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Friendzone a myth or fact ? watch

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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)

    I didn't suddenly transform into an Adonis, maturity/manliness are factors too (the evidence suggests this) :dontknow:

    which is a subset of attractiveness, no?
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    (Original post by IMBCFC)
    What do you think ?

    Usually when you get friendzoned by a girl it means your not boyfriend material and generally she dosent see you as someone who she wants a relationship with.

    However some people post online crap that says you can get out of the friendzone and possibly be in a relationship with her. Realistically if she doesnt like you, you are not going to be in a relationship with her are you ?

    Myth or fact ?
    your actually wrong,it might mean that she's not ready for a relationship or maybe one of her friend likes you...and I agree with you,women no's are no's,you can't change that
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Ah ok, well I'll have to take your word on that one! (yet to tour Eastern Europe)

    Ah, so you're a bit of a nerd/geek yourself eh? :gah: Just as long as you're a cute geekette, it's all good

    Guilty why?

    To become a more rounded, personable, feminine, approachable, wonderful, individual? :hippie:

    I'm not sure I follow?

    You hope.. wicked child! We should be pleased for them and wish them every happiness! (although I suppose one has to acknowledge the statistical probability..) :erm:

    We've established that I can read people..

    I didn't suddenly transform into an Adonis, maturity/manliness are factors too (the evidence suggests this) :dontknow:
    Ah, but you see, we only established that you like the idea of being able to read people, hehe.

    Guilty because I could/should know all that stuff. I'm having my exam session right now, I already disappointed a teacher=>guilt (although who made her expect high grades from me). Guilt for being lazy, to summarize. ))

    I must support you on the last paragraph, before high school I've been told I'm ugly/etc by pretty much every peer (that was not a friend), so things like this can change. But on the other hand, those peers told me lots of stupid stuff, and the only thing that changed ever since was the peers (smarter in high school, I guess). So yea, either the type of girls around you has changed, either something's fishy. (I got plenty of examples of ugly/gay-looking guys starting working out in high school -and now with a lot of muscles- and they still never had a gf)

    The part you couldn't follow: I am not romantic/feminine, and with no desire whatsoever to get married => minority between my dear brainwashed mates.

    I am sarcastic and sometimes funny, so I got that going for me, which is nice.

    So, may I ask again: why soften? Am I supposed to act like world's a wonderful place full of butterflies and my 'soul mate' is just around the corner? Should I say to myself that soul mates exist, so I'd feel better? (religion stuff on the same principle). I'd rather look at life as it is, so I'll have a chance at actually achieving my goals (which by default won't be realistic for most people because of what I just mentioned).
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    which is a subset of attractiveness, no?
    For sure, 'cultured' attraction; however, (reasonably) objectively 'attractive' (e.g. aesthetics) guys do occasionally get friendzoned (contrary to what you seemed to be suggesting), for example because they have not cultivated themselves sufficiently in other areas or because they simply aren't a girl's 'type'

    (Original post by emanueladiana)
    Ah, but you see, we only established that you like the idea of being able to read people, hehe
    I’m sure if we are honest we can agree that we established something of a demonstrated capacity :sly:

    Guilty because I could/should know all that stuff
    Can you give me any examples of this ‘extra curricular’ stuff that you should know – perhaps something has got lost in translation. In the UK this usually means interests outside of conventional academia, which are purely optional and no source of guilt (unless they are completely lacking, in which case I suppose one may feel guilty for being a little ‘one dimensional’?). Oh, another use of ‘extra curricular’ is a little naughty, btw :mmm:

    I'm having my exam session right now
    You take night classes?:mute:

    I already disappointed a teacher=>guilt (although who made her expect high grades from me). Guilt for being lazy, to summarize. ))
    Ah right, well, there are those who are of the belief that a little such guilt is good medicine! I’m not sure how I feel about the philosophy of education when it comes to that psychological component – I know some students benefit from such motivation but it seems rather negative to me, and can’t help e.g. with exam nerves etc

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    Luckily I have never suffered thusly, although I have felt regret, never guilt, as such :beard: (the joy of being a narcissist: nothing is ever my fault) :woo:

    So yea, either the type of girls around you has changed, either something's fishy. (I got plenty of examples of ugly/gay-looking guys starting working out in high school -and now with a lot of muscles- and they still never had a gf)
    My behaviour changed, and my looks matured a little (I still look very young for my age, but at least I look like an adult now) :laugh:

    I am not romantic/feminine, and with no desire whatsoever to get married => minority between my dear brainwashed mates
    Aha, hence compsci! :teeth:

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    Who knows, perhaps one day you’ll magically transform into Cinderella :dancing:

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    No wonder you have quite fixed attitudes towards boys and sex etc! :holmes:

    I am sarcastic and sometimes funny, so I got that going for me, which is nice
    That’s cool. I would just urge a little caution, too much sarcasm can totally kill a date – I remember one date with a girl who was sarcastic the whole night. It was funny at first, and we had many good laughs, but by the end of the date I didn’t have a clue whether she liked me or the whole date was just one big joke to her. When she asked me for a 2nd date I was rather confused, and agreed but never arranged it with her, unfortunately she kind of killed any chemistry with all that sarcastic banter :dontknow:

    Am I supposed to act like world's a wonderful place full of butterflies and my 'soul mate' is just around the corner?
    Yes :daydreaming:

    Should I say to myself that soul mates exist, so I'd feel better?
    Yes :daydreaming:

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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    If you feel it;
    How can you deny it?
    If you don't;
    How can you say you won't?

    #RomancePoetryBro

    I'd rather look at life as it is, so I'll have a chance at actually achieving my goals (which by default won't be realistic for most people because of what I just mentioned)
    Seriously, if that works for you, and delivers a balanced, healthy, happy life, then you go for it
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    For sure, 'cultured' attraction; however, (reasonably) objectively 'attractive' (e.g. aesthetics) guys do occasionally get friendzoned (contrary to what you seemed to be suggesting), for example because they have not cultivated themselves sufficiently in other areas or because they simply aren't a girl's 'type'
    Did I suggest that? Or are you projecting?
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    For sure, 'cultured' attraction; however, (reasonably) objectively 'attractive' (e.g. aesthetics) guys do occasionally get friendzoned (contrary to what you seemed to be suggesting), for example because they have not cultivated themselves sufficiently in other areas or because they simply aren't a girl's 'type'

    I’m sure if we are honest we can agree that we established something of a demonstrated capacity :sly:

    Can you give me any examples of this ‘extra curricular’ stuff that you should know – perhaps something has got lost in translation. In the UK this usually means interests outside of conventional academia, which are purely optional and no source of guilt (unless they are completely lacking, in which case I suppose one may feel guilty for being a little ‘one dimensional’?). Oh, another use of ‘extra curricular’ is a little naughty, btw :mmm:

    You take night classes?:mute:

    Ah right, well, there are those who are of the belief that a little such guilt is good medicine! I’m not sure how I feel about the philosophy of education when it comes to that psychological component – I know some students benefit from such motivation but it seems rather negative to me, and can’t help e.g. with exam nerves etc

    Spoiler:
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    Luckily I have never suffered thusly, although I have felt regret, never guilt, as such :beard: (the joy of being a narcissist: nothing is ever my fault) :woo:

    My behaviour changed, and my looks matured a little (I still look very young for my age, but at least I look like an adult now) :laugh:

    Aha, hence compsci! :teeth:

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    Who knows, perhaps one day you’ll magically transform into Cinderella :dancing:

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    No wonder you have quite fixed attitudes towards boys and sex etc! :holmes:

    That’s cool. I would just urge a little caution, too much sarcasm can totally kill a date – I remember one date with a girl who was sarcastic the whole night. It was funny at first, and we had many good laughs, but by the end of the date I didn’t have a clue whether she liked me or the whole date was just one big joke to her. When she asked me for a 2nd date I was rather confused, and agreed but never arranged it with her, unfortunately she kind of killed any chemistry with all that sarcastic banter :dontknow:

    Yes :daydreaming:

    Yes :daydreaming:


    Seriously, if that works for you, and delivers a balanced, healthy, happy life, then you go for it
    Well firstly and most important, mon amie, I do not act sarcastic with guys because...well, because of what you just said. I am sweet&funny. Oh, if they only knew.

    Secondly, you can read me so well because I let you read me, do not let yourself fooled too much!

    Next in line to discuss is the meaning of extracurricular. By such word (I regret not having read Shakespeare in English) I mean programming languages that we were not taught in school, such as Java, Oracle, CSS etc. I might move my lazy ass to learn Java this year, it's in high demand on the market.

    Now right now, but I'm sure you understood what I meant.

    I like Bella, she's alright.

    Also, I shall have you know that I like reading, writing short stories&poetry, and drawing (bonus: I'm a leftie), so by no means I have 'fixed attitudes'. I'm a self-proclaimed artist with inclinations towards numbers.

