Beginning to think I'm undateable
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Original post by shawn_o1
All I need to do now is finish my degree and get a job. Raising kids? That's one thing I'll never be able to do.
Why?
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Original post by Anonymous
I hate to sound traditional... But do you think you are sleeping with too many men too soon? And then when it doesn't work out are settling to be the go-to-girl?
Also a note about POF... It is 99% trashy men/women yes there are a few doctors and lawyers there but any free site is going to be full of fakes, trash and casual seekers. You are better off investing in something paid that's a great trash filter.
Also a note about POF... It is 99% trashy men/women yes there are a few doctors and lawyers there but any free site is going to be full of fakes, trash and casual seekers. You are better off investing in something paid that's a great trash filter.
Clearly you've not read my post! I've only slept with ONE person out of the 5 guys I've dated (which was not meant to happen). 2 of them (former work colleague & body building man) tried to FORCE sex but I said no as I'm not into that.
Yes, I know the Internet dating sites are full of trash, but on the odd chance I was hoping I would find perhaps a decent guy as I didn't want to tarnish all with the same brush.
Original post by D_ecrivaine
I agree that the internet is not the place to go. In my opinion, you'd be very lucky to find a guy on there who is decent and not either desperate/has some fatal flaw or is just looking for a hookup.
Secondly, you weren't super clear about your intimacy with all the guys, but I think sleeping with a guy very early in the game is just telling them (if they're not good guys) they don't have to do much to get it. If you waited, maybe dated for a month or so (is that a long time? haha.) then you're getting to know them, they're seeing they need to respect you, etc..
Secondly, you weren't super clear about your intimacy with all the guys, but I think sleeping with a guy very early in the game is just telling them (if they're not good guys) they don't have to do much to get it. If you waited, maybe dated for a month or so (is that a long time? haha.) then you're getting to know them, they're seeing they need to respect you, etc..
I dated the FwB for a month before it went to FwB....crikey I didn't jump into bed with him on date 1 - sheesh!
Original post by DentistButcher
Quite simply OP you are hypergamous...you want better than you are.
Guys will have sex with girls below them but that is all, they don't want long term relationship with you...they don't want to walk down a high street with you on their arm.
You will continue to do this throughout your 20's bouncing from one guy to the next unable to make any commit due to your hypergamous ways. You will reach your 30's and realise you want kids and settle for mr average who doesn't excite you and then will have an existence of a sexless marriage with one child.
Enjoy your hypergamy whilst it lasts.
Guys will have sex with girls below them but that is all, they don't want long term relationship with you...they don't want to walk down a high street with you on their arm.
You will continue to do this throughout your 20's bouncing from one guy to the next unable to make any commit due to your hypergamous ways. You will reach your 30's and realise you want kids and settle for mr average who doesn't excite you and then will have an existence of a sexless marriage with one child.
Enjoy your hypergamy whilst it lasts.
Did you even read the ENTIRE thread?? And find out exactly how many of the above blokes I actually slept with?! In short = one? Which turned into FwB. Although as mentioned elsewhere in the thread it has only been 4/5 occasions as its boring as hell, and I've actually blown him off about a dozen times because I'm not interested in it! 2 of the blokes I dated tried to FORCE sex on me, or RAPE! I said no and actually managed to get away from it.
But I am glad you've been able to tarnish me with the same brush as women you've 'been working with'. Im not man hopping, these men are the ones leaving me, minus the FwB who won't leave me alone!!
Original post by DentistButcher
But true.
I work with about 5-6 women who are like this, they all fit the same mould. Pretty faces but chubby...but they still want top tier guys...who do have sex with them for short term or one night stands...but would never long term them.
OP will earn money so can support herself, she can go out a lot to restaurants and fancy bars...she gets attention off these guys online and when drunk so why settle for less. The day will come when she has to settle for less though, less than she would have in her 20's...when she is 30 she will be fatter, have more wrinkles and there will be less men to choose from.
Due to online dating and drunken lays...women think they're ranked higher than they are...you're ranked where you can long term.
I work with about 5-6 women who are like this, they all fit the same mould. Pretty faces but chubby...but they still want top tier guys...who do have sex with them for short term or one night stands...but would never long term them.
