Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Yep, got smacked a fair bit; then again I was a pretty bad child. Even got the wooden spoon on the back of my legs occasionally.
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    My dad never hit me but my mum's hit me a lot.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Yeah, always used to, not across the face though. I've had my hair pulled, and soap shoved in my mouth (soap was for swearing at the age of 11). Didn't stop me though:smug:
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    I used to do gymnastics and I remember if my hands were in the wrong position while doing a handstand or something,my dad would give them a whack with a ruler so I'd put them in the right place. My dad was an ex gymnast himself so I guess he was pretty strict about this kind of stuff.

    And when I was growing up in Delhi,every time I lied or did something bad my grandma and mum would wash my mouth with soap..Good days
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    I was a pretty naughty child to be fair, not horrendous I was just quite loud and a bit of a smartarse (still am to be fair), so if I acted out a bit my parents would hit me, usually on the backs of my legs. Though looking back on it now and hearing stories of what my friends got/get up to it was probably a little unwarranted considering as I grew up I was pretty much terrified of my parents shouting or telling me off; to the point where I would (and still do a bit) feel horrendously nervous about having to ask them things.
    It was never brutal though in any way what so ever, apart from the time my mother threw a hairbrush at me and it hit me in the head, that hurt quite a bit haha. It was mostly just shouting, which was worse. My mum actually told me once that she 'thought about giving me up for adoption'. Which was not nice for nine year old me.
    But I think mostly it stemmed from their own frustration rather than a desire to discipline me. And it certainly didn't work. It just made me scared, confused about what my parents wanted me to do and an onset for my anxiety. So for that reason I would never hit my child, not that I actually want them. But if I did.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    Yeah I used to get slapped but that's it, it made me more disciplined. I don't think I would hit my children, maybe a little smack on the bottom but that's it.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    im indian so yh i got hit so many times
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    sometimes got a slapped arse and learnt absolutely nothing from it, except that the only answer my mom knows to "why?" is "because I said so". To be honest even though I never got slapped massively often and it was never particularly extreme, it has made me lose a lot of respect for my parents that their response to trivial things was an unexplained red bum rather than a conversation or a reflection into their own arrogance.

    If I have children of my own, I'll never slap them or even punish them by sending them to the naughty step, because that doesn't actually teach them anything, not even discipline properly.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by keturah)
    My dad used to hit me but I hit him back with my hairbrush and broke it
    You go girl! :naughty:

    (Original post by Decorpi12)
    But then, what exactly are you teaching the child? "I'm physically bigger, so I get to enforce the rules by hitting you?"
    Pretty much

    My problem with smacking is that there is a humiliating aspect, in addition to the physical pain inflicted
    Yup, also a traumatising aspect. I loved my mother very much, we have a close bond, but it was traumatic for this figure to occasionally beat you for virtually nothing, and to be powerless to stop it. It made me vow to beat her up when I became big enough (I pardoned her instead), and also made me resent my weak father (who I appealed to multiple times to intervene but, whilst he sympathised, didn’t appear to do anything) :rolleyes:

    Spoiler:
    Show
    I only found out as an adult that he had spoken to her about it a number of times and, at one stage, actually threatened to report her to social services if she didn’t stop beating me :erm:

    parents who spanked their child are three times more likely to use other methods of discipline considered abusive (like beatings)
    You’re smart enough to know why correlation is not a particularly potent indicator here (confounding variable: physical/abusive persona)

    I wouldn't be teaching him anything (except to be more sneaky next time)
    Sneakiness is highly correlated with attainment.. and you want your boy to get ahead in life don’t you? :ninja:

    I believe that the best kind of parenting is the kind that respects a child's integrity while at the same time instilling in him/her good values
    Agreed, the problem is, that’s not always efficacious

    It's parenting by modeling
    Potent, for sure, but hardly sufficient when dealing with young children, sorry, you’re giving kids too much intellectual credit

    Children are known to copy whatever their parents do, and hitting would not be setting a good example
    This is one of the strong reasons against, for sure

    if I hit anybody for any reason, I would feel that I've broken a very important personal value
    Which is?

