Depression Society MkII Watch

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Vienna Cannon
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#9641
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#9641
(Original post by blackfish)
I'm Psychotic anyway, but when I was on fluoxetine I was a complete and utter zombie... It killed my concentration, reacted with my other medication and then started messing with my head... Eventually I tried topping myself numerous times so don't be to disheartened that it doesn't work for you...

I would ask for a Psychiatrists referal or a second opinion at the very least...??
I really cannot stand taking it any more. I can't stand the way it makes me feel. I would rather be depressed than on that ****
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Wish I Could Change This
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(Original post by Sabertooth)
Hey there

You said that writing stuff down and listening to music doesn't really solve anything, what is it you're trying to solve do you know? Just general feeling down or something else?

I know this is unorthodox advice re: your birthday, but like you said you'd need an excuse to pull out now so why not just get a load of alcohol, get really drunk and try to forget how you're feeling? It's your birthday you shouldn't feel crap on your birthday.
soz, by solving i meant getting rid of feeling like this all the time..
and I did go through with the birthday party and it turned out sort of ok but everyone else had fun.. and I've got some new CD's to listen to
also, i don't drink and i've heard it makes you feel worse in the long-term =/

(Original post by Immunity)
You sound like you need a hug :hugs:
don't worry about needing to let it all out, we all need to sream and for someone to listen at some point. I was in the same position involving a party a few months ago, I just pasted a smile on my face for that one night and cried myself to sleep each night since. I know what you mean about having to fake being happy, you just want to feel how you feel. Hope you are okay :hugs:
Thanks for replying but... I still don't see the point in life or what I'm doing anymore. Has anyone come out of depression without using anti-depressants? If so, what exactly did you do? Thanks.
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Sabertooth
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I feel so empty and spaced out, like I'm not really here, it's been like this since I woke up. Even my fingers feel fudgy on the keyboard. They won't leave me alone at all now they've been going on for days. I'll never be normal. I thought I'd sorted uni for next year but now I'm thinking of taking a year to try and sort myself out even though I know it's pointless I'll still be ****** up at the end of it. What's the point in all this?

might be triggering
Spoiler:
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I haven't cut in over a year now, I was so proud of that but now I keep getting horrible urges to do it, I know exactly where to cut, what with, how deep, everything, I'm scared I'm going to give into them and actually do it. I want the release so badly
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kiss_me_now9
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#9644
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#9644
:cry:
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jonathan122
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#9645
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#9645
(Original post by kiss_me_now9)
:cry:
Hey, what's up? :hugs:
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kiss_me_now9
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#9646
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#9646
(Original post by jonathan122)
Hey, what's up? :hugs:
My parents are arguing again and have blamed it on me.

I went to my room to listen to some music and just be alone for a while and my mum followed me up and started shouting at me because sitting here is being selfish apparently. I just want to be left alone atm
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kiss_me_now9
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#9647
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#9647
I've had the acoustic version of this song on for the last hour now. Thought the lyrics might be appreciated.

Swim by Jack's Mannequin

You gotta swim
Swim for your life
Swim for the music that saves you
When you're not so sure you'll survive

You gotta swim
And swim when it hurts
The whole world is watching
You haven't come this far
To fall off the Earth

The currents will pull you
Away from your love
Just keep your head above

I found a tidal wave
Begging to tear down the dawn
Memories like bullets
They fired at me from a gun
Cracking the armour, yeah

I swim for brighter days
Despite the absense of sun
Choking on salt water
I'm not giving in
I swim

You gotta swim
Through nights that won't end
Swim for your family, your lovers
Your sisters and brothers and friends

Yeah you gotta swim
For wars without cause
Swim for these lost politicians
Who don't see their greed is a flaw

The currents will pull us
Away from our love
Just keep your head above

I found a tidal wave
Begging to tear down the dawn
Memories like bullets
They fired at me from a gun
Cracking the armour, yeah

I swim for brighter days
Despite the absense of sun
Choking on salt water
I'm not giving in
I'm not giving in
I swim

You gotta swim
Swim in the dark
There's no shame in driftin'
Feel the tide shifting
And wait for the spark

Yeah you gotta swim
Don't let yourself sink
Just find the horizon
I promise you it's not as far as you think

The currents will drag us away from our love
Just keep your head above

Just keep your head above
Swim

Just keep your head above
Swim

Just keep your head above
Swim
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kiss_me_now9
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#9648
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#9648
Anyone around? :cry:
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death.drop
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#9649
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#9649
i'm here. what's up?
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jonathan122
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#9650
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#9650
(Original post by kiss_me_now9)
Anyone around? :cry:
:hugs: What's up?
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kiss_me_now9
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#9651
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#9651
(Original post by death.drop)
i'm here. what's up?
(Original post by jonathon122)
What's up?
My mums being a right *****, she hasn't spoken to me since last night and doesn't seem to care at all about me, she's had another go at my Dad for no reason and now she's gone out with a mate of hers and left us with no dinner. Not that I'm hungry. I woke up with the most god awful period pains this morning after about two hours of sleep and so I slept for most of the day... but she doesn't care. No-ones said more than two sentances to me all afternoon. I don't understand why they're punishing me for something I can't change or I didn't do. I don't want to play their stupid ******* games anymore.. I don't want any of this anymore :cry:

