The Student Room Group

Is it polite/unnecessary to ask the bf if I can meet my ex for coffee?

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Reply 60
Poor guy, you seem like an ********.
Reply 61
But who are you to say there will not be old feelings rushing back? since a meaningful relationship is usually a result of a meaningful friendship such as the one a girl might want with her ex... Who's to say what will happen? we are only humans, and sometimes feelings/emotions can lead to actions; specially exciting actions.
Question a slut would ask that wants to go back to her ex-boyfriend.
Reply 63
Original post by PerigeeApogee
Well they tend to be far more forward than other guys because they've been there done that before, and so think they still have some sort of touching/feeling/appealing privileges.


Although thisis true, unless you're in the earlystages you should have no reason to be worried, she's with you (for example) fora reason.
Reply 64
Original post by Picaa
Jealousy is for low-class, loser types. If your bf has any self-respect and confidence, he won't care that you're meeting your EX for coffee. You're not meeting him for a shag... Presumably either your bf trusts you or he doesn't. If he doesn't, you've got bigger problems waiting for you than this meeting with your ex.


It's not about jealousy; it's about respect for your partner. And it's also about emotional maturity.

You're 100% wrong - If the boyfriend has self-respect and confidence he'll DUMP her for. And he should. She's an immature disrespectful child seeking emotional validation and the taboo thrill of hanging out with an ex.
Reply 65
Girls pretend to be naive about ex boyfriends and about the nature of males in general.

Guys will ALWAYS be trying to get back into your pants. Ex boyfriends are hungry wolves, and you're disrespecting your boyfriend by meeting with them.

And girls know this. They know exactly what's happening, and they get a subtle kick out of it but they pretend not to, and get all self-righteous.
Women crave drama in their lives.

Let's see if any of the honest ones will come in and agree with me.

Btw:

(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 66
Original post by PrimateJ
It's not about jealousy; it's about respect for your partner. And it's also about emotional maturity.

You're 100% wrong - If the boyfriend has self-respect and confidence he'll DUMP her for. And he should. She's an immature disrespectful child seeking emotional validation and the taboo thrill of hanging out with an ex.


You're right, but then at the end of the day she's just a human animal and no doubt wants some thrills in life like everyone else. My personal beliefs are anti-monogamous, and I would be able to tolerate it in my gf. Frankly jealousy isn't worth it - nobody is worth the trouble to be jealous over. It's all bad vibes dressed up as a kind of post-Christian moral sense. That's my opinion about it anyway.
(edited 13 years ago)
Yeah definitely inform him that you are doing it, or it might seem like you're going behind his back or trying to hide it lest he find out. But I don't think there is a problem with doing this, I certainly wouldn't object to my boyfriend doing this (if he really had an ex anyway) and I would expect him to be fine with me seeing mine. :smile:


A lot of people seem to see this as a hugely bad thing :lolwut: I knew my ex as an extremely close friend and boyfriend for over 3 years, meeting up for coffee hardly seems like a massive betrayal.
(edited 13 years ago)
Original post by OMGWTFBBQ
It's polite to tell him you're meeting.

No need to ask though.


This :smile:
Reply 69
I never understood how couples seem to go from lovey-dovey to hating each other and not on speaking terms in a snap of the fingers.
I would be perfectly happy to meet my ex for a coffee, he's just one of my friends after all.
I certainly wouldn't ask my current partner if he was OK with it. Would probably tell him about it either before or after though.

As far as I'm concerned, if a person can't handle their partner meeting up with one of their friends for a coffee, ex or not, then something is wrong, or they have a lot of maturing still to do.
Reply 70
So many pseudo-mature idiots on this forum.
Reply 71
Original post by PrimateJ
Girls pretend to be naive about ex boyfriends and about the nature of males in general.

Guys will ALWAYS be trying to get back into your pants. Ex boyfriends are hungry wolves
]



Totally agree with this from personal experience.

My gf has had two requests from ex's to meet. The first time it was for a chat, the second for a talk about how uni was going. She rejected both due to her own reasons, and in the following days, received other requests from both guys for a lot more than a chat. One wanted a full blown relationship again, the other wanted to jump between the covers.
Reply 72
Serial monogamous friendships in this forum.

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