    Alan Kazdin, president of the American Psychological Society in 2008, says that corporal punishment has been proven by research to not work, and that giving it up is not "giving up an effective technique."
    I’d like to see (the basis for) his ‘evidence’. I know from personal experience that sometimes the only thing I responded to was physicality (although I’m not convinced this had to mean a smack)

    The American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Medical Association (and I am sure many British medical associations) say that smacking/spanking does more harm than it does good
    They’re bound to say that though, aren’t they? I’m afraid I have a lot of experience with health research so I never take 2nd hand guidance at face value. To do so is naïve, there is almost always an agenda (usually a broadly ‘ethical’/pro-social one, but still)

    I can bring out countless research papers to highlight the negative developmental effects of corporal punishment on children
    I have also done a fair bit of research into adverse factors in early life development :borat:

    The naughty step might mildly disturb a child, but it does not involve the kind of assault on his/her physical integrity through the infliction of pain.
    Agreed, which is why I favour such measures, over smacking

    You do not earn respect by hitting somebody else
    Smacking is usually about compliance/punishment/frustration, rather than about ‘respect’

    hitting is not a form of "masculinity."
    Who said it was?

    fatherlessness is a very important problem that must be solved
    It can’t be solved without either a paradigm shift change to our social structures (communal parenting) or rolling back the ‘progress’ of feminism

    Are there any attempts to solve this issue?
    None with any traction, as far as I’m aware

    We do not suffer from this at my country
    Guess why that is? :awesome:

    (Original post by restless5oul)
    I was a pretty naughty child to be fair, not horrendous I was just quite loud and a bit of a smartarse ... My mum actually told me once that she 'thought about giving me up for adoption'. Which was not nice for nine year old me
    Snap, although my mum never said such a thing, I wouldn't exactly have held it against her if she had.. I was a little bugger! :mmm:

    (Original post by louieee)
    I'll never slap them or even punish them by sending them to the naughty step, because that doesn't actually teach them anything, not even discipline properly
    Disagree. I ended up knowing what was likely to get me sent 'outside' and my behaviour at home did change over time; remember taking myself to the naughty step once or twice, in anticipation, actually :laugh:
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Pretty much
    But then if your child decides to hit a smaller child, can you blame him? How exactly will you explain yourself? "The only time assault is ok is when your parent is doing it?"

    Yup, also a traumatising aspect. I loved my mother very much, we have a close bond, but it was traumatic for this figure to occasionally beat you for virtually nothing, and to be powerless to stop it. It made me vow to beat her up when I became big enough (I pardoned her instead), and also made me resent my weak father (who I appealed to multiple times to intervene but, whilst he sympathised, didn’t appear to do anything) :rolleyes:

    Spoiler:
    Show
    I only found out as an adult that he had spoken to her about it a number of times and, at one stage, actually threatened to report her to social services if she didn’t stop beating me :erm:

    I am sorry you had to go through that. How can someone upset little Foo? :frown: But you do agree that smacking is humiliating, painful, and traumatising (you added this), so why are you justifying it? I agree that it produces immediate compliance, but I also think that there are other, more respectful and more educating, ways to get your point across. So it's not like you cannot parent unless you smack. It's been banned in Sweden since 1979, so it's doable.
    Traumatising, painful, humiliating, has the potential to escalate >> immediate compliance (in the presence of other methods). I just feel that it's unnecessary, and I think that a child's right to feel safe trumps a parent's "right to hit."
    You’re smart enough to know why correlation is not a particularly potent indicator here (confounding variable: physical/abusive persona)
    Yes, but you cannot deny the fact that smacking provides a suitable environment for things to escalate, especially when done in anger or frustration (as is usually the case). Why not just make it clear that such methods are not ok and save many children from potential abuse? I am pretty sure that most abused children were at first just smacked. I think parents should be educated that this method is not acceptable through awareness campaigns (as was done in Sweden). They did a great job there.

    Sneakiness is highly correlated with attainment.. and you want your boy to get ahead in life don’t you? :ninja:
    Haha! I'm so thankful for the edit option :P

    Potent, for sure, but hardly sufficient when dealing with young children, sorry, you’re giving kids too much intellectual credit
    Children are smarter than you think. :P You'd be surprised. (Plus it makes sense "evolutionarily speaking", that's how we learn).

