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White people dont know the struggle of regular beatings. watch

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    (Original post by cherryred90s)
    That's not true. Hitler is just one extreme example. I was spanked as a child, and I have the utmost respect for my parents. I have friends who have never been sparked and they now verbally abuse and fight with their parents. I would never even think to do that. If the child is spanked only for bad behaviour, then I think it will do them the world of good in the long run. You could argue that those who were not spanked are more likely to disrespect their parents because they know that the consequences of doing so will not be harsh
    maybe that's your personality .....but I know personally being hit as child made me angry and furious at my parents - definitely no respect from me. If I had been someone regularly beaten or something -- I think I would just become terrified of my parents, not respectful....just scared in case I didn't do what they wanted - that doesn't make a healthy person.
    I really don't get these people who say they were hit as child and it made them much more respectful - maybe it's just certain types of personalities.....as in if you're naturally cocky and overconfident then hitting could be good for you, or you could handle it......personally I don't think many could, like why are some people's kids misbehaving so much in the first place that would cause them to have to hit them anyway?
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    (Original post by cherryred90s)
    No, my scenario works in an ideal world. That's why there are thousands of people who were spanked as a child and have grown to respect their parents, I am one of them. I do believe that you can raise well mannered children without spanking, but it depends on the child and whether the word 'no' is enough, which in many cases, it isn't.

    There you go again with the word 'abuse'. Whilst sexual abuse (a rather extreme example you've used) is a terrible thing to go through, it doesn't mean that punishment should no longer be a consequence of bad behaviour. For the children who have been abused, they would normally attend some form of therapy session if their behaviour stems from the abuse they've endured.

    Right so you don't believe in spanking and you don't believe in a naughty step/chair so what do you believe in?
    I believe in talking, to find out the reason for bad behaviour, I believe in setting parameters, I was always taught to say please and thank you good parameters to have. I don't disagree with discipline, but discipline is not punishment. All the correct things you said are great, as long as the abuse stops, and one day it will be outlawed, half of Europe have already outlawed any corporal punishment, so you may as well get used to the idea. Else one day you may find yourself in the dock facing a charge of child abuse, whether you like it or not that is exactly what it is. Most professionals in the area of child care agree that corporal punishment only has negative effects.

    Your testimony of people who turned out ok, doesn't mean a thing, they would in all likelihood have turned out right without the abuse. You obviously have no idea of child sexual abuse, a great many carry it over in there lives and it does affect them, not all come out and reveal it, so how do they get counselling(?).

    Yes abused children do grow up to love their parents, it is amazing what children and adults will put up with for an idea that mommy and daddy love them, and it is evidential that in a lot of these abusive parent, child relationships are in religious families. The US is a perfect example of this where the parents have the right to smack, and in a lot of the Bible belt, it is still allowed in schools.

    I realise it is hard to accept that your parents are child abusers, but the cap seems to fit well.
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    (Original post by dozyrosie)
    I believe in talking, to find out the reason for bad behaviour, I believe in setting parameters, I was always taught to say please and thank you good parameters to have. I don't disagree with discipline, but discipline is not punishment. All the correct things you said are great, as long as the abuse stops, and one day it will be outlawed, half of Europe have already outlawed any corporal punishment, so you may as well get used to the idea. Else one day you may find yourself in the dock facing a charge of child abuse, whether you like it or not that is exactly what it is. Most professionals in the area of child care agree that corporal punishment only has negative effects.

    Your testimony of people who turned out ok, doesn't mean a thing, they would in all likelihood have turned out right without the abuse. You obviously have no idea of child sexual abuse, a great many carry it over in there lives and it does affect them, not all come out and reveal it, so how do they get counselling(?).

    Yes abused children do grow up to love their parents, it is amazing what children and adults will put up with for an idea that mommy and daddy love them, and it is evidential that in a lot of these abusive parent, child relationships are in religious families. The US is a perfect example of this where the parents have the right to smack, and in a lot of the Bible belt, it is still allowed in schools.

    I realise it is hard to accept that your parents are child abusers, but the cap seems to fit well.
    Good luck having a deep and meaningful talk with your 4 year old. You're living in a dream land if you honestly think that 'talking' is all it takes and that you will never have to resort to any further punishment.

