Depression Society MkII Watch

This discussion is closed.
*pink_sapphires*
Badges: 1
Rep:
?
#8441
Report 9 years ago
#8441
Sian, I'm not allowed to take ANYTHING with me into the shop and our clothes don't have pockets so we can't sneak things in I print off till roll and doodle on that normally but not all the shops even have pens in! It's a nightmare and I hate working there. How are you?

xxkaylsxx, thanks for your idea. i might do that tomorrow! how are you?
0
becki08
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#8442
Report 9 years ago
#8442
Thanks jonathon :hugs:

death.drop, is there another abuse therapist that you can see? :hugs:

Liz, I really hope it's not CFS you've got :hugs: good luck with your tests.

I'm having a major panic. I got a missed call this evening and did a search on the phone number to discover it was the local mental health hospital. Please say they're not going to make me go in again! I'm scared. Really not feeling too good tonight. Might give the samaritans a ring in the minute.
0
death.drop
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#8443
Report 9 years ago
#8443
(Original post by becki08)
death.drop, is there another abuse therapist that you can see? :hugs:
nope. small town so there's only one abuse specialist.

did you phone the samaritans in the end? The hospital were probably just phoning to organise a check up or something. I'm sure they wouldn't ask you to go back in without good grounds.
0
becki08
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#8444
Report 9 years ago
#8444
(Original post by death.drop)
nope. small town so there's only one abuse specialist.

did you phone the samaritans in the end? The hospital were probably just phoning to organise a check up or something. I'm sure they wouldn't ask you to go back in without good grounds.
I've never been to that hospital before but my doctor made an emergency referral to the CMHT today as she considered me a 'high suicide risk' so it panicked me when they phoned. Hopefully they were just checking up on me rather than wanting to assess me or anything.

Yeah I did phone the samaritans. It helped me calm down a bit although I'm still really not feeling too good. Wonder whether I'll get any sleep tonight.

That's really annoying about the counselling. Would they be able to work with you after they've finished with your abuser? If not maybe you could get some normal counselling or therapy as that might help at least a bit.
0
jonathan122
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#8445
Report 9 years ago
#8445
(Original post by becki08)
I've never been to that hospital before but my doctor made an emergency referral to the CMHT today as she considered me a 'high suicide risk' so it panicked me when they phoned. Hopefully they were just checking up on me rather than wanting to assess me or anything.

Yeah I did phone the samaritans. It helped me calm down a bit although I'm still really not feeling too good. Wonder whether I'll get any sleep tonight.

That's really annoying about the counselling. Would they be able to work with you after they've finished with your abuser? If not maybe you could get some normal counselling or therapy as that might help at least a bit.
:hugs:
0
xxkaylsxx
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#8446
Report 9 years ago
#8446
(Original post by *pink_sapphires*)

xxkaylsxx, thanks for your idea. i might do that tomorrow! how are you?
Not brilliant at the moment but im dealing with it.
Thankyou for asking

Hope you found a way to combat our boredom at work today.
0
Sabertooth
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#8447
Report 9 years ago
#8447
Feeling ****ing awful today. Haven't slept properly in over a week, been to see some psychiatrist and got given yet more drugs, I honestly hate taking them, I still can't sleep and the voices are just as bad. Seeing my psychiatrist next week so maybe she'll give me something to help, probably not though, I feel like I'll be like this forever, what's the point anymore? It's gone on so long and nothing's helping I'm just getting worse.
0
Nothos
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#8448
Report 9 years ago
#8448
I think I'm actually losing my mind...I've started hearing voices, I kept asking my mum if she was saying something, sounds like people are whispering, but I can't really make out what they're saying and I keep having brief spells where I sort of...don't have control of myself, some sort of weird autopilot, and I can't really remember what I did during them...

Couple this with the usual problems of feeling like crap (which seems to be getting worse too) and the fact that I keep jumping at little things for not apparent reason...

