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My lack of relationships and desire for a relationship. Watch

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    (Original post by BlackWarStudent)
    py0alb you one horny guy brav ,
    Ps I understand brothels are the place to be?
    errrr... what?
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    Who is talking about getting drunk? I'm commenting on your very visible misplaced sense of superiority and ego driven justification of your social self-exclusion.

    Let me see.. so you're not very popular at school, and don't get included in many social functions. This is difficult for your ego to cope with, so instead you turn it on its head and convince yourself that it is actually them that are not good enough for you, and rather than them excluding you from the fun, you are excluding them. I bet this makes your feel empowered doesn't it? Amirite or amirite? :awesome:

    TBH, you sound a bit like one of those nutters who flips out and stalks the school with a machine guy mowing down everyone in your path because they didn't invite him to their party because you're "a bit creepy".
    When I said the OP was like me, I meant with regard to certain aspects. I have not been excluded from social interactions and thus your post is a prime example of a misplaced rant attempting to, unjustifiably, seize the high ground of the situation. It's certainly not a case of 'not being popular in school' because I actually have a comprehensive perspective on life and pity those who you would deem 'popular'.

    It is futile to argue against such people as yourself about getting drunk, 'having fun' and all that that entails. You are examples of the Victorian backlash - a pathetic, adolescent-esque rebellion on the correct ideals (I do not believe the Victorians had everything right, and am far from being one before you oh-so predictably call me such) and believe that the way people live now is correct. A parent-teen relationship is the perfect analogy for this. In the eyes of the teen, the parent is boring, wrong, drains all the fun out of everything, but when they come round to being such themselves, they finally realise they were right.

    I am not disputing the fact that getting drunk, having sex and the like is all very fun; what I am saying is that to do it on a regular basis and as an organised way of 'having fun' is immoral and anti social. A complete neglect of responsibility and, as I said, decency. I'm sure your parents are proud, as will you be when your children go out getting drunk (and everything that follows suit from that state) on a regular basis, embarrassing themselves and you.

    Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll end this debate and do something more worthwhile with my time.
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    (Original post by rylit91)
    When I said the OP was like me, I meant with regard to certain aspects. I have not been excluded from social interactions and thus your post is a prime example of a misplaced rant attempting to, unjustifiably, seize the high ground of the situation. It's certainly not a case of 'not being popular in school' because I actually have a comprehensive perspective on life and pity those who you would deem 'popular'.

    It is futile to argue against such people as yourself about getting drunk, 'having fun' and all that that entails. You are examples of the Victorian backlash - a pathetic, adolescent-esque rebellion on the correct ideals (I do not believe the Victorians had everything right, and am far from being one before you oh-so predictably call me such) and believe that the way people live now is correct. A parent-teen relationship is the perfect analogy for this. In the eyes of the teen, the parent is boring, wrong, drains all the fun out of everything, but when they come round to being such themselves, they finally realise they were right.

    I am not disputing the fact that getting drunk, having sex and the like is all very fun; what I am saying is that to do it on a regular basis and as an organised way of 'having fun' is immoral and anti social. A complete neglect of responsibility and, as I said, decency. I'm sure your parents are proud, as will you be when your children go out getting drunk (and everything that follows suit from that state) on a regular basis, embarrassing themselves and you.

    Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll end this debate and do something more worthwhile with my time.

    You're an odd one, that's for sure.
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    We're not arguing, we're debatin' against each other.

    Have you asked any girls out? Where is the problem exactly?
    Yeah I've asked a few girls out, they've all said no. So basically I'm a guy who hasn't ever had a date but I'm an insatiable romantic and want a caring loving relationship and generally have fun with the girl of my dreams. I know I'm probably a bit young to feel this but I do feel it and I can't help it. I'm also rather serious and find it hard to have light hearted fun with anyone who isn't in my very close circle of friends (ie two people).

    Any advice?
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    (Original post by Bananas01)
    all I want is a meaningful relationship with someone special, is that really too much to ask?
    as you will come to learn; most of the time, yes it is.
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    (Original post by Bananas01)
    Yeah I've asked a few girls out, they've all said no. So basically I'm a guy who hasn't ever had a date but I'm an insatiable romantic and want a caring loving relationship and generally have fun with the girl of my dreams. I know I'm probably a bit young to feel this but I do feel it and I can't help it. I'm also rather serious and find it hard to have light hearted fun with anyone who isn't in my very close circle of friends (ie two people).

    Any advice?
    Why did they say no? Did they say? Did you get a feeling for why not?

    I wouldn't go on and on about how loving and romantic you are, it probably puts them off, because although it may well be somewhat true, it sounds like a corny line. Even if you don't want sex straight away (which is a perfectly acceptable position at your age) don't tell them that at first, they'll probably think you're secretly gay.

    TBH, most girls do want a guy that is nice and occasionally romantic etc, but you can easily go overboard with this, and then it becomes clingy and demasculated. Try and strike a balance. Girls want men who are good looking, confident to the point of cockiness, smart and funny, and masculine. For example, nothing turns a girl on more than saying you can't meet her that night because you have <insert sport or other manly activity>, but you can meet them tomorrow instead. That instantly shouts "confident, independent man".

    If you just go on about soppy stuff, you come across as a bit of a girl. If they wanted to date girls, they would be lesbians.
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    Why did they say no? Did they say? Did you get a feeling for why not?

