Depression Society MkII Watch

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Pocket Calculator
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#8461
Report 9 years ago
#8461
How are we all? haven't been here for a while.

i've got that numbing anxiety again. absolutely dreading this summer, and the end of uni a year later. still have no idea what i'm going to be doing. so scared of finding myself alone and adrift. struggling to cope with revision and workload at the moment too. just wish there was someone here for a hug
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Dadeling
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#8462
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#8462
I havent been on here in an absolute age. I'm on citalopram now and it was kinda working at first but i'm not so sure anymore.

I feel like utter poop today. I've been filling out extenuating circumstance forms for my exams which start a week tomorrow, anyone have any experience of what happens with this? I've also e-mailed the uni counselling service to maybe get a session cause no one understands me or what i'm going though. I doubt a counseller will but someone just listening may be nice. I just want to be better and happy but i don't think it'll ever happen.

Right now I feel like finding the tallest building around and just letting my self fall. I imagine its quite peacefull, free falling.
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diamonddust
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#8463
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#8463
(Original post by sian_bedford)
Anyone around?
Have had another tough day. Think I have to ring my doctor in the morning. Am not entirely sure what to do. My life has crumbled around me. I can't stop crying

How is anyone else?
What happened? You can PM me if you want. :hugs:

And I'm a bit :|. I feel like I'm just biding my time. I just don't know what I'm doing, I feel so disorientated. I have this thing now that means whenever I drink a glass of water I have an urge to OD and whenever I eat I feel like being sick which can't be normal. But whatever. Don't care. I just have to survive until summer and then things will be better.
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blackfish
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#8464
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#8464
Anyone ever get the feeling that they really cannot be @rsed...?! I really couldn't care less now!
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diamonddust
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#8465
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#8465
(Original post by blackfish)
Anyone ever get the feeling that they really cannot be @rsed...?! I really couldn't care less now!
Yep. Got an exam on Friday and cba to revise for it (exams just don't seem to matter when you can't imagine a future for yourself), got out of bed at 4pm today even though I was awake at 10 because I couldn't see the point of getting up and I haven't read a book in months when I used to read at least 3 books a week.
The only thing I actually do voluntarily is go on the computer. :sigh:
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diamonddust
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#8466
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#8466
(Original post by sian_bedford)
Yes, and I have exams starting soon and I couldn't care less about them. I have stopped caring about pretty much everything and everyone. I feel all empty and dead inside right now.
:hugs:
Oh and Sian, I've replied to your PM.
:hugs:
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blackfish
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#8467
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#8467
(Original post by sian_bedford)
Yes, and I have exams starting soon and I couldn't care less about them. I have stopped caring about pretty much everything and everyone. I feel all empty and dead inside right now.
:hugs:
Thats how i'm beginning to feel, Ever since I got depressed i've turned into such a bitter person. I hate myself every day. Sometimes I just wonder what the point to my life is. I serve as a doormat to all my friends. I bet though if I went on holiday somewhere, nobody would notice!

I'm continuing on as normal by going to work and things, but I really cannot be bothered with my friends petty arguements over bluddy girls...! It stresses me out and they treat me like a f**king Telephone Exchange :mad:

I could really do with a friend right now Shame I don't have a decent one!
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blackfish
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#8468
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#8468
I just feel so alone, All my friends seem to take me for granted and dont seem to give a **** how I feel, I can't help but keep going, I just need to make sure I dont conk out completely, then i'll be back where I was 5 years ago

I'm tempted to take a train to Newcastle and go and see my friend. But I cannot be bothered with the journey. I guess that shows how rubbish i'm feeling, I'd normally jump at any oppertunity to take a train to Newcastle I just cannot be bothered with life at the moment.

I need a holiday. But I don't want to go on my own. I don't have anyone I can ask to come on holiday that will be sensible!

I'm gonna get a coffee now
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jonathan122
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#8469
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#8469
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Pocket Calculator
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#8470
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#8470
(Original post by diamonddust)
Yep. Got an exam on Friday and cba to revise for it (exams just don't seem to matter when you can't imagine a future for yourself),
ugh, i know. the only reason i want to do well in mine is so i qualify for the 4th year, and i only want to do that so i can prolong my existance in this city for another year. the degree barely matters to me anymore. i can't fathom how i'd ever survive after uni. i'm barely surviving as it is. crashed again in the last few days, was going so well for a few weeks. i know why it's happened, but there's nothing i can do about it
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Nothos
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#8471
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#8471
Went to my doctor at home after a crappy weekend.

He couldn't do anything because he's not my registered GP anymore. What an absolute waste of time :cry:
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Sabertooth
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#8472
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#8472
Can anyone help me out please? I've got some nasty emails questioning why I've not been at lectures the past week, I need to reply without saying "I was afraid I'd kill myself if I stayed any longer at uni". I'm so **** at writing stuff like this, I don't want to say I'm "ill" because that means owning up to it, my tutor knows I'm not in the best frame of mind mentally but this doesn't seem to have been passed to my lecturers.
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jonathan122
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#8473
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#8473
(Original post by Sabertooth)
Can anyone help me out please? I've got some nasty emails questioning why I've not been at lectures the past week, I need to reply without saying "I was afraid I'd kill myself if I stayed any longer at uni". I'm so **** at writing stuff like this, I don't want to say I'm "ill" because that means owning up to it, my tutor knows I'm not in the best frame of mind mentally but this doesn't seem to have been passed to my lecturers.
Hi saber.

Could you just say that, due to circumstances beyond your control, you had to go home for a while, and get your tutor to confirm it?
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Sabertooth
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#8474
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#8474
(Original post by jonathan122)
Hi saber.

Could you just say that, due to circumstances beyond your control, you had to go home for a while, and get your tutor to confirm it?
That's a pretty good way of putting it, thanks!

How're you, Jonathan?
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xxkaylsxx
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#8475
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#8475
i hate my life, wish it would all end :bawling:
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Pocket Calculator
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#8476
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#8476
(Original post by xxkaylsxx)
i hate my life, wish it would all end :bawling:
why, what's up?
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jonathan122
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#8477
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#8477
(Original post by Sabertooth)
That's a pretty good way of putting it, thanks!

How're you, Jonathan?
Pretty down at the moment. My ex-friends were all back at college for graduation this weekend, so I had to clear out back home again. I miss them.

How are you? Are you still at home, or have you gone back to uni? :hugs:
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xxkaylsxx
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#8478
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#8478
(Original post by Pocket Calculator)
why, what's up?
It seems ridiculous compared to everyone elses problems.
Im just really struggling to cope with my exams and it doesnt help that most of them are new specs so the teachers dont know what they are doing either.
My best friend and i have also had a huge argument and she doesnt seem to care that we arent friends anymore. i feel so lost and invisible and i doubt anyone would even notice if i dissapeared.
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blackfish
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#8479
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#8479
I had a scary dream last night. It was bad, I'm not sure I can even talk about it I would say it's a warning. Considering the events that unfolded today i'm getting quite scared I was followed by some complete weirdo today...! I feel like everyone is plotting behind my back and that I am going to have a major mind crash soon

I'm fed up with dealing with all my friends problems. I never get time to focus on getting myself on track. I can't tell anyone whats going on. I keep getting hassled by all the wrong people. I'm tempted to go for a walk into town, but at this ungodly hour, I really cannot be bothered!
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special1ne
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#8480
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#8480
You can PM me if you wish. It's sometimes good to talk to others about things like these; that way you're not alone
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