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    (Original post by neal95)
    They are only frowned upon when "Sikh" women insist on marrying a non Sikh person in the gurdwara, disrespecting the tradition of anand karaj purely for the photo opportunity. The whole point of the ceremony is the Union of 2 souls before the guru and if the spouse to be doesn't believe in Sikhism, then how can he understand what is happening and the significance of it. It's disrespectful. However sikhi has no problem with inter racial marriages and I have loads of half English cousins. You simply get a registry marriage and have a party afterwards if that's your desire. Loads of Sikhs marry poles as well
    Yes I've said this, it's only frowned upon when it comes to the Anand karaj. But tbh, I have in my family many cousins who have obviously been married in the Gurdwara but they don't understand what is going on, but simply for tradition. That is not okay in my opinion, it's the same as someone from a different faith getting married in the gurdwara.
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    Yes I've said this, it's only frowned upon when it comes to the Anand karaj. But tbh, I have in my family many cousins who have obviously been married in the Gurdwara but they don't understand what is going on, but simply for tradition. That is not okay in my opinion, it's the same as someone from a different faith getting married in the gurdwara.
    I completely agree, that's not okay.
    In fact originally, one could only have an anand Karaj if they had taken Amrit and therefore were a practicing Sikh (which is how it should be).
    The British raj heavily influenced sikhi, and caused a major dilution.

    But yes, I agree with your point, anand karajs like that shouldn't happen. Hopefully in time, it will become a reality


    When a vessel of water is overflowing, do you first start emptying the water, or do you first turn off the tap to stop new water coming in?

    You turn off the tap right?

    Hope you get that analogy
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    (Original post by TheALevelStudent)
    I completely agree, that's not okay.
    In fact originally, one could only have an anand Karaj if they had taken Amrit and therefore were a practicing Sikh (which is how it should be).
    The British raj heavily influenced sikhi, and caused a major dilution.

    But yes, I agree with your point, anand karajs like that shouldn't happen. Hopefully in time, it will become a reality
    I agree. Another thing that bothers me slightly is the filming and the whole theatrical perspective on the Anand Karaj. It's takes meaning away from the ceremony all together. (That might be a slightly controversial opinion, but it's how I feel).

    Another really controversial opinion my mum brought up was the whole modestly element to the bride, how most of the time the bride isn't covered appropriately to be sitting infront of Guru Granth Sahib Ji. I am honestly not going to lie, she is completely right. It isn't appropriate attire. It isn't very respectful either.

    The whole Anand Karaj ceremony is there for two people, deeply connected with God, you shouldn't take away meaning from that.
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    I agree. Another thing that bothers me slightly is the filming and the whole theatrical perspective on the Anand Karaj. It's takes meaning away from the ceremony all together. (That might be a slightly controversial opinion, but it's how I feel).

    Another really controversial opinion my mum brought up was the whole modestly element to the bride, how most of the time the bride isn't covered appropriately to be sitting infront of Guru Granth Sahib Ji. I am honestly not going to lie, she is completely right. It isn't appropriate attire. It isn't very respectful either.

    The whole Anand Karaj ceremony is there for two people, deeply connected with God, you shouldn't take away meaning from that.
    Lol yeah sometimes the camera guys can be annoying! They would literally punch, kick and push anyone out the way to get the right shot lol!
    But I think that's due to modern society, and how they want to capture everything. Even if you go to a concert, most people will be recording it on their phones. We as a generation need to learn to live in the moment more.

    Yeahhh that's completely true. In an amritdhari wedding (the way it should be done), the bride and groom both wear a chola/bana. It's basically just a really simple dress which covers everything appropriately.

    Most people who are fortunate enough to have an anand Karaj these days are not deeply connected to God, I bet they don't even know what's going on themselves and are only their as they see it as ritualistic thing, their main focus being on the after party (which is another completely stupid aspect, coming from the gurdwara and getting drunk at a party).
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    (Original post by TheALevelStudent)
    Lol yeah sometimes the camera guys can be annoying! They would literally punch, kick and push anyone out the way to get the right shot lol!
    But I think that's due to modern society, and how they want to capture everything. Even if you go to a concert, most people will be recording it on their phones. We as a generation need to learn to live in the moment more.

    Yeahhh that's completely true. In an amritdhari wedding (the way it should be done), the bride and groom both wear a chola/bana. It's basically just a really simple dress which covers everything appropriately.

    Most people who are fortunate enough to have an anand Karaj these days are not deeply connected to God, I bet they don't even know what's going on themselves and are only their as they see it as ritualistic thing, their main focus being on the after party (which is another completely stupid aspect, coming from the gurdwara and getting drunk at a party).
    Lol IKR Standing on walls and in neighbours gardens to get the right shot LMAO! XD So true!

    But still, meh, record everything else but there is no need to be recording inside the Gurdwara. My mum has always told me that when you're at the Gurdwara you do everything in your power not to distract someone as they are attempting to connect with God (which is why they are there). What is more distracting than a stupid camera in the Gurdwara? That is the same reason my mum always told me that men and women should dress appropriately to the Gurdwara, not to distract anybody, don't really see why the rules change for the Bride and Groom.

