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    (Original post by the bear)
    The first recorded European sighting of the Australian mainland, and the first recorded European landfall on the Australian continent, are attributed to the Dutch navigator Willem Janszoon. He sighted the coast of Cape York Peninsula in early 1606, and made landfall on 26 February at the Pennefather River near the modern town of Weipa on Cape York. The Dutch charted the whole of the western and northern coastlines and named the island continent "New Holland" during the 17th century, but made no attempt at settlement. William Dampier, an English explorer and privateer, landed on the north-west coast of New Holland in 1688 and again in 1699 on a return trip. In 1770, James Cook sailed along and mapped the east coast, which he named New South Wales and claimed for Great Britain. With the loss of its American colonies in 1780, the British Government sent a fleet of ships, the "First Fleet", under the command of Captain Arthur Phillip, to establish a new penal colony in New South Wales. A camp was set up and the flag raised at Sydney Cove, Port Jackson, on 26 January 1788,[14] a date which became Australia's national day, Australia Day although the British Crown Colony of New South Wales was not formally promulgated until 7 February 1788. The first settlement led to the foundation of Sydney, the establishment of farming, industry and commerce; and the exploration and settlement of other regions.
    You missed a citation.
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    (Original post by Tortious)
    You missed a citation.
    she'll be apples mate
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    (Original post by the bear)
    she'll be apples mate
    Sorry, the reference is lost on me... :lolwut:
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    (Original post by Tortious)
    Sorry, the reference is lost on me... :lolwut:
    Fair suck of the sav cobber !
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    i am totally lost the plot with this story at the moment can someone please fill me in, as well as up dating me
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    (Original post by sharkbate633)
    i am totally lost the plot with this story at the moment can someone please fill me in, as well as up dating me
    plot summary:

    Ben has angered Mr Changeable by throwing him into a heap of dog poo.

    Mr Changeable vows revenge via Karen's lady doll Roxie, with whom he had a brief flirtation when he was in the army.
    After being jilted by Roxie he left the army and became a busker in Australia where we last saw him in Fish Creek Victoria.
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    thanks, i didn't know that karen had kept one of her old toys until i read the bit that first introduced her old doll roxie
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    (Original post by the bear)
    Fair suck of the sav cobber !
    Ah, no! I didn't mean it "negatively" - I just meant I'm not sure who else has cottoned on and I didn't want the magic of your storytelling to be undermined. :beard:
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    One day while Mr Changeable was busking in the shade of a coolabar tree a powerful sports car pulled up. It was a 1961 E-type jaguar; 1961 Jaguar E-Type Specifications - Specs

    engine Inline-6
    valvetrain DOHC
    displacement 3781 cc / 230.7 cu in
    bore 87 mm / 3.43 in
    stroke 106 mm / 4.17 in
    compression 9.0:1
    power 197.6 kw / 265.0 bhp @ 5500 rpm
    hp per litre 70.09 bhp per litre
    bhp/weight
    torque 352.5 nm / 260.0 ft lbs @ 4000 rpm
    drive wheels Front Engine / RWD
    body / frame Unit Steel
    front brakes Dunlop Discs w/Servo Assist
    f brake size 279 mm / 11.0 in
    rear brakes Dunlop Discs w/Servo Assist
    r brake size 254 mm / 10.0 in
    front wheels F 38.1 x 15.2 cm / 15.0 x 6.0 in
    rear wheels R 38.1 x 16.5 cm / 15.0 x 6.5 in
    steering Rack & Pinion
    weight 1234 kg / 2721 lbs
    wheelbase 2464 mm / 97.0 in
    front track 1270 mm / 50.0 in
    rear track 1270 mm / 50.0 in
    length 4453 mm / 175.3 in
    width 1656 mm / 65.2 in
    height 1222 mm / 48.1 in
    transmission 4-Speed Manual
    gear ratios 3.377:1, 1.860:1, 1.283:1, 1.00:1
    top speed 241.4 kph / 150.0 mph
    0 - 60 mph 7.0 seconds
    0 - 100 mph 16.0 seconds
    0 - 1/4 mile 14.8 seconds

