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I'm 16, he's 36.. AMA! watch

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    What you said about celebrities being in age gap relationships and being happy was probably the most naive thing I ever read. It actually made me gag a little bit . Do you really think they're an accurate cross section of wider society? And how tf do you know they're happy?
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    (Original post by Yoloswag420)
    Assuming they got married and what not, had kids at like 25 her age so he would be 45, 20 years on chances of death are quite high leaving a 45 year old woman as a widow with two kids have more sense its pretty obvious that it's impended to not work out so what's the point encouraging it when in reality you're adding fire to the fuel
    1) Or maybe if he looks after himself he could live to a ripe old age eg 90, leaving a 70 yr old widow and adult children. How exactly is it different to the risk of marrying someone his own age and unfortunately dying aged 45-50? It happens.

    2) Plenty of single mothers who had kids with some ******* who didn't stick around, leaving the same effect. She could remarry if she wanted, point is the situation is the same but at least their intentions going into it were a long lasting relationship.

    I'm not saying I'd act the same way as OP or the guy in question, I'd rather be in a relationship with someone around my own age... I'm just saying that it should be up to them, it's not obvious whether they'd break up or not.
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    (Original post by TykeDragon)
    1) Or maybe if he looks after himself he could live to a ripe old age eg 90, leaving a 70 yr old widow and adult children. How exactly is it different to the risk of marrying someone his own age and unfortunately dying aged 45-50? It happens.

    2) Plenty of single mothers who had kids with some ******* who didn't stick around, leaving the same effect. She could remarry if she wanted, point is the situation is the same but at least their intentions going into it were a long lasting relationship.

    I'm not saying I'd act the same way as OP or the guy in question, I'd rather be in a relationship with someone around my own age... I'm just saying that it should be up to them, it's not obvious whether they'd break up or not.
    Rather than coming out with far from theories think realistically in there case the likelihood of them having a proper relationship is pretty much nil due to her lack of understanding of the wider world and the fact he's 36 in itself. Your comment is quite dull when taking into consideration that you base it as if not necessarily saying it's wrong but it's plain dumb that a relationship of this sort would even start. I would advise you to wise up because you're talking as if you think it could possibly work, try actually considering the situation realistically rather than having a optimistic view of things
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    (Original post by binkierose)
    Oh no! I meant when both people are legal! Of course it's not the same when someones not of age! I've been told by many people, including therapists, police, teachers, etc that I am really, really mature for my age and am responsible enough to make decisions like this - that's all due to my childhood though c:
    16 year old girls hardly ever think they're mature for their age so this should really assuage everyone's concerns :yy:
    (Original post by TykeDragon)
    Plenty of hypocrites in this thread tbh, what teenage guy hasn't fantasised about celebrities, teachers etc who are in their late 20s and 30s? (before people say 'yeah but that's for one offs, not a relationship'... you'd be saying exactly the same stuff about this being creepy if the thread title had been 'i'm 16 yr old and banging a 36 yr old, AMA' !)
    No, the difference isn't that it's a one off, it's that fantasies aren't reality, and the one sided fantasies don't rely on the older celebrities being weird enough to actually fulfil them. When you're an adult you start to realise that it takes a certain kind of adult to hang out with a 16 year old, let alone date her. OP doesn't know this because she isn't an adult and has no real context for how normal adults act around each other, except for the sanitized versions of themselves her authority figures present. The same does not apply to a 60 year old and a 40 year old, by the way, because the 40 year old has probably spent a lot of their adult life interacting with people 20 years older as equals. Even a 25 and 45 year old can say this. A 16 year old and a 36 year old is completely different.
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    (Original post by Yoloswag420)
    Rather than coming out with far from theories think realistically in there case the likelihood of them having a proper relationship is pretty much nil due to her lack of understanding of the wider world and the fact he's 36 in itself. Your comment is quite dull when taking into consideration that you base it as if not necessarily saying it's wrong but it's plain dumb that a relationship of this sort would even start. I would advise you to wise up because you're talking as if you think it could possibly work, try actually considering the situation realistically rather than having a optimistic view of things
    I think I can tell for myself whether my comments are dull cheers, all I said is to not judge them, they can do whatever they want.

    Also if you learn to read, I wrote that I wasn't making any assessments as to whether I thought their relationship would last, just that if this was what they wanted to do in the meantime, leave them to it.
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    (Original post by TykeDragon)
    I think I can tell for myself whether my comments are dull cheers, all I said is to not judge them, they can do whatever they want.

    Also if you learn to read, I wrote that I wasn't making any assessments as to whether I thought their relationship would last, just that if this was what they wanted to do in the meantime, leave them to it.
    Yes but if you had consideration and to make a difference in a positive away you would rather be truthful not sugar coat the truth. Quite frankly I don't know why you bothered commenting in the first place it's not like you made a difference whereas im trying to open her eyes up to the realism of the situation. So yeah it's good if I tell you your comments are dull.
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    #2

    (Original post by SmashConcept)

    No, the difference isn't that it's a one off, it's that fantasies aren't reality, and the one sided fantasies don't rely on the older celebrities being weird enough to actually fulfil them. When you're an adult you start to realise that it takes a certain kind of adult to hang out with a 16 year old, let alone date her. OP doesn't know this because she isn't an adult and has no real context for how normal adults act around each other, except for the sanitized versions of themselves her authority figures present. The same does not apply to a 60 year old and a 40 year old, by the way, because the 40 year old has probably spent a lot of their adult life interacting with people 20 years older as equals. Even a 25 and 45 year old can say this. A 16 year old and a 36 year old is completely different.