    Which is?
    Do no harm. :P

    I’d like to see (the basis for) his ‘evidence’. I know from personal experience that sometimes the only thing I responded to was physicality (although I’m not convinced this had to mean a smack)
    The methods you listed as physicality do not count as corporal punishment. It's smacking (hitting) that does. I have a feeling that you're not convinced that smacking is necessary, which makes your first statement: smacking, only when necessary, is ok, nullified. But then that's just a feeling. Kazdin is basing his opinion on a report published in 2008 under the title Corporal Punishment in the United States: What Research Tells Us About its Effects on Children (Gershoff).
    They’re bound to say that though, aren’t they? I’m afraid I have a lot of experience with health research so I never take 2nd hand guidance at face value. To do so is naïve, there is almost always an agenda (usually a broadly ‘ethical’/pro-social one, but still)
    I agree to an extent, but I don't think that if one day concerned parents ask me if smacking is ok, I don't think that as a pediatrician or psychiatrist (I have no idea what I'll be) I'd be able to say well it's ok under certain circumstances. Given what I know, the experiences of other people I know, the research, what I'm taught, I just feel the balance tilts too far to the side of "do not spank." It's always better to err to the side of caution. I'd rather parents were educated on how to use other methods.
    I cannot, with a clear conscience, say that spanking is ok because it might not be ok, and the consequences are too grave.
    I have also done a fair bit of research into adverse factors in early life development :borat:
    Jolly good! You've done lots of research! So I guess you already know what I'm talking about.

    Agreed, which is why I favour such measures, over smacking
    Which further solidifies above "feeling." Why do you favour such measures above smacking?
    Smacking is usually about compliance/punishment/frustration, rather than about ‘respect’
    I agree. So I would support a ban

    Who said it was?
    Sorry, I jumped into an assumption too quickly.

    It can’t be solved without either a paradigm shift change to our social structures (communal parenting) or rolling back the ‘progress’ of feminism
    You're very skeptical of the "progress" of feminism. Feminism needs more rational and moderate voices, in my opinion. Sometimes I feel that it went too far in the West, as they did not take into account the consequences that some of their ideas would have on other groups/social issues. They're more focused on "women" than they are on "overall equality."

    None with any traction, as far as I’m aware


    Guess why that is? :awesome:
    Because we're awesome, that's why
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Decorpi12)
    But then if your child decides to hit a smaller child, can you blame him?
    Yes, “only mummy is allowed to smack”

    "The only time assault is ok is when your parent is doing it?"
    Correctamundo!

    I am sorry you had to go through that
    Thanks, but **** happens, plenty of people have it worse than I did (including my mother, when she was younger) :dontknow:

    How can someone upset little Foo? :frown:
    Bless you. Little Foo was not entirely blameless, my dear :devil:

    you do agree that smacking is humiliating, painful, and traumatising (you added this)
    Naturally

    why are you justifying it?
    I’m not justifying it so much as explaining why it may be argued that it could serve a legitimate purpose. I did originally state that it is not my intention to smack anyone

    So it's not like you cannot parent unless you smack
    Agreed

    I think that a child's right to feel safe trumps a parent's "right to hit."
    I get a bit agitated when people start banging on about ‘rights’. It’s the relentless pursuit of personal freedom/’rights’ that has landed us with problems like fatherlessness – everyone wants to be able to behave as they like in our society without any personal consequences. Discipline and order are breaking down as a consequence, and ‘civilisation’ is crumbling from within as a huge new underclass sweeps the nation. The London riots provided just a glimpse of what is to come

    you cannot deny the fact that smacking provides a suitable environment for things to escalate
    Indeed so, in some cases

    Why not just make it clear that such methods are not ok and save many children from potential abuse?
    Nanny state

    I think parents should be educated that this method is not acceptable through awareness campaigns (as was done in Sweden). They did a great job there
    Sure, but there is a fine line between libertarian paternalism and the nanny state, policymakers/legislators must tread carefully – they’ve already created quite a mess as it is..

    Haha! I'm so thankful for the edit option :P
    *smiles and nods as if he follows*

    (Plus it makes sense "evolutionarily speaking", that's how we learn)
    We learn in a variety of ways, evolutionarily speaking, I mean.. how do you think Mowgli learnt?

    Do no harm. :P
    Good luck with that! :borat:

    The methods you listed as physicality do not count as corporal punishment
    I know dear, that’s kind of the point I was making.. you seem to have confused me for someone who is pro-smacking(?)