OP will earn money so can support herself, she can go out a lot to restaurants and fancy bars...she gets attention off these guys online and when drunk so why settle for less. The day will come when she has to settle for less though, less than she would have in her 20's...when she is 30 she will be fatter, have more wrinkles and there will be less men to choose from.
Due to online dating and drunken lays...women think they're ranked higher than they are...you're ranked where you can long term.
And thanks for the generalisations tjay I'm chubby. I'm actually size 10 but hey yiuve tarnished me with the brush, I'm chubby.
Original post by _Charlotte15
Because not everyone can. I know I won't be able to + I prefer my own company. Don't want my kid to feel "unwanted", therefore I won't have any
Original post by DentistButcher
size 10 is chubby
You're one delusional individual, considering you've never met me and are simply drawing dumb founded conclusions on an Internet forum.
The majority of people here have provided reasonably constructive criticism, which I take on board and will simply implement within my life. All you've done is childishly 'bash' me & write silly remarks which are flawed it's unreal.
I don't understand why my post on the meaning of life got deleted...too much reality to handle?
Original post by Anonymous
Last year/this year I met 5 guys:
. . Out of all of the above men, none of them have turned into relationships. Although friends have said it's them, not you, I am beginning to think it is me! A lot of the blokes (apart from the former work colleague), I met on PoF/Tinder. All appear to be fine until we meet. Dates (as far as I am aware go fine, although on my part I am a bit quiet purely because I can't get a word in edge ways because the men just talk, and talk and talk! But I am usually a very chatty person once I get comfortable with someone which may take a while.
I am thinking perhaps I am not cut out for dating?
It's just frustrating me no end. I am not looking to get settled right; get married, have a family and etc. I just would like to have a boyfriend, who I can hang out with, go places with, have a good time and enjoy life with. But that just seems like mission impossible. Everytime I see couples out and about, I get incredibly jealous because of what they have together, sometimes reducing myself to tears . . ridiculous, I know.
Don't really know what the point of this thread is really, but just wanted to find out from others really if anyone else has been in the same boat/dating situation? I'm not exactly getting any younger either - 29 in a few weeks, and I would preferably like to find a decent guy before I hit the big 3 0!
Thoughts? . . .
•
*Guy use to work for F1 Red Bull *met on Tinder in February 14* - Had 3 dates, now FwB, and it'll never be anything more
•
*Body Building fanatic - met on Tinder during summer 14. Had 3 dates. On the 3rd date he literally tried to have full blown sex with me in a random field, even though I said I wasn't interested in him in that way
•
*Royal Navy guy - met on PoF in December 14. 1 date - 27 yrs old, but has the mental age of a 4 year old
•
*DJ guy - met on PoF in December 14. 2 dates - most recent bloke I have dated, but I really do not know what has happened?! Last spoke on Wednesday, heard nothing since although he said I was the highlight of his day on our dinner date on Tuesday!
•
*Former work colleague - known for years. Used me as a rebound while he was on a break from his then ex gf - this I did not know.
. . Out of all of the above men, none of them have turned into relationships. Although friends have said it's them, not you, I am beginning to think it is me! A lot of the blokes (apart from the former work colleague), I met on PoF/Tinder. All appear to be fine until we meet. Dates (as far as I am aware go fine, although on my part I am a bit quiet purely because I can't get a word in edge ways because the men just talk, and talk and talk! But I am usually a very chatty person once I get comfortable with someone which may take a while.
I am thinking perhaps I am not cut out for dating?
It's just frustrating me no end. I am not looking to get settled right; get married, have a family and etc. I just would like to have a boyfriend, who I can hang out with, go places with, have a good time and enjoy life with. But that just seems like mission impossible. Everytime I see couples out and about, I get incredibly jealous because of what they have together, sometimes reducing myself to tears . . ridiculous, I know. Don't really know what the point of this thread is really, but just wanted to find out from others really if anyone else has been in the same boat/dating situation? I'm not exactly getting any younger either - 29 in a few weeks, and I would preferably like to find a decent guy before I hit the big 3 0!
