I know a couple where they both keep their name and both add their spouse's last name.
So let's say her name is Naomi Wittaka and his name is Jake Osceola. Naomi becomes Naomi Wittaka-Osceola and Jake becomes Jake Wittaka-Osceola. =\
My issue is calling a woman Mrs. Jake Osceola. She loses her identity that way. I don't mind hyphenating my own surname with his and probably wouldn't mind him doing the same with mine lol
Should women, married to men, take their husbands last name? Watch
- 22-07-2014 01:31
- 22-07-2014 07:35
All this hyphenating your married name for the most part is just massaging egos and builds up problems.
So what is you daughter or even grandaughter supposed to call themselves?
Using the same standards as their parents they will end up with triple or quadriple hyphanated names.
If you have a rare or unique family name that you dont want to die out I can understand it, but when you have a situation where you have a woman calling herself Mrs Jones-Thomas?
So her daughter marries a Mr Williams, does she become a Jones-Thomas-Williams? Three or four generations later you would have triple hyphanated men marrying quadriple hyphanated women and becoming .......well.......what ever a seven iple hyphenated is.
- 22-07-2014 10:57
No way is the "right" way, other than what is right for each person, and each couple.
Having said that, I do like the Spanish/Hispanic way, of where each couple retains their own double last name, but pass on the first of their names to their children.
So when Jose Antonio Flores Diaz, marries Rosa Maria Garcia Garrido, they retain their individual names. However, when they have children, the children will have the last names Flores Garcia.
My dad is Italian, and back in Italy, women legally retain their birth names, and my mum is Hispanic-American, so her surname follows the Hispanic naming custom detailed above. Therefore, even though they were both living in England when they met and married, neither is from a culture where the woman takes the man's name upon marriage, so my mum kept her name.
My siblings and I just have our dad's last name, although my parents did toy with the idea of adding the first of mum's name at the end, as per the Hispanic custom. However they decided that due to living in England, it was best to keep it simple. Instead they decided to give each of us the first of my mum's last names as a third (yes a THIRD) middle name.
I'm not sure what I'll do, when the time comes, because I love my Italian last name. I guess it will depend on what the last name is of the guy I end up marrying. My older sister changed hers to her husband's socially, but retains her maiden name for work.