    Mr Changeable's gaze briefly caressed the sensual contours of the iconic British motor; then he saw that the passenger was none other than Roxie. It was impossible to miss the huge engagement ring on her left hand.
    The exquisite Marquise cut solitaire diamond was at least 8 carats he estimated. Dating back to the time of Louis XV, the marquise shape’s elongated profile makes a dramatic statement on the hand.It sparkled enticingly in the Australian sunshine. The platinum mounted gem would not have given much change from £100000.
    A large figure blotted out the sunshine. Mr Changeable shielded his eyes with his left hand. His bassoon dangled from the right, all thoughts of busking abandoned. "Well we meet again, erm, cobber" said the familiar voice. "Glad to see you are making something of your life". Surely there was a hint of sarcasm in the well-bred tones.
    It was of course Rupert, the Colonel of the regiment which Mr Changeable had left following that terrible night so many years ago.
    "Roxie and i are touring the East Coast before getting married in Bali. Sort of a pre-honeymoon if you will." The annoying voice broke into smug laughter at its owner's splendid sense of humour.
    "Here Sgt this is for you". A screwed up $5 bill landed in the dust at Mr Changeable's feet.
    Roxie lifted her Cartier sunglasses. Most Cartier products have elegant look when they are used. People usually wear these sunglasses because they want to improve their overall appearances by wearing these sunglasses. Nowadays, sunglasses do not only function as the eye protection. Some people may use sunglasses as parts of their fashion styles. It is very important to choose the best product that can improve the overall look of your appearance. These sunglasses can be perfect options for people who love having good fashion styles.
    This is another benefit that you can get by wearing Cartier sunglasses. Most products from Cartier are specially designed from high quality materials. The materials are specially chosen to produce high quality and durable products. Because of that reason, most sunglasses from this brand can last for several years without being damaged. The material for these sunglasses is very strong and durable to any extreme conditions. These sunglasses are very easy to clean and maintain.
    This is another function of these Cartier sunglasses. They are very effective to protect your eyes from sunlight. These products can also be used to protect your eyes from excessive UV lights. UV light can be very dangerous for your eyes because it can damage your eyes’ function. All sunglasses from Cartier are specially designed with high quality materials that can filter any UV lights coming to your eyes.
    Mr Changeable felt a magnetic pull to those limpid blue eyes. It was as if they had parted yesterday rather than a decade ago. Roxie's smooth plastic skin seemed immune to the signs of ageing. His own tough carapace bore the signs of years of busking in the fierce Antipodean sunlight.
    Suddenly she snapped the sunglasses back down and looked away. She waved an elegant gloved forearm and then the jaguar roared in to life and the happy couple sped away in the direction of Melbourne.
    Mr Changeable fell to his knees. He had been living a lie for so long. Now it was time for action.