I've just noticed my hand is shaking really badly. God, what's wrong with me? I'm terrified....
0
xxkaylsxx
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#8449
Report 9 years ago
#8449
sorry to hear you are feeling worse Sabertooth and the psycatrist isnt really helping. Is there nothing you can do to help you feel a little better in the meantime such as talking a walk? i find that tends to help, especially when its windy because its like it blows everything away.
not really good at the advice im afraid so have i will give you a hug instead :hugs:
0
Sabertooth
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#8450
Report 9 years ago
#8450
(Original post by BruceTaylor)
I think I'm actually losing my mind...I've started hearing voices, I kept asking my mum if she was saying something, sounds like people are whispering, but I can't really make out what they're saying and I keep having brief spells where I sort of...don't have control of myself, some sort of weird autopilot, and I can't really remember what I did during them...

Couple this with the usual problems of feeling like crap (which seems to be getting worse too) and the fact that I keep jumping at little things for not apparent reason...

I've just noticed my hand is shaking really badly. God, what's wrong with me? I'm terrified....
:hugs: I think you really need to talk to your doctor about this. That's how it started for me just whispering and thinking people had said something.

(Original post by xxkaylsxx)
sorry to hear you are feeling worse Sabertooth and the psycatrist isnt really helping. Is there nothing you can do to help you feel a little better in the meantime such as talking a walk? i find that tends to help, especially when its windy because its like it blows everything away.
not really good at the advice im afraid so have i will give you a hug instead :hug:
I will when my mum gets home from work, I don't trust myself to atm. :o: I know what you mean about the wind, it's really refreshing.
0
Antimatter
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#8451
Report 9 years ago
#8451
(Original post by BruceTaylor)
I think I'm actually losing my mind...I've started hearing voices, I kept asking my mum if she was saying something, sounds like people are whispering, but I can't really make out what they're saying and I keep having brief spells where I sort of...don't have control of myself, some sort of weird autopilot, and I can't really remember what I did during them...

Couple this with the usual problems of feeling like crap (which seems to be getting worse too) and the fact that I keep jumping at little things for not apparent reason...

I've just noticed my hand is shaking really badly. God, what's wrong with me? I'm terrified....
And you say Im weird for hearing voices!
Also, get more sleep, and take the bloody meds alredy!
Also, also, we all love you, Hugs!
xx
0
Nothos
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#8452
Report 9 years ago
#8452
(Original post by Sabertooth)
:hugs: I think you really need to talk to your doctor about this. That's how it started for me just whispering and thinking people had said something.
I'm too scared, I know that's terrible, but I just can't face it :cry:
0
Sabertooth
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#8453
Report 9 years ago
#8453
(Original post by BruceTaylor)
I'm too scared, I know that's terrible, but I just can't face it :cry:
:hugs: I know it's really scary but if you don't tell them they can't help you. Maybe write it down and hand the dr that if you can't face saying it?
0
Nothos
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#8454
Report 9 years ago
#8454
(Original post by Sabertooth)
:hugs: I know it's really scary but if you don't tell them they can't help you. Maybe write it down and hand the dr that if you can't face saying it?
It's not the saying, although that is hard, it's more the reaction it will cause that I'm scared of...
0
xxkaylsxx
Badges: 0
Rep:
?
#8455
Report 9 years ago
#8455
(Original post by BruceTaylor)
It's not the saying, although that is hard, it's more the reaction it will cause that I'm scared of...
Im sure your doctor has other patients who has similar problems or has had similar experiences so i doubt he would be too shocked.
Going to see the doctor is probably the best thing and at least if he does seem shocked it will only be once and you can get the help you need :hugs:
0
Sabertooth
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#8456
Report 9 years ago
#8456
(Original post by BruceTaylor)
It's not the saying, although that is hard, it's more the reaction it will cause that I'm scared of...
Oh right. Are you seeing just a GP or psychiatrist atm? When I told my GP he told me about psychosis (absolutely terrifying me) then referred me to a psychiatrist. But didn't overreact or make me feel too crazy or anything. You might be prescribed anti-psychotics some time which are a bit nasty making you sleepy etc but not too scary either really once you get used to them. If you ever want to talk feel free to pm me.
0
Nothos
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#8457
Report 9 years ago
#8457
(Original post by Sabertooth)
Oh right. Are you seeing just a GP or psychiatrist atm? When I told my GP he told me about psychosis (absolutely terrifying me) then referred me to a psychiatrist. But didn't overreact or make me feel too crazy or anything. You might be prescribed anti-psychotics some time which are a bit nasty making you sleepy etc but not too scary either really once you get used to them. If you ever want to talk feel free to pm me.
(Original post by xxkaylsxx)
Im sure your doctor has other patients who has similar problems or has had similar experiences so i doubt he would be too shocked.
Going to see the doctor is probably the best thing and at least if he does seem shocked it will only be once and you can get the help you need :hugs:
There's a lot I've not said. Firstly I'm back in my home town at the moment, I'm no longer registered with my doctor. Last time I saw a doctor about this I was so nearly detained for my own safety that I know if I go back and mention the full extent of how I'm feeling (Which I've not really laid out here, it'll just be a long rant) that they'll probably want to do it again and I was in the place I was going to be detained in, it was horrible, I can't face it :cry:
0
Sabertooth
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#8458
Report 9 years ago
#8458
(Original post by BruceTaylor)
There's a lot I've not said. Firstly I'm back in my home town at the moment, I'm no longer registered with my doctor. Last time I saw a doctor about this I was so nearly detained for my own safety that I know if I go back and mention the full extent of how I'm feeling (Which I've not really laid out here, it'll just be a long rant) that they'll probably want to do it again and I was in the place I was going to be detained in, it was horrible, I can't face it :cry:
That's a difficult one, I'm sorry to hear you had a bad experience. However, I'm pretty sure it's not the voices they'll try and detain you for (though I'm not a doctor), it's usually suicidal/homicidal feelings, which tbh, if you're having maybe it's for the best you talk to someone? I know so long as I promise my psychiatrist/CPN that I won't do anything I'm free, could you maybe try making such an arrangement? Unless of course you are planning on doing something in which case please don't, please seek help. :hugs:
0
special1ne
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#8459
Report 9 years ago
#8459
(Original post by sian_bedford)
Have had such a strange day today