    They don't know, they really don't. I know that family members have to tap the Bride and Groom on the leg to tell them to get up now....

    OMG YES I AGREE! When I was little and very religious, I would have a huge debate in the car with my mum as to why we are going to a party on Sunday after going to the Gurdwara where meat and Alcohol will be served! lol but it's true, either have a Sikh wedding or don't, don't stick your foot in the middle of it, you shouldn't be able to have it both ways.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Actually our holy scripture doesn't mention anything about us not being allowed to marry Muslims, or any non-Sikhs.

    Who told you that anyway?
    Do you not know anything about Sikh history? Maybe you should read up on the sacrifices of the Gurus, especially Guru Gobind Singh ji.
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    Lol IKR Standing on walls and in neighbours gardens to get the right shot LMAO! XD So true!

    But still, meh, record everything else but there is no need to be recording inside the Gurdwara. My mum has always told me that when you're at the Gurdwara you do everything in your power not to distract someone as they are attempting to connect with God (which is why they are there). What is more distracting than a stupid camera in the Gurdwara? That is the same reason my mum always told me that men and women should dress appropriately to the Gurdwara, not to distract anybody, don't really see why the rules change for the Bride and Groom.

    They don't know, they really don't. I know that family members have to tap the Bride and Groom on the leg to tell them to get up now....

    OMG YES I AGREE! When I was little and very religious, I would have a huge debate in the car with my mum as to why we are going to a party on Sunday after going to the Gurdwara where meat and Alcohol will be served! lol but it's true, either have a Sikh wedding or don't, don't stick your foot in the middle of it, you shouldn't be able to have it both ways.
    Yeah it's a tricky one really. As the anand Karaj is for the bride and the groom, so as long as they are focused then it's alright? Idk. Maybe the gurdwara should invest in some fixed cameras, that record the ceremony, so there is less distractions of the camera man pretending to be Spider-Man and hanging down from the ceiling lmaoo.

    Yeah ikr! Asking their parents which way round to go, and when to sit down etc!!

    Couldn't agree more! Cultural impacts have influenced it so much.
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    (Original post by TheALevelStudent)
    Yeah it's a tricky one really. As the anand Karaj is for the bride and the groom, so as long as they are focused then it's alright? Idk. Maybe the gurdwara should invest in some fixed cameras, that record the ceremony, so there is less distractions of the camera man pretending to be Spider-Man and hanging down from the ceiling lmaoo.

    Yeah ikr! Asking their parents which way round to go, and when to sit down etc!!

    Couldn't agree more! Cultural impacts have influenced it so much.
    Oh my gosh, I actually can't stop laughing at that, I'm dying XD It's so true ahahaha. Yeah fixing cameras somewhere is a better idea, but honestly the camera and the man are irritating and distracting. OH GOD I ACC CAN'T STOP LAUGHING! XD XD Spider-man hanging from the ceiling?! XD

    Ik, once one of my distant cousins almost got up at the wrong time, and everyone was holding their breath like "don't stand up, don't stand up"... It's bad.

    Yes definitely!
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    Oh my gosh, I actually can't stop laughing at that, I'm dying XD It's so true ahahaha. Yeah fixing cameras somewhere is a better idea, but honestly the camera and the man are irritating and distracting. OH GOD I ACC CAN'T STOP LAUGHING! XD XD Spider-man hanging from the ceiling?! XD

    Ik, once one of my distant cousins almost got up at the wrong time, and everyone was holding their breath like "don't stand up, don't stand up"... It's bad.

    Yes definitely!
    It's the truth lmao! These days people have started bringing cranes in as well!? Like what you gonna do with a crane? Gonna knock out the clueless groom as he hopelessly tries to find his way round.

    Lol, it can be a nerving experience. I'm pretty sure some of the old uncles place bets on whether the groom will do something wrong rofl 😂😂
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    Depends on how religious you both are - are either of you willing to convert? Do either of you wear turban or hijab? Are your parents British-born? Parents born in the UK are more lenient and usually not as religious so I would say go for it. If you're obviously both very religious though, or if she wears a hijab, and no one is willing to convert, and if her parents are strict, then I would say avoid it. It would cause a lot of tensions in both families so you just need to make your own judgement really on how both parents will react.
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    (Original post by TheALevelStudent)
    Rehatnama Bhai Chaupai Singh:

    Natha Guru Ke Sikh naal karai

    Translating to: Marriage (natha) should be done to a sikh of the guru.
    I have never read that for myself in the Guru Granth Sahib.
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    #1

    (Original post by neal95)
    They are only frowned upon when "Sikh" women insist on marrying a non Sikh person in the gurdwara, disrespecting the tradition of anand karaj purely for the photo opportunity. The whole point of the ceremony is the Union of 2 souls before the guru and if the spouse to be doesn't believe in Sikhism, then how can he understand what is happening and the significance of it. It's disrespectful. However sikhi has no problem with inter racial marriages and I have loads of half English cousins. You simply get a registry marriage and have a party afterwards if that's your desire. Loads of Sikhs marry poles as well
    I agree with this.
    But just wondering, do loads of Sikhs marry Muslims? Because I do not know any.
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    (Original post by SGHD26716)
    Do you not know anything about Sikh history? Maybe you should read up on the sacrifices of the Gurus, especially Guru Gobind Singh ji.
    I know about the history.
    And what do you mean by sacrifices?
    I don't see how that reflects this topic.
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    Wow, OP you really like this girl cos you've been thinking about it.

