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My friend is dating a 52 year old guy. What should I do? watch

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  • View Poll Results: Should I tell her parents?
    Yes, she will than you for it.
    78
    63.41%
    No, don't breach her trust.
    45
    36.59%

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    Tell her parents OP.
    Provided this guy isn't mentally challenged ,there's nothing they can be friends about-he's an old geezer,she's technically still a teenager...i think its fairly obvious what he's truly after,and it isn't the pleasure to confirm your friend's impressions of herself as "erhmagerd. like totes mature duh".
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    I think you should start off telling her sisters/brothers about it first; they seem more approachable.
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    I've just sent the message to her sister (23 year old) through FB.
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    It's a bit unconventional but you should do nothing unless you have real concerns.

    (Original post by Arvin Bhambra)
    Aye, remember that age is just a number. As long as they love each other it don't matter
    Age is a word actually.
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    (Original post by Kylie Jenner)
    I forgot to say that he is not even wealthy.
    Say's you Kylie! You just broke up with Tyga now you're supposedly going out with PartyNextDoor? Stop being a hypocrite!
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    if that was my daughter they would be kicked out of the premises and disowned
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    She is entitled to make her own decisions. Tell her your honest opinion, but if it were me and you did anything beyond that we would not be friends afterwards.
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    I really don't get this.

    We are living in an ever more progressive society, helping people embrace whatever (legal) life they wish to live. Want to marry someone of your own gender? Finally you have the right to do that. Feel like you were born the wrong gender? No problem, we will support you.

    A legally consenting adult wants to have a relationship with someone much older?

    Let's stage an intervention.
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    (Original post by Kylie Jenner)
    My good friend confessed to me that she's dating an 'older man' and at first I was supportive but when she told me just how much older he was I shuddered. I don't know what to do. Why would she do this to herself? She's 19 and her life is just beginning why would she do this? She is a confident person and always happy in herself and takes pride in herself as well. So I was completely shocked to learn this.


    I know her family, her sisters/brothers. Should I tell them?

    I added a poll please vote.
    I think you should meet him first, and see what he's like. He might be a really lovely person.

    If you get any bad feelings then it's up to you if you want to tell
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    Personally I don't know where I stand. Yes age is a number, and I am getting serious Friends flashbacks as I think of Monica crying over Richard.

    On the other hand, it seems creepy af to me, presumably because this is something I don't encounter regularly.

    All I will say is this: talk to your friend about speaking to her family. THIS IS NOT AN INTERVENTION. If she is sooo serious then she would talk about her relationship with them anyway, regardless of his age. Treat this the same way. They deserve to know about their daughter's/sister's personal life if the couple are that serious.
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    (Original post by beautifulbigmacs)
    It's not unusual for women to date men quite a bit older than themselves on the basis that it takes the male gender so long to grow the eff up and be decent boyfriend material.
    Read the OP again.
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    if this guy was half decent and had any sense of responsibility he wouldn't be fooling around with a 19 year old girl, especially bearing in mind that she's around his daughters' ages (wouldn't that weigh on him as a parent?)

    But there's a genuine possibility that they're both on the same level despite the age difference and actually like each other (some people don't grow up, they just grow old); those kinds of pairings are unusual but do sometimes happen (they're just not socially acceptable anymore).

    Also it may not last because whilst they might have fun together it could be impractical in the long term (can you imagine them still together in 10 year's time? She'd have to tell all her family first..)

    Then again I don't know what kind of person she is- it's possible that they really are serious, and it helps to be open minded about the diversity of human relationships. Who's to say (apart from society but they may be wrong) that you can only love someone within a certain age range?

    Having attempted an objective stance towards their relationship I admit it's harder when it's your friend that you're close to and that you may think of being similar to you- maybe you thought she'd never be that kind of person.
    I'd also find the 43 year age gap quite daunting, but anything's possible. There's also the yuck factor, and the whole taboo of daddy issues surrounding their relationship (which is not exactly normal.)
    They're probably not doing anything wrong, especially if she's confident like you say and able to stand up for herself, and they have been dating for a while. Keep in mind that she's a consenting adult and no longer a child so it's her responsibility and her choice. Talk to your other friends about it and your siblings, and get more opinions. If you really are worried that it's unhealthy you should approach one of her siblings first, the one that she's closest to, rather than her parents. Good luck, I hope that everything works out for you and your friend.
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    (Original post by Kylie Jenner)
    I've just sent the message to her sister (23 year old) through FB.
    OMG keep us posted! *grabs popcorn*


    :teehee:
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    This is a sick relationship, but some people like eating poo...

    Sickness is not illegal.
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    We all know what the old creep is after.
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    (Original post by Evangelion)
    We all know what the old creep is after.
    Are you trying to imply he went into a relationship with someone and wants sex?!

    How appalling.
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    (Original post by Josb)
    This is a sick relationship, but some people like eating poo...

    Sickness is not illegal.
    Two consensting adults with a huge age gap is the equivalent of someone eating crap?
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    if you have even the slightest of doubts that she's being groomed you may want to let her parents know.. update us on how things go goodluck hope its all okay? xoxo
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    (Original post by Joel 96)
    Two consensting adults with a huge age gap is the equivalent of someone eating crap?
    No, I used this example to show that there are worse situations.
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    (Original post by Kylie Jenner)
    I'm concerned for her, I hope she can see that. Is he taking advantage of her? What is she doing at his when she spends the night? Is it a healthy relationship? All questions I wanted to ask but couldn't because I didn't want to hurt her. But these are legitimate questions that I'm sure her mother wants to know the answer.
    Who are you? She's an adult. She probably knows your disapproval and doesnt need it. She can make her own mistakes. Mind your own business, unless you know there is soemthing seriously awry.
 
 
 
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