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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Feel incredibly ****. Spent a lot of the day in bed again,the voices are so loud and aggressive, I don't understand how anythingI could have done would be bad enough for this as a punishment. I'm sure they've bugged my house and are watching and listening to me and my wife. We went out and there were mindreading spies watching pretty much everywhere, even my thoughts aren't safe anymore, I can deal with them watching me lie in bed all day (lucky them) but I can't deal with them knowing my thoughts all the time. I don't feel safe at all and I don't see any escape. Well.....I see one escape but it's not to be taken lightly.
    Hang in there Sabretooth. Evaluate what is happening. Analyse it and intellectualise it. You know its not real. Sorry, don't know if it's helping you. But it's what I've been doing for the last hour for myself to calm myself down from a similar 'predicament'. Can't think of anything else to say...except I'm thinking about you...hoping you can regain control...keep well dude...and safe...


    (Original post by asdfgah)
    ****. I dunno how to keep doing this. Just don't know what to do.
    What's up dude. Are you ok?
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    (Original post by los lobos marinos)
    What's up dude. Are you ok?
    There just isn't any point.. can't deal with flashbacks or even the thought of them. Don't want to think any more. want to get high or something but don't have anyone here who can help with that. Trying to numb my mind with tv isn't working anymore, and i'm ****ing smoking all the ****ing time and I can't stand the fact that i'm going to get addicted and it feels so out of my control. I can't deal with anything and it seems so **** of me but I just want to do something that everyone else would say is bad but I just cant really and I don't know what to do. I want to be ok but it's not working. I wanted to come back here and be as well as I was a couple of months ago but my mental health has slipped a ****load. want to just cancel therapy and stop everything. ptsd isn't even that bad at the moment in terms of flashbacks and dissociation but I just cant stop thinking about it and I want it out of my head.
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    (Original post by asdfgah)
    There just isn't any point.. can't deal with flashbacks or even the thought of them. Don't want to think any more. want to get high or something but don't have anyone here who can help with that. Trying to numb my mind with tv isn't working anymore, and i'm ****ing smoking all the ****ing time and I can't stand the fact that i'm going to get addicted and it feels so out of my control. I can't deal with anything and it seems so **** of me but I just want to do something that everyone else would say is bad but I just cant really and I don't know what to do. I want to be ok but it's not working. I wanted to come back here and be as well as I was a couple of months ago but my mental health has slipped a ****load. want to just cancel therapy and stop everything. ptsd isn't even that bad at the moment in terms of flashbacks and dissociation but I just cant stop thinking about it and I want it out of my head.
    :jumphug: Am around on Skype if you want to talk/want distracting chatter. :console:
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    (Original post by los lobos marinos)
    Hang in there Sabretooth. Evaluate what is happening. Analyse it and intellectualise it. You know its not real. Sorry, don't know if it's helping you. But it's what I've been doing for the last hour for myself to calm myself down from a similar 'predicament'. Can't think of anything else to say...except I'm thinking about you...hoping you can regain control...keep well dude...and safe...
    I'm trying man, I've spent most of the day just lying there thinking (and getting shouted at) and this seems like the most logical conclusion, it's the only one where all the pieces fit. I realize it sounds unusual but people on here don't know what I did to deserve this so I'm seeing why people assume I'm wrong.

    Wanna talk about your predicament? Sometimes talking can help.
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    I've just realised it was our 5th anniversary five days ago. Neither of us remembered. I feel really **** now because I'm panicking that my partner doesn't love me enough to remember such an important date, but also because I forgot too and that makes me a hypocritical *****. I really wanted to celebrate. Our celebrating involved him playing GTA, me consoling a screaming baby then going to bed at 10 and watching 1 and a half episodes of Castle before dozing off. He didn't even come to bed til gone 3. It's now 12:42 and he's asleep and Scott's crying and I really want to talk to him about it but he has work tomorrow. So ****ing upset right now.
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    (Original post by HmMusic)
    I've just realised it was our 5th anniversary five days ago. Neither of us remembered. I feel really **** now because I'm panicking that my partner doesn't love me enough to remember such an important date, but also because I forgot too and that makes me a hypocritical *****. I really wanted to celebrate. Our celebrating involved him playing GTA, me consoling a screaming baby then going to bed at 10 and watching 1 and a half episodes of Castle before dozing off. He didn't even come to bed til gone 3. It's now 12:42 and he's asleep and Scott's crying and I really want to talk to him about it but he has work tomorrow. So ****ing upset right now.
    Talk to your partner about it. It is most likely that you both just forgot as you have a lot going on with the baby right now, but why not see if you can't set aside a day or night to do something special in a week or two?
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    I'm trying man, I've spent most of the day just lying there thinking (and getting shouted at) and this seems like the most logical conclusion, it's the only one where all the pieces fit. I realize it sounds unusual but people on here don't know what I did to deserve this so I'm seeing why people assume I'm wrong.