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    The next day Mr Changeable hitch hiked into Melbourne. He sold his bassoon at a pawn shop. He had managed to save just over $1000 from his busking takings. Now he had just enough money for a one way ticket back to England. He boarded the plane a few days later, still wearing his boardshorts and vest. His only luggage was a carrier bag containing his medals and a goodly selection of stubbies.
    Most bottled beer in Australia is sold in either 375 mL (Stubby) or 750 mL (Long Neck) sizes. Carlton United briefly "upsized" to 800 mL; however, this has since been reduced to the original 750 mL. Bottle sizes of 330 mL (and to a lesser extent 345 mL and 355 mL) are becoming increasingly common, particularly among microbreweries. In the Northern Territory, the once-common "Darwin Stubby", a large (2.0-litre) bottle, is now sold largely as a tourist gimmick, but very successfully. Most bottles are lightweight "single use only", though some are still reusable, and in some cases (e.g. Coopers 750 ml), breweries are reintroducing refillable bottles. In South Australia, container deposits on beer bottles and some other types of beverage containers support a well established network of recycling centres, providing significant environmental benefits as well as generating employment opportunities for unskilled workers.
    Mr Changeable spent the long flight drinking and ogling the air hostesses. He made the most of the free in-flight beverages as well as his stubbies so by the time the Boeing Dreamliner landed at Heathrow he was feeling very mellow indeed.
    Brief Description:
    The Boeing 787-8 Dreamliner is a superefficient airplane with new passenger-pleasing features. It will bring the economics of large jet transports to the middle of the market, using 20 percent less fuel than any other airplane of its size.
    Seating:
    210 to 250 passengers
    Range:
    7,650 to 8,200 nautical miles (14,200 to 15,200 kilometers)
    Configuration:
    Twin aisle
    Cross Section:
    226 inches (574 centimeters)
    Wing Span:
    197 feet (60 meters)
    Length:
    186 feet (57 meters)
    Height:
    56 feet (17 meters)
    Cruise Speed:
    Mach 0.85
    Total Cargo Volume:
    4,400 cubic feet
    Maximum Takeoff Weight:
    502,500 pounds (227,930 kilograms)
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    if memomeomoeomtoo is the next one to read an or reply to this then can she please continue my new story called toddler falling over form the bit where i have left off
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    sorry sharkbate, i cannot fulfill your demands due to exams
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    Mr Changeable remembered that Roxie had mentioned South Norwood during that magical, tragical evening a decade previously. Her owner was called Sharon or something similar and worked as a computer hacker.
    He changed his remaining Australian dollars into sterling at a backstreet Bureau de Change. The Asian guy behind the counter winked at him and asked if he needed any female company. Mr Changeable stared balefully at him and said "I have come to find the woman of my dreams. Fair suck of the sav."
    He hailed a taxi and was soon heading to South Norwood. He did not want to risk the tube. There were so many stories about plastic adventure heroes who disappeared after boarding Underground trains.
    After half an hour they reached South Norwood Country Park. The cabbie said "That will be £185.60 squire". Mr Changeable could not believe his ears. He only had £39.24 left in his wallet. He ran through the possibilities. The doors of the cab were locked so he could not do a runner... he could ask the cabbie for a discount; this did not seem a very fruitful avenue to explore. So it was option three. "You must get awfully lonely driving your cab all day. Your shoulders look very tense. How about i give you a special massage ? I only charge £146.36 for cab-drivers"
    And so an hour later Mr Changeable emerged from the bushes behind the cricket pavilion somewhat the worse for wear. Clive the cabbie had been quite a handful.
    It was starting to get dark in the Park. Mr Changeable did not know Karen's address, only that she always came to the park every morning for a jog. He would lie up for the night and intercept Karen and hopefully Roxie as they passed the Duck Pond.
    Covering himself in fallen leaves Mr Changeable spent an uncomfortable night under a blackberry bush overlooking the jogging path by the duck pond. He had a strange dream featuring Clive as a giant hamster who accused him of stealing his food. As the grey dawn broke over the mean streets of South Norwood Mr Changeable heard the sound of running footsteps. Hastily he peered out of his hide. A young woman was approaching from the direction of Elmers End railway station.
    Elmers End station is a railway station and tram terminus in Elmers End, South London, England. It is in the London Borough of Bromley, and Travelcard Zone 4 17 km (11 mi) south of London Charing Cross.
    The railway through Elmers End was opened by the South Eastern Railway on 1 April 1864 as an extension of the Mid-Kent Line from New Beckenham to Addiscombe; there was a branch, opened on 29 May 1882 to Hayes at this station. The portion of the line to Addiscombe, which was originally named Croydon (Addiscombe Road), was closed in 1997 when Tramlink took over much of the trackbed from Elmers End.
    As she drew level with the blackberry bush she stopped and looked furtively around. To Mr Changeable's astonishment she stepped off the path and nipped behind the bush. There she quickly removed her designer jogging suit and trainers.
    Then she re-emerged and jumped into the pond from the small wooden jetty where people liked to feed the ducks. Mr Changeable furtively examined the garments and found a label sewn into her designer pants with her name; Karen Ponsonby.
    Mr Changeable noticed that Karen had chosen Smarty Pants sports underwear. Smarty Pants underwear are lightweight, non-binding and anti-microbial. Flat lock stitching provides a durable, no bulk fit and the breathable gusset is double layered. Stylish Smarty Pants features a lower waist in a high performance, yet easy-to-care for fabric.
    In the pocket of her jogging trousers he located her wallet and on her driving licence read her address: 33 Gravel Hill South Norwood. There was no sign of Roxie however. Presumably she was still at home.
    Karen was enjoying her swim and looked forward to a hearty breakfast at the Happy Eater on her way home. A traditional full English breakfast includes bacon (traditionally back bacon), poached or fried eggs, fried or grilled tomatoes, fried mushrooms, fried bread or toast with butter, sausages and baked beans, usually served with a mug of tea. As nearly everything is fried in this meal, it is commonly called a "fry-up".
    Black pudding is often added, as are fried leftover mashed potatoes (called potato cakes) or hash browns. Originally a way to use up leftover vegetables from the main meal of the day before, bubble and squeak, shallow-fried leftover vegetables with potato, has become a breakfast feature in its own right. Onions, either fried or in rings, occasionally appear. In the North Midlands, fried or grilled oatcakes sometimes replace fried bread. When an English breakfast is ordered to contain everything available it is often referred to as a Full English, or a Full Monty.
    Mr Changeable watched as she emerged from the murky water and dressed a few feet away from him. Mr Changeable was not an expert on childbearing but even he could see that Karen was in the family way. She was glowing with health and seemed very happy. If only she had brought Roxie with her... Mr Changeable was even more determined to rescue his plastic idol from the clutches of the evil Rupert.
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    Karen shook her damp locks in the grey early morning light. The swim had been particularly bracing that morning. She gently rubbed her tummy and said "how are we doing little man ?" Suddenly she felt an urgent need to pee and loosed a steaming golden jet into a pile of dead leaves at the edge of the blackberry bush. To her surprise a small figure popped up from the leaves and swore at her in a strong Australian accent "Oi Sheila ! If your brains were made of elastic you wouldn't make a set of garters for a one- legged budgie"
    Karen was not sure if she should be embarrassed or amused by this 8" Antipodean. "Do you often spy on ladies getting undressed ?" she asked him."You ain't not lady Sheila". "My name is not Sheila, it is Karen. And you are ?" "They just call me Mr Changeable.Pleased to meet ya Karen. Sorry about, you know, seeing your bits and all" "Well these things happen Mr um Changeable. I am just on my way to have a Full English Breakfast at the Happy Eater if you would care to join me." "Fair dinkum, you are a bonzer Pommie" replied Mr Changeable. Karen was not sure exactly what he meant but assumed that he was accepting her invitation. She finished dressing and picked up the sweary plastic chap. After wiping the remaining drops of wee from his sunburnt torso she tucked him under her arm and jogged towards the entrance of the park.

