Depression Society MkII Watch

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diamonddust
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#9841
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#9841
(Original post by twizzle)
I apply for so many jobs at so many firms and they all reject me even without an interview,how the hell am i ever gonna get a training contract and become a solicitor, i just need a chance and no-one wants to give me it, i can't take failure anymore, things are bad enough without being turned down all the time. Life isn't fair. It's ****. I don't have anything and some people have so much and take it for granted.
:hugs: I'm sorry. All I can say, as cliched as it is, is keep trying. Rejection is **** but sooner or later someone will give you a job. It might take a while to get there but I'm sure you can do it! Do you know why the firms rejected you? Maybe you could get some feedback and work on the weak parts of your application if there are any. :console:

And Jonathan (how are you btw?),I didn't know depression counted as a disability (though it is really). I was gonna put it down when I applied for a job today but I refused to. Why do they need to know? I mean I can understand unis knowing so they can give you extra support but what can an employer do? Will they be accommodating if you feel too drained to get out of bed or will they be like most other people and tell you to 'get a grip' (HATE that saying). Most 'outsiders' (people who aren't mental health professionals/sufferers/friends of sufferers/understanding) have a 'stop being so self indulgent, there are people dying in X' attitude to depression and I don't see how an employer will be any different.

Sorry, I don't expect you to answer any of these questions lol
I was just thinking aloud.
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Sabertooth
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#9842
(Original post by diamonddust)
Thanks Saber. :hugs:
I'm trying, it's just so ******* hard and I don't want to but I'm gonna shut up now.
How are you doing? xx
Don't feel the need to shut up :p: Rant if it makes you feel better, getting it out somewhere can be really beneficial. :hugs:


I'm not bad, not too good either, my friend is forcing me to see a psychiatrist other than mine (long story) really don't want to. Thanks for asking.


Re: jobs, tbh, I would keep quiet about depression. Yes like Jonathan said it's illegal to discriminate against people with mental health difficulties but something like 60% of employers admitted they wouldn't hire someone with them (source: lib dem speech in parliament). Also the general public are pretty ill-informed with them more willing to go on holiday with someone with a criminal record than mental health problems (can't remember source, sorry, some recent paper article). If however you're willing to chance it they can make exceptions like perhaps lowering your hours if you're having a particularly bad time for a brief period and when it comes to things like sick notes from doctors they might be more understanding. It is really hard to get a job right now, twizzle, so it might not be anything to do with you there's just so much competition in the job market. Try to keep your chin up and keep trying, perhaps get down the job centre and ask them to take a look at your CV, check it's well done etc?
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jonathan122
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#9843
(Original post by diamonddust)
:hugs: I'm sorry. All I can say, as cliched as it is, is keep trying. Rejection is **** but sooner or later someone will give you a job. It might take a while to get there but I'm sure you can do it! Do you know why the firms rejected you? Maybe you could get some feedback and work on the weak parts of your application if there are any. :console:

And Jonathan (how are you btw?),I didn't know depression counted as a disability (though it is really). I was gonna put it down when I applied for a job today but I refused to. Why do they need to know? I mean I can understand unis knowing so they can give you extra support but what can an employer do? Will they be accommodating if you feel too drained to get out of bed or will they be like most other people and tell you to 'get a grip' (HATE that saying). Most 'outsiders' (people who aren't mental health professionals/sufferers/friends of sufferers/understanding) have a 'stop being so self indulgent, there are people dying in X' attitude to depression and I don't see how an employer will be any different.

Sorry, I don't expect you to answer any of these questions lol
I was just thinking aloud.
Hi diamonddust :hugs:

For legal reasons, a disability counts as an illness or injury which affects you, or is likely to affect you, for a year or more, so clinical depression does count as a disability. As far as employers are concerned, they have a legal responsibility to make "reasonable adjustments" for disabled employees or interview candidates, so that they are not at an unfair advantage. This could include things like arranging for working hours that give you time to get out of bed on days that you're feeling particularlu drained, or arranging for a job-share. Of course, although it's a legal requirement, it's still possible for some employers to get round these rules, but in general, a responsible emplyer will have measures in place to support disabled employees.