    I would genuinely advise you to find out whether she's a strict Muslim or liberal because a strict Muslim will never marry outside Islam. However, liberal Muslim may do but then comes the issue of family if their family is strict.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Depends on how religious you both are - are either of you willing to convert? Do either of you wear turban or hijab? Are your parents British-born? Parents born in the UK are more lenient and usually not as religious so I would say go for it. If you're obviously both very religious though, or if she wears a hijab, and no one is willing to convert, and if her parents are strict, then I would say avoid it. It would cause a lot of tensions in both families so you just need to make your own judgement really on how both parents will react.
    I'm not that religious to be honest. I mean, I cut my hair, eat Halal meat(it's delicious), drink alcohol and participate in (non-penetrative) sexual activity with whom I not married to.

    I doubt either of us will be willing to convert. I am open to it, but only if I am convinced that Islam is the truth, in which I will have to do more research into.
    My parents are British born, but I don't think hers are.

    I don't wear a turban, but she wears the hijab.

    Tensions? What tensions are you on about? Please be more specific with examples.

    And my parents have no objections I know, and are quite happy about the situation. I am not sure about her parents though.
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    (Original post by ArbinderSingh98)
    If i was in love then yh but my family would hate me deeply
    Its the same with many Muslim families but mainly when it comes to Muslim females. I've seen some Muslim families who are chilled about it when their son marry outside Islam but when it comes to their daughters, that's another story.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm not that religious to be honest. I mean, I cut my hair, eat Halal meat(it's delicious), drink alcohol and participate in (non-penetrative) sexual activity with whom I not married to.

    I doubt either of us will be willing to convert. I am open to it, but only if I am convinced that Islam is the truth, in which I will have to do more research into.
    My parents are British born, but I don't think hers are.

    I don't wear a turban, but she wears the hijab.

    Tensions? What tensions are you on about? Please be more specific with examples.

    And my parents have no objections I know, and are quite happy about the situation. I am not sure about her parents though.
    If you aren't religious, why do you care if it is or isn't okay to do so according to sikh principles. You don't follow sikh teachings anyway, so what difference will this make? lmao

    Just another dumb ass individual trying to get attention. Get a life ffs
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I have never read that for myself in the Guru Granth Sahib.
    There are many other scriptures in the sikh religion, which are regarded with utmost respective and contain sikh teachings. Guru Granth Sahib is the highest, and contains a general teaching for the whole world. More specific teachings can be found on other texts. This particular Rehatnama, translating to a way of life to abide by, was written by a disciple of Guru Gobind Singh, under the instruction of Guru Gobind Singh themselves.
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    (Original post by TheALevelStudent)
    If you aren't religious, why do you care if it is or isn't okay to do so according to sikh principles. You don't follow sikh teachings anyway, so what difference will this make? lmao

    Just another dumb ass individual trying to get attention. Get a life ffs
    Well I try to be religious sometimes. I am just very busy with other things at the moment. Mainly my studies.

    And I'm just interested in what other Sikhs would think about this issue. I do not speak to many Sikhs so I'm just curious.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm not that religious to be honest. I mean, I cut my hair, eat Halal meat(it's delicious), drink alcohol and participate in (non-penetrative) sexual activity with whom I not married to.

    I doubt either of us will be willing to convert. I am open to it, but only if I am convinced that Islam is the truth, in which I will have to do more research into.
    My parents are British born, but I don't think hers are.

    I don't wear a turban, but she wears the hijab.

    Tensions? What tensions are you on about? Please be more specific with examples.

    And my parents have no objections I know, and are quite happy about the situation. I am not sure about her parents though.
    Like I said, British born parents are usually more relaxed, and that's why your parents don't seem to have a problem with it. If her parents weren't born here, then they're probably more strict. Also, do her parents want her to have an arranged marriage or are they happy for her to find someone on her own?

    By tensions I mean that if a Sikh boy was to turn up to a strict Muslim girl's household with a marriage proposal, this is probably the first her parents would be hearing about it, and if it wasn't to work out then they would blame her/ask her why she's been mixing with a Sikh guy etc and overall it would just be very awkward for her at home after all of this. This is all assuming that you're both early 20s / still living with parents.

    Why exactly are you in a relationship with a hijabi girl anyway? The point of the hijab is to show modesty and to stop men from looking at you. She's probably not that religious herself if she's going out with you. If you do end up getting married to a hijabi then I think most people would conclude for themselves that you were boyfriend-girlfriend for a while outside of marriage and that's something a lot of traditional parents (her parents maybe?) like to avoid so that other people don't gossip about the family etc.
 
 
 
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