Depression Society MkII Watch

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hbandtr4eva
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#6901
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#6901
I'm here tufts. Talk to me.
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fairy spangles
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#6902
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#6902
(Original post by becki08)
:hugs: for everyone
hey becki and jonathon hows things??
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Not Invented Yet
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#6903
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#6903
Hello all. Hope things are well.

I was meant to see my OT yesterday, but after mum had driven me all the way there through the snow it turned out the place was closed. I was quite glad of that to be honest, because my last session was a nightmare so I was really dreading going back. Last time she asked me whether I actually wanted to be there in occupational therapy or whether I was only going because I felt forced to. I hadn't really thought of that before - I didn't think I had a choice - and when I considered it I realised I really didn't want to be there because I don't care about getting better. In fact the idea of it terrifies me because then I'd have to actually take responsibility for things - how pathetic is that? I'm hiding behind mental illness, it's ridiculous. So all this was going through my head and it made a lump come to my throat. If I had opened my mouth to speak I would have started crying and I don't think I would have been able to stop, so I didn't dare open my mouth. So she kept asking me all these questions and I just kept nodding or shrugging because I couldn't speak and she got quite frustrated and basically said there was no point in her wasting her time on me if I wasn't prepared to work for it, so yesterday was going to be our last session. She's referring me to a CBT person. I don't know why she thinks that will be any better than the OT was, I'm still a pathetic useless lump who will just sit there and not put any effort it and run away from any progress. And there's no-one on earth I can talk to about what's really going on in my head because I just can't get words out when I approach the subject... somewhere between my brain and my mouth something just stops working.

So anyway, that was longer than I intended it to be. I'm down at the moment because I've been binging all day (sooo much pizza... and chocolate cake... ugh) so I feel obese and disgusting. Which of course I am. Can't even attempt to deny that - BMI 33, I am OBESE. Yuck. Fat pig. Fat fat fat pig.
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Tufts
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#6904
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#6904
im in a bad situation
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#6905
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#6905
(Original post by Tufts)
im in a bad situation
What's up?
xxx
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hbandtr4eva
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#6906
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#6906
(Original post by Tufts)
im in a bad situation
Tell us about it. We're here to look after you :hugs:
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jonathan122
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#6907
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#6907
Please talk to us Tufts. :console:
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fairy spangles
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#6908
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#6908
(Original post by Tufts)
im in a bad situation
whats happened?
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Tufts
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#6909
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#6909
no one can look after me. i dont know if i have a home
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jonathan122
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#6910
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#6910
(Original post by Tufts)
no one can look after me. i dont know if i have a home
What's happened? Where are you now?
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hbandtr4eva
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#6911
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#6911
(Original post by Tufts)
no one can look after me. i dont know if i have a home
Where are you Tufts? We'll look after you. What do you want us to do? Can we help? :hugs: Just talk to us, we're here.
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Tufts
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#6912
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#6912
(Original post by jonathan122)
What's happened? Where are you now?
im in the bedroom. hes in the livingroom. looks like hes sleeping there. all the lights are off
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hbandtr4eva
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#6913
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#6913
(Original post by Tufts)
im in the bedroom. hes in the livingroom. looks like hes sleeping there. all the lights are off
Did you have an argument? What happened? :hugs:
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Tufts
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#6914
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#6914
(Original post by hbandtr4eva)
Did you have an argument? What happened? :hugs:
serious bad ****. i should be old enough to sort this **** out myself. but i dont know how
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jonathan122
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#6915
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#6915
(Original post by Tufts)
im in the bedroom. hes in the livingroom. looks like hes sleeping there. all the lights are off
I've PMed you. :hugs:
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fairy spangles
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#6916
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#6916
(Original post by Tufts)
serious bad ****. i should be old enough to sort this **** out myself. but i dont know how

surely theres a way to? theres a way out everything. make sure your safe dont drink anymore - makes things worse.
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Blue Rose
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#6917
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#6917
(Original post by daveywavey)
Was it the first time you went to see them? If you keep going, you might feel like your getting somewhere with the councilling sessions eventually
Yeah, it was the first time, Im going again next week. I actually enjoyed it. Last time I felt like I was going to burst into tears (even though it was just an assessment)
But asking for a male person rather than a female (who did the assessment) made it much better and easier.
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jonathan122
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#6918
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#6918
I'm going to bed now.

Tufts, please take care of yourself. I hope things are a bit better in the morning. :console:

Hope everyone else is ok. :hugs:
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*pink_sapphires*
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#6919
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#6919
Can't read all the posts because I'm on Dad's laptop but hope everyone is ok. I'm having an ok-ish birthday. Gav sent me a lovely lovely text which made me smile. So tired though. I have a cheesy hat to wear tonight....see my facebook if you have me. Wish I could be happier but c'est la vie. Love and hugs to all. x
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Pocket Calculator
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#6920
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#6920
(Original post by *pink_sapphires*)
Can't read all the posts because I'm on Dad's laptop but hope everyone is ok. I'm having an ok-ish birthday. Gav sent me a lovely lovely text which made me smile. So tired though. I have a cheesy hat to wear tonight....see my facebook if you have me. Wish I could be happier but c'est la vie. Love and hugs to all. x
happy birthday! С Дём Роздения! Enjoy yerself!
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