    I have a feeling that you're not convinced that smacking is necessary, which makes your first statement: smacking, only when necessary, is ok, nullified
    Perhaps you’re not au fait with the nuances of the word ‘OK’:- this does not necessarily mean I condone it/would (want to) do it myself, it means it is (broadly seen as) permissible behaviour

    Corporal Punishment in the United States: What Research Tells Us About its Effects on Children (Gershoff)
    ”A meta-analysis … found a positive effect on average”:mute:

    "do not spank."
    Spanking in the UK means smacking hard and repeatedly, I would not consider that to be ok. Only (consenting) adult females should be spanked, in my humble estimation

    I guess you already know what I'm talking about
    Yup

    Why do you favour such measures above smacking?
    Pretty much the same reasons you have given/we have discussed

    Sorry, I jumped into an assumption too quickly
    That’s ok, and well done for apologising, humility is a great virtue we don’t see often enough on this forum! You know what they say about assumption though..

    You're very skeptical of the "progress" of feminism
    You don’t say :top2:

    Sometimes I feel that it went too far in the West, as they did not take into account the consequences that some of their ideas would have on other groups/social issues. They're more focused on "women" than they are on "overall equality."
    Bingo!

    Because we're awesome, that's why
    Something like that.. you’re more patriarchal; men have yet to be emasculated and rendered superfluous to families/society :rolleyes:
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Foo, if you don't feel like/don't have time to read through all of this, just jump to the 11th point. I had a different definition of smacking in mind.
    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Yes, “only mummy is allowed to smack”
    I believe that "when not in self-defense, nobody is allowed to hit" should be an absolute rule. Sorry Mr. Foo, we'll have to disagree here :P

    Correctamundo!


    Thanks, but **** happens, plenty of people have it worse than I did (including my mother, when she was younger) :dontknow:
    I'm still sorry you had to go through this, despite some people having it worse :P

    Bless you. Little Foo was not entirely blameless, my dear :devil:
    I don't think Little Foo's devilish spirit has been beaten out, though :P Foo is a great example that beatings don't work :P


    I’m not justifying it so much as explaining why it may be argued that it could serve a legitimate purpose. I did originally state that it is not my intention to smack anyone
    I understand the enemy's arguments, mon ami.


    I get a bit agitated when people start banging on about ‘rights’. It’s the relentless pursuit of personal freedom/’rights’ that has landed us with problems like fatherlessness – everyone wants to be able to behave as they like in our society without any personal consequences. Discipline and order are breaking down as a consequence, and ‘civilisation’ is crumbling from within as a huge new underclass sweeps the nation. The London riots provided just a glimpse of what is to come
    I agree 100% with you. There are some basic rights that must be respected, though. I don't think I'm arguing for people to behave the way they want without any consequences. Far from it, and it bothers me that my country is heading towards the same path. When I argue against corporal punishment in prisons, for example, I am absolutely not saying that prisoners must not face severe consequences for their actions. I am trying to maintain a moderate position and a balance between the basic rights that every single human being must have and personal responsibility. I always try to keep my positions balanced. I see why you get agitated though, and I too get agitated at such people. Please don't mix me up with them (although they might share some of my opinions).

    Nanny state
    Not so, when it's preventing abuse. Your personal choices must not include hitting. Your children are not your possessions. :P

    Sure, but there is a fine line between libertarian paternalism and the nanny state, policymakers/legislators must tread carefully – they’ve already created quite a mess as it is..
    Same response as above I guess. Hitting should be banned. Nobody says it's a nanny state when they ban hitting the elderly. :P


    I know dear, that’s kind of the point I was making.. you seem to have confused me for someone who is pro-smacking(?)
    No, I know that you will try not to smack and do not intend to use this method.

    Perhaps you’re not au fait with the nuances of the word ‘OK’:- this does not necessarily mean I condone it/would (want to) do it myself, it means it is (broadly seen as) permissible behaviour
    This sentence reminds me of a Lebanese politician :P He's so well-known for speaking exactly like that. (He's one of the smartest and most pragmatic, by the way). Anyway, when I say "It's ok to separate a father from his children in cases of divorce," this means I condone it/would treat it as acceptable, but I will not necessarily do it. You like playing on words :P (you should meet this politician, you guys would enjoy it).


