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Can we get 3115 posts by Halloween 2015? watch

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    I fear for the calendar, it's days are numbered.
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    Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
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    Velcro… What a rip-off.
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    I bought some shoes off a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day
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    Welcome Squad
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    I'm reading a book on the history of glue – can't put it down.
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    My mate's in a band called "1023 Megabytes"... They haven't got a gig yet
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    Two muffins were sitting in an oven, and the first looks over to the second, and says, "man, it's really hot in here". The second looks over at the first with a surprised look, and answers, "WHOA, a talking muffin!"
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    Broken pencils are pointless
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    BREAKING NEWS: Man cut off left hand. He's all right now
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    I was waiting for the sunrise. Then it dawned on me.
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    How can you tell a vampire likes baseball?
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    Every night he turns into a bat.
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    What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?

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    It's a pain in the neck
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    What is a vampires least favorite food?

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    Steak
 
 
 
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