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Nobody wants to go out with me and I just don't know why watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    sport that I do at uni
    What’s wrong with the guys in the sports clubs?

    through mutual friends
    What kind of friends, and how do they know the guys? E.g. childhood friends + childhood friends = more likely to have more balanced relations vs. uni friends + uni friends = more likely to encounter blokes looking for little besides a cheeky squeeze

    most of the guys tend to be a couple of years younger than me
    I will show a bit of cleavage for example. I do get quite drunk when i go out tbh
    These parts speak for themselves

    very chatty and sociable .. Smiley, fun, up for a laugh
    See more serious/withdrawn guys will tend to be relatively intimidated/put off by these qualities vs. more LADish/outgoing guys will tend to be relatively drawn to them, but primarily on the basis of seeking out ‘party girls’. I’m not for a moment suggesting you should try to be something/someone you’re not – especially where inhibiting/dulling down is concerned, but it’s as well to be aware of this and to try to moderate related behaviours to some extent when you meet someone new whom you would like to take you seriously

    I don't discourage it straight away. I do respond to it. The reason I do is because I think that if i cut it off straight away they are going to get offended and then there's no chance of them liking me
    This is going to sound a bit random but it’s as well to be prepared for sexual bants and to learn how to roll with it in an ‘I’m OK, you’re OK’ positive way that neither turns them off nor gives them the green light to continue quite in the same vein. Complete LADS aside, many guys will operate within the bounds of social acceptability; if you communicate that you are a sexual being, and sexually interested, but also expecting and worthy of respect, and certainly not the kind of girl to get on her back at the click of their fingers, then you’ll find that if guys are interested (enough) they will moderate their behaviour and something approaching balance will be achieved, for a while at least

    All I want is someone who I think is fairly attractive, nice and up for a laugh
    Trouble is (as you will know) many of those blokes who are interested in quality relationships are taken and pursuing them/finding out if they’re available, never mind interested, can be a bit fraught for a girl. Methinks you should perhaps get into the mindset that the bar/club scene is unlikely to yield all too many opportunities to make high quality connections with that type of guy, and expand your horizons. Here’s a list of places to meet new people that I created primarily with males in mind but that you may nevertheless find helpful – please consider that whilst I routinely discourage young men from using it, and favour real life connections in general, online dating can be very worthwhile for young women, particularly now that it's gone mainstream/become less stigmatised
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    #1

    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    What’s wrong with the guys in the sports clubs?

    What kind of friends, and how do they know the guys? E.g. childhood friends + childhood friends = more likely to have more balanced relations vs. uni friends + uni friends = more likely to encounter blokes looking for little besides a cheeky squeeze

    These parts speak for themselves

    See more serious/withdrawn guys will tend to be relatively intimidated/put off by these qualities vs. more LADish/outgoing guys will tend to be relatively drawn to them, but primarily on the basis of seeking out ‘party girls’. I’m not for a moment suggesting you should try to be something/someone you’re not – especially where inhibiting/dulling down is concerned, but it’s as well to be aware of this and to try to moderate related behaviours to some extent when you meet someone new whom you would like to take you seriously

    This is going to sound a bit random but it’s as well to be prepared for sexual bants and to learn how to roll with it in an ‘I’m OK, you’re OK’ positive way that neither turns them off nor gives them the green light to continue quite in the same vein. Complete LADS aside, many guys will operate within the bounds of social acceptability; if you communicate that you are a sexual being, and sexually interested, but also expecting and worthy of respect, and certainly not the kind of girl to get on her back at the click of their fingers, then you’ll find that if guys are interested (enough) they will moderate their behaviour and something approaching balance will be achieved, for a while at least

    Trouble is (as you will know) many of those blokes who are interested in quality relationships are taken and pursuing them/finding out if they’re available, never mind interested, can be a bit fraught for a girl. Methinks you should perhaps get into the mindset that the bar/club scene is unlikely to yield all too many opportunities to make high quality connections with that type of guy, and expand your horizons. Here’s a list of places to meet new people that I created primarily with males in mind but that you may nevertheless find helpful – please consider that whilst I routinely discourage young men from using it, and favour real life connections in general, online dating can be very worthwhile for young women, particularly now that it's gone mainstream/become less stigmatised
    Thank you for your words of wisdom! they are greatly appreciated!