    Finally, an observation: a balanced life rarely means a happy one (If we agree that stupid people rarely have balanced lives because they tend to think short term, do not take into consideration consequences as they should, and thus, they are prone to make bad decisions in life. And smart people are not usually happy because... well, because they are smart)
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    Did I suggest that? Or are you projecting?
    Usually when people talk about "attractive guys", they are referring to 'conventionally attractive' e.g. those broadly conceived of as aesthetically pleasing. If this was not your intention but you instead meant, for example, "guys who the girl in question finds attractive",* then this would seem a lot less controversial, if a little tautological; I would still protest, however, that girls can friendzone a guy they find attractive e.g. on the basis of (presumed) character defects/fundamental mismatch, although naturally I would concede that this is rarely absolute

    (Original post by emanueladiana)
    Well firstly and most important, mon amie
    We are not friends

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    :reel:

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    Comedic reverse-psychology is not beneath me, contrary to what you may presume :mmm:

    I do not act sarcastic with guys because...well, because of what you just said. I am sweet&funny
    Jolly good, poor young lads can’t take too many japes, delicate egos ‘n’ all.. :cry2:

    Oh, if they only knew
    If only they knew?..

    you can read me so well because I let you read me, do not let yourself fooled too much!
    For sure, it takes two to tango, as we say :fan:

    programming languages that we were not taught in school, such as Java, Oracle, CSS etc. I might move my lazy ass to learn Java this year, it's in high demand on the market
    Ah right, yes, might be as well to add another string to your bow. They do keep insisting that they run Java on over 3 billion devices so, you know.. if you ever need to communicate with I dunno, a photocopier or something, I guess it might come in handy :borat:

    Now right now, but I'm sure you understood what I meant
    Well thank goodness for that, tests at this time of night wouldn’t be much fun!- that said, I perform best at night, personally :sexface: (that sounded more innocent in my head) :innocent:

    I like Bella, she's alright
    Bella?

    I shall have you know that I like reading, writing short stories&poetry, and drawing
    How positively charming :cute:

    bonus: I'm a leftie
    Ah well, can’t all be perfect Would you friendzone a guy on the basis of his right-wing political beliefs? (he says, attempting to keep this on topic)

    so by no means I have 'fixed attitudes'
    Hold up :hand: Just because you lefties like to 'move the goal posts' (and don’t know where they are half the time) does not mean you don’t have ‘fixed attitudes’! :laugh:

    I'm a self-proclaimed artist with inclinations towards numbers
    Please, tell me more.. :daydreaming:

    a balanced life rarely means a happy one (If we agree that stupid people rarely have balanced lives because they tend to think short term, do not take into consideration consequences as they should, and thus, they are prone to make bad decisions in life. And smart people are not usually happy because... well, because they are smart)
    Hmm, I was with you regarding short-sighted* people, and I suppose I agree that a more sophisticated mind is rarely satisfied, but I believe that balance/cohesion and happiness are generally positive correlates :beard:
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Usually when people talk about "attractive guys", they are referring to 'conventionally attractive' e.g. those broadly conceived of as aesthetically pleasing. If this was not your intention but you instead meant, for example, "guys who the girl in question finds attractive",* then this would seem a lot less controversial, if a little tautological; I would still protest, however, that girls can friendzone a guy they find attractive e.g. on the basis of (presumed) character defects/fundamental mismatch, although naturally I would concede that this is rarely absolute

    We are not friends

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    :reel:

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    Comedic reverse-psychology is not beneath me, contrary to what you may presume :mmm:

    Jolly good, poor young lads can’t take too many japes, delicate egos ‘n’ all.. :cry2:

    If only they knew?..

    For sure, it takes two to tango, as we say :fan:

    Ah right, yes, might be as well to add another string to your bow. They do keep insisting that they run Java on over 3 billion devices so, you know.. if you ever need to communicate with I dunno, a photocopier or something, I guess it might come in handy :borat:

    Well thank goodness for that, tests at this time of night wouldn’t be much fun!- that said, I perform best at night, personally :sexface: (that sounded more innocent in my head) :innocent:

    Bella?

    How positively charming :cute:

    Ah well, can’t all be perfect Would you friendzone a guy on the basis of his right-wing political beliefs? (he says, attempting to keep this on topic)

    Hold up :hand: Just because you lefties like to 'move the goal posts' (and don’t know where they are half the time) does not mean you don’t have ‘fixed attitudes’! :laugh:

    Please, tell me more.. :daydreaming:

    Hmm, I was with you regarding short-sighted* people, and I suppose I agree that a more sophisticated mind is rarely satisfied, but I believe that balance/cohesion and happiness are generally positive correlates :beard:
    Bella. Like, in Beauty and the Beast? I finally saw the *ehem* movie last year and I thought I was less stupid than the others (how the f could you choke to death on an apple).