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    (Original post by memomemootoo)
    sorry sharkbate, i cannot fulfill your demands due to exams
    may be afterwards then also it was the bear that suggested that you should continue
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    (Original post by sharkbate633)
    may be afterwards then also it was the bear that suggested that you should continue
    memomomomtomeotoo is the most talented of us, but notoriously reclusive.
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    Karen kept up a steady pace past Elmers End station and then uphill towards the Cemetery and Crematorium. By now the rush hour traffic was beginning to build. Several oafs in white vans called out coarse remarks to Karen but she just ignored them. Mr Changeable swore at the shaven-headed dirtbags in fluent Australian. After half a mile she slowed down and asked her passenger if he was OK. He said he was fine and looking forward to breakfast. The Happy Eater was visible a few hundred yards ahead and soon they were ensconced at one of the fine formica tables. A teenage waitress approached and asked them for their order. She wore a namebadge on her left breast. Pat.
    Mr Changeable needed no further encouragement and prodded the waitress' boobie with his plastic hand. She screamed and ran into the kitchen. Karen grabbed Mr Changeable and dashed out of the restaurant before the manager could reach their table.
    "Mr Changeable that may be acceptable behaviour in Australia, but over here it is not tolerated." "Ah c'mon Sheila it was just a bit of fun. I am sure that was not the first time someone accepted her invitation !"

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    (Original post by sharkbate633)
    may be afterwards then also it was the bear that suggested that you should continue
    maybe ..also i'm very pleased that you've learnt how to quote

    (Original post by the bear)
    memomomomtomeotoo is the most talented of us, but notoriously reclusive.
    nah i aint.. you're the most talented of us all bro
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    Karen ran madly away from the restaurant, for all the world as if a bunyip were on her tail.

    The bunyip is a large semi-mythical creature from Aboriginal culture, said to lurk in swamps, billabongs, creeks, riverbeds, and waterholes. The origin of the word bunyip has been traced to the Wemba-Wemba or Wergaia language of Aboriginal people of South-Eastern Australia.However, the bunyip appears to have formed part of traditional Aboriginal beliefs and stories throughout Australia, although its name varied according to tribal nomenclature. In his 2001 book, writer Robert Holden identified at least nine regional variations for the creature known as the bunyip across Aboriginal Australia. Various written accounts of bunyips were made by Europeans in the early and mid-19th century, as settlement spread across the country.