    Wanna talk about your predicament? Sometimes talking can help.
    I'm pretty sure that you did absolutely nothing to deserve anything like that. The likelihood as that you are just an ordinary man, who fell in love, got married and settled down. Doing his very best to succeed in every conceivable way. Someone who deserves to be happy.


    I can't really talk about my problem as my tutor, with whom I have group tutorial tomorrow, is somehow involved. Involved in something that doesn't even exist!! I should know better than to listen to their non-stop lies. The only time the noise is guaranteed to stop is when I'm doing scuba as I'm in a constant state of wonderment. I aspire to be the Man From Atlantis I might stick that in as the last line in my resume/CV when I go job-hunting.
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    (Original post by asdfgah)
    There just isn't any point.. can't deal with flashbacks or even the thought of them. Don't want to think any more. want to get high or something but don't have anyone here who can help with that. Trying to numb my mind with tv isn't working anymore, and i'm ****ing smoking all the ****ing time and I can't stand the fact that i'm going to get addicted and it feels so out of my control. I can't deal with anything and it seems so **** of me but I just want to do something that everyone else would say is bad but I just cant really and I don't know what to do. I want to be ok but it's not working. I wanted to come back here and be as well as I was a couple of months ago but my mental health has slipped a ****load. want to just cancel therapy and stop everything. ptsd isn't even that bad at the moment in terms of flashbacks and dissociation but I just cant stop thinking about it and I want it out of my head.
    Firstly, I want to apologise for referring to you as a dude when you are clearly a lady of the female persuasion. Apologies again dudette ma'am.

    This may not help you with how you are feeling at this precise moment, but I do want you to know that therapy really can work. It can just take a little while to work things out. I actually know a lady who also had ptsd as a result of...well that does not matter. But she did recover, is so happy and is leading such a rich and full life. Please don't give up. Just keep plugging away and you too can reach for the stars. All your dreams and ambitions are all still within your grasp.
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    (Original post by los lobos marinos)
    Dude, it's definitely not drivel, It is your reality and it's how you feel. I also tend to only ever find friends in other people with mental health or other significant problems. Maybe there is some sort of hidden magnetic pull or something?

    With the CV, you know that if you manage make to a start on it things may start to flow and before you know it, you'll have a polished finished article and quality covering letter. I'm sure there must be loads of good things you can put down if you put your mind to it! It's just getting around to starting the whole thing - You can do it! There should be a procrastination thread on TSR, it's probably been thought about by various members, but no-one actually managed to motivate themselves to start it...That should be the definition in the dictionary lol

    If it's any bonus, I'm actually a touch envious of how tidy and organised you are right now. I'm only cleaning myself and clothes so that I don't smell and offend other students. Having to battle all the flies hanging around my pathetic cesspit of a flat.

    On a lighter note, I got into an argument with an invisible person while standing on my balcony smoking a cigarette today. I was using hand gestures, body language and everything during the dialogue. People below on the street thought I was nuts. I hate my mind sometimes. But I shall learn to cherish it. It shall be my friend.
    Yeah, I suppose that's true, although I do seem to be finding myself moaning on here all the time :erm:

    Turned out that we didn't quite need to do much on it, just make a start and finish the rest during tutorial . And yeah, lack of concentration is a major problem for me since I started suffering from this depression.

    I wouldn't consider my room to be that tidy! Loads of bits all over the place and stuff. But yeah, I guess things could be worse, I know I've been much worse when I've been feeling really low. Hope you manage to sort out your flat at some point

    Don't worry about invisible people, I've had invisible friends since I was 6 :ninja:

    How are you doing now?

    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Managing to do your laundry sounds good, don't worry about putting it away it's unimportant. I used to put all my clean stuff on my bed and sleep under it - they never had the heating on.

    You should try to find the energy to organize/go bowling or clubbing, even if it's difficult, I'd say that;s actually way more important than putting away clothes. I spent my university years alone and it was awful, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Make your number one priority at the moment making friends - join societies, sit by people in classes, cook time-intensive stuff to make sure you're in the kitchen more etc. Good luck.
    I did put it away last night! Not having the heating sounds horrible, don't know how managed it :console:

    Yeah, I should. I know what it feels like to be alone, this was the most important change I was hoping for once I started uni but things don't seem to have gone my way so far. I'm kinda stuck about how to go about it, I was thinking about starting a group Facebook conversation but I'm not sure if that is a good idea. I have managed to get to know 3 people from my class so that is a good thing, shame none of them live on campus (in fact very few people from my class live on campus). I was around some flatmates earlier too.