Thoughts? . . .
u reek of desperation m8
like u know the damaged goods from supermarkets that they store in one reduced shelf and sell for discount? dats u. nobody got time 4 dat ma nigguh so smoke some green, chill and connect with dem vibes
x x x
Original post by shawn_o1
Because not everyone can. I know I won't be able to + I prefer my own company. Don't want my kid to feel "unwanted", therefore I won't have any
Ohhh okay 👍
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by mals94
u reek of desperation m8
like u know the damaged goods from supermarkets that they store in one reduced shelf and sell for discount? dats u. nobody got time 4 dat ma nigguh so smoke some green, chill and connect with dem vibes
x x x
like u know the damaged goods from supermarkets that they store in one reduced shelf and sell for discount? dats u. nobody got time 4 dat ma nigguh so smoke some green, chill and connect with dem vibes
x x x
Not desperate at all - jist tried my kick at online dating like millions of other people in the world.
Original post by mals94
u reek of desperation m8
like u know the damaged goods from supermarkets that they store in one reduced shelf and sell for discount? dats u. nobody got time 4 dat ma nigguh so smoke some green, chill and connect with dem vibes
x x x
like u know the damaged goods from supermarkets that they store in one reduced shelf and sell for discount? dats u. nobody got time 4 dat ma nigguh so smoke some green, chill and connect with dem vibes
x x x
Not desperate at all - just tried my luck at online dating like millions of other people in the world.
Original post by Anonymous
Last year/this year I met 5 guys:
. . Out of all of the above men, none of them have turned into relationships. Although friends have said it's them, not you, I am beginning to think it is me! A lot of the blokes (apart from the former work colleague), I met on PoF/Tinder. All appear to be fine until we meet. Dates (as far as I am aware go fine, although on my part I am a bit quiet purely because I can't get a word in edge ways because the men just talk, and talk and talk! But I am usually a very chatty person once I get comfortable with someone which may take a while.
I am thinking perhaps I am not cut out for dating? It's just frustrating me no end. I am not looking to get settled right; get married, have a family and etc. I just would like to have a boyfriend, who I can hang out with, go places with, have a good time and enjoy life with. But that just seems like mission impossible. Everytime I see couples out and about, I get incredibly jealous because of what they have together, sometimes reducing myself to tears . . ridiculous, I know.
Don't really know what the point of this thread is really, but just wanted to find out from others really if anyone else has been in the same boat/dating situation? I'm not exactly getting any younger either - 29 in a few weeks, and I would preferably like to find a decent guy before I hit the big 3 0!
Thoughts? . . .
•
*Guy use to work for F1 Red Bull *met on Tinder in February 14* - Had 3 dates, now FwB, and it'll never be anything more
•
*Body Building fanatic - met on Tinder during summer 14. Had 3 dates. On the 3rd date he literally tried to have full blown sex with me in a random field, even though I said I wasn't interested in him in that way
•
*Royal Navy guy - met on PoF in December 14. 1 date - 27 yrs old, but has the mental age of a 4 year old
•
*DJ guy - met on PoF in December 14. 2 dates - most recent bloke I have dated, but I really do not know what has happened?! Last spoke on Wednesday, heard nothing since although he said I was the highlight of his day on our dinner date on Tuesday!
•
*Former work colleague - known for years. Used me as a rebound while he was on a break from his then ex gf - this I did not know.
. . Out of all of the above men, none of them have turned into relationships. Although friends have said it's them, not you, I am beginning to think it is me! A lot of the blokes (apart from the former work colleague), I met on PoF/Tinder. All appear to be fine until we meet. Dates (as far as I am aware go fine, although on my part I am a bit quiet purely because I can't get a word in edge ways because the men just talk, and talk and talk! But I am usually a very chatty person once I get comfortable with someone which may take a while.
I am thinking perhaps I am not cut out for dating?