    Descriptions of bunyips vary widely. George French Angus may have collected a description of a bunyip in his account of a "water spirit" from the Moorundi people of the Murray River before 1847, stating it is "much dreaded by them… It inhabits the Murray; but…they have some difficulty describing it. Its most usual form…is said to be that of an enormous starfish." Robert Brough Smyth's Aborigines of Victoria of 1878 devoted ten pages to the bunyip, but concluded "in truth little is known among the blacks respecting its form, covering or habits; they appear to have been in such dread of it as to have been unable to take note of its characteristics." However, common features in many 19th-century newspaper accounts include a dog-like face, dark fur, a horse-like tail, flippers, and walrus-like tusks or horns or a duck-like bill.
    The Challicum bunyip, an outline image of a bunyip carved by Aborigines into the bank of Fiery Creek, near Ararat, Victoria, was first recorded by The Australasian newspaper in 1851. According to the report, the bunyip had been speared after killing an Aboriginal man. Antiquarian Reynell Johns claimed that until the mid-1850s, Aboriginal people made a "habit of visiting the place annually and retracing the outlines of the figure [of the bunyip] which is about 11 paces long and 4 paces in extreme breadth."

    Mr Changeable had never actually seen a bunyip but he had heard the rumours whilst sharing a cabin on the outskirts of Fish Creek with Two Trousers George, an ancient Aboriginal tracker who had fallen on hard times. Many a winter's night had been passed listening to the old fella's tales of the Outback and the creatures which dwelt therein. The stories became more interesting when George had partaken of his favourite brew, Orlando sweet sherry. Mr Changeable would bring several litres of the potent fluid back from the bottle shop to lubricate the wordsmith.
    Once Two Trousers had managed to produce a piece of art on Eucalyptus bark depicting a bunyip. It seemed not unlike an obese retriever with long fangs and a platypus' tail. George swore that it had chased him down a billabong where he was fishing for Murray Cod.

    Karen stopped, panting, and gasped "Here we are. Home sweet home." She opened the door of a ground floor flat in a 1920s Art Deco block.

    Art Deco is an influential visual arts design style which first appeared in France during the 1920s, flourished internationally during the 30s and 40s, then waned in the post-World War II era. It is an eclectic style that combines traditional craft motifs with Machine Age imagery and materials. The style is often characterized by rich colors, bold geometric shapes, and lavish ornamentation.
    Deco emerged from the Interwar period when rapid industrialization was transforming culture. One of its major attributes is an embrace of technology. This distinguishes Deco from the organic motifs favored by its predecessor Art Nouveau.
    Historian Bevis Hillier defined Art Deco as "an assertively modern style...[that] ran to symmetry rather than asymmetry, and to the rectilinear rather than the curvilinear; it responded to the demands of the machine and of new material...[and] the requirements of mass production."
    During its heyday Art Deco represented luxury, glamour, exuberance, and faith in social and technological progress.

    During the 1930s, art deco had a noticeable effect on house design in the United Kingdom, as well as the design of various public buildings. Straight, white-rendered house frontages rising to flat roofs, sharply geometric door surrounds and tall windows, as well as convex-curved metal corner windows, were all characteristic of that period.
    In London, the former Arsenal Stadium has the famous East Stand facade. It remains at the Arsenal football club's old home at Highbury, London Borough of Islington, which was vacated in the summer of 2006. Opened in October 1936, the structure now has Grade II listed status and has been converted into apartments. William Bennie, the organizer of the project, famously used the art deco style in the final design which was considered one of the most opulent and impressive stands of world football. The London Underground is also famous for many examples of art deco architecture. Du Cane Court, in Balham, south-west London, is a good example of the art deco style. It was reckoned to be possibly the largest block of privately owned apartments under one roof in Britain at the time it was built, and the first to employ pre-stressed concrete. It has a grand reception area and is surrounded by Japanese-style gardens; and it has had many famous residents, especially from the performing arts. Elsewhere in south-west London, is the famous Battersea Power Station, which has appeared in films and artwork including the cover of Pink Floyd's 1977 album Animals (Pink Floyd album). Partially built in the 1930s, the building retains its powerful Art Deco facade.
    In North West England, the buildings and structures related to the Queensway Tunnel which connects Liverpool and Birkenhead are distinctly Art Deco. Other notable Art Deco buildings in Liverpool include Philharmonic Hall and the former terminal building at Liverpool Airport - now the Crowne Plaza LJLA.

