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Why do people take so long to get on trains? Watch

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      (Original post by PQ)
      Yep

      Attempting to derail the deraillers is always worth a try. Did it work?
      Um no

      And did Nympho and I say the same thing? :facepalm:


      (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
      I never joke, ZuluK.
      Yeah... But your avi is one... Isn't it?

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      I'm kidding... I'm kidding... Please don't ban me...
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        (Original post by Apache Tyrone)
        I was summoned to this thread yes, with the sole intention to gauge how good your roasts are (indeed you have a reputation).

        However upon closer inspection the level of thought you put into them are sub par at best, I feel like retching on how you and other simple minded users find them 'funny' - The badge of unoriginality rightfully belongs to you, madame.

        I'm very picky and i'm still confused as to why you are commenting about my private life as i didn't give you suffient permission to discuss upon - I can smell the desperation simmering through my laptop screen.

        I've cooked roasts and indeed you felt them penetrate through to your feels, much like how you dream about BBC everynight. I already anticipate the damage control you will make to make yourself feel somewhat better, really doubt you will tbh.
        The thing is Mr Tyrone, you are the one who reeks of desperation. You keep coming back to answer me saying how bad my roasts are yet you have not delivered a good roast yourself.

        I have a reputation? If I do, it's not as widely known as yours and I must say, Mr Tyrone, you too have let me down. Your comebacks and your pars were weak. Being Asian, I like my roasts extra spicy and hot, I couldn't even taste any heat in yours.

        Like I said, come back in a few years when you've gotten better with experience. I suggest battling with Nympho and then working your way up

        Oh and permission about your personal life, you gave it with your first reply to me on this thread
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        (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
        We are sorry to announce that the... seven thirty-nine thread by... Captain Jack has... derailed. This is due to... the wrong kind of posts in the thread. Please listen for further announcements.
        Not even an apology for the delay to the service. Appalling customer service.

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        (Original post by DiddyDec)
        Not even an apology for the delay to the service. Appalling customer service.

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        (Original post by ZuluK)
        The thing is Mr Tyrone, you are the one who reeks of desperation. You keep coming back to answer me saying how bad my roasts are yet you have not delivered a good roast yourself.

        I have a reputation? If I do, it's not as widely known as yours and I must say, Mr Tyrone, you too have let me down. Your comebacks and your pars were weak. Being Asian, I like my roasts extra spicy and hot, I couldn't even taste any heat in yours.

        Like I said, come back in a few years when you've gotten better with experience. I suggest battling with Nympho and then working your way up

        Oh and permission about your personal life, you gave it with your first reply to me on this thread
        I am replying under instruction of 2 tsr members, @acupofgreentea and Ethereal World for their own enjoyment. You are merely perpetuating and ******* my epeen - growing my tsr ego bigger my playing along in this tasteless conversation, indeed for someone with such a reputation for 'reks' you really let yourself down on this one, Especially the so called 'reks' where you go about objectifying yourself and trying to establish yourself and your so called 'banter' as unique, you're as common as the typical meme posting 9gager - terri ma di lan.

        Explicit ppermission was never granted, you realy are just begging it again.

        Its nearly 12pm, i feel bored now. Come back when you've worked on some meaningful reks.
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          (Original post by Apache Tyrone)
          I am replying under instruction of 2 tsr members, @acupofgreentea and Ethereal World for their own enjoyment. You are merely perpetuating and ******* my epeen - growing my tsr ego bigger my playing along in this tasteless conversation, indeed for someone with such a reputation for 'reks' you really let yourself down on this one, Especially the so called 'reks' where you go about objectifying yourself and trying to establish yourself and your so called 'banter' as unique, you're as common as the typical meme posting 9gager - terri ma di lan.

          Explicit ppermission was never granted, you realy are just begging it again.

          Its nearly 12pm, i feel bored now. Come back when you've worked on some meaningful reks.
          You really are under the thumb of two women.. And you call yourself a man? :lol:

          See, you know what they say about big egos... Just putting it out there.

          You sound as if your ego has been bruised. You keep coming back and you keep getting knocked down. Oh Mr Tyrone, it seems as though you're the one who is into self-punishment

          Come back when you've worked on some meaningful reks. - a moment ago you said I was imitating you and now it seems you're doing the same to me... Well, you do learn from the best

          Until next time, Mr Tyrone :hugs:
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          Captain Jack,

          I am really sorry for derailing your thread about trains.