how is everyone?
I'm alright thanks. Managed to slog 10 hours of work on the computer. It seems like I should be proud of that, but there's nothing I can do that's worth being proud of.
What happened Sian? Want to talk about it? You can PM if you choose to
0
diamonddust
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#8460
Report 9 years ago
#8460
(Original post by sian_bedford)
Have had such a strange day today :cry:

how is everyone?
Oh Sian, what's wrong?

I'm not doing too well. I went on a long walk, just got back actually, and it didn't really clear my head. I just want to die. I hate this, I feel like a corspe. I keep counting the number of pills I have been hoarding up. I haven't got enough yet and do I really want to die of liver failiure?
My mum told my aunt on the phone when I was in the room that it's my fault she's stressed because I just sit there staring into space and I don't do anything, she said she can't wait until I go to university and leave her on her own so she can pretend she never had children.

I only managed to do one study for Psychology today so it's looking like I might do worse than I should. As usual.

On a happier note, my sister booked me surprise tickets to see A Midsummer Night's Dream at the Globe. Funny thing is, I'm not excited.

I got a letter from my psych today, she basically says I have to go back so 'we' can figure out how to manage my difficulties with low mood and hopeless thoughts and she says she'll ask her colleagues if they can offer me CBT.
So at least that's something.

But tbh, I can't see anything helping. I tried CBT and it made no difference. I tried antidepressants and they made no difference. I'll try it again but I don't see why I should when there doesn't seem to be any point in my getting better anyway. Say I do get better, then what? I'll still be exactly the same person. Nobody will like me anymore then than they do now. I will just feel less **** than I do now.

Right now, I just feel worthless. I have nothing that makes me special or even mediocre. I'm a complete and utter waste of space. I wish I'd never been born as much as my mum wishes she'd never had me.

Sorry for the negativity!
0
X
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you registered to vote?

Yes! (285)
37.7%
No - but I will (53)
7.01%
No - I don't want to (55)
7.28%
No - I can't vote (<18, not in UK, etc) (363)
48.02%

Watched Threads

View All