    How are you feeling today?




    I'm awake at this stupid time because I had a nap after I finished my classes so therefore I can't sleep at this time. The day wasn't particularly bad I'd say.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Keep working with the crisis team, they're there to help you. Have you told anyone else how bad you're feeling? Maybe a friend/parent/family member. I know you worry about people abandoning you but you're ill and people will want to help you not leave you if you tell them. And extra support is always useful. I hope you feel better soon. :hugs:
    Yeah, I'm gonna keep with the crisis team, they seem not too bad in this area so I'm gonna give them a shot anyway. I told my friend from uni and she's been lovely about it and has helped me just by letting me rant to her. My girlfriend knows but she has her own **** at the moment so its hard for her to be there. Yeah. I just get worried about burdening people, but I felt like my friend was really understanding and didn't felt burdened. Thanks, how are you at the moment?


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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    I'm trying man, I've spent most of the day just lying there thinking (and getting shouted at) and this seems like the most logical conclusion, it's the only one where all the pieces fit. I realize it sounds unusual but people on here don't know what I did to deserve this so I'm seeing why people assume I'm wrong.
    No it doesn't and no you don't deserve it and you know it is not logic, that you are treated exceptionally in comparison to others. Keep on trying! Maybe think back to similar events?

    :holmes::hugs:

    PS.: Okay, it was 11 hours ago. I was too fast.
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    (Original post by tasha96)
    All the best people get lost. :yep:
    This is SO true :yep:
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    As soon as university comes near, I fear to be taken apart by fear and "procastrination"/avoidance. Has anyone suggestions, how to organise my work to get at a high level without loosing myself? Not that I am totally clueless, but sometimes it is good, to hear other opinions as a second net to fall into.
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    (Original post by Nathanielle)
    As soon as university comes near, I fear to be taken apart by fear and "procastrination"/avoidance. Has anyone suggestions, how to organise my work to get at a high level without loosing myself? Not that I am totally clueless, but sometimes it is good, to hear other opinions as a second net to fall into.
    Get a mini white board and write deadlines on it! Or to do lists so you can physically wipe them off when youv completed it and you can see what your actually getting done!


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    (Original post by Nathanielle)
    As soon as university comes near, I fear to be taken apart by fear and "procastrination"/avoidance. Has anyone suggestions, how to organise my work to get at a high level without loosing myself? Not that I am totally clueless, but sometimes it is good, to hear other opinions as a second net to fall into.

    (Original post by PonchoKid)
    Get a mini white board and write deadlines on it! Or to do lists so you can physically wipe them off when youv completed it and you can see what your actually getting done!


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Just to add to this, these are really good for student rooms. They just stick to the wall with static, so can't leave marks or anything and don't need you to invent some complicated hanging system to get it up (I don't have nails or anything in my wall, and can't use blue tack or pins, so a normal whiteboard would be hard). They actually gave me some of these (several sheets of mini magic blackboard, and pens) through disabled students' allowance (it was the assessor's suggestion; I'd never heard of them) and they're really helpful.
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    https://www.change.org/en-GB/petitio...e=action_alert

    please sign if you have the time
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    (Original post by asdfgah)
    Just to add to this, these are really good for student rooms. They just stick to the wall with static, so can't leave marks or anything and don't need you to invent some complicated hanging system to get it up (I don't have nails or anything in my wall, and can't use blue tack or pins, so a normal whiteboard would be hard). They actually gave me some of these (several sheets of mini magic blackboard, and pens) through disabled students' allowance (it was the assessor's suggestion; I'd never heard of them) and they're really helpful.
    i just managed to balance my white board on a radiator or my desk instead of hanging it on the wall, but in third year there was already hanging thingy majiggys in the wall so i used them
    but iv heard about those things! its deffinately a good idea
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    (Original post by SciFiRory)
    https://www.change.org/en-GB/petitio...e=action_alert

    please sign if you have the time
    asdfgah and I have signed it. Bloody ****wits at these tabloids :mad:
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    (Original post by PonchoKid)
    thingy majiggys
    :laugh:

    How are you today? :hugs:

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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    asdfgah and I have signed it. Bloody ****wits at these tabloids :mad:
    it came up on my emails so i signed it and got rory to sign it, then thought we might aswell put it on here as well spread the word about the scum!
 
 
 
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