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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My 9 to 5, straight edge father. He is usually about as far from alcoholic as one can get. A glass of wine with a meal is the most he would drink and that's when he was with guests. I mean we have liquor in our house that my mum and dad never touch. It's solely for guests.
    Anyway tonight he got home wasted out of his mind. Barely spoke properly and fell asleep on the toilet. My poor mum is devastated and so are my brothers and myself. He even ****** drove home drunk. I mean I can't wrap my mind around that. He's always been rational and calm and collected and an example to everyone. And now this. I just can't imagine what went through his mind as he drank a glass after glass while still sober. I'm sure he'll be an apologetic mess tomorrow but I's scared there's no coming back from this. He really messed up. Not sure if mum will ever forgive him. Anyway, just felt like sharing.
    He got drunk ONCE. Dont you think your all over reacting somewhat?

    (Original post by Nicholas Nelson)
    Talk to him while he's sober, find out why he drinks and explain to him how it makes you feel. best of luck.

    Don't confront him when he's been drinking, that only makes matters worse.
    that would imply he drinks a lot. Except the OP clearly states he came home drunk once.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    ok I'll just keep repeating myself then.
    1. I know my parents had a rough patch a year ago or so but have seemed verz happy in last couple of months and my dad was even more cheerful than usual
    2. He didn't lose his job. Actually it was going well and he was successful in something he worked for for a couple weeks. Would've thought it was a celebratory drink if it wasn't so out of character
    3. I know for a fact he wouldn't kill himself
    4. it's not about the money, it about what it represents. That our loving father doesn't really give a **** about us
    1. In front of the children its been repaired, but if hes acting more cheerful than ever that could suggest hes over compensating and no - not everyone is ok.
    2. Ok
    3. You can never say that. Anyone can go to some very very dark places.
    4. Stop being such a bloody drama queen. He got drunk once.

    Instead of being ready to hang him from the gables, maybe you should look into why it happened and if there is something and if you are such a loving child then maybe having some bloody sympathy
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    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You have made yourself crystal clear and I still maintain my grounds. If someone does something which is highly against their principle then there HAS to be a reason. It doesn't make it right but people don't just wake up and start drinking by 1pm for no good reason. He hasn't said a word because he is probably ashamed especially given the strict moral upbringing he has instilled in you all. What worries me is how you are holding on so tightly to your betrayal and hurt and you cannot seem to realise that those feelings including pride and selfishness are preventing you from acknowledging that something went very wrong with your father last night. It could have been many 'small somethings' that resulted in the showdown yesterday. You have no right to call your father a hypocrite unless you have never buckled under pressure before. If this is a repeated act you can call him a hypocrite but until then, you can choose to show forgiveness, love and support to your father and try to find out what caused his action whether he talks or not or you can choose to hang on to that betrayal and hurt and pain that you feel and let it destroy whatever else you father means to you. The choice is ultimately yours.
    I'm just having trouble accepting that. Even if something like getting fired happened he's just not the type of guy to drown his sorrows in liquor. Maybe nothing did go wrong. Maybe he did just got comfortable with a friend and it got away from him. I just can't imagine what could've gone wrong because things have actually been improving. I got into a great uni, my bro into a great sixth form. Mum got a job that made her happy and my dad seemed happy as well. I know for a fact that his job has been going well. And he's also not the kind of guy to fake happiness, he'd show it if he was unsatisfied with something. I guess we'll talk tomorrow when the dust settles down.
    Anyway, you're right. Your responses have been the most constructive, thanks.
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    #4

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm just having trouble accepting that. Even if something like getting fired happened he's just not the type of guy to drown his sorrows in liquor. Maybe nothing did go wrong. Maybe he did just got comfortable with a friend and it got away from him. I just can't imagine what could've gone wrong because things have actually been improving. I got into a great uni, my bro into a great sixth form. Mum got a job that made her happy and my dad seemed happy as well. I know for a fact that his job has been going well. And he's also not the kind of guy to fake happiness, he'd show it if he was unsatisfied with something. I guess we'll talk tomorrow when the dust settles down.
    Anyway, you're right. Your responses have been the most constructive, thanks.
    You're welcome. Talk to him and maybe you will find the answers you seek. It's okay to feel hurt but you have to let the, go if you want answers. Reading your last post it could very well be that he was in a celebratory mood and got carried away. You have just listed a few positives and milestones that would make anyone celebrate just one of them. He could have felt like finally his efforts have paid off and at the same time, at a loss cus all his achievements mean that he would be less needed now as everyone grows and spread their wings. It could be anything. The only way you will find out is by talking and please don't start make him feel like he did something wrong otherwise he will shut down. You can start by asking him if he will miss you/will be okay when you are off to uni and take it from there and lead into the drinking and only after, will you tell him how you felt, the worry about his endangerment of lives, fear of losing him and remind him the advice he has always given you which caused you to panic when he did the exact opposite. Words like betrayal and hypocrisy should not feature in your conversation. No use shaming him further. Good luck tomorrow.
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    #1

    (Original post by dntknowwhattoput)
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    That's accurate
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    He started drinking at 1pm and you're going on like he's committed atrocities in Anatolia. I hope he does leave you, as you come across as an entitled and spoilt little brat that needs a reality check. Who drinks at 1pm? A stressed out father at his wits end because he's trying his ****ing hardest to provide for his entitled and privileged little child to ensure they always have the best. Count yourself fortunate that your dad stuck around because there's millions of kids out there who's dads didn't.
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    I have no idea what's going on in this thread.

    Just felt like mentioning that.
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    (Original post by SmashConcept)
    I have no idea what's going on in this thread.
    A middle-aged bloke got rat-faced.