    You're clearly delusional if you think spanking is the same as abuse. You probably think circumcision and ear piercings are also forms of abuse, lol.

    I can just picture you now. In a supermarket aisle with your 3 year old screaming at the top of his lungs for a new toy and you'll be alongside, trying to reason and have a good old chat with him, before he starts scratching and spitting at you as onlookers walk by in disgust at the woman who cannot control her own child. You've got it all under control though, because when you get home, little Jimmy won't be getting any dessert right? I'll stay tuned for your episode on supernanny.
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    True. But here's a lighter take on it.

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    I don't see how and why child abuse is being talked about on this thread. The person who started this thread is on the subject of beatings, discipline wise???? I don't know why people are bringing in white kids being victims of abuse? Of course thats an issue too but these are two different topics. It's abuse when the parents go over the line and forget trying to enforce better behaviour and just beating thier children with no purpose. I don't think he meant regular beatings in the form of abuse? It's for disiplinary purposes. Am I missunderstanding something /:
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    (Original post by Charmaine944)
    I don't see how and why child abuse is being talked about on this thread. The person who started this thread is on the subject of beatings, discipline wise???? I don't know why people are bringing in white kids being victims of abuse? Of course thats an issue too but these are two different topics. It's abuse when the parents go over the line and forget trying to enforce better behaviour and just beating thier children with no purpose. I don't think he meant regular beatings in the form of abuse? It's for disiplinary purposes. Am I missunderstanding something /:
    Exactly what I was thinking? If you do something really bad, you're getting beats. Simple as! Your child swears at their teacher and you think it would be better to talk to the child, thats fine with you but I will deal with my child differently.
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    (Original post by JXLS)
    Exactly what I was thinking? If you do something really bad, you're getting beats. Simple as! Your child swears at their teacher and you think it would be better to talk to the child, thats fine with you but I will deal with my child differently.
    Thank you, I'm not gonna bash anyone's way of disciplining. Just don't twist something. Pure ignorance.
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    (Original post by Charmaine944)
    Thank you, I'm not gonna bash anyone's way of disciplining. Just don't twist something. Pure ignorance.
    Truss me, couldn't agree with you anymore!
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    I've had my ass whooped and handed back to me too when I was smaller.

    I was a naughty child though so...but I'm grateful for my parents. I'm really good at dodging objects that are being thrown at me now.
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    (Original post by Evening)
    That's a stupid generalisation to make. Thousands of white children are abused daily in the UK alone. To make such outlandish claims without any prior evidence is moronic.
    Was going to say something like this. I feel the OP might be taking the piss here but at the same time it seems to be a cultural thing with black people. Fortunately, abuse is not cultural. But discipline through whippings sadly is for many different types of people, not just black. People joke all the time about white people putting their kids simply on "timeouts." And how they let their kids talk to them any kind of way. I have white friends and I've been to their houses when we were kids and I've seen them scream at their folks and all, drink/smoke and swear. And in front of me no repercussion. However if that happened in a black home it's fair to say the mother at least would send a hand to their mouth real quick in front of everyone and for some reason I laugh as I type this.

    I've just never white people reminisce during a regular conversation or something about being beaten, the way black people have, excluding being abused of course, but normally people are quiet about abuse. Not to say whippings don't happen. But culturally I think many black people can relate to this.
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    (Original post by cherryred90s)
    Good luck having a deep and meaningful talk with your 4 year old. You're living in a dream land if you honestly think that 'talking' is all it takes and that you will never have to resort to any further punishment.

    You're clearly delusional if you think spanking is the same as abuse. You probably think circumcision and ear piercings are also forms of abuse, lol.