    Spanking in the UK means smacking hard and repeatedly, I would not consider that to be ok. Only (consenting) adult females should be spanked, in my humble estimation
    We're on the same page then. What I'm arguing against is the act of hitting a child repeatedly (not necessarily hard) on the buttocks. (An over the knee thing or something). This is what springs to my mind when I think of smacking and thus, this is what I'm arguing should be banned.
    Spoiler:
    Show
    I know yahooanswers is not the right place to go :P But what I had in mind is something along what those people are talking about
    https://answers.yahoo.com/question/i...3141310AAGXdd3 It's only natural to get outraged, no? I mean, look at the "best answer" :dontknow:



    That’s ok, and well done for apologising, humility is a great virtue we don’t see often enough on this forum! You know what they say about assumption though..
    Thank you, Mr. Foo I have no idea what they say about assumptions :P

    You don’t say :top2:



    Something like that.. you’re more patriarchal; men have yet to be emasculated and rendered superfluous to families/society :rolleyes:
    They're on their way to, unfortunately. Some of the changes they're making are good, but they have to be more careful/mindful. Unfortunately, all they do is just mimic Western feminists, plus they're infiltrated by so many misandrists/radical voices.
    Spoiler:
    Show
    A sociology teacher at my university, maybe 3 years ago, decided to stare at a guy's penis just out of the blue. She told him she's staring at his penis so that men can feel what women go through when they're stared at. In front of the whole class...so you get the picture
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Decorpi12)
    Foo, if you don't feel like/don't have time to read through all of this, just jump to the 11th point. I had a different definition of smacking in mind.
    That’s very thoughtful of you but I shall soldier through, even if I am somewhat delirious! (so what’s new?) :dunce:

    I'm still sorry you had to go through this, despite some people having it worse
    Thanks, you’re sweet – must bear in mind this was like 20+ years ago mind! I’m over it, although I do occasionally guilt my poor mother (never in an accusatory way, always in a matter of fact way)! :devil:

    I don't think Little Foo's devilish spirit has been beaten out, though. Foo is a great example that beatings don't work
    Hey! :sad:

    When I argue against corporal punishment in prisons, for example, I am absolutely not saying that prisoners must not face severe consequences for their actions
    The reality is, sometimes juvenile/criminal delinquents may only respond to ‘the stick’. Just look at our soft prison system, and recidivism here, it’s scandalous That said, I don’t believe striking anyone is the answer, and agree that people have a right not to receive corporal punishment

    Not so, when it's preventing abuse
    I don’t see a smack on the ass as abuse, and nor do the vast majority of people the world over

    Your children are not your possessions
    Your children are your stock, and you have a duty to raise them well, and every right to ensure that they behave. Education is perhaps key, plus intervention in cases of actual abuse. Some e.g. mothers get it into their heads that in order to be ‘heard’ they have to shout/scream/lash out, this needs to be challenged, and it helps if the father figure (or other masculine figures) can help the mother instil some respect in the child (unfortunately women tend to have high pitched voices/relatively submissive personas so it’s rare that e.g. boisterous boys take them all that seriously, relatively speaking)

    Nobody says it's a nanny state when they ban hitting the elderly
    The elderly are both adult, and subject to dementia/deafness/blindness e.g. they cannot always remember who they are/where they are, or fathom what’s going on. It would be neither ethical nor efficacious to strike them, in my view. Mind you, I’ve watched my father care for his deteriorating mother over the course of almost a decade, and I have to say, the guy deserves a medal for his stoicism!

    This sentence reminds me of a Lebanese politician :P He's so well-known for speaking exactly like that. (He's one of the smartest and most pragmatic, by the way)
    Are you suggesting I’m a slippery smartarse, well suited to the political class? :hmmm:

    "It's ok to separate a father from his children in cases of divorce," this means I condone it/would treat it as acceptable, but I will not necessarily do it
    What do you mean by “separate”? Obviously he cannot expect necessarily to be able to live in the same house, but access is important, and is, I believe, tantamount to a ‘right’

    I have no idea what they say about assumptions
    ’Assumption is the mother of all **** ups’ :gah:

    Unfortunately, all they do is just mimic Western feminists, plus they're infiltrated by so many misandrists/radical voices
    Who’s this? The political elites?

    A sociology teacher at my university, maybe 3 years ago, decided to stare at a guy's penis just out of the blue. She told him she's staring at his penis so that men can feel what women go through when they're stared at. In front of the whole class...so you get the picture
    Was she hot tho? :sexface:

    Spoiler:
    Show
    Such a curse being sexually desirable/able to date & mate on account of men being hardwired to ‘notice’ and ‘approach’ :nopity:

    Spoiler:
    Show


    Spoiler:
    Show
    Facetiousness aside, it sucks that some guys don’t seem to mind making other people uncomfortable, I try never to do this personally
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    That’s very thoughtful of you but I shall soldier through, even if I am somewhat delirious! (so what’s new?) :dunce:
    Thank you!! I hope you feel better soon I'm sleep deprived so also somewhat delirious/overwhelmed (although maybe in a different way than you are.