    The guys that I meet through mutual friends at the moment are always of the uni friends + uni friends category.

    I do agree that at social occasions at uni, where quite often drinking and partying is involved, I do come across as a bit of a party girl, and so maybe guys do automatically think of she is just good for one thing when I have that kind of personality.

    I will look through your list as I am sure they will contain some useful suggestions.
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    What’s wrong with the guys in the sports clubs?
    Oh sorry forgot to answer this question. Nothing wrong with the guys in the sport club that I do, apart from the fact that there is only a pool of around 12 guys. So there aren't loads to choose from, and some of them obviously already have relationships. I just don't find many of them attractive, apart from one who is another example of a guy that only seems interested in sex.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Loool. Yeah I get told that a lot by my guy friends, that I'm too soft, like wtf. I don't think im 'soft' at all, just coz i want someone to love ? Pfft. :/

    I study in Bristol.
    I feel you bro
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    What’s wrong with the guys in the sports clubs?

    What kind of friends, and how do they know the guys? E.g. childhood friends + childhood friends = more likely to have more balanced relations vs. uni friends + uni friends = more likely to encounter blokes looking for little besides a cheeky squeeze

    These parts speak for themselves

    See more serious/withdrawn guys will tend to be relatively intimidated/put off by these qualities vs. more LADish/outgoing guys will tend to be relatively drawn to them, but primarily on the basis of seeking out ‘party girls’. I’m not for a moment suggesting you should try to be something/someone you’re not – especially where inhibiting/dulling down is concerned, but it’s as well to be aware of this and to try to moderate related behaviours to some extent when you meet someone new whom you would like to take you seriously

    This is going to sound a bit random but it’s as well to be prepared for sexual bants and to learn how to roll with it in an ‘I’m OK, you’re OK’ positive way that neither turns them off nor gives them the green light to continue quite in the same vein. Complete LADS aside, many guys will operate within the bounds of social acceptability; if you communicate that you are a sexual being, and sexually interested, but also expecting and worthy of respect, and certainly not the kind of girl to get on her back at the click of their fingers, then you’ll find that if guys are interested (enough) they will moderate their behaviour and something approaching balance will be achieved, for a while at least

    Trouble is (as you will know) many of those blokes who are interested in quality relationships are taken and pursuing them/finding out if they’re available, never mind interested, can be a bit fraught for a girl. Methinks you should perhaps get into the mindset that the bar/club scene is unlikely to yield all too many opportunities to make high quality connections with that type of guy, and expand your horizons. Here’s a list of places to meet new people that I created primarily with males in mind but that you may nevertheless find helpful – please consider that whilst I routinely discourage young men from using it, and favour real life connections in general, online dating can be very worthwhile for young women, particularly now that it's gone mainstream/become less stigmatised
    Are you affiliated to In Full Sail by any chance? If not how did you come across it?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you for your words of wisdom! they are greatly appreciated!
    Welcome

    The guys that I meet through mutual friends at the moment are always of the uni friends + uni friends category
    There you go then. The more socially active guys, who have lots of female friends, at uni tend either to be promiscuous, a select few populists/student politics types, gay, or all of the above :mmm:

    I do come across as a bit of a party girl, and so maybe guys do automatically think of she is just good for one thing when I have that kind of personality
    Quite likely that guys of a certain type/age, meeting you in a certain context, with you presenting yourself a certain way, will often make certain (unhelpful) assumptions, aye..

    I will look through your list as I am sure they will contain some useful suggestions
    Jolly good, hope you find it fruitful!

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I just don't find many of them attractive, apart from one who is another example of a guy that only seems interested in sex
    Aye, so sports club’s a bit dry, onto pastures new (unless they have friends who take your fancy)

    (Original post by So Instinct)
    Are you affiliated to In Full Sail by any chance? If not how did you come across it?
    Not quite sure what you mean but it’s just a random metaphor I used as the basis for my site/domain/service name
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Not quite sure what you mean but it’s just a random metaphor I used as the basis for my site/domain/service name
    Sorry, I meant are you connected to it. So is it your blog, someone you know perhaps, if not how did you cross it? Although I think you've just told me it's yours.
 
 
 
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