    I can just picture you now. In a supermarket aisle with your 3 year old screaming at the top of his lungs for a new toy and you'll be alongside, trying to reason and have a good old chat with him, before he starts scratching and spitting at you as onlookers walk by in disgust at the woman who cannot control her own child. You've got it all under control though, because when you get home, little Jimmy won't be getting any dessert right? I'll stay tuned for your episode on supernanny.
    I take it by this tirade that you would spank a 3 year old, how sick do you have to be to spank a 3 year old, I cannot imagine the vileness of such abuse. Circumcision is definitely abuse, and ear piercings are unnecessary cosmetic junk.
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    (Original post by dozyrosie)
    I take it by this tirade that you would spank a 3 year old, how sick do you have to be to spank a 3 year old, I cannot imagine the vileness of such abuse. Circumcision is definitely abuse, and ear piercings are unnecessary cosmetic junk.

    well, I wouldn't spank a 15yr old now would I

    There's clearly something wrong with you as you seem to think everything is abuse. Prepare to have your children walk all over you, meanwhile, MY kid will know how to behave.
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    (Original post by Danno190)
    Still have flashbacks now and again.

    I guess that's what you get when your (now ex) step dad had a violent past and didn't want us turning out like he did.

    Well at least it worked. I never wanted to be anything like him.
    thats a sad chidhood you had
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    (Original post by Cherie Amour)
    Was going to say something like this. I feel the OP might be taking the piss here but at the same time it seems to be a cultural thing with black people. Fortunately, abuse is not cultural. But discipline through whippings sadly is for many different types of people, not just black. People joke all the time about white people putting their kids simply on "timeouts." And how they let their kids talk to them any kind of way. I have white friends and I've been to their houses when we were kids and I've seen them scream at their folks and all, drink/smoke and swear. And in front of me no repercussion. However if that happened in a black home it's fair to say the mother at least would send a hand to their mouth real quick in front of everyone and for some reason I laugh as I type this.

    I've just never white people reminisce during a regular conversation or something about being beaten, the way black people have, excluding being abused of course, but normally people are quiet about abuse. Not to say whippings don't happen. But culturally I think many black people can relate to this.
    i can relate, sounds normal to me
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    I've got this sense before, I'm white. My parents wouldn't need to. Maybe black teens are more wilful, or maybe their folks are ore aggressive. I wouold probably hate my parents if they beat me. Most I got was a smack when really young.
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    No, instead their paedophile fathers or step fathers will rape them.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
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    (Original post by cherryred90s)

    I can just picture you now. In a supermarket aisle with your 3 year old screaming at the top of his lungs for a new toy and you'll be alongside, trying to reason and have a good old chat with him, before he starts scratching and spitting at you as onlookers walk by in disgust at the woman who cannot control her own child. You've got it all under control though, because when you get home, little Jimmy won't be getting any dessert right? I'll stay tuned for your episode on supernanny.
    Yeah but maybe this is race related, or bad parenting related. What I mean is the fact the kid is in that state in the first place. I was never like that as a kid. So they would have been able to reason. Sometimes I did something mischevious, I did used to pour rice and pasta on the floor, but that was it. If the kid is really upset and aggressive, then maybe the parenting isn't good in the first place? Or maybe it's just something more taboo, that black people are more aggressive in general.
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    (Original post by diamondluck)
    No, instead their paedophile fathers or step fathers will rape them.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    I've heard this, too, apparently it is true that although black men can have more seuxal partners and sex, they are less likely to be paedos. There's figures on it.
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    (Original post by SaucissonSecCy)
    Yeah but maybe this is race related, or bad parenting related. What I mean is the fact the kid is in that state in the first place. I was never like that as a kid. So they would have been able to reason. Sometimes I did something mischevious, I did used to pour rice and pasta on the floor, but that was it. If the kid is really upset and aggressive, then maybe the parenting isn't good in the first place? Or maybe it's just something more taboo, that black people are more aggressive in general.
    All kids will tantrum. The ones who are properly punished for it will know how to behave, the ones who aren't will continue to tantrum because they aren't afraid of the consequences or they deem the repercussions as mediocre/trivial enough that they can get away with the bad behaviour.

    Black people are not more aggressive, we just discipline differently.
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    Perhaps if my parents had been more strict with me I wouldn't of gone to special school and I wouldn't be in mess now. At my special school everything was done for me it was only when I reached college the second time round as an adult did I realise how useless I am


    Posted from TSR Mobile
 
 
 
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