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What would your reaction be if your son came out as a transgender? watch

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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    If that makes you laugh, you're even more twisted than you first came across. Did you trigger me? Totally. This is disgusting. And I've been on the receiving end of the sort of *******s you're purporting and it hurts, it completely ****s things up and it does an awful lot of damage. As a father, if you want to inflict such pain on your children then you are simply not fit.
    What would you do if your son was a drug user?

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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    You shouldn't force that belief on your children - it's yours. Not theirs.
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    (Original post by dingleberry jam)
    What would you do if your son was a drug user?

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    I would help my son. I would never need to know if he was a drug user unless things went wrong. I couldn't care less if my son chose to have an experience a few times, or smoke a joint with his pals. It's not happening in my house, because it's illegal and I don't want smoking in my house, period. If it got to a point where he became an addict, I would love and help my son. I would't shun him at all. But at the same time, he'd have been a ****ing idiot for getting into it in the first place.
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    (Original post by SirKyrgystan)
    This is actually a toughy. I'm quite liberal when it comes to sexuality and what you identify as. I mean, I think it's ridiculous that some people identify as cats and wolves (damn furries ) but at the same time it's like 'if it makes you happy, you do you'.

    That said, there is a shockingly high attempted suicide rate for transgenders (~41% according to some studies). However, whether this is due to societal discrimination, or regret/unhealthy psyche to begin with, I have no clue. I guess I'd be worried, I mean If my son goes through with this lifestyle, he's opening himself up to bullying, trolling, ridicule, persecution and in some cases physical violence just for him being himself(herself?).

    I'd have quite a few long talks with my son, I'd listen, and understand where he is coming from, because nothing is worse as a child than your parents not understanding who you are, and forcing their views of who you should be on you. But (ready the pitchforks) I would try and dissuade him from the choice for a few years. Not actively forcing him into a 'manly' way of being, but encouraging him to find a middle ground where he is happy as his gender/in his own body, but also remains himself in personality and preferences.. if that makes any sense? Above all though, I'd be supportive of him and his decisions.

    There's a quote I like alot that answers why I'd be so supportive, to paraphrase it "when we try and be someone we are not, either we succeed and feel as we have lost ourselves, or we fail. Either way, we despair. (So be yourself)" Really not doing the quote justice :laugh:. Doesn't mean you can't try and improve, or try and fit into societal norms abit better. But above all you shouldn't change what fundamentally makes you, you, to achieve that, because you'll be more miserable if you do, than if you go against the grain of what society deems 'acceptable'.

    Ofc it's hard to give a real reaction when so much of the scenario is left to the imagination, like whether he wants gender-reassignment surgery or not, but the above is just how I'd react to the general situation at first.
    I basically 100% agree with this above quote. Couldn't have said it any better.
    BUT the bit in bold - that's called victim blaming. By saying what you said, you're basically indirectly pre-empting and condoning the bullying which is never okay regardless of who/what someone is.

    (Original post by ivybridge)
    Surgery is much more difficult the later you leave it because puberty has happened. You should let doctors assess the situation.
    Hmmm, I'm sorry I'm not gonna lie there is something bothering me about a young child going through surgery. Pre-pubescent kids just seem way too young to be sure about that kind of thing, no matter what the doctors say. But if I ever happened to be in that situation, that is the only time I'll ever know what I'd do, because maybe I'd be stressing over nothing
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    (Original post by supernerdural)
    okay I am not really up for a debate about the morality of religious teachings, but the foundation of religion is to love and accept people. You are going against this by rejecting your child. Also, do not thrust your views upon others. It is fine for you to be religious, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it, but let others - including your child - make up their own mind about these things and don't indoctrinate and brainwash them.
    Loving someone doesn't mean that you should accept every decision they make. The most loving thing to do is to guide them towards the right path. The most hateful thing I could do is to let my son/daughter continue in their sin while knowing that they will be condemned to eternal damnation if they carry on like this.
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    (Original post by Kyle1198)
    Hmmm, I'm sorry I'm not gonna lie there is something bothering me about a young child going through surgery. Pre-pubescent kids just seem way too young to be sure about that kind of thing, no matter what the doctors say. But if I ever happened to be in that situation, that is the only time I'll ever know what I'd do, because maybe I'd be stressing over nothing
    The best thing to do would be to let them speak to a doctor from 16 years. No younger, if that's how you feel. The process takes an awful long time and the child has control of their own healthcare at 16+.
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    I'm not saying being trans is just about wearing different clothes and using different pronouns and changing your hair, but if a young person is trans and dysphoric, you're literally killing them by refusing them simple changes such as different clothing. Claiming you want what's best for your kids whilst also denying their very self is ridiculous.

    And to the guy who was sarcastic about being blocked and called my example a nonsense example: I used fashion as an example because it's the first thing I thought of and I was in a rush. Although if we're talking science, there are tons of theories that have been disproved since the thirties. Einstein had breakthroughs with solid proof that we rely on now because they're correct - creepy 1930's man didn't have breakthroughs, he had theories. There's a huge difference.
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    (Original post by Trapz99)
    Loving someone doesn't mean that you should accept every decision they make. The most loving thing to do is to guide them towards the right path. The most hateful thing I could do is to let my son/daughter continue in their sin while knowing that they will be condemned to eternal damnation if they carry on like this.
    No, the most loving thing to do is accept that your child is their own rationally autonomous being and that your religious drivel is your own beliefs, not your child's. If they make legally acceptable, non-harmful, and informed choices, then you cannot as a parent, not accept them. You need to accept them and love the child, regardless of your own qualms with those choices.

