Depression Society MkII Watch

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Immunity
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#9541
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#9541
(Original post by lauren_lfc)
hey hope ppl dnt mind me posting, had a horrible past few days =[.

Im basically typing to get things off my chest a bit so if i make no sense then i apologise now.

So ive had a lot happen to me over the last 7/8 months and it just never seems to go away. I can be happy for a day or few then something happens to bring it all back. This weeks no different and my parents are constantly having a go at me and treating me like a complete child. Theyve told me ill be disowned by all my family if i dont agree with what they thinks best for me - i basically want to move back to leeds from liverpool and they disagree with this. i get that they care about me but im 19 and was planning on moving back when im 20 but theyve said even then they wont agree with it. I dont know what im trying to get out of this. I just feel like i want to go away NOW and jsut forget all my family and do what i want and just be happy. i still dont want to lose my family though! Anyways i apologise for the pointless ramble
It isn't pointless if it helps you
Am not too sure what to suggest, but there comes a point where you have to make your own decisions. Your family sound like they are overreacting a little to say they'll disown you. Let them calm down etc, give it a few days then approach the subject again. Maybe they just need to adjust to it

:hugs: to all
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lauren_lfc
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#9542
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#9542
(Original post by Immunity)
It isn't pointless if it helps you
Am not too sure what to suggest, but there comes a point where you have to make your own decisions. Your family sound like they are overreacting a little to say they'll disown you. Let them calm down etc, give it a few days then approach the subject again. Maybe they just need to adjust to it

:hugs: to all
theyve been like this for 7 months now so i dont think they'll budge =[. just fed up of everythin atm, had a good few weeks to and now im back to the same old way. i really think moving away will help me out even more but losing my familys a big risk. ahhhh thanks for the reply anyways, just thinking of loadsa things atm.
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Immunity
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#9543
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#9543
(Original post by lauren_lfc)
theyve been like this for 7 months now so i dont think they'll budge =[. just fed up of everythin atm, had a good few weeks to and now im back to the same old way. i really think moving away will help me out even more but losing my familys a big risk. ahhhh thanks for the reply anyways, just thinking of loadsa things atm.
Well we are here to listen if you ever need someone. Perhaps you should do what you think is best for you. Hope things work out :hugs:
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Laus
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#9544
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#9544
I feel awful. I know it's a silly thing to feel upset about, but I might as well tell you.

When I was 15 I was reunited with my friend and her husband. I had known her and her three sisters since I was a baby. As I was older we were able to talk and we got on really well, despite her being ten years older than me. We lived in a flat type place and her and her hubby moved in below us. I saw them both almost everyday and we became really close. She used to call me her sister and I never ever imagined being as close to someone as I was her. My relationship with her husband was just as wonderful and I never ever wanted our friendship to end. We planned to do so much together. Anyway, to cut a very long story short, things went wrong at work for my friend's hubby and they both had to move away. Just before that we moved out, which was a huge blow in itself, as being close to them meant so much to me. I had gone through some difficult times at home and having their place to go to was like a sanctuary. Anyway, when they left I was heart-broken; I cried for months and I just felt awful and as though I had lost something essential. It was more than a friendship, they were like family. Shortly after they left my periods stopped (due to stress, I think) and then I lost my appetite and lost a lot of weight. I was underweight for a couple of years until I went on medication, which helped to level things out again. I last saw them both at my brother's wedding (when I was 19, almost 20.) I'm now 21 and I haven't seen them since.

I know it's not their fault that they had to leave, but I can't explain to anyone the sense of loss I felt and the impact it has had on my life. Previously we lived somewhere I adored and the friends I made were fantastic. I pretty much resigned myself to never finding true friends again. I made some friends, but this couple have been the only friends I have had who have made a huge difference to my life. Their departure was quite messy too, although I don't want or need to go into detail.

I feel like I have lost both of them. I feel like it's too late and I'm too old to rekindle anything we once had. I'm also terrified. I needed her to help me at one point and she didn't help, even though I've always gone out of my way to be there for her. I understand she has been through a hard time as well and that she has a family, but I really needed her. And I need her again, now. I don't need someone to give me constant support; I don't even need a shoulder to cry on, I just need a friend that I can trust wholeheartedly. I tried to talk to her when I was at my wits end but it seemed as though she didn't care. I've hardened a lot. I'm not as sensitive or as caring as I used to be. I try too hard and it's tiring.

I'm jealous because I saw someone post on her facebook wall... basically my old friend said how much she missed her and how she loved her "enormously"; things she used to say to me, if I'm honest. And she called her an auntie, which was what I was called when she had her first daughter. I know it's petty and I know people can have more than one friend. It's not that that has upset me. It just reminded me of the friendship I lost and how lonely I feel without her in my life.
jonathan122
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#9545
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#9545
(Original post by Laus)
I feel awful. I know it's a silly thing to feel upset about, but I might as well tell you.

When I was 15 I was reunited with my friend and her husband. I had known her and her three sisters since I was a baby. As I was older we were able to talk and we got on really well, despite her being ten years older than me. We lived in a flat type place and her and her hubby moved in below us. I saw them both almost everyday and we became really close. She used to call me her sister and I never ever imagined being as close to someone as I was her. My relationship with her husband was just as wonderful and I never ever wanted our friendship to end. We planned to do so much together. Anyway, to cut a very long story short, things went wrong at work for my friend's hubby and they both had to move away. Just before that we moved out, which was a huge blow in itself, as being close to them meant so much to me. I had gone through some difficult times at home and having their place to go to was like a sanctuary. Anyway, when they left I was heart-broken; I cried for months and I just felt awful and as though I had lost something essential. It was more than a friendship, they were like family. Shortly after they left my periods stopped (due to stress, I think) and then I lost my appetite and lost a lot of weight. I was underweight for a couple of years until I went on medication, which helped to level things out again. I last saw them both at my brother's wedding (when I was 19, almost 20.) I'm now 21 and I haven't seen them since.

I know it's not their fault that they had to leave, but I can't explain to anyone the sense of loss I felt and the impact it has had on my life. Previously we lived somewhere I adored and the friends I made were fantastic. I pretty much resigned myself to never finding true friends again. I made some friends, but this couple have been the only friends I have had who have made a huge difference to my life. Their departure was quite messy too, although I don't want or need to go into detail.

I feel like I have lost both of them. I feel like it's too late and I'm too old to rekindle anything we once had. I'm also terrified. I needed her to help me at one point and she didn't help, even though I've always gone out of my way to be there for her. I understand she has been through a hard time as well and that she has a family, but I really needed her. And I need her again, now. I don't need someone to give me constant support; I don't even need a shoulder to cry on, I just need a friend that I can trust wholeheartedly. I tried to talk to her when I was at my wits end but it seemed as though she didn't care. I've hardened a lot. I'm not as sensitive or as caring as I used to be. I try too hard and it's tiring.

I'm jealous because I saw someone post on her facebook wall... basically my old friend said how much she missed her and how she loved her "enormously"; things she used to say to me, if I'm honest. And she called her an auntie, which was what I was called when she had her first daughter. I know it's petty and I know people can have more than one friend. It's not that that has upset me. It just reminded me of the friendship I lost and how lonely I feel without her in my life.
:sadnod:

I know exactly what you mean, I'm afraid

:hugs:
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Laus
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#9546
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#9546
Although I am better than I was, I still feel as though I'm failing some days; taking one step forward and falling two steps back. It's like a gradual but inevitable decline. I want to cry but I can't.

When I'm with most people I feel out of place. I know we all go through hard times and we all have our low moments, but I can't relate to many people at all. And I can't explain how I'm feeling because there's no point and it's hard to articulate, anyway.

If I saw a psychiatrist I wouldn't know what to say, or else they would just ask me textbook questions that don't really get any relevant answers... I just feel so lost and I'm frightened about everything.

I can be very laidback but sometimes I feel almost crippled by how I feel, and it is not something I can explain to anyone.
Laus
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#9547
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#9547
(Original post by jonathan122)
:sadnod:

I know exactly what you mean, I'm afraid

:hugs:
I wish you didn't.

:hugs:
Immunity
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#9548
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#9548
I know how you feel about losing people you are very close to. Also about feeling all alone and as if you can't have true friends :hugs:
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death.drop
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#9549
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#9549
same old problems. same old feelings. so sick of it.

how is everyone?
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Vienna Cannon
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#9550
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#9550
how is everyone today?
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-M$ [email protected]
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#9551
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#9551
(Original post by Laus)
Although I am better than I was, I still feel as though I'm failing some days; taking one step forward and falling two steps back. It's like a gradual but inevitable decline. I want to cry but I can't.