It's just frustrating me no end. I am not looking to get settled right; get married, have a family and etc. I just would like to have a boyfriend, who I can hang out with, go places with, have a good time and enjoy life with. But that just seems like mission impossible. Everytime I see couples out and about, I get incredibly jealous because of what they have together, sometimes reducing myself to tears . . ridiculous, I know. Don't really know what the point of this thread is really, but just wanted to find out from others really if anyone else has been in the same boat/dating situation? I'm not exactly getting any younger either - 29 in a few weeks, and I would preferably like to find a decent guy before I hit the big 3 0!
Thoughts? . . .
stop meeting losers off the internet and go out and get a life?
Original post by cole-slaw
stop meeting losers off the internet and go out and get a life?
I've tried my luck at online dating, like everyone else in the world. It hasn't worked so will just go and improve my social circle and etc.
Allow me to intervene. You speak of experiences with 0.001% of the potential roughly assumed pool of people in the UK you might date (5 million). It is entirely likely they just suck, or more accurately, your interaction with them as a third entity just sucks. Also, I would advice working on yourself first, rather than expecting another person to "complement" or "improve" you or your life by chance as revealed in a date. The set-up is just... not very conductive to that.
Meh. Some of these responses are a little harsh..nothing wrong with giving these things a go. There are good apples on these websites, it's a little hit and miss though. I haven't really had any bad experiences, I make sure I spend time getting to know people and I trust my judgements. I can tell of someone is worth my time early on. That being said it's easy for people to pretend to be something they're not. How long do you spend talking to these guys before meeting up?
Original post by Anonymous
I've tried my luck at online dating, like everyone else in the world. It hasn't worked so will just go and improve my social circle and etc.
Like everyone else in the world? Seriously?
I think you're mistaken. Very few people are forced to resort to googling for company. If you have an active social life, you meet more prospective partners on a weekly basis than you would ever have time to date.
Online dating is self-selection. You're restricting yourself to people who can't get a date the normal way - ie losers. Why would you want to date a loser?
Original post by Flying Cookie
Allow me to intervene. You speak of experiences with 0.001% of the potential roughly assumed pool of people in the UK you might date (5 million). It is entirely likely they just suck, or more accurately, your interaction with them as a third entity just sucks. Also, I would advice working on yourself first, rather than expecting another person to "complement" or "improve" you or your life by chance as revealed in a date. The set-up is just... not very conductive to that.
The last 2 dates (Mr Navy and Mr DJ) talked and talked and talked! The conversation was dominated with them telling me everything about themselves. I tried to intervene but the conversation always went back to them. I've spoken to my mum about them all and she said "You don't want to date someone who just talks about themselves morning noon and night", and I think she's right. I'm very guarded in that I don't reveal every single detail about myself during the early dating phase. Perhaps that's what has gone against me, I don't know. But I'd rather remain a little quiet and reserved, rather than a loud mouth bint who reveals every nook and cranny detail about myself.
Not only that when you've been raped, had sex forced upon you, you temain incredibly guarded and cautious. I've tried my upmost best to put that experiment behind me and just get on my life. So I am sorry if what I have put in this thread sounds like its all my fault and etc, but I'm doing my damn best.
Original post by cole-slaw
Like everyone else in the world? Seriously?
I think you're mistaken. Very few people are forced to resort to googling for company. If you have an active social life, you meet more prospective partners on a weekly basis than you would ever have time to date.
Online dating is self-selection. You're restricting yourself to people who can't get a date the normal way - ie losers. Why would you want to date a loser?
I think you're mistaken. Very few people are forced to resort to googling for company. If you have an active social life, you meet more prospective partners on a weekly basis than you would ever have time to date.
Online dating is self-selection. You're restricting yourself to people who can't get a date the normal way - ie losers. Why would you want to date a loser?
There are millions of people who have tried online dating, fact. Yes people also date people who've they met in their social circles, fact. I've done both but it so happens that I've met more people online than from my social circle.
I've tried my hand at online dating and it doesn't work for me. No biggy. So I'll just improve my social circle and see ehat happens.
Original post by Anonymous
I've tried my hand at online dating and it doesn't work for me. .
I've tried my hand at online dating and it doesn't work for me. .
I could have told you that 12 months ago and saved you the bother. Unless you have serious self-esteem issues and actively want to date selfish socially inept losers, online dating is a complete waste of time.
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