    I appreciate your points, I can definitely see the argument that 16 yr olds and 36 yr olds are quite a different story to 30 and 50 yr olds - that much is obvious as both have the requisite experience to make mature decisions (in theory).

    My argument was not based on 'oh they will work it out and I'm sure they'll last forever,' it was just that we can't say for certain, and their relationship isn't affecting any of us so if it's what they want to do in the meantime, why the hell not?
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    Loool he's the type of guy that will leave you and go for another 16 year old when you're not young anymore - loads of guys like that out there.
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    Do you let him hang around your friends?
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    He doesn't care about you... He's using you for sex
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    #3

    As a 21 year old, this makes me feel better for being attracted a 16 year old. Still cant bring myself to approach her, id feel uncomfortable. :/
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    That is properly, properly, messed up. I wonder if he's done this before? One day they will probably find the bodies in his basement.

    If I was your dad you might find your paedophile boyfriend mysteriously disappeared without trace.
    Crimewatch lookout eh?
    Ive Heard of similar things before and I'm edging my bets that when you turn 18 he will trade you in for a younger model again. Most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. Imagine if you became pregnant to this guy. If he's fishing for, im sorry to say this but, immature girls of 16, I don't think he would have the capacity to front up. There is a reason that this happens and it's probably down to emotional immaturity on his part and being unable to connect with women his own age. If you were my daughter, and yes I am old enough to be your father before we get into that one, I would be making this guy an offer he couldn't refuse!!
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    how did his friends and family react? and if you think this he is your soul mate and will be your life long companion how will you cope when he dies 20 years before you?
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    (Original post by ComputerMaths97)
    Loool he's the type of guy that will leave you and go for another 16 year old when you're not young anymore - loads of guys like that out there.
    Boom! I didn't even read your comment before I posted mine. It's inevitable! I can see tears a plenty coming on very soon!!!
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    You say that you have "been through a lot" together, but as you're only 16 and I assume that must mean you've been together for less than a year, I can only wonder how much you can have been through in that time...
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    (Original post by binkierose)
    Will be more than happy to post some background info on us both too - how we met, etc.

    Seriously though, ask me anything(:
    Jesus, I'm 26, 10 years younger than your partner, and even I cringe at the thought of going out with a 16 year old.

    You want my honest opinion? He's probably using you.
    Of course I expect you to deny this fiercely, and yes there is the possibility that I may be wrong.
    BUT, you must realise there is a possibility that I might be right too.
    Think about it...
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    (Original post by ExRN)
    Crimewatch lookout eh?
    Ive Heard of similar things before and I'm edging my bets that when you turn 18 he will trade you in for a younger model again. Most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. Imagine if you became pregnant to this guy. If he's fishing for, im sorry to say this but, immature girls of 16, I don't think he would have the capacity to front up. There is a reason that this happens and it's probably down to emotional immaturity on his part and being unable to connect with women his own age. If you were my daughter, and yes I am old enough to be your father before we get into that one, I would be making this guy an offer he couldn't refuse!!
    Agree with your first point, he wants youth and is certainly not looking for marriage.

    I disagree with your later point though. A lot of people seem to assume that men who use ptostitues or go for younger girls ECT.. Can't get somebody but that's often not the case. My bet would be that he's probably dated older people normally but probably got dumped or cheated on ECT.. (broken heart) but perhaps remembers his youth when women expected less and were themselves a bit less jaded.

    Its probably similar to when some guys sleep with a hundred girls but will never commit to one. They want to avoid being hurt again.
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    **** all the haters. OP, you seem happy; that is what matters. Some posters crticising you are utter hypocrites(it's worse if they don't realise it, bloody wastemen) and I'm happy it has not crushed your spirit!

    That is all.
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    (Original post by Rakas21)
    Agree with your first point, he wants youth and is certainly not looking for marriage.

    I disagree with your later point though. A lot of people seem to assume that men who use ptostitues or go for younger girls ECT.. Can't get somebody but that's often not the case. My bet would be that he's probably dated older people normally but probably got dumped or cheated on ECT.. (broken heart) but perhaps remembers his youth when women expected less and were themselves a bit less jaded.

    Its probably similar to when some guys sleep with a hundred girls but will never commit to one. They want to avoid being hurt again.
    I don't know man. I am no psychologist but I am slightly younger than this guy in question and it would not only be morally wrong in my opinion to be sleeping with a 16 year old but it would also be wrong on an intellectual level too. Now Im not saying that because she is 16 she too stupid to keep up but what I am getting at is that the guy must be in some way intellectually flawed in some way if he's able to keep on the level of a 16 year old. That's why I would suggest he hasn't been with the "normal" socially acceptable age range. If he is naturally at the capacity of a 16 year old then no mature adult is going to entertain that I wouldnt hsve thought. They met in an arcade...... Maybe that is a normal place to hang out for your average 36 year old man but I know for sure it's not a place that I have frequented much since the age of 15/16. What do I know though? I could be completely wrong and he might be madly in love and have the normal levels of functioning for a man of his age.
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    Lol got groomed
 
 
 
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