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Sick of being a muslim woman Watch

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    • #1
    #1

    (Original post by garlicbread23)
    Islam is a beautiful and peaceful religion. Those who state that they dislike Islam on this thread are uninformed and do not fully understand what Islam promotes, peace and purpose. OP i please recommended reading the Quran with an English translation and youll see the true power of islam as opposed to the war and terror associated links people have especially on this thread. They have been indoctrinated with what the media feeds them. Life is a test and this is one of the challenges that has been inflicted on you, please do not find the wrong way out and leave islam.
    Please don't patronise me. I haven't based my decision according to what people post on this forum. I have read the quran alongside its english translation several times and every time I read it, I find another discrepancy. I didn't make this thread to cause a religious debate. I have made my mind up and now I'm searching for a way out of this stifling environment.
    • #1
    #1

    (Original post by yungaheartz)
    can't you do that thing where you take the hijab off when you're just about to reach uni? i know girls who used to do that in school.
    Nope, the uni isn't far out enough plus a lot of people from seconday school/college attend that uni and word spreads fast in asian communities if I were to whip my scarf off..

    (Original post by Rohan187)
    If you've lost faith in the religion and have made up your mind about leaving it, then I would say go ahead however since you've stated something about the community you live in, it's kind of difficult. I'm guessing your parents aren't the open-minded type. eeh, if you fear it would cause a lot of hate, keep it to yourself, you could make subtle changes like not wearing the headscarf. You're parents/neighbours/friends aren't the type to stab you in your sleep for apostasy are they?
    Lol the funny thing is my mum is totally fine with me taking my scarf off in another city. When I visited Cardiff recently, I was moaning about my scarf and she said take it off when you get on the train. But when it comes to my home city and the area we live in, its a big no no..she cares way too much about what people would say if they caught me walking down the street without wearing one plus I feel as if my friends would lowkey judge me too :/
    • #4
    #4

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I am a 19 year old muslim female. On the surface, I appear to be the ideal muslim e.g. I wear the hijab, my clothes aren't very fitted (although I do wear skinny jeans- all my tops have to go past my bum). But I'm sick of it. After researching Islam, I don't identify with any of it. I genuinely believe religion is bs.

    The thing is, I live in an area which is full of judgemental muslims and my mum would die of shame if I was to take my scarf off and start dressing how I want to (my father died when I was young so she wants her daughters to be seen as respectable as opposed to 'loose'. This year, I gained a place at manchester uni and I saw this as my way out, I thought going to uni away from home would allow me to dress and live how I wanted to. However, I missed the grades for manchester and had to settle for a uni closer to home so now I'm going to be living at home for uni.

    So my dilemma is :should I just stick it out for 3 years and move away when I have a job or should I work hard at uni and transfer to a different uni for second year (but I fear being lonely cause everyone will know each other from first year)..whenever I stay over with my friends at their unis, I just love the freedom available to me and all I want is to live my life the way I want to live it rather than adhering to the rules of a religion which I do not identify with
    I don't support Islam, either. But I would say to wait it out for 3 years, because I know some Muslims can be exceptionally dangerous to "apostates".
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    (Original post by lawyer3c)
    If she thought her community were supportive she wouldn't be having this issue in the first place... You clearly know little about certain muslim/asian communities.
    Does it provide her with shelter and food?
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    (Original post by 04mr17)
    op, add pursuitofjannah to your ignore list. I will be doing so shortly. If this user or any of their racist friends continue posting in this thread, don't bother arguing with them, leave that to the rest of us (we are hungry).
    Spoiler:
    Show
    i will be off tsr tomorrow due to gcse traffic. I'll get back to you on friday. You have had some great advice and some rubbish. Try to keep calm during this difficult time.
    your comments neither help op or yourself, or in fact anyone else reading them. They are not spelt correctly, or come close to standard english - which in my view puts you below the intelligent 'crackers' of this world. Also, your usage of tsr indicates your seduction into the free and easy western society. The white british are not necessarily atheist and this view implies your clear prejudice. Would a government be more of a cause to all of these problems than atheism? (i think so). In what way does op express any interest in football? Not only do you display a complete and utter incompetence when it comes to appreciation of british culture, but your naiveté in assuming that op or anyone else will actually respect your opinion is also deeply amusing. if we all followed the path of our ancestors, then we would all be extremely hairy, swinging in the trees and engaging in intercourse with anything that moved. How does that fit in with your superior religion? we all have the same ancestors, we are all related to each other. That is a scientifically proven fact. Denial of such a fact is pure insanity. The quran is not a complete package, it is a religious scripture and it does not come wrapped from the royal mail (usually). The fact that you assume anyone who isn't muslim isn't human make you racist. Good day.
    wow agreed!
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    (Original post by inhuman)
    Does it provide her with shelter and food?
    Slave owners provided slaves with shelter and food, or else they'd die. Your point?