    Karen carefully locked the door behind her and set the alarm system. "I chose Sentinel Security because they offer peace of mind 24/7 at an affordable tarriff. Their professional team are just a phone call away." Mr Changeable was pleased that Karen had taken precautions. It meant that Roxie was well cared for. He wondered how and if he should introduce his plastic inamorata into the conversation given that he was supposed to be a total stranger to Karen and her household.

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    Karen asked Mr Changeable if he would like a cup of tea. Camellia sinensis is an evergreen plant that grows mainly in tropical and subtropical climates.Some varieties can also tolerate marine climates and are cultivated as far north as Pembrokeshire in the British mainland and Washington in the United States.

    Tea plants are propagated from seed and cutting; it takes about 4 to 12 years for a tea plant to bear seed, and about three years before a new plant is ready for harvesting. In addition to a zone 8 climate or warmer, tea plants require at least 127 cm (50 inches) of rainfall a year and prefer acidic soils. Many high-quality tea plants are cultivated at elevations of up to 1,500 m (4,900 ft) above sea level: at these heights, the plants grow more slowly and acquire a better flavour.
    Only the top 1-2 inches of the mature plant are picked. These buds and leaves are called flushes. A plant will grow a new flush every seven to 15 days during the growing season, and leaves that are slow in development tend to produce better-flavoured teas. Pests of tea include mosquito bugs that can tatter leaves, so insecticides may be sprayed; it is important that these be applied judiciously to avoid excessive residues.
    A tea plant will grow into a tree of up to 16 m (52 ft) if left undisturbed, but cultivated plants are pruned to waist height for ease of plucking.
    Two principal varieties are used: the China plant (C. s. sinensis), used for most Chinese, Formosan and Japanese teas (but not Pu-erh); and the clonal Assam tea plant (C. s. assamica), used in most Indian and other teas (but not Darjeeling). Within these botanical varieties, there are many strains and modern Indian clonal varieties. Leaf size is the chief criterion for the classification of tea plants, with three primary classifications being: Assam type, characterised by the largest leaves; China type, characterised by the smallest leaves; and Cambod, characterised by leaves of intermediate size.
    Processing and classification [edit]

    Fresh tea leaves of different sizes: The smaller the leaf, the more expensive the tea.
    Teas can generally be divided into categories based on how they are processed. There are at least six different types of tea: white, yellow, green, oolong (or wulong), black (called red tea in China), and post-fermented tea (or black tea for the Chinese) of which the most commonly found on the market are white, green, oolong, and black. Some varieties, such as traditional oolong tea and Pu-erh tea, a post-fermented tea, can be used medicinally.
    After picking, the leaves of C. sinensis soon begin to wilt and oxidise, unless they are immediately dried. The leaves turn progressively darker as their chlorophyll breaks down and tannins are released. This enzymatic oxidation process, known as fermentation in the tea industry, is caused by the plant's intracellular enzymes and causes the tea to darken. In tea processing, the darkening is stopped at a predetermined stage by heating, which deactivates the enzymes responsible. In the production of black teas, the halting of oxidisation by heating is carried out simultaneously with drying.

    Without careful moisture and temperature control during manufacture and packaging, the tea may become unfit for consumption, due to the growth of undesired molds and bacteria. At minimum, it will make the taste unpleasant.

    Fortunately Karen's beverage did not contain undesired molds and bacteria; it was pleasantly refreshing. Mr Changeable also accepted a biscuit. He chose Lemon Puffs; although they sounded vaguely unmanly he enjoyed the subtle stickiness and the gorgeous citrus tang.
    Biscuits today can be savoury or sweet, but most are small at around 5 cm (2.0 in) in diameter, and flat. The term biscuit also applies to sandwich-type biscuits, wherein a layer of "creme" or icing is sandwiched between two biscuits, such as the custard cream, or a layer of jam (as in biscuits which, in the United Kingdom, are known as "Jammy Dodgers")

    Sweet biscuits are commonly eaten as a snack food, and are, in general, made with wheat flour or oats, and sweetened with sugar or honey. Varieties may contain chocolate, fruit, jam, nuts, or even be used to sandwich other fillings. Usually, a dedicated section for sweet biscuits is found in most European supermarkets.
    In Britain, the digestive biscuit and rich tea have a strong cultural identity as the traditional accompaniment to a cup of tea, and are regularly eaten as such. Many tea drinkers "dunk" their biscuits in tea, allowing them to absorb liquid and soften slightly before consumption.