    Makes me so mad even listening to you validate your points with religious nonsense. IT IS A BOOK CONSTRUCTED BY PRIESTS HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO TO MANIPULATE THE POPULATION INTO FOLLOWING WHAT THE CHURCH WANTED THEM TO FOLLOW, AND TO CONSOLIDATE POWER. STOP. YOU HAVE NO IDEA IF THIS FIGURE LIVES ON A CLOUD. IT IS YOUR BELIEF. IT IS NOT FACT. THERE'S BARELY ANY BACKING FOR ANY OF IT. LITERALLY JUST STOP.
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    (Original post by Mimir)
    You don't "come out" as a transgender. You 'come out' as transgendered.

    "Oh, he's a transgender..."? Nope.
    Ahh, no. It's not "a transgender," you're right there – but "transgendered" is also wrong. It’s an adjective, not a noun or a verb. And for anyone who didn't know, it isn't "transsexual" either. Transgender. An adjective.
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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    I would help my son. I would never need to know if he was a drug user unless things went wrong. I couldn't care less if my son chose to have an experience a few times, or smoke a joint with his pals. It's not happening in my house, because it's illegal and I don't want smoking in my house, period. If it got to a point where he became an addict, I would love and help my son. I would't shun him at all.
    But you'd still consider him to be a ****?

    (Original post by ivybridge)
    But at the same time, he'd have been a ****ing idiot for getting into it in the first place.
    Would you feel the same if it was alcohol, what if they had mental health issues or a bigoted father and used it as an escape?
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    I'd be supportive and take him out dress shopping
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    (Original post by Trapz99)
    Loving someone doesn't mean that you should accept every decision they make. The most loving thing to do is to guide them towards the right path. The most hateful thing I could do is to let my son/daughter continue in their sin while knowing that they will be condemned to eternal damnation if they carry on like this.
    But they know that they are truly meant to be a different gender, which means God made them that way, and arguably made this a trial to test them and you. By saying they are wrong, you are saying God's design was wrong, and saying you know more than Him
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    If thats his choice then I'd stand by it. It's her life at the end of the day, she has to live it, not me.
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    (Original post by dingleberry jam)
    But you'd still consider him to be a ****?



    Would you feel the same if it was alcohol, what if they had mental health issues or a bigoted father and used it as an escape?
    Yes, I would. I think it's unnecessary and a disgusting waste.

    If I was there father, I wouldn't be 'bigoted' but if they used it as an escape or had mental health issues, there'd be different things at work and I'd help and support them.

    I would be the same if it was alcohol.
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    (Original post by Raees_Sharif)
    you seem triggered.

    its similar because pedophilia is degenerate and transgender person having sex with a normal person is also considered degenerate by most of the general population.
    Can you please give statistics to prove that most of the general population think that?
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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    No, the most loving thing to do is accept that your child is their own rationally autonomous being and that your religious drivel is your own beliefs, not your child's. If they make legally acceptable, non-harmful, and informed choices, then you cannot as a parent, not accept them. You need to accept them and love the child, regardless of your own qualms with those choices.

    Makes me so mad even listening to you validate your points with religious nonsense. IT IS A BOOK CONSTRUCTED BY PRIESTS HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO TO MANIPULATE THE POPULATION INTO FOLLOWING WHAT THE CHURCH WANTED THEM TO FOLLOW, AND TO CONSOLIDATE POWER. STOP. YOU HAVE NO IDEA IF THIS FIGURE LIVES ON A CLOUD. IT IS YOUR BELIEF. IT IS NOT FACT. THERE'S BARELY ANY BACKING FOR ANY OF IT. LITERALLY JUST STOP.
    I don't need to accept their choices. I will obviously still keep them in my me- I'm not going to let them let live in the streets as that would be awful- but I will encourage them towards the truth, which is that God made them as a man/woman and that whatever they do is not going to change that fact- it is just going today them further and further from God. They can choose to reject that if they wish and follow in their life of sin but I could never accept that lifestyle as it goes against God's wishes and I will continue to help my child get on the path towards forgiveness and salvation.
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    (Original post by Ladbants)
    If you don't have a son, pretend that you do...

    I'd be fine as long as they were willing to speak to experts and be open minded to the idea it might be a phase. I wouldn't want them to screw up their body and then realise later that it wasn't what they wanted. If it is what they want and there's solid evidence, I would happily support.
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    (Original post by Raees_Sharif)
    a young kid wouldn't even know or care about what transgender is unless they're being brainwashed by the parents or the media
    I'm not trans but when I first heard of it I never thought of it in a negative way. I just thought of it as a boy wanting to be a girl vice versa. That's all it is. The fact that people go through such turbulence with hormone changes, shows how much they want it. I'm sure that if they could remain the gender they are they would in a heartbeat.
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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    Literally just listening to your bs makes me so angry. This world would be so much better off without religion. Toxic.
    Maybe it's making you angry because you know it's the truth. That's my take, anyway.
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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    Literally just listening to your bs makes me so angry. This world would be so much better off without religion. Toxic.
    Please don't think this person represents the entire world of faith (no pun intended)
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    (Original post by ivybridge)
    Yes, I would. I think it's unnecessary and a disgusting waste.

    If I was there father, I wouldn't be 'bigoted' but if they used it as an escape or had mental health issues, there'd be different things at work and I'd help and support them.

    I would be the same if it was alcohol.
    You'd consider your son to be a **** for what he chooses to put into his body, sounds bigoted to me.

    You never use alcohol? What kind of help and support? Encouraging them to stop? Why should they if they don't feel they have a problem?

    Drug use is seven times higher among gays, why do you think gays are so much more likely to be *****?
 
 
 
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