    I wouldn't go on and on about how loving and romantic you are, it probably puts them off, because although it may well be somewhat true, it sounds like a corny line. Even if you don't want sex straight away (which is a perfectly acceptable position at your age) don't tell them that at first, they'll probably think you're secretly gay.

    TBH, most girls do want a guy that is nice and occasionally romantic etc, but you can easily go overboard with this, and then it becomes clingy and demasculated. Try and strike a balance. Girls want men who are good looking, confident to the point of cockiness, smart and funny, and masculine. For example, nothing turns a girl on more than saying you can't meet her that night because you have <insert sport or other manly activity>, but you can meet them tomorrow instead. That instantly shouts "confident, independent man".

    If you just go on about soppy stuff, you come across as a bit of a girl. If they wanted to date girls, they would be lesbians.
    Nah, I don't go all romantic on them

    They usually just fob me off ie "let's be friends" and other *******s which they never follow up on. I just don't think they think I'm the right sort of guy for them, because tbh I am clever, I got AAAAA and dux of the school last year, I just don't think they think of me in that way at all. I also used to be a confident superior ******** but I've stopped that now but I dunno they might still have some of those preconceptions of me from when I was a ****.

    Thanks for your advice by the way
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    (Original post by Bananas01)
    Nah, I don't go all romantic on them

    They usually just fob me off ie "let's be friends" and other *******s which they never follow up on. I just don't think they think I'm the right sort of guy for them, because tbh I am clever, I got AAAAA and dux of the school last year, I just don't think they think of me in that way at all. I also used to be a confident superior ******** but I've stopped that now but I dunno they might still have some of those preconceptions of me from when I was a ****.

    Thanks for your advice by the way
    preconceptions are a *****. Fortunately, we have this fantastic insitution called university where you can go and meet a whole load of new people who have no preconceptions about you whatsoever..
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    OP, it's one of the biggest cliches of all time but be yourself. You say you want a girl to have "silly fun" with, well it will be much easier to do that and less awkward with someone who actually "gets" you than with someone who doesn't. You said you can have fun with your closest friends therefore you aren't "too serious", you just have to feel comfortable with who you are with in order to have fun which is how I presume most people feel.

    Ask the girls who are nice to you to do something outside of school. Remember no-one's going to post miserable pictures of themselves on Facebook so it seems like they are having fun 24/7 when they obviously don't.

    Put yourself out there a bit more (if you can) and just wait and see. Don't think too much about your first relationship and what it's going to be like. You may find your perfect girl at the first attempt but also keep in mind that it may only be a short term thing for whatever reason (that doesn't mean you won't get your hugs and cuddles and have fun though). Just enjoy it for however long it lasts.
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    preconceptions are a *****. Fortunately, we have this fantastic insitution called university where you can go and meet a whole load of new people who have no preconceptions about you whatsoever..
    Yeah that's what I'm bargaining on. Hopefully it'll be better next year!
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    just have some fun and come out of our shell, you sound like a nice guy so it'll happen
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    (Original post by bexter:))
    just have some fun and come out of our shell, you sound like a nice guy so it'll happen
    Thank you very much I'll definitely try to, hope it works!
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    (Original post by Bananas01)
    So basically I'm a 17 year old guy in my last year of school who has never been in a relationship, or even gone out on a date with a girl. I know many of you will sat "that's not too bad you have plenty of time" etc and I totally understand and get what you're saying, but it doesn't really change how I feel

    I see nice girls about the place who are really nice to me and stuff but I never seem to get to know them outside of school or anything. I see lots of nice girls on Facebook, having fun in the pictures and generally just having fun, recently people being stupid and having fun in the snow. But I'm not really like that, I've never been invited anywhere with a group of friends and I don't think I'm a terribly "fun" person, I always seem to be perceived as the serious one, and I do realise I can come across that way.

    This seems to stop me getting to know any girls properly, to the point that if I'm sitting next to a girl in class and she's nice to me I start thinking about her in "that" way. I can't help it, I think I must be desperate or something, but I just really want a relationship.

    I know a lot of you will see this as "guy wants some girl action" but it really isn't. I don't want a relationship for anything like that yet, I just want to have a girl who really cares about me, who I can go out and have fun with and have a great time. I'm not really interested in sex and stuff yet, I just want to be able to have someone to be really nice to me and who I can go out, have fun, maybe hold hands and share some hugs with, but it doesn't seem to be happening for me. I'm thinking maybe I should just wait until I start university next year so I can get a fresh start, but I'm applying for Maths which I know is a very male dominated field so I don't know.

    Well so basically I want to be able to join in the silly fun people can have, and get a girlfriend in which to share my life, and to be honest I don't know why I'm making this thread, maybe you guys are in the same position and can share your experiences and give advice?

    Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read that and reply
    Patience.
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    (Original post by py0alb)
    A relationship without sex has a specific term: its called "friendship".
    You are describing different types of relationships.:rolleyes: Spelling has nothing to do with your lack of knowledge regarding human relationships so stop resorting to typical TSR smug-like words like "nonsense" or "fail".
    Have a good day
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    (Original post by SoulfulBoy)
    You are describing you different types of relationships.:rolleyes:
    Spelling? Fail. Reading the whole thread before posting nonsense? Fail.
 
 
 
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