    Savoury biscuits or crackers (such as cream crackers, water biscuits, oatcakes, or crisp breads) are usually plainer and commonly eaten with cheese following a meal. Other savoury biscuits include the Jewish biscuits known as matzos. Many savoury biscuits also contain additional ingredients for flavour or texture, such as poppy seeds, onion or onion seeds, cheese (such as cheese melts), and olives. Savoury biscuits also usually have a dedicated section in most European supermarkets, often in the same aisle as sweet biscuits. The exception to savoury biscuits is the sweetmeal digestive known as the "Hovis biscuit", which, although slightly sweet, is still classified as a cheese biscuit. Savoury biscuits sold in supermarkets are sometimes associated with a certain geographical area, such as Scottish oatcakes or Cornish wafer biscuits.
    In general, Australians, South Africans, New Zealanders, Kenyans, Indians, Pakistanis, Sri Lankans, Singaporeans, and the Irish use the British meaning of "biscuit" for the sweet biscuit. In Australasia, the terms biscuit and cookie are used interchangeably, depending on the region and the speaker, with biscuits usually referring to hard, sweet biscuits (such as digestives, Nice, Bourbon creams, etc.) and cookies for soft baked goods (i.e. chocolate chip cookies). In Canada the term is used more rarely, usually with imported brands of biscuits or in the Maritimes. Two famous Australasian biscuit varieties are the ANZAC biscuit and the Tim Tam. This sense is at the root of the name of the United States' most prominent maker of cookies and crackers, the National Biscuit Company, now called Nabisco.

    Biscuits and gravy is a popular breakfast dish in much of North America, especially in the Southern United States. It consists of soft, unsweetened dough biscuits covered in thick "country," "sausage," or "white" gravy, also known as sawmill gravy, made from the drippings of cooked pork sausage, white flour, milk, and often (but not always) bits of sausage, bacon, ground beef, or other meat. The gravy is often flavored with black pepper.

    "It looks as though you will be staying here for a while Mr Changeable" said Karen, crossing her elegant legs. "Please call me Geoff " he said. It was not his name but it felt the right thing to say. "OK, erm, Geoff. Although as you have seen I have a top of the range alarm system with full biometrics I would prefer to have a man on the premises when I go to work during the day. Roxie needs someone to protect her until her husband returns from Afghanistan". Mr Changeable's plastic heart skipped a beat but he pretended otherwise. "Is this lady a relative of yours ? Your sister perhaps ?" "No silly. Roxie is a plastic replicant just like you. I have had her since she was tiny. Recently she married her Army sweetheart Rupert". Mr Changeable fought back the urge to vomit. "And, erm, Robert is now in Iraq you say ?" "Rupert is in Afghanistan" replied Karen with a hint of tetchiness.
    "That must be very worrying for Rosie. So many of our brave lads come home in boxes""Roxie tries to keep up a brave face but she is worried sick about Rupert" Karen answered sadly. "So it would be marvellous if you were here as a plastic shoulder for her to cry on when things get too much. Would you be able to do this for me ?" Mr Changeable pretended to weight the pros and cons for a few seconds, stroking his blunt plastic chin. "I am not one of those metrosexual type of guys who is always banging on about their emotions but i guess anyone would be better than no-one under the circs" he bluffly replied.
    "Well that's settled then. Roxie is having a nap at the moment so I will wait until she wakes up then we can do the introductions"
    Mr Changeable could hardly control his excitement. Just a few short minutes and he would be in the presence of the love of his life. So much depended on Roxie's initial reaction. Perhaps she would not immediately recognize him. They had only met twice; at the Regimental Ball ten years previously, and in Fish Creek the previous month. Mr Changeable had grown a stubbly beard since then... perhaps that would do the trick.

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