    NB. Her family ≠ her community.
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    (Original post by Mikaela!)
    Hi, i definitely think you should think about why you would like to leave islam, and think about why you feel constrained to this thing called religion.
    It's because religion is like a prison, there is no freedom in it.
    Think about freedom, freedom that is available to all. I found that freedom in Jesus Christ my saviour xx
    https://media.giphy.com/media/l14qxlCgJ0zUk/giphy.gif
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    (Original post by lawyer3c)
    Slave owners provided slaves with shelter and food, or else they'd die. Your point?

    NB. Her family ≠ her community.
    Her family is part of her community...

    And my point is, what would happen if she just left. Would she live on the street and steal for food? She could stay at a shelter, I am sure there are ones for this particular, or at a women's shelter or something, but she must research this first. Just up and leaving is not a clever idea.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    If only it were that easy, the community I live in is toxic...I need to escape it
    Hvae you considerd going througth Clering or Just moving out to halls anyway?
    saying that you will have SOO much work to do and commuting would cut in to yoyour study time (totaly true by the way). you need to be nere the libery so you can getan extra book out if fyou suddenluy need it the day befor a assigement is due
    to cross refrence somthing.

    in realty wile all this is true it is your chance to be you after 3 yers of uni you can
    out yourself to your Mum. I would do it over the phone or E-mail you don't want to give her to opertunaty to bring you back to such a toxic atomospher keep her in your life through letters or E-mail one day she may except that you don't agree with he religon and may exept you as you.

    or you could take a yere out in Austrila or somthing and re apply to other unis next year Reading is nice so is
    Southamton.

    good luck.
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    (Original post by PursuitOfJannah)
    I think they come here mostly cos of the English language, a few benefits and cos of the anglo american foreign policy i.e. starting wholly unnecessary wars in places like Iraq under the supposed guise of freedom and democracy. There is absolutely nothing remarkable about non London UK. Dubai is **** hot right now.
    Dubai does corruption and black market money like the most greedy western capitalist could only dream of.
    (Original post by PursuitOfJannah)
    Follow the path of your ancestors, .


    if she does that, then she would be islamic at all ,seeing as her original ancestors were most likely converted at some point by some invading islamic force to asia or africa.