          I don't mind if you want to delay the service for some cleaning and then we can set off again when everything is in order.

          Thank you,

          A regular customer of your service.
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          (Original post by Ethereal World)
          A regular customer of your service.
          I'm sure you are...

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          (Original post by DiddyDec)
          Not even an apology for the delay to the service. Appalling customer service.

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          If you would like to apply for a refund please obtain a refund form 645D23B1 (if the day on which the incident occured has less than 6 letters, or 645D23B2 if the day of the week has more than 6 letters) from the ticket office, open every Monday morning between 11:12am and 11:32am when the moon is in its waxing phase except for bank holidays and depending on how heavy the weekend was, or Thursdays between 3:30 and 4pm when the moon is in its waning phase.

          Please obtain three copies of the form and fill them out using a fountain pen with black Indian dipping ink. Please write in block capitals only and cross boxes, don't use ticks. Failure to follow these instructions mean that your application will be rejected. Please keep one copy for your records, send one copy to the office and sign the third copy in your own blood and then sacrifice it to Shamash, the Mesopotamian god of travelers. Please make sure you perform the sacrifice before sending the other forms off as we will not be able to issue a refund without his approval.

          Please send your form by first class post and include a self-addressed first class envelope so that we can post your refund back to you. Refund will be issued in Lewis Pounds only. Your refund may take between 6 weeks and 6 years to process.
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          (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
          We are sorry to announce that the... seven thirty-nine thread by... Captain Jack has... derailed. This is due to... the wrong kind of posts in the thread. Please listen for further announcements.
          Or maybe the thread in front of this one is experiencing technical difficulties.
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          (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
          x
          Seems easy enough.

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          (Original post by homeland.lsw)
          Ethereal World
          What about at the ticket gates? :angry:
          Any normal, sane person prepares their Oyster Card well before getting close to the ticket gates, but their are always these people who insist on looking in their bag for the Oyster, RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE GATE?
          Why?
          Why do they do this?
          It's especially annoying when it's in a small station that only has like three gates.
          THIS! I use my watch, just double tap it and swipe it on my way through... It drives me nuts when people dawdle on the stairs before platforms too.
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          The problem with getting on trains is herd mentality. The Virgin Train I sometimes catch at rush hour is 11 carriages long yet about 95% of the people swarm for the 3-4 doors nearest the ticket office and then spend the journey packed in like sardines. The other 5% off us spend 30 seconds walking down to the far end of the platform and then you've practically got a vestibule to yourself.
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          (Original post by Ethereal World)
          I am really sorry for derailing your thread about trains.
          Sounds on topic to me?
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          (Original post by Captain Jack)
          Sounds on topic to me?
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          (Original post by Ethereal World)
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          So did we reach a conclusion among all that derailing? What is WRONG with people?!

          (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
          If you would like to apply for a refund please obtain a refund form 645D23B1 (if the day on which the incident occured has less than 6 letters, or 645D23B2 if the day of the week has more than 6 letters) from the ticket office, open every Monday morning between 11:12am and 11:32am when the moon is in its waxing phase except for bank holidays and depending on how heavy the weekend was, or Thursdays between 3:30 and 4pm when the moon is in its waning phase.

          Please obtain three copies of the form and fill them out using a fountain pen with black Indian dipping ink. Please write in block capitals only and cross boxes, don't use ticks. Failure to follow these instructions mean that your application will be rejected. Please keep one copy for your records, send one copy to the office and sign the third copy in your own blood and then sacrifice it to Shamash, the Mesopotamian god of travelers. Please make sure you perform the sacrifice before sending the other forms off as we will not be able to issue a refund without his approval.

          Please send your form by first class post and include a self-addressed first class envelope so that we can post your refund back to you. Refund will be issued in Lewis Pounds only. Your refund may take between 6 weeks and 6 years to process.
          As you're the first conductor I've come across I'm going to shout at you a bit first before I submit my forms.
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          (Original post by Captain Jack)
          So did we reach a conclusion among all that derailing? What is WRONG with people?!
          Indecisiveness and lack of forethought.

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          (Original post by DiddyDec)
          Indecisiveness and lack of forethought.

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          Id go with that. Indecision is the biggest problem facing the human race.
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          (Original post by Captain Jack)
          Id go with that. Indecision is the biggest problem facing the human race.
          There is too much choice. If trains didn't have seats we wouldn't have this problem.
         
         
         
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