfriend (personality, looks, etc), but was willing to have sex with you within a week, who would you choose?

Actually, I've thought of a third.........

3) Why haven't you found out what it will take to make your girlfriend comfortable enough with you to take your relationship sexual? And if you have, why haven't you done it??????????
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Sanity Panda
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#48
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(Original post by mr-breaker)

2) When you got with your girlfriend, if a woman came along 6 months along the line that was almost EXACTLY like your girlfriend (personality, looks, etc), but was willing to have sex with you within a week, who would you choose?
Would you? :p:
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JuLz_FeRn
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(Original post by Sanity Panda)
Would you? :p:
haha aye it seems a pointless question.

1) you're never going to meet someone like that
2) it's just pointless lol! Even if that's the case, it doesn't sort out his situation now.
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amber2008
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#50
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I feel so sorry for you! I really coulden't wait for 2 years! I would be gagging for it! x
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mr-breaker
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#51
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(Original post by Sanity Panda)
Would you? :p:
In THAT hypothetical situation, especially at his age, it's a turbo-ship, fist-pump insta-call (In English, I let my girlfriend down gently, and get with the New Workout Plan :p: )

(Original post by JuLz_FeRn)
haha aye it seems a pointless question.

1) you're never going to meet someone like that
2) it's just pointless lol! Even if that's the case, it doesn't sort out his situation now.
I'm just getting the OP to think creatively here..........there is ALWAYS a better option, and if he continues to think in a static fashion, rather than dynamically and creatively, he's gonna continue to struggle.

In this case, it's clear the OP went for the relationship back then without deciding beforehand what he wanted from the relationship (i.e he may have wanted sex from her, but he never considered how he would react to not getting sex after 1 month, 3 months, 6 months, 1 year etc etc)

The fact that he is a virgin gave him the PERFECT excuse not to confront his fear, and help his girlfriend confront her fears of sexual intimacy.......which is why we're all here today!!!!
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The_Bear
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#52
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She hasn't even sucked you off and you want to smash her in the babymaker?

It's not a home run if you leg it to 4th base first. Jesus. When you're next naked cuddling suggest a 69.
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Sanity Panda
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#53
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(Original post by mr-breaker)
In THAT hypothetical situation, especially at his age, it's a turbo-ship, fist-pump insta-call (In English, I let my girlfriend down gently, and get with the New Workout Plan :p: )
:p: But onto more serious thought discussion.

It's not exactly the same situation but it establishes my point fairly okay. Your best friend. If someone came along as an "improved" version. What would you do?
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Cassie89
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#54
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Go down on her!
The only way she's ever going to want sex is if she's turned on..and anyone would be frightened at the prospect of sex without having done anything before. Start with boob touching etc
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qwertyytrewqm
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#55
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lol boob touching has been done! ive touched her all over but if i head down there she pulls me away. she says to me "im so horny" and then im like so lets do it and shes like no.
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tropicalcoconuts3
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#56
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(Original post by qwertyytrewqm)
lol boob touching has been done! ive touched her all over but if i head down there she pulls me away. she says to me "im so horny" and then im like so lets do it and shes like no.
Ahh thats like leading you on!! I don't get why she doesn't want to do anything about the horniness! Seriously.
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qwertyytrewqm
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#57
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#57
(Original post by mr-breaker)
I've got two questions:

1) On the day that you first met your girlfriend, if you could see into the future and it said in two years time you would still be a virgin, without an idea when you would have sex with her, would you still have made her your woman?

2) When you got with your girlfriend, if a woman came along 6 months along the line that was almost EXACTLY like your girlfriend (personality, looks, etc), but was willing to have sex with you within a week, who would you choose?

Actually, I've thought of a third.........

3) Why haven't you found out what it will take to make your girlfriend comfortable enough with you to take your relationship sexual? And if you have, why haven't you done it??????????
1) Maybe not. But thats just a stupid question no one sees into the future. But if she had said to me i dont want sex before marriage then maybe we would not have got together.

2) I would stay with my girl. I love her so much.

3) Believe me ive tried. she doesnt like to answer these questions so I dont, like, keep begging for sex all the time. When I have tried she just doesnt answer or says we do it soon.
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mr-breaker
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#58
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(Original post by Sanity Panda)
:p: But onto more serious thought discussion.

It's not exactly the same situation but it establishes my point fairly okay. Your best friend. If someone came along as an "improved" version. What would you do?
That's not a zero-sum situation, they can both co-exist.

In fact in my example they can co-exist, if you're that much of a pimp/mack/playa:ninja: , or are just plain sneaky!
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Desperate Prayer
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(Original post by tropicalcoconuts3)
I don't get the big deal with being 'ready' I understand everyone is different, but what do these girls expect to suddenly happen for them to feel ready? Do they think one day they'll wake up and be like hmm I'm gonna have sex today. I lost my virginity at 17 and was only with my bf for like a month, and didn't feel any different about myself after. I think some girls make it such a big deal that losing your virginity is seen as something so 'special' whereas really it's nothing that special! I mean it's important you feel comfortable with the person you're about to lose it to and that, but you too have been together 2 years! How much more comfortable can you be! I'm a girl myself and reading this I feel so sorry for you, I even feel like she's giving you false hope 'I'm not ready yet' have you asked her why she doesn't feel ready? Don't do it in a pressurised sort of way, just ask her what will make her feel ready. I personally reckon she's just scared, but I don't get why someone who has done modelling can't share her body with someone shes supposed to love. 2 years is such a long time to wait, it must make you wonder whether she really loves you, and personally I think she's being a bit unfair on you.
Lots of virgins or whatever will dissagree with me for this post but I'm entitled to my opinion...
I agree with most of what you are saying - and yes, two years is a long time to wait. The that hurts the most I think, is that you (we, and most of the people here) are at the physical and sexual peak of our lives - its hard to let that slip by, no matter how much you love someone. Ill save my years of celibacy for when im a huge, kindly santa-esque old man who has dedicated the rest of his life to humanitarian causes, thanks
I think that, as long as you care about the person you are with, sex is a completely natural act and should not be shied away from. One could come to the conclusion that she doesnt like you enough to take that final step, that she is scared, self conscious or just "not ready" although how ready do you have to be? I can understand some trepidation...but two years in a loving relationship? Like the poster I quoted - you dont wake up *ready* to lose your virginity. The nearest you can come to being ready for such a natural act is aroused to the point where your inhibitions fall away, preferrably with someone who you connect with and know you will enjoy the experience with. Im sure a lot of people find themselves ready, get scared or decide that the time isnt right, and so...dont.

Honestly, op - im not sure if I should praise you for being a better man than me, or chastise you for being foolish. Really wanting to take it further in what appears to be a loving, stable relationship but also stating "You will wait another year"?

Make your choice - If you dont, you could come to regret it.
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mr-breaker
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#60
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(Original post by qwertyytrewqm)
2) I would stay with my girl. I love her so much.
What is it about her that you love so much you were (are) willing to masturbate your teenage/young adult years away?

Maybe it's because I haven't been in a relationship where I've had to wait long for sex, so please help me out here!

3) Believe me ive tried. she doesnt like to answer these questions so I dont, like, keep begging for sex all the time. When I have tried she just doesnt answer or says we do it soon.
You do realise she's slowrolling you here? I was gonna say something here, but something better's just been posted:

(Original post by Desperate Prayer)
One could come to the conclusion that she doesnt like you enough to take that final step
If you were everything she wanted, she would have already had sex with you...............discuss.
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