    The rest of what you wrote is very confusing, not sure if sarcastic or not.

    Friendzoning a guy for the wrong political beliefs? I can't be friends with somebody I don't agree with at such basic stuff (and, to be perfectly clear, any political view I deem as wrong at national level) [having a Queen does sound medieval, in that wonderful, GoT, way. ^^] {my city is one of the oldest ones in the country and we still partially have the city's wall and protecting system since that age}
    Here. Have some snow.
    http://brasovdaytrips.com/web_images...in_zapada2.jpg

    I kind of lost it, didn't I
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Usually when people talk about "attractive guys", they are referring to 'conventionally attractive' e.g. those broadly conceived of as aesthetically pleasing. If this was not your intention but you instead meant, for example, "guys who the girl in question finds attractive",* then this would seem a lot less controversial, if a little tautological; I would still protest, however, that girls can friendzone a guy they find attractive e.g. on the basis of (presumed) character defects/fundamental mismatch, although naturally I would concede that this is rarely absolute
    You and I might find it tautological, but I assure you, the majority of TSR are less well informed.

    It also answers the OP's question in a simple yet entirely accurate and comprehensive manner.

    How do you avoid being friendzoned? answer, be attractive

    Why am I in the friendzoned? answer, because you are unattractive

    How do I get out of the friendzone? answer, become more attractive
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    (Original post by emanueladiana)
    Bella. Like, in Beauty and the Beast? I finally saw the *ehem* movie last year and I thought I was less stupid than the others (how the f could you choke to death on an apple)
    I'm not sure where Beauty and the Beast came into it but ok.. I preferred Aladin, personally (think it was perhaps the last Disney movie I saw as a child?)

    The rest of what you wrote is very confusing, not sure if sarcastic or not
    They call me 'The Confuser' :smug:

    Friendzoning a guy for the wrong political beliefs? I can't be friends with somebody I don't agree with at such basic stuff
    Interesting. So you can't be friends - but could you be lovers with somebody you don't agree with? :mmm:

    I can, although quite how sustainable it would be is a mystery. I find girls tend to gravitate toward my political ideals.. as I slowly pollute their minds :evilbanana:

    any political view I deem as wrong at national level
    Do you consider yourself some kind of authority on politics at your tender age?

    having a Queen does sound medieval, in that wonderful, GoT, way
    Admit it, you would love to have our 'heritage', and all the related hangovers from such a bygone age e.g. including our funky monarchy! :horse:

    my city is one of the oldest ones in the country and we still partially have the city's wall and protecting system since that age
    Thanks for the info, how fascinating :gah:

    We still have a hunk of Roman wall here in London, but really a lot of the historical sites have been built over/tunnelled under.. 'that's progress folks' :rolleyes:

    Here. Have some snow
    Why thank you.. how picturesque!

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    *Apparently she does have a soft/romantic side after all!* :girl:

    I kind of lost it, didn't I
    Not at all, my dear :top2:

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    (this is what English gentlemen say to make someone feel better about a situation)

    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    It answers the OP's question in a simple yet entirely accurate and comprehensive manner
    But for the exceptions noted, aye

    How do you avoid being friendzoned? answer, be attractive

    Why am I in the friendzoned? answer, because you are unattractive

    How do I get out of the friendzone? answer, become more attractive
    Generally true, although the last point rather leaves your average friendzoned TSRian all at sea:captain:
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    I don't see how it can be a myth, its a real concept.

    Its when a women doesn't see you as potential partner.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    So the evidence says one thing, but you choose to believe another as its easier on the ego. Whatever gets you through the day.
    Foo got a thread made about him since he is so good looking.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    Nerds are people with poor social skills, poor hygiene, poor life skills that they have such limited life opportunities that they chose to retreat into an unhealthy fantasy world of comics and computer games.

    Its sad really, someone needs to intervene in these people's lives and convince them they're throwing their lives away.


    You are such a knob head. Do you know that?
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    it's just something guys made up so they didn't feel bad about being rejected.
    you don't hear girls saying "oh, he friendzoned me... maybe if i'm nice to him he'll change his mind.." NO when a girls rejected she'll be sad but move straight on. Don't waste your time in an imaginary "friendzone" She don't want it, you don't have it, move on.
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    I'm not sure where Beauty and the Beast came into it but ok.. I preferred Aladin, personally (think it was perhaps the last Disney movie I saw as a child?)