As far as declaring your depression on a job application goes, you're not required to give medical details unless the application form specifically asks for them. If they do ask and you don't put down your depression, then that technically could count as grounds for dismissal if they ever find out about it, although as far as I know there's only been one case of that type in the UK, and in the end it was ruled that the employee was within her rights to withold that medical information. (I'm just quoting from memory here, however!)

Hope you're well. :hugs:
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twizzle
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thanks jonathon and sabertooth! i think i'll keep it quiet for now, but i'm just wondering what happens with regards to university exams/coursework and depression? do they give you extra time for it? or give you a percentage more? i've found it so hard to concentrate on revising for my resit at the minute, no matter how much i force myself to read the book, make notes, try a billion different ways, nothing seems to be sinking in and i get distracted after about 10 minutes, any tips?
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jonathan122
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(Original post by twizzle)
thanks jonathon and sabertooth! i think i'll keep it quiet for now, but i'm just wondering what happens with regards to university exams/coursework and depression? do they give you extra time for it? or give you a percentage more? i've found it so hard to concentrate on revising for my resit at the minute, no matter how much i force myself to read the book, make notes, try a billion different ways, nothing seems to be sinking in and i get distracted after about 10 minutes, any tips?
Your college/uni should have a disability department that you can e-mail - they should be able to help you with regards to exams and coursework. In my case I was given a choice between having extra time and a room on my own for exams or just having a doctors note which the examiners would take into account if any of my papers were near a grade boundary - however I think different unis would consider each case individually, and then decide what help they could offer you.

Do you mind me asking whic uni you're at? :hugs:
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Sabertooth
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#9846
(Original post by twizzle)
thanks jonathon and sabertooth! i think i'll keep it quiet for now, but i'm just wondering what happens with regards to university exams/coursework and depression? do they give you extra time for it? or give you a percentage more? i've found it so hard to concentrate on revising for my resit at the minute, no matter how much i force myself to read the book, make notes, try a billion different ways, nothing seems to be sinking in and i get distracted after about 10 minutes, any tips?
Have you tried recording your lectures on a dictaphone? I know that's a bit late for now (well I guess you could try talking into one and then playing it back now, some people learn better like that) but like for next year. Like Jonathan says talk to your disability office at your uni and see what they say, mine lent me a dictaphone for the year, gave me extra time in exams, exams in a smaller room and even helped me find somewhere to live next year which is all awesome. I found they've been really helpful and understanding because, like you, I was having a really hard time concentrating on the work.

You can also apply for DSA (disabled students allowance), which will do stuff like give you a dictaphone or software for your computer to make it easier for you to do the work.
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twizzle
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(Original post by jonathan122)
Your college/uni should have a disability department that you can e-mail - they should be able to help you with regards to exams and coursework. In my case I was given a choice between having extra time and a room on my own for exams or just having a doctors note which the examiners would take into account if any of my papers were near a grade boundary - however I think different unis would consider each case individually, and then decide what help they could offer you.

Do you mind me asking whic uni you're at? :hugs:
I'm at Manchester Met, which is good, but now I just feel like it's filled with a lot of unhappy memories, i don't want to go into 3rd year and end up hating it again or look back on my time at uni as unhappy. Thing is I used to love manchester before all this and couldn't wait to come back after the holidays. I'll look into all this when i get back. I don't like being ill, I don't feel normal anymore. You guys are really helpful too though esp you and sabertooth
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Segat1
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#9848
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#9848
Random questions and yes, I'll be asking my doctor about this. I have to travel long haul on Monday and given I take my meds at 8am, how do I manage the taking of the meds in a different time zone? I'll be GMT -8 and I can't work this stuff out in my head. I don't think I would have a problem taking them in the evening (and hope I don't lie awake) but I wanted to know if anyone else has done this before and how they got on? I'm on Citaprolam. Fankooo.
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jonathan122
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#9849
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#9849
(Original post by twizzle)
I'm at Manchester Met, which is good, but now I just feel like it's filled with a lot of unhappy memories, i don't want to go into 3rd year and end up hating it again or look back on my time at uni as unhappy. Thing is I used to love manchester before all this and couldn't wait to come back after the holidays. I'll look into all this when i get back. I don't like being ill, I don't feel normal anymore. You guys are really helpful too though esp you and sabertooth
http://www.mmu.ac.uk/academic/studse...ed_studies.php