    I don’t see a smack on the ass as abuse, and nor do the vast majority of people the world over
    Neither do I. Hence the term prevent. Again, I didn't have in mind a single smack. As I said above, what I am arguing should be banned is repetitive slaps on the butt done in a systematic way. (Like the people on the link I put before, surely you don't think the way they described the process should be legal?). I wouldn't comment much on a single smack, that would be too over the top
    Spoiler:
    Show
    Besides, there's this nice statement I read written by a wise old man, named Mr. Foo perhaps," people have the right not to receive corporal punishment" and this should be ensured by law


    Your children are your stock, and you have a duty to raise them well, and every right to ensure that they behave. Education is perhaps key, plus intervention in cases of actual abuse. Some e.g. mothers get it into their heads that in order to be ‘heard’ they have to shout/scream/lash out, this needs to be challenged, and it helps if the father figure (or other masculine figures) can help the mother instil some respect in the child (unfortunately women tend to have high pitched voices/relatively submissive personas so it’s rare that e.g. boisterous boys take them all that seriously, relatively speaking)
    Huge generalisation there Mr. Foo. Interestingly, mothers are the ones who make the majority of child abusers (because they spend most time with the child, on average).
    I think that if you attempt a "confrontational" way in child rearing, you won't succeed much. I believe instilling an internal motivation to behave is most ideal. Then again, it is not always practical/attainable.

    The elderly are both adult
    We have to agree to disagree, Foo.
    Spoiler:
    Show
    what have you got against young people you old grandpa?


    Are you suggesting I’m a slippery smartarse, well suited to the political class? :hmmm:
    In a more diplomatic way...yessss

    What do you mean by “separate”? Obviously he cannot expect necessarily to be able to live in the same house, but access is important, and is, I believe, tantamount to a ‘right’
    Of course! Fathers also have a right to fair court proceedings in case they are the primary caretakers. Access is important, and so is involvement in child care.

    ’Assumption is the mother of all **** ups’ :gah:
    Haha! Will keep this in mind

    Who’s this? The political elites?
    Lebanese feminists

    Was she hot tho?
    I don't know what to tell you...Don't want to disappoint you

    Spoiler:
    Show
    Such a curse being sexually desirable/able to date & mate on account of men being hardwired to ‘notice’ and ‘approach’ :nopity:

    Spoiler:
    Show


    Spoiler:
    Show
    Facetiousness aside, it sucks that some guys don’t seem to mind making other people uncomfortable, I try never to do this personally
    Very true. I can't understand those guys. They have issues.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    My brother used to hit me more than my parents ever did. My parents were more in favour of grounding us.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    To the utter disgrace of our politicians, we still allow parents to hit children, and yet everyone calls for an end to bullying. No I would not hit children and I certainly was not hit by my parents.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    I was the middle and unloved child of the household, mother favoured the elder brother while the father favoured the younger sister. Used to get it from the mother quite often due to fighting with the brother, there was also teachers at school to contend with some were plain sadist. Joys of growing up in 1980s Singapore. The brother would get it at school and from the grandparents a lot as they tend to punish by caning if you did poorly at school, I never really got it from the grandparents as for the most part I did well academically and knew how to get on their good side.

    Took quite a lot of beatings usually by a light cane on the butt for the younger sister as the elder brother had zero sense of personal responsibility, if he did something wrong, he'd either blame it on me or the younger sister, on occasions that he blamed the younger sister and she was about to get a major beating from the mother I simply used to stand in and say it was me who did it.

    Was never really afraid of the cane, never shied or hide from it, one thing I used to do is I'd offer to fetch the cane and simply took it, I suppose I did have a high tolerance for pain. I'd never scream or cry but I'd stay silent and stare at the person hitting me straight in the eye after it was over, mostly in defiance. When I was 10 or so, I was taller and bigger sized than the elder brother, since I knew I'd get the cane and he'd not even have so much as a slap on the wrist from the mother when it came to fighting I simply would throw all the punches I could at him, mainly at his face, belly and a couple of times on his balls. It was funny too, when I was 8 and 9, he used to say he was a Japanese Mitsubishi Zero fighter and I was the HMS Repulse, that he could send use the mother to hit me and sink me. When I was 10, I told him I'm the P-51 Mustang from the US Navy and my 2 fist were the M2 Brownings, I knew I'd get the cane from the mother so I bashed him up real good each time.