    They call me 'The Confuser' :smug:

    Interesting. So you can't be friends - but could you be lovers with somebody you don't agree with? :mmm:

    I can, although quite how sustainable it would be is a mystery. I find girls tend to gravitate toward my political ideals.. as I slowly pollute their minds :evilbanana:

    Do you consider yourself some kind of authority on politics at your tender age?

    Admit it, you would love to have our 'heritage', and all the related hangovers from such a bygone age e.g. including our funky monarchy! :horse:

    Thanks for the info, how fascinating :gah:

    We still have a hunk of Roman wall here in London, but really a lot of the historical sites have been built over/tunnelled under.. 'that's progress folks' :rolleyes:

    Why thank you.. how picturesque!

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    *Apparently she does have a soft/romantic side after all!* :girl:

    Not at all, my dear :top2:

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    (this is what English gentlemen say to make someone feel better about a situation)

    But for the exceptions noted, aye

    Generally true, although the last point rather leaves your average friendzoned TSRian all at sea:captain:
    You said something about princesses, I'm too lazy to search for it.

    Define 'lovers'. I date a lot of guys that I don't even respect (stupid), dating is usually just a hobby for me.

    I'm not at all into politics, actually. I have my reasons.

    I'm actually very proud of Romania's history, I'm just ashamed of its present.
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    (Original post by emanueladiana)
    You said something about princesses, I'm too lazy to search for it
    Ah ok!

    Define 'lovers'. I date a lot of guys that I don't even respect (stupid), dating is usually just a hobby for me
    A lover is someone you are intimate with. What's the point in dating lots of guys you don't respect? :dontknow:

    I'm not at all into politics, actually. I have my reasons
    'Human science' vs. computer science :teeth:

    I'm actually very proud of Romania's history
    Good for you!

    I'm just ashamed of its present
    Is it really shameful? :sad:
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Ah ok!

    A lover is someone you are intimate with. What's the point in dating lots of guys you don't respect? :dontknow:

    'Human science' vs. computer science :teeth:

    Good for you!

    Is it really shameful? :sad:
    Yup. For me, at least. Beautiful country, too bad it's populated (ofc, I'm generalizing here)

    As I said, hobby. It's one of the things I do for fun. I love the first dates, before you get to know the other person, they're full of potential.
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    If the boy who likes the girls is ugly, then DEFFO friendzoned! But if theyre both decent, he likes her first, she will deny it. After a while she will 100% like him back. Friendzone is only true if one is ugly or something unattractive eg. his personality is crap.

    Source: I thought he was a brother to me but he liked me for two years. I friendzoned him. Then fell in love with him. For one year I hid it, we never told eachother, it became awkward and we never spoke again.
    btw girls don't plan to friendzone. You either like the guy or you don't. The don't is called friendzone for some dumb reason.
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    (Original post by ChaoticButterfly)
    You are such a knob head. Do you know that?
    with all due respect, you're the one with one friends and no hope of ever finding a girlfriend, not me. I've tried to help you in the past, but I think you might actually be beyond help.




    So ask yourself, CB, who's really the knobhead here?
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    How's this for friendzone..
    Met a girl through work, she was a customer who shopped were I worked..anyway we got to know each other, swapped details and chat all the time on the phone or whatsapp, then decided to actually go out for an evening.
    I thought it was a date, we got on really well, and turned out she was meant to be seeing someone else that night, but she chose me over him..weyhey great I thought..then it came to the end of the night, and she had to leave to go over someones house..turns out the guy she was meant to be seeing, but she was only going to see him for an hour or so for sex, but it was great to spend time with me..umm ok..I didnt even get a kiss goodnight!
    We stayed in touch, and decided to go out again as I had been forced to quit my job so she got me out of the house to cheer me up. Again got on really well, things went well, drink was consumed. By about 2-3am it was time to call it a night, so we left the club, called a taxi..she decided she wanted to stay in town actually now, so I went home. She told me a day or two later she ended up going back to some guys for sex then had to walk home at 5am on her own as she had no money left for a taxi.
    But still, being the friend I am, we went out again, bowling and for drinks just before xmas. When the drink started flowing, she was saying how im one of her best friends, im always there to support her, she doesnt know what she'd do without me. But also that we'd never be anything more than just friends, and after we had finished for the night, she was going over some random guys she knew in town's place because she was feeling horny and really wanted sex, and hoped I got home safely. Not even a peck on the cheek.

    Spurned 3 times in a row for other guys..if thats not friendzoned I don't know what is!
 
 
 
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