    His kid is angry about it.

    Said kid will probably wake up one morning in a few years in a gutter covered in puke and wonder "Where do I live?" then say "Ooh, my head, never again" then go and do it again - but at no point think "Sorry, Dad. I forgot you're human too".
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    (Original post by Mr JB)
    He started drinking at 1pm and you're going on like he's committed atrocities in Anatolia. I hope he does leave you, as you come across as an entitled and spoilt little brat that needs a reality check. Who drinks at 1pm? A stressed out father at his wits end because he's trying his ****ing hardest to provide for his entitled and privileged little child to ensure they always have the best. Count yourself fortunate that your dad stuck around because there's millions of kids out there who's dads didn't.
    We're middle class. Do you call everyone who isn't a starving African child privileged?If I had children and provided for them I'd feel it was my responsibility, not something I choose to do but don't have to.And we have it alright,not the best, we're far from rich, where are these wild assumptions again coming from?Maybe your dad hates his life because he had a child, mine doesn't. Stop projecting your own problems on me.
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    (Original post by Simes)
    A middle-aged bloke got rat-faced.

    His kid is angry about it.

    Said kid will probably wake up one morning in a few years in a gutter covered in puke and wonder "Where do I live?" then say "Ooh, my head, never again" then go and do it again - but at no point think "Sorry, Dad. I forgot you're human too".
    Thanks for ignoring everything I said just to be able to put me down. Way to go. Must be fun around you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Must be fun around you.
    It certainly isn't living with you. What a killjoy.

    Are you old enough to drink in a pub yet?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    We're middle class. Do you call everyone who isn't a starving African child privileged?If I had children and provided for them I'd feel it was my responsibility, not something I choose to do but don't have to.And we have it alright,not the best, we're far from rich, where are these wild assumptions again coming from?Maybe your dad hates his life because he had a child, mine doesn't. Stop projecting your own problems on me.
    My own problems? I come from a stable home with a loving mother and father thanks, unlike yours, whereby your dad is obviously drinking to block out problems that you're too much of an entitled and spoilt prat to see. These aren't assumptions at all. You are making this entire issue about you when its about your dad turning to drink in a time of need. Now you say he doesn't care yet you have no clue as to whether he is keeping something serious from you because he is worried or whatever. Continue to try and make comments about my family if you wish but we're doing just fine thanks. Maybe yours would be doing just fine if you weren't such an entitled brat and showed more compassion towards the father who has catered for your arse for so long, instead of saying he doesn't care. Talk about gratitude.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He doesn't habitually drink. I'm pretty sure this is the first time he got drunk in 20 or so years.
    (Original post by ChickenMadness)
    Maybe he wanted to have a good time lol

    OP why you hatin on a playa?
    Because that playa might be hitting on a mad chicken's female progenitor. That makes OP as mad as your average mad chicken.
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    #1

    (Original post by Mr JB)
    My own problems? I come from a stable home with a loving mother and father thanks, unlike yours, whereby your dad is obviously drinking to block out problems that you're too much of an entitled and spoilt prat to see. These aren't assumptions at all. You are making this entire issue about you when its about your dad turning to drink in a time of need. Now you say he doesn't care yet you have no clue as to whether he is keeping something serious from you because he is worried or whatever. Continue to try and make comments about my family if you wish but we're doing just fine thanks. Maybe yours would be doing just fine if you weren't such an entitled brat and showed more compassion towards the father who has catered for your arse for so long, instead of saying he doesn't care. Talk about gratitude.
    I guessed I touched a nerve and you're desperate to insult. He drank once (as you know but chose to ignore) and as i said things have been going well lately and who are you to assume to know why my father did something? I've always been grateful to my father. I did well in school and got into a good uni and we've celebrated that together just recently.
    I'm making the issue about my brothers, mum and myself. I've been saying "we" the whole time but as I said you chose to ignore that to make it easier to attack me personally.
    How does him putting food on the table automatically make him immune to everything? If he started hitting us would you say "Meh, he's putting food on the table it's alright, don't be ungrateful"
    I feel like insulting you here but I've wasted all insults in this brain dead s*itpool of a thread.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    ....

    How strange, and not a nice thing for you to experience I'm guessing. Sorry if this has already been asked but where was he, was there an occasion or something? And has he said anything about it since?
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    What is wrong with getting drunk once in while?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I guessed I touched a nerve and you're desperate to insult. He drank once (as you know but chose to ignore) and as i said things have been going well lately and who are you to assume to know why my father did something? I've always been grateful to my father. I did well in school and got into a good uni and we've celebrated that together just recently.
    I'm making the issue about my brothers, mum and myself. I've been saying "we" the whole time but as I said you chose to ignore that to make it easier to attack me personally.
    How does him putting food on the table automatically make him immune to everything? If he started hitting us would you say "Meh, he's putting food on the table it's alright, don't be ungrateful"
    I feel like insulting you here but I've wasted all insults in this brain dead s*itpool of a thread.
    Just compared domestic abuse to getting drunk once.... I pray for you :')


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    #1

    (Original post by WannabeDoctor98)
    Just compared domestic abuse to getting drunk once.... I pray for you :'


    Posted from TSR Mobile
    I'm using an extreme example to illustrate a point... do I have to spell that out for you? Your brain is a waste of space.
    • #5
    #5

    If this is upsetting you then you really need to have a talk with your dad.
    Ask him what happened and let him know you'll be there for him.
    He does sound like a hypocrite saying you can't drunk and then he gets drunk himself.
    I guess he had a VERY bad day that day.
    Hopefully it's one off.
    But please speak to him!
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    His side chick is pregnant
 
 
 
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