    When I was 12/13 parents decided to send me to England for boarding school. Many saw it that my parents were kicking me out of the house or were using their money to get rid of me so their 2 favoured kids didn't have someone that overshadowed them since for all the brat I was I generally did very well academically and excelled in sports. The years in England, got the cane twice from the housemaster, once for being late and the other for trying to take the blame for someone else.

    I suppose one thing the upbringing taught me was to go all out, thus if you have to risk it then risk it all because the punishment would had been the same anyway.

    My own kids, when the ex-wife (their mother) was still around I thought them one very simple equation, money = power = freedom, No money = got to listen to mamma. I never once hit any of my kids, I have other ways to motivate them to properly behave and end of the day I always believe that kids should be allowed to be kids.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Decorpi12)
    Thank you!! I hope you feel better soon
    Inshallah :jebus:

    Spoiler:
    Show
    I feel a bit better each day but t'will be weeks before I’m back on form :moon:

    Like the people on the link I put before, surely you don't think the way they described the process should be legal?
    These people are horrifically deluded

    Huge generalisation there Mr. Foo
    What does it matter how big a generalisation is if it’s accurate? (and it is) :dontknow:

    (because they spend most time with the child, on average)
    That’s certainly one explanation for it :holmes:

    I believe instilling an internal motivation to behave is most ideal. Then again, it is not always practical/attainable.
    Indeed so

    what have you got against young people you old grandpa?
    Nothing

    Spoiler:
    Show
    'Little buggers need some ruddy discipline!' :shakecane:

    In a more diplomatic way...yessss
    Is this the part where I feign outrage and attempt to defend myself?

    Spoiler:
    Show
    No

    Spoiler:
    Show
    Guilty as charged :judge:

    I don't know what to tell you...Don't want to disappoint you
    Heh, makes no difference to me, was just making a glib comment e.g. that most of us wouldn’t have cared were she hot

    Very true. I can't understand those guys. They have issues
    Aye, mostly either animals or haven’t been raised properly.. clearly weren’t spanked enough by their mothers as kids (see yahoo for reference) :mmm:
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I'm Indian so being smacked by my parents was inevitable. :rolleyes:
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Inshallah :jebus:
    Nshalla (You've been talking to lots of Arabs lately, Allah y3eenak (God help you) :P)

    Spoiler:
    Show
    I feel a bit better each day but t'will be weeks before I’m back on form :moon:
    I wish I could provide you with more than just moral support. I'd have fought that flu away with my bare hands! :P too bad I can't.
    Don't exert yourself too much
    These people are horrifically deluded
    See?? That's why the topic is so important to me. This should NOT be legally sanctioned.

    What does it matter how big a generalisation is if it’s accurate? (and it is) :dontknow:
    It's not very accurate, though. Many women do not have submissive personas, plus women in positions of authority "scare" (probably not the right word) me more than men in such positions do :P I always prefer male examiners to females. The women are so much more picky and mean (Not all of them, but the majority). Men are friendlier.

    That’s certainly one explanation for it :holmes:
    Other explanations wouldn't fall in line with your above assertation/generalisation that women are submissive. Or would they?


    Spoiler:
    Show
    'Little buggers need some ruddy discipline!' :shakecane:
    You'd make a cute grandpa :P
    Is this the part where I feign outrage and attempt to defend myself?

    Spoiler:
    Show
    No

    Spoiler:
    Show
    Guilty as charged :judge:
    Indeed! You know that it's a compliment
    Decorpi would never even dream of insulting Mr. Foo :rolleyes:
    Heh, makes no difference to me, was just making a glib comment e.g. that most of us wouldn’t have cared were she hot
    Yeah and I meant no she's not attractive (plus she's very angry)...could use somebody like you to "shape her up"

    [/QUOTE]clearly weren’t spanked enough by their mothers as kids (see yahoo for reference) :mmm:[/QUOTE]
    :lolwut::lolwut:
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: February 7, 2015
Poll
Who is your favourite TV detective?
Useful resources

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.