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    (Original post by s4ffy)
    literally my worst nightmare. logistically, her staying overnight in the city makes sense as it's at least a four hour drive back, but I assumed she'd stay in a hotel overnight. Apparently she's going to stay with me in halls and when I refused, she got quite upset and offended. am I in the wrong here? I tried to explain that I needed to settle in on my own and get to know my own flatmates and go out etc, but she said she'd just stay in my room and not interfere, but... just the thought of it it horrific. I honestly do not know how to have this discussion with her.
    having your mum sleep in your room in halls wont be a great icebreaker with your flatmates for the first night. I would explain to your mum that you need to settle in alone and that her being there may make your other flat mates uncomfortable considering it is the first night and everyone will be getting to know eachother and going out.

    If one of my flatmates mums/dads stayed in their room on the first night of freshers I would have been a little uncomfortable.
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    Oh dear, that is awkward. I'm surprised she doesn't see things from your point of view. I understand why you feel the way you do, the timing is inappropriate.
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    Not only may there be an issue with her being allowed to stay in the accommodation, which is a bad idea in the first place, but she may not be allowed into the various events organised.

    The SU building will probably only allow students to enter. Ditto the bars.
    The whole event is set up for freshers. I would guess that security wouldn't be too happy with non. Freshers wandering about .

    Imagine if a random male was wandering the campus looking for a slightly pissed fresher? Would your mum be happy to know that the uni were happy with that attitude after she dropped her little treasure off?
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    show her this thread as proof that it is really not normal to do... she might stay in your room but that probably means not sleeping much as it's likely to be loud in halls the first night, your flatmate might bring someone back etc, you need to feel you can go out and join in and come home trashed at 3am if you want to and all that is going to be horrible for your mum tbh... if she's sat in your room and you don't have to be there then it shouldn't affect your flatmates or you that much but I doubt that's how it will happen, you're not going to feel you can just leave her there all evening by herself and if she comes out other people will feel awkward about being noisy or drunk or whatever
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    Take a bit of money out of your student loan and get her a nice hotel for the night and explain to her that you would be happy any other time of the year but as it's the first night of uni you want to be independent
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    Ideally lodge her in hotel, but if she insists she's staying with you, try and keep her out of sight and for God's sake don't tell anyone your mother is staying in your room, other than those that need to know, reception staff and the hall manager etc.*

    If you've got an ensuite room, you should be able to keep her hidden and remember to bring her food at regular intervals.*You'll just have to accept you won't be able to bring someone back to your room on the first night.
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    If all else fails, put on Mean Girls and keep playing the scenes with Regina's mother.
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    (Original post by Cubchoo)
    Ideally lodge her in hotel, but if she insists she's staying with you, try and keep her out of sight and for God's sake don't tell anyone your mother is staying in your room, other than those that need to know, reception staff and the hall manager etc.*

    If you've got an ensuite room, you should be able to keep her hidden and remember to bring her food at regular intervals.*You'll just have to accept you won't be able to bring someone back to your room on the first night.
    The second paragraph makes the OP's mother sound like some sort of hostage of pet lmao ' bring her food '
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    (Original post by domonict)
    Not only may there be an issue with her being allowed to stay in the accommodation, which is a bad idea in the first place, but she may not be allowed into the various events organised.

    The SU building will probably only allow students to enter. Ditto the bars.
    The whole event is set up for freshers. I would guess that security wouldn't be too happy with non. Freshers wandering about .

    Imagine if a random male was wandering the campus looking for a slightly pissed fresher? Would your mum be happy to know that the uni were happy with that attitude after she dropped her little treasure off?
    It's bad enough letting her sleep in your bed! Let alone bringing her to the SU bar! I'd be mortified lol
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    Book a hotel room and stay with your mum the first night there after you drop your things at your flat and say hi to your flatmates. Tell mum non-students are not allowed in halls. Later at night ask your mom permission to join the fresher's night and go back to the hotel afterwards to spend the night. Have a great breakfast with her in the morning and tell mum your experience last night. You still have the next fresher's nights afterall.

    Your mum doesn't want to interfere, she's probably just in denial state to see her pumpkin pie leaving home. Who knows she'd bring you to the supermarket and buy you more groceries and snacks! Lol

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    (Original post by s4ffy)
    literally my worst nightmare. logistically, her staying overnight in the city makes sense as it's at least a four hour drive back, but I assumed she'd stay in a hotel overnight. Apparently she's going to stay with me in halls and when I refused, she got quite upset and offended. am I in the wrong here? I tried to explain that I needed to settle in on my own and get to know my own flatmates and go out etc, but she said she'd just stay in my room and not interfere, but... just the thought of it it horrific. I honestly do not know how to have this discussion with her.
    What's the verdict OP, surely you must have told your mum this is social suicide?
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    (Original post by s4ffy)
    literally my worst nightmare. logistically, her staying overnight in the city makes sense as it's at least a four hour drive back, but I assumed she'd stay in a hotel overnight. Apparently she's going to stay with me in halls and when I refused, she got quite upset and offended. am I in the wrong here? I tried to explain that I needed to settle in on my own and get to know my own flatmates and go out etc, but she said she'd just stay in my room and not interfere, but... just the thought of it it horrific. I honestly do not know how to have this discussion with her.
    She's driving you there FFS, if you're going to be a **** about this take the train. :curious:
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    (Original post by The Empire Odyssey)
    What's the verdict OP, surely you must have told your mum this is social suicide?
    No need to be so dramatic. Only a very insecure person would think so. It is only one night.

    Plenty of good suggestions have been made, but some of you seem pretty ungrateful she will have spent 4 hours driving oh and the tens of thousands of £'s shes shelled out assisting the child to get to Uni.

    Uni lasts 3 years, your relatiosnhip with your mum should last a lot longer.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    No need to be so dramatic. Only a very insecure person would think so. It is only one night.

    Plenty of good suggestions have been made, but some of you seem pretty ungrateful she will have spent 4 hours driving oh and the tens of thousands of £'s shes shelled out assisting the child to get to Uni.

    Uni lasts 3 years, your relatiosnhip with your mum should last a lot longer.
    I wish I gave a damn, but I really don't love.
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    (Original post by The Empire Odyssey)
    I wish I gave a damn, but I really don't love.
    Too busy having a drama. Social suicide indeed... Lol.
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    Get there on public transport!
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    Hey mum, can you scoot over, trying to have drunken sex.

    Yeah, tell her to book a hotel and make her take you for breakfast hungover.
 
 
 
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