    people flock to the west because its proven to be the most successful, progressive advanced and educated since the industrial revolution. the biggest migrations to West are muslims fleeing the islamic world. no suggestion it is perfect and hasnt been going back to its imperialistic roots, but its the best system human race has come up with in last 10,000 years.
    In terms of islamic culture, its shown nothing to anyone that it is superior to anyone, not the west, not even communist east. despite conquering billions of people in its own imperialistic heydey, all its offerred the world is 1400 years of sectarian war and nowadays backward thinking intolerance and terrorism. its only muslims that buy the suggestion that mohammed was a great role model- noone else does. if it were fact, we'd all be copying mohammed, not copying the 'football watching, money making, infrastructure building, education seeking, globally trading western society that the entire globe models its cities on- including the islamic world
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My mum would pass out if she knew I had touched a drop of alcohol. Also if I was to take my scarf off, I'm not strong enough to deal with the community or the muslim friends that I've grown up with. Thats why I was so depressed when I missed my manchester offer cause I felt that it would have provided me with the opportunity to live how I wanted and then come back and play along for my mums sake (cause she cares A LOT about what people think of her)
    Maybe if this community is making you unhappy, you need to find a way to remove yourself from it, or at least find a way to cope or compromise with it. At some point, you might find a way for you to gain independence, maybe through a job, or a home elsewhere, and at that point you can either come back and 'play along' (which again, I wouldn't advise, but I don't know for sure what would work best for you, obviously) or let those in that community know that you live your own life a different way to how you grew up.
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    (Original post by inhuman)
    Her family is part of her community...
    Wtf is this notion of a 'community' and how is it relevant in the slightest? Her family give her food/shelter, not her 'community' (whatever the **** that means).
    And my point is, what would happen if she just left. Would she live on the street and steal for food? She could stay at a shelter, I am sure there are ones for this particular, or at a women's shelter or something, but she must research this first. Just up and leaving is not a clever idea.
    I never said she should just leave.
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    (Original post by lawyer3c)
    Wtf is this notion of a 'community' and how is it relevant in the slightest? Her family give her food/shelter, not her 'community' (whatever the **** that means).

    I never said she should just leave.
    Just because you don't see its meaning, means my entire argument is wrong?

    And well then we are agreed. What's the problem?
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    (Original post by inhuman)
    Just because you don't see its meaning, means my entire argument is wrong?

    And well then we are agreed. What's the problem?
    Please tell me how her "community" (query: what is a community in this context) is relevant to her decision-making?

    The same people who talk about the importance of one's 'community' are the people most likely to talk about family 'honour' etc. These are typically not people who actually give a **** about her wellbeing or happiness.
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    Maybe get a room over the Christmas holidays? I think you can find a room but it'll be tough. At least you'd get to move out though and you can leave Islam if that's what you really want to do. Out of curiosity, do you go to Queen Mary? I'm asking because you said your uni has a lot of Asians so I'm guessing

    Good luck OP! You seem like a nice person
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    (Original post by lawyer3c)
    Please tell me how her "community" (query: what is a community in this context) is relevant to her decision-making?

    The same people who talk about the importance of one's 'community' are the people most likely to talk about family 'honour' etc. These are typically not people who actually give a **** about her wellbeing or happiness.
    The people in her immediate relationship circle.

    They might not all be family hence why I didn't use family but community.

    But I don't see why you are hijacking the thread arguing about the use/definition of one word, especially considering you and I actually agree.
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    (Original post by DownDan00)
    Tell your parents. If they love you (as almost all parents do) they will be shocked, but certainly not disown you. If they were to disown you, look at them and ask yourself 'do I want people like this to have control over my choices?.' I can guarantee that no matter how bad 'outing' yourself is, it will be immeasurably better than living a lie for the next three years. When it comes to religion, those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.
    You would surprised at how many put religion over their children (particularly in Islam although it happens in every religion). I know someone who was in a similar situation as OP (but she was gay and her family were Salafis). She was really close to her parents but when she came out, they kicked her out and disowned her.

    It's just really sad :/


    (Original post by garlicbread23)
    Islam is a beautiful and peaceful religion. Those who state that they dislike Islam on this thread are uninformed and do not fully understand what Islam promotes, peace and purpose. OP i please recommended reading the Quran with an English translation and youll see the true power of islam as opposed to the war and terror associated links people have especially on this thread. They have been indoctrinated with what the media feeds them. Life is a test and this is one of the challenges that has been inflicted on you, please do not find the wrong way out and leave islam.
    OP has said that she doesn't agree with Islam. Your post is completely irrelevant because you're going on about something she has no belief in.
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    (Original post by inhuman)
    The people in her immediate relationship circle.
    So her personal friends and family, then?
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    (Original post by lawyer3c)
    So her personal friends and family, then?
    Yes.
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    maybe resit and try to get the grades for next year? That's useless to go to a uni you dont want , you need to enjoy uni so you can study (at least its how ot works for me) . Or maybe try clearing
 
 
 
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