Hope this helps a bit. :hugs:
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SuicidalLemming
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#9850
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Anyone know that if I contact my college and tell them I've been diagnosed with depression, that I'll get any extra time or anything in exam period? I missed so much college last year just because I was so depressed I couldn't get out of bed, and although my meds work reasonably well, I still have days when I miss college because of it.. Seriously worried about applying for uni and all that this year :erm:
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jonathan122
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#9851
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#9851
(Original post by SuicidalLemming)
Anyone know that if I contact my college and tell them I've been diagnosed with depression, that I'll get any extra time or anything in exam period? I missed so much college last year just because I was so depressed I couldn't get out of bed, and although my meds work reasonably well, I still have days when I miss college because of it.. Seriously worried about applying for uni and all that this year :erm:
Yeah, you should be able to get extra time in exams because of your illness. :hugs: How was your appointment with the psychologist the other day?
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SuicidalLemming
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#9852
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#9852
(Original post by jonathan122)
Yeah, you should be able to get extra time in exams because of your illness. :hugs: How was your appointment with the psychologist the other day?
Thanks :hugs: It was..okay I think. I didn't really know what to expect, but she was really nice and made me feel comfortable..got to see her again next wednesday
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Vienna Cannon
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#9853
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#9853
(Original post by Segat1)
Random questions and yes, I'll be asking my doctor about this. I have to travel long haul on Monday and given I take my meds at 8am, how do I manage the taking of the meds in a different time zone? I'll be GMT -8 and I can't work this stuff out in my head. I don't think I would have a problem taking them in the evening (and hope I don't lie awake) but I wanted to know if anyone else has done this before and how they got on? I'm on Citaprolam. Fankooo.
well my suggestion is to slowly but gradually take it at a differnt time. so for example if you take your meds 8am uk time but say in australia it would be 9 hours difference (random guess) so would be around 5 slowly bring it down so go down by 30 mins the first day then do that time for 2-3 days and then lower again but by a larger amount etc etc and then you'll get it back to where you want it to be... or not best option but it is an option. Don't take it for one day and then take it from a time that you wish to take it from
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Vienna Cannon
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#9854
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#9854
Sorry I am going to do a longish rant now,
Spoiler:
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I have been feeling really ****** again and its strange that at night i feel so much worse (ill) than during the day. and I don't really know what has caused it. I slept in so late i didn't get up till about noon and I feel like I have wasted the whole day. I am meant to be paying money onto my credit card but I am so exhausted I cannot even get myself to go round to the bankj and lose another £15 of my money which I really don't want to do but the banks being generous with things considering I am over my card limit by nearly £200. It really frustrates me not having a job but I might be able to get one up in scotland with a restaurant. I hope I get it because it would be nice to have a job again.
I keep feeling low and getting a lot of nightmares I hoped I wouldn't get any any more but heh I guess I am still weak. I feel pathetic having so many nightmares. What really pisses me off is that sometimes they are slightly different and it scares me so much because i feel that they might actually happen
Spoiler:
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One nightmare is the two men who attacked me find me where I am staying and it happens all over again but instead they drag my friend down and force him to participate and when refusing to they slit his throat, When I wake I panic and start crying because I was so scared that somehow it had happened and it feels so real.
It makes me see just how much they have affected me even now 3 years on I hate going out by myself I hate being alone and I prefer to lock myself away where I know that I am safe. But I am starting to feel that I won't ever be safe anymore, No one really is safe. I want to be able to see the good things in life for what they really are and know what the bad things are but sometimes its hard to differnciate the differences between them. I hate being this weak. I want to be happy but I don't like being on meds. Fluoxetine made me try cutting my arm off because I thought it was trying to kill me and citalopram made me feel constantly drunk. I don't think meds will ever really help me. I just wish there was a medication with no side effects I would quite happily take it.
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blackfish
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#9855
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#9855
(Original post by Vienna Cannon)
:hugs: don't pay attention. how have you been feeling recently
Pretty awful... Alot of **** has happened, so far, July's events were:

Assaulted Twice
Had a £300 phone stolen
Received Abusive Phone Calls from someone who I would have called my friend
Nearly lost my job because the train was late 3 times
Had a rather large phone bill because the mobile phone company stuffed up...! But thats been sorted
My Ex was giving me grief that I never text her
Moved House
Developed an Eating Problem

I'll stop there before I start crying...

I feel completely and utterly worn... I sometimes wonder how long it's going to be before I have a complete breakdown...! My head is killing me from where I was assaulted, I am suffering from short term memory loss and things are getting quite serious because I have made a few critical errors recently... Like forget passwords to servers... I never forget passwords ever!

I can't eat anything...! I knew myself something wasn't right when I didn't finish my mums Sunday Lunch, I never not finish Sunday Lunch... Thems the rules Then I had a complimentary salad and cheese roll on the train, again, I couldn't finish it... The First Class Host thought something was wrong with it and gave me one to take away with me... I ate it, but it took about 8 attempts.

I'm going to stop my rant for fear that I won't stop ranting...!

How are you Vienna?? and everyone else?? :hugs: to all I have to catch a train now so I'll sign on when I get home... If anyone wants a chat then PM me

BF
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death.drop
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#9856
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#9856
i've been looking at citizens advice about work and i'm definitely going down there, after a quick look at employment rights here are a list of things the hotel are doing wrong/illegally
-discrimination against disability.
-discrimination against age
-exceeding the maximum hours a week an employee can work
-not giving employees 11 hours consecutive rest a day
-most staff have no contract, even when requested
-hiring new staff and taking away hours from existing ones on the grounds they don't have enough work for them.
-laws regarding heavy lifting and chemicals
-minimum wage laws
-changing the terms of 'custom and practice contracts'
-threaten people if they have sick days

I'm so pissed off with the place. talking to phil about all this on sunday.
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death.drop
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#9857
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#9857
(Original post by blackfish)
Pretty awful... Alot of **** has happened, so far, July's events were:

Assaulted Twice
Had a £300 phone stolen
Received Abusive Phone Calls from someone who I would have called my friend
Nearly lost my job because the train was late 3 times
Had a rather large phone bill because the mobile phone company stuffed up...! But thats been sorted
My Ex was giving me grief that I never text her
Moved House
Developed an Eating Problem

I'll stop there before I start crying...

I feel completely and utterly worn... I sometimes wonder how long it's going to be before I have a complete breakdown...! My head is killing me from where I was assaulted, I am suffering from short term memory loss and things are getting quite serious because I have made a few critical errors recently... Like forget passwords to servers... I never forget passwords ever!

I can't eat anything...! I knew myself something wasn't right when I didn't finish my mums Sunday Lunch, I never not finish Sunday Lunch... Thems the rules Then I had a complimentary salad and cheese roll on the train, again, I couldn't finish it... The First Class Host thought something was wrong with it and gave me one to take away with me... I ate it, but it took about 8 attempts.

I'm going to stop my rant for fear that I won't stop ranting...!