When I'm with most people I feel out of place. I know we all go through hard times and we all have our low moments, but I can't relate to many people at all. And I can't explain how I'm feeling because there's no point and it's hard to articulate, anyway.

If I saw a psychiatrist I wouldn't know what to say, or else they would just ask me textbook questions that don't really get any relevant answers... I just feel so lost and I'm frightened about everything.

I can be very laidback but sometimes I feel almost crippled by how I feel, and it is not something I can explain to anyone.
awww, my luvly sweeetheart. So sorrt to hear that. Uni life is also as depressing? :sad: I missed talking to you .

I can understand how you are feeling and I read how much you've been suffering. I really wish I could be a support in real life but unfortunately we're too far :hugs:

love ya!
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Pocket Calculator
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#9552
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#9552
i seem to have found myself a canadian girlfriend. i presume that's a good thing, but i don't feel much better
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death.drop
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#9553
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#9553
(Original post by Pocket Calculator)
i seem to have found myself a canadian girlfriend. i presume that's a good thing, but i don't feel much better
seem to have?
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Pocket Calculator
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#9554
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#9554
(Original post by death.drop)
seem to have?
haha. yeah, well she wants to be with me. there's no reason for me to push her away, i do like her. but it just doesn't feel quite right. i'm suprised i feel this way considering how long i've been single.
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Deyesy
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#9555
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#9555
(Original post by Pocket Calculator)
haha. yeah, well she wants to be with me. there's no reason for me to push her away, i do like her. but it just doesn't feel quite right. i'm suprised i feel this way considering how lonf i've been single.
Sorry to butt in, but I've felt like that before. I felt it with my ex. I liked her and she liked me but it just didn't feel right. Needless to say, it didn't work out

I hope it works for you though
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death.drop
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#9556
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#9556
(Original post by Pocket Calculator)
haha. yeah, well she wants to be with me. there's no reason for me to push her away, i do like her. but it just doesn't feel quite right. i'm suprised i feel this way considering how lonf i've been single.

have you known her long?
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Pocket Calculator
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#9557
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#9557
(Original post by death.drop)

have you known her long?
nope, only a month or so. but i definitely do like her.

even if i don't stay with her i want to keep her as a close friend. she's given me a life over here. without her i'll be housebound for the rest of summer.

i'm worried about the future if i do stay with her - when i come back to the UK i have no idea how long it will be until i see her again. and within a year i'll have to decide once and for all which country i want to stay in. if that comes out as the UK then that will probably be the end of us. but she's the only person i really know in canada - and if i choose to settle over here i would have no life outside of her.
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death.drop
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#9558
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#9558
(Original post by Pocket Calculator)
nope, only a month or so. but i definitely do like her.

even if i don't stay with her i want to keep her as a close friend. she's given me a life over here. without her i'll be housebound for the rest of summer.

i'm worried about the future if i do stay with her - when i come back to the UK i have no idea how long it will be until i see her again. and within a year i'll have to decide once and for all which country i want to stay in. if that comes out as the UK then that will probably be the end of us. but she's the only person i really know in canada - and if i choose to settle over here i would have no life outside of her.
doesn't she have any friends that she goes out with? you could go out with them and get to know more people. if you get a job over there you'll meet people that way.
if I were you i'd talk to her about exactly how you feel, encourage her to share her side of things.
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Pocket Calculator
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#9559
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#9559
(Original post by death.drop)
doesn't she have any friends that she goes out with? you could go out with them and get to know more people.
yeah, i really hope i can get in with some of them, but i haven't really had a chane yet.
if you get a job over there you'll meet people that way.
i've been trying that since i got here. there are zero jobs. i've gone to 5 or 6 agencies and they've all pretty much told me to fuсk off.
if I were you i'd talk to her about exactly how you feel, encourage her to share her side of things.
i have done, i think she understands me.
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death.drop
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#9560
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#9560
(Original post by Jade2009)
Thankyou!

Basically for the past year my life has gone downhill due to losing a lot of friends and having family problems. I haven't spoken to anybody about it for such a long time but I'm hoping that people on here would be willing to talk By the way I don't mind giving other people advice also, so if anybody wanted to chat then I am here too :hugs:
hey, i just saw in another thread that you live really near me (minehead) so if you ever want to come out for pub night or anything then feel free. i'd always be willing to listen and it can help to have someone nearby to go to if you're in a crisis.
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