I'm sat in my room listening to sad music again and trying to cry silently so my Dad doesn't hear, he's watching the athletics and I don't want to disturb him. I just don't know what to do anymore
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death.drop
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#9652
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(Original post by kiss_me_now9)
My mums being a right *****, she hasn't spoken to me since last night and doesn't seem to care at all about me, she's had another go at my Dad for no reason and now she's gone out with a mate of hers and left us with no dinner. Not that I'm hungry. I woke up with the most god awful period pains this morning after about two hours of sleep and so I slept for most of the day... but she doesn't care. No-ones said more than two sentances to me all afternoon. I don't understand why they're punishing me for something I can't change or I didn't do. I don't want to play their stupid ******* games anymore.. I don't want any of this anymore :cry:

I'm sat in my room listening to sad music again and trying to cry silently so my Dad doesn't hear, he's watching the athletics and I don't want to disturb him. I just don't know what to do anymore
*hugs*
have you thought about trying to talk to your dad? your mum seems to be the problem, you've still got one parent to get support from.
how are you feeling now? as far as your cramps are concerned? taken painkillers? If you feel up to it maybe you should take a walk. I always find getting out of the house and away from where I started feeling like crap usually helps.

have you seen anyone about moving out? citizens advice or anything?
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kiss_me_now9
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#9653
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(Original post by death.drop)
*hugs*
have you thought about trying to talk to your dad? your mum seems to be the problem, you've still got one parent to get support from.
how are you feeling now? as far as your cramps are concerned? taken painkillers? If you feel up to it maybe you should take a walk. I always find getting out of the house and away from where I started feeling like crap usually helps.

have you seen anyone about moving out? citizens advice or anything?
Just feel pretty ****** atm, cramps are ok because I took a paracetamol this morning and slept through the day, stupidly they're agony until about an hour after I take some painkillers and then they don't bother me at all for the rest of the time... :shifty: I don't want to go out anywhere... I'd rather stay here. There's nowhere to go in my town, not even a field or something. And I don't think my dad would let me, even though I'm 19. I can't afford to move out, I don't have a job and I don't want to go back on benefits, I can't drive and I'm meant to be starting an Access to Higher Ed. Diploma in September which I definatly couldn't afford if I was on my own, I looked into it before. Even in my old job I wouldn't have been able to afford it.
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death.drop
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#9654
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(Original post by kiss_me_now9)
Just feel pretty ****** atm, cramps are ok because I took a paracetamol this morning and slept through the day, stupidly they're agony until about an hour after I take some painkillers and then they don't bother me at all for the rest of the time... :shifty: I don't want to go out anywhere... I'd rather stay here. There's nowhere to go in my town, not even a field or something. And I don't think my dad would let me, even though I'm 19. I can't afford to move out, I don't have a job and I don't want to go back on benefits, I can't drive and I'm meant to be starting an Access to Higher Ed. Diploma in September which I definatly couldn't afford if I was on my own, I looked into it before. Even in my old job I wouldn't have been able to afford it.
well i guess that's your choice to make. personally i'd rather go on benefits in your situation because your mum seems to be a huge part of why you feel like you do.
congratulations on starting the access course though! hopefully when you start that it will make you feel like you're really changing your situation. At least you're doing something about your situation, it takes courage and resolve to do something like that, it's not something everyone can do. A lot of people end up consumed by their depression, it's not something that's easy to live with. really well done.
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kiss_me_now9
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#9655
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#9655
(Original post by death.drop)
well i guess that's your choice to make. personally i'd rather go on benefits in your situation because your mum seems to be a huge part of why you feel like you do.
congratulations on starting the access course though! hopefully when you start that it will make you feel like you're really changing your situation. At least you're doing something about your situation, it takes courage and resolve to do something like that, it's not something everyone can do. A lot of people end up consumed by their depression, it's not something that's easy to live with. really well done.
Yes, I suppose, thing is the Access course is only a year long so next September I'll hopefully be going back to uni to study psychology, and my parents are moving out of this house next October anyway, so either way this time next year I'll be heading somewhere else away from my parents. I figure I can wait it out until then... when we get along me and my mum get along like a house on fire, unfortunatly when we don't we also get along like a house on fire... in a bad way.
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upturnedpalms
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#9656
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Anyone round here remember me?
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jonathan122
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#9657
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#9657
(Original post by upturnedpalms)
Anyone round here remember me?
Hi Hannah :hugs:

How are you? When do your results come out? :hugs:
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starchild
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#9658
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#9658
Hi folks, im back from London. Glad im free from there to be honest. Mum just made me feel like nothing for the rest of my time there. Hope everyone is ok.

:hugs: and home baked cookies for you all

Sitara xxxxxx
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jonathan122
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#9659
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#9659
(Original post by starchild)
Hi folks, im back from London. Glad im free from there to be honest. Mum just made me feel like nothing for the rest of my time there. Hope everyone is ok.

:hugs: and home baked cookies for you all

Sitara xxxxxx
:hugs:
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gooner1991
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#9660
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#9660
I wish there was an instant remedy for lack of confidence.
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