How are you Vienna?? and everyone else?? :hugs: to all I have to catch a train now so I'll sign on when I get home... If anyone wants a chat then PM me

BF
*hugs*
have you considered taking a holiday? even if it's just camping somewhere for a few days. the stress of everything could be what's affecting your eating and getting away from it could help to get you back on track. I imagine it would be good for you to get out of the environment as well, I know it's only a short term thing but it gives you time to recover, move you a few steps away from a break down.
Stress affects physical healing as well, and the outdoors apparently helps it so regarding the injuries a holiday might be quite helpful too!
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Vienna Cannon
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#9858
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#9858
(Original post by blackfish)
Pretty awful... Alot of **** has happened, so far, July's events were:

Assaulted Twice
Had a £300 phone stolen
Received Abusive Phone Calls from someone who I would have called my friend
Nearly lost my job because the train was late 3 times
Had a rather large phone bill because the mobile phone company stuffed up...! But thats been sorted
My Ex was giving me grief that I never text her
Moved House
Developed an Eating Problem

I'll stop there before I start crying...

I feel completely and utterly worn... I sometimes wonder how long it's going to be before I have a complete breakdown...! My head is killing me from where I was assaulted, I am suffering from short term memory loss and things are getting quite serious because I have made a few critical errors recently... Like forget passwords to servers... I never forget passwords ever!

I can't eat anything...! I knew myself something wasn't right when I didn't finish my mums Sunday Lunch, I never not finish Sunday Lunch... Thems the rules Then I had a complimentary salad and cheese roll on the train, again, I couldn't finish it... The First Class Host thought something was wrong with it and gave me one to take away with me... I ate it, but it took about 8 attempts.

I'm going to stop my rant for fear that I won't stop ranting...!

How are you Vienna?? and everyone else?? :hugs: to all I have to catch a train now so I'll sign on when I get home... If anyone wants a chat then PM me

BF
:hugs: that sounds really awful. I am sorry you had such a bad month but hopefully things will pick up for you :hugs:
to be honest I am feeling pretty low right now I hate myself right now for letting my past get to me when i shouldn't. I should be over what happened to me and I hate myself for being so weak, if i was stronger I should be fine with what had happened to me.
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death.drop
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#9859
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#9859
(Original post by Vienna Cannon)
to be honest I am feeling pretty low right now I hate myself right now for letting my past get to me when i shouldn't. I should be over what happened to me and I hate myself for being so weak, if i was stronger I should be fine with what had happened to me.
I know the feeling, which is weird because whenever you say things like this I always think you're really putting yourself down and you should realise it takes time for people to get over stuff like that, you've been through a lot and yeah, it will affect you in some way for the rest of your life but it's like anything, a first kiss or an amazing friend will affect you forever, and you'll think about it from time to time. It doesn't make you weak for something life changing to affect you. it makes you human.
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jonathan122
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#9860
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#9860
(Original post by blackfish)
Pretty awful... Alot of **** has happened, so far, July's events were:

Assaulted Twice
Had a £300 phone stolen
Received Abusive Phone Calls from someone who I would have called my friend
Nearly lost my job because the train was late 3 times
Had a rather large phone bill because the mobile phone company stuffed up...! But thats been sorted
My Ex was giving me grief that I never text her
Moved House
Developed an Eating Problem

I'll stop there before I start crying...

I feel completely and utterly worn... I sometimes wonder how long it's going to be before I have a complete breakdown...! My head is killing me from where I was assaulted, I am suffering from short term memory loss and things are getting quite serious because I have made a few critical errors recently... Like forget passwords to servers... I never forget passwords ever!

I can't eat anything...! I knew myself something wasn't right when I didn't finish my mums Sunday Lunch, I never not finish Sunday Lunch... Thems the rules Then I had a complimentary salad and cheese roll on the train, again, I couldn't finish it... The First Class Host thought something was wrong with it and gave me one to take away with me... I ate it, but it took about 8 attempts.

I'm going to stop my rant for fear that I won't stop ranting...!

How are you Vienna?? and everyone else?? :hugs: to all I have to catch a train now so I'll sign on when I get home... If anyone wants a chat then PM me

BF
Did you go to the doctors to get your head checked after you were assaulted? If not it might be worth popping along to